I'm 26. I broke up with my ex after 10 years because he gave me an STD he caught from cheating on me with a coworker (nothing incurable, already have that sorted out).
Last year I thought I was going to be married by now, I'm single instead.
How do I date again? Where do I look for a partner? Am I too old?
Is this bait? Most people don't meet the person they marry until their late 20s or 30s or even later.
>26
You're old and used up now and probably still hung up on your ex.
No sane man will want to pick up your wrinkly busted ass
I mean, the average age for marriage is 28, for women in the US, and I want to believe most people know each other for a couple years before getting married.
So I'd say that nope.
Relatable. Kinda. No STD involved or being cheated on, but me and my ex broke up a year ago. We would’ve been married by now. It’s crazy. I’m 23.
I mean, I agree that I'm old and used up, but I've been single for a year and definitely over my ex. Don't talk to him, don't think about him much, changed my life completely.
Nobody cares.
Why would anyone go for and old roastie with baggage and unrealistic expectations when younger women are better in every way.
No one is forcing you specifically to user, I'm very happy not dating you either.
I hope you find a barely legal girl to love.
Get in shape, go out, let people know you are single. Will get offers in less than a week. Hope you didn't relax too much thinking you were safe about marriage.
I'm in great shape. I was never fat, but I started working out more when I was about to get married.
I don't know how to do the whole "go out and let people know you're single". Who should I tell, lol?
Do you have female friends that still go out in your area? Contact them and go out.
If you are fit i guess you do some sports or go to a gym, usually there's a beer evening with those once in a while, just take the chance and go out with them, you get to know more people etc.
Possibly ask cousins your age, maybe they know someone or go out.
I mean, I go out, but most guys who approach when I'm out with my friends want to hook up. I never had any form of genuine conversation even with any of them.
I don't know if my expectations are off, but I really don't want to fuck random dudes till I find one I genuinely connect with.
Guys are such dogs.
Anyway, 26 is not too old OP and you can still take your time if you want a man at some point. I think if you just broke up you definitely need to wait for a year before getting with someone else. Clear your head.
And, I wasn't even looking when I met my husband. He was with a consulting group that was working a project at the company I work for and met that way. We didn't go out until they finished the work and when he was gone it really bothered me and then he sent me a text and asked me out. I had nearly 6 months to get to know him before ever going out and I was able to see how he worked, how dedicated he is and how he treated everyone, and he never was a flirt with any of the women and he has never disappointed me.
That's normal i guess. Try different places, maybe the people will be different. It's a game of chances, will take a bit to find someone you can connect with. Obviously in pubs the chances for random hookups are higher, but if you got other interests that have social events it might work (thinking of mountain walks since i like those, usually they attract completly different people, or at least they show a completly different attitude).
That's a very sweet story, I'm very happy for you.
I thought about meeting someone through work, since I work in a hospital and we're over a thousand and there's no "don't shit where you eat" policy. But yeah, I feel a little sketchy doing it. I know it happens all the time, but still.
I might get some new hobbies like suggested. I changed towns after the break up so I'm either out with my friends from work or at work.
Don't worry, you're fine.
If the average age of marriage is 28, that means there are plenty of people getting married later than that (or a few getting married at the age of 15,000).
Finding a new guy is simple. Just get yourself out there. Don't be too worried about the exact specifications you are looking for, people will always surprise you. Just go wherever there are guys and smile a lot.
Just be patient OP. The great thing about not putting pressure on yourself, you don't overlook obvious red flags when you meet a new guy just to be with someone.
Like with my husband, I knew he was great to be around, everybody thought so too, but I didn't really realize I had feelings for him until he was gone and that kept me from doing something stupid. What I did not know was he was watching me too
I don't really know where to look, to be honest. I want something meaningful, but most people who approach me are very shallow and our interactions and up being fucking depressing.
I don't have any exact specifications, I want someone I feel compatible to me, who is also a decent person and a functioning adult. Which is a lot, maybe? I don't know.
If I get another cheesy 2008 pick up artist line, I'm going to commit sudoku in the middle of the pub.
Nah, I don't want to end up with an asshole because I had to end up with someone.
Never have sex with a man before marriage. If he doesn’t have the self control to not have sex before marriage, he will not have the self control to not cheat.
Dont listen to this guy. If you're clean from std I dont see why you wouldnt get a date eventually. Im a virgin dude myself and still hoping to find someone special soon. Im not far from 30 either.
A man can also tell me we're waiting till marriage while he's fucking left and right. There's no guarantee with not getting cheated on, sadly.
Shit happens, I hope I'll find a decent man at some point.
While that might be true, there will be other signs of bad character that you will notice if you actually get to know the person rather than built an emotional connection that you’ll be blinded by because you’re addicted to the sex you’re getting, if that makes sense.
Femcel cope.
I’m a male and femcels aren’t real retard
Unfortunately, that's not how real life works.
If you think that the only reason why people overlook bad traits in their partner is because they're addicted to sex they're getting, then you have a very juvenile and unrealistic idea of how relationships work.
I was with my ex for 4 years before we had sex. It took him 5 more to cheat on me. I knew him very well, and we had a true emotional connection far before we even started having sex.
People are more complex than one simple rule you like to fit everyone in.
Or you’re just lying
oh nonononono
Women are the most privileged group of people in the world.
People will treat threads like this as bait because it is hard to believe you haven't figured out how to function in the world yet.
Whatever you like telling yourself dude.
Realistic adultposting.
Pathetic cope.
Stay single Betsy, you don’t need no man mmhmm
I just started to try and find a partner as an adult, I obviously haven't it figured out. It has been a few months, maybe.
I'm asking how to fix it and how to get a better kind of attention, got some helpful advice.
I'm not even a feminist, and there's nothing feminist about my post. Just realistic.
Try dating sites or going finding meetup groups for your specific hobbies/interests. What exactly are you doing with your life? If you have a career where you're meeting different people then someone will come along eventually.
>dating sites
I tried tinder as it's the most active around here and it has been a quite cancerous experience.
Meet up groups are a good idea.
>What exactly are you doing with your life?
Work in a hospital, in a very female dominated speciality. I can't really hang out with clients, lol. I thought about getting to know some male colleagues, but I feel very weird about it like I'm shitting where I'm eating.
You are a strong independent woman. You don't need a man. Become a lesbian
Tinder is mainly for hookups, so I'd avoid that if you want a legit relationship. Try OKCupid or Match.com or something like that.
Make friends with your co-workers, male and female. Just get to know them on a platonic level and see where things go. Plus, just by being friends you can get an in on their social circles, exposing you to more potential mates.
Good luck!
Why did you break up with him? Your ex is clearly a man of high-status which was proven by his ability to fuck a coworker and get an STD, most guys struggle to just get one girl to like them. So I suggest you take him back again, granny.
just fuck me
>Try OKCupid or Match.com or something like that.
They're not super active in my area but maybe it's worth a shot.
I'm decent friends with my female coworkers and we go out sometimes. I don't naturally meet a lot of young men, I'd have to force it a bit.
He fucked someone who slept around enough to get Chlamydia, I doubt that it takes a man of high status to get in her pants.
My point still stands, sluts fuck, but they don't everyone.
Yeah: he's average. If sluts only slept with actually high status males, they wouldn't be sluts as high status men are not that common.
Unless you want to say that 75% of men are "high status".
Pic related?
Lol, no.
She's Jessica Clements, if you wanna fap.
Im on nofap day 87
You're getting some bad advice in this thread OP.
26 is not too old to be forever alone and locked out of marriage, but it is getting to the tail end of it and the longer you wait the more of an uphill struggle you are going to have.
The age of desirable men getting married may be rising, but the age of the girls they marry still remains low - you are competing with the youth, beauty, energy, enthusiasm, and fertility of 18, 19, 20, and 21-year-olds. It sounds like you have your head on straight and are taking good care of yourself to be wife material so you can win this competition but don't wait around for a guy to show up at your doorstep with a ring. Remember how much energy and passion you had at 19? That will be difficult but not impossible to overcome.
The most important thing is that you get yourself out there socially and let it be KNOWN that you are looking for a SERIOUS commitment and not just 'building a career and finding yourself'. This is the #1 advantage you have over the younger girls because marriage-minded men are looking for indicators of this.
Of course. Wanting something meaningful is what we all want. What I was trying to say was "don't think too much about the details". If you have some qualities you find really attractive in one person, don't worry about them in the next. What works for one guy might be the opposite in the next, and vice versa.
This need for "standards" or criteria in a partner has ruined a lot of great relationships simply because the people involved were too shortsighted to look at the whole instead of each detail separately.
It is fully possible that the best fit you will ever find is quite dissimilar from what you imagine is the best possible fit. That is why I said that the most important thing you can do is simply get yourself out there with an open mind.
I have found great relationships with beautiful women, and average women. With smart women, and not at all smart women. With prude virgins, and a slutty mom. White, black, asian. Each time my notions were challenged, because I did not think I could appreciate the qualities I saw.
So go ahead and look for meaningful. But meaningful, like a fling, starts with a hello and an assessment. And the more hellos you get to, the more meaningful relations you will be able to find. And the more you can appreciate the people around you, the more people can be meaningful to you.
I agree with parts of what you're saying, and thank you for your advice.
If I can be completely honest with you, I think there's a big disconnect between what I consider desirable and what you think I should consider desirable. I'm looking for someone I genuinely connect with on a personal level, someone I can share myself fully with and who will share himself with me. I doubt a 30 year old man who thinks marrying a teenager because she's beautiful and youthful is a good life choice is someone I'd ever be happy with. Not that I don't get why, but I don't have what they want and they don't have what I want.
I don't care much about anything too specific. I want someone I feel compatible with and am attracted to, but I never cared about details and technicalities. As long as I feel attracted to them, have fun with them and feel like we're compatible in the long run because we have similar desires I'm sold.
I genuinely care about intelligence and wit because I know that even if I'm sold initially and don't care much, a man who can't entertain me intellectually ends up annoying me quickly. I'm the same with friends, or anyone really.
embrace the poly open relationship pill
Would rather die alone.
If it makes you happy go for it, but not for me.