>26 YO
>NEET
>Depressed (+ other "friends")
>Shut-in
I am planning on going out this wednessday. I barely get out, only to a shop or for a lone walk, I'm planning to drive into a big city closest to me and...
AND THEN WHAT? What do normal people do when they are out? I was thinking about just going to some shops and for a walk to a park.
I really don't have to shop but I really don't know what to do outside. Help. Give me ideas.
Ps. This will probably turn bad for me.
>Find friends
>Make them make the plans
>???
Profit
How do you people let your social abilities wither like this?
It's their autism man they were both with it
Where do you find them? Do they grow in forests? Do you stand in the middle of a square in the city and shout out that you are looking for friends?
I have 0 friends. Literally.
I didn't do shit. Years of bullying, years of controlling by my mother, some other things... It happens by itself.
See this post
>The gym
I have nothing to seek there. Can't gain weight. Can't work out. Don't have any extra weight to lose. Also, people with too low IQ go there, I wouldn't fit there at all.
>work
Too depressed and unmotivated.
>uni
Already finished.
>community college
Don't have anything like that here I guess.
>rec center
What's that?
>cafe
And what do I do there? I can drink coffee at home. And I don't even drink coffee.
>bar
I don't even drink alcohol.
>club
UGH NOPE
>the park
Already suggested that. What next?
>public squares
Wooow a place that exists. What about it?
>meetups
For what? Too generic.
>tinder, bumble
No.
>conventions
Don't have any aroudn my area.
>parties
Should I ask people if they will make a party for me?
>the grocery store
...
All in all your post added nothing to this topic. Did you even read what I was asking about? Not how to find a gf, but what to do in specific place at specific time... Also your answers to both questions are... to be honest - SHIT.
>HERE ARE SOME RANDOM PUBLIC PLACES THAT I WROTE DOWN, ENJOY!
Horrible, just horrible normiefuck-tier answer. Get away with shit like this.
>What do normal people do when they are out?
Not much, usually they go out and run errands like buying food for home or getting a new shirt or whatever. When young people "go out" they mean out with friends to a lively social place like a house party, a bar, a concert, a fair, a festival, a convention. If it were me, I'd see what museums were around and go there to look at some paintings or skeletons or cars or whatever. Is there a place in that city popular for walking around like a promenade, riverside/lakeside/oceanside area or something? They usually have nice restaurants to eat at and shops. When I travel, I'll usually go to one of those places for lunch and just ask the waitress if they know anything neat to do nearby with an afternoon off.
For example here in Los Angeles you can always go to Hollywood Blvd and walk around for a couple hours looking at shit, museum row being just down the road, or Venice Beach boardwalk always has weird people doing shit and quirky little shops selling touristy shit plus girls in bikinis, or Third Street Promenade/ Santa Monica Pier is just a nice area near the ocean with lots of shops and restaurants and other tourists.
Hope you have an alright time OP. I always felt worse doing those things because all I could focus on were people there with others while I was alone. As always. Hope it won't be the same for you.
>I always felt worse doing those things because all I could focus on were people there with others while I was alone. As always. Hope it won't be the same for you.
OP here again. I have the same. I don't really enjoy things. I am so invested in my loneliness and depression, it's the only thing that is on my minda 24/7...
Especially when out near people who have others.
you can gain weight if you really want to. you need to workout more.
go to a sports bar once in a blue moon in the afternoon or evening and drink some beer, eat some chicken wings, watch a game. you'll probably end up talking to someone else who is watching the game and making comments.
if youre depressed and unmotivated, get more sunlight and exercise, it works.
You should have TWO TYPES of HOBBIES
One that INTELLECTUALLY STIMULATES YOU, and one that EMOTIONALLY EXCITES YOU
two people who both love the same hobby will become friends or at least acquaintances. two excited people will have a good time, and perhaps meet other people who are into the same thing, and end up creating or joining a group.
cut out porn, junk food, drugs, alcohol, staying up late, and exercise more, get sunlight, etc.
if you really want to meet people, spend less time on screens
>reddit spacing
>this retarded first sentence
Stopped reading.
Just stay a virgin, then.
Where did I say anything about wanting to fuck/have a gf? Why did you ASSume I am a virgin?
heres my advice. get off of Jow Forums
Oh yes. This will surely help and get rid of all humanity's problems.
not all of humanity. just you
I want to see her feet
>"I am planning on-"
>plan isn't actually fully made
There's your first problem. No, you are not "planning on" going out, right now it's just a desire to until you find a local activity to do to make it into a plan. Learn what the word "plan" actually means, it's not the same as having an idea or desire. A plan requires full knowledge of what you intend to do and how you intend to act it out.
Second of all, your "me vs The Normies(tm)" mindset is extremely childish as fuck. Stop that gay shit.
You will be much better off when you realize that no, you are not a goddamn special snowflake for being depressed and mentally ill. You are not alone in being depressed and mentally ill either, because thousands of people have those illnesses too. Chances are, at some point you have accused one of these fellow mentally ill folks as a "normie" because people all look the same on the outside. Even mentally ill people learn to fake confidence/"normalness" to hide their own flaws from others for the purposes of saving social graces. You would be wise to realize "fake it 'til you make it" actually works. It's never easy to start, but it works.
Additionally, maybe instead of being so harsh and judgmental towards others (which is also probably why you're so depressed btw, you are too hard on yourself and your brain doesn't get that your standards are either too high or straight up hypocritical which is why you can't live up to them and keep making yourself unfairly miserable) treat others the way you want to be treated. Try kindness, to both others AND yourself.
Well if you don't want to do anything, you don't have to pretend that you do.
ok noah
museums, music events, parties, art exhibitions, public parks
those are usually the places i go when i'm alone and feel like going out
Do you not actually want to do anything? What do you even like doing? Do you like to read? Then go to a cafe or a library where there are other people and read. Do it regularly until eventually you meet someone. If there is nothing at all that you want to do, why are you even bothering?
kek not OP but thanks for the laugh
I have severe agoraphobia and I'm just about to be accepted for a free travel card.
As someone who's been "trapped" in their house for the last 2-3 years I can tell you what you can do when you get somewhere new. It's hard to find motivation but if you can get it and you can manage your fear of going out then as long as you're motivated you'll be golden.
So when I used to go out, a big thing was finding new places. Even if you don't do normie shit. It can be interesting to find new stores, new businesses, old landmarks, hidden paths, nice quiet areas outdoors. Aim to know every route like you're an autistic dungeon crawler.
As long as you're out going for a walk and nothing absurdly negative is going on, it's fine.
Just like when you take a walk to relax, you want to associate those positive feelings with going out somewhere.
>How do you people let your social abilities wither like this?
not OP but for me it was simple.
I have a health condition where the physical side effects have gotten worse over the years. A couple of years ago I was dislocating my knee every week and I was spending more and more time inside. After surgery I just ended up staying indoors because I was worried I was concerned over my pain and letting my other joints get that way.
Most of my family are dead and one of my friends killed himself because "tfw no gf". I had a bad doctor at the time and they didn't really provide much help, the stress of the situation and having severe depression as a result of my medication made me house bound over time. Everything just compounded as time went on and on until I was only leaving the house to go to the shops.
I got a new doctor, physio at home has been going well and someone recommended checking out a travel scheme for people with disabilities and mental impairments. Hopefully I can rebuild a lot of my social skills.
I like museums, try a museum.
this first paragraph is golden; I love exploring. do you like exploring, OP? It’s the main reason I go anywhere. Exploring new shopping areas, new nature areas, interesting places and events. Just basically checking out cool shit.
If you do this for a while you get good at finding interesting stuff to do, which also gives you things to share with / show to people if you want to form human relationships
This. Stop making up excuses and stop telling yourself "This isn't what I should be doing/I'll do it next time around", etc. Find the motivation to do something outside, stick with it, don't let it go. Because once you let that go, then you'll go back to square one aka staying inside 24/7. Cafes, bakeries, libraries, bars, museums, parties, the list is literally endless. You just have to find what you'd actually enjoy spending time with activities outside. Trial and error, but more importantly, try to take small steps at a time with said trials, not huge leaps because that might cause more harm than good in the long run of things. Don't even worry about trying to meet new people constantly/make new friends, because 9 times out of 10 that will happen naturally when you're enjoying whatever activities/hobbies outside, so worry about it later after you've established what activities and hobbies you like. Like that one famous saying, "You'll never know if you never try."