/SIG/ - SELF IMPROVEMENT GENERAL

Having trouble meeting people and making friends, loneliness is starting to set in
I go back and forth between feeling unable to improve my condition and wanting to do everything possible to connect with other people
Sticking it out sounds like the worst possible option but it's the only one I have; how are you hanging bros?

Find meaning outside of yourself of girls. I don't want to be a faggot Christ poster but I found God and have never felt better. I have true meaning in my life and I always strive for more. You have to find something that makes this life worth living. Even if you can't bang 8/10's or be the life of the party, or have heads turn at your figure you can still be happy. I believe in you user. I know that with enough hard work you WILL be happy and you WILL make it.

recently started using cronometer to count calories since not gaining weight at the rate I want to and it's been eye opening, allows you to add custom food and recipes as well would recommend for easy tracking

How the fuck do I open those .epub files you've posted in books if I'm on PC?

sumatrapdf reads epub

how to get social gains?

Whenever I read shit like this it kind of bums me out. Christians who converted due to depression/lack of fulfillment always seem to me to just be weak, desperate people looking for an idol to justify their existence. Being a Christian allows a person to feel value despite continuing a boring and unproductive existence, i.e. not really generating any value.
In fact, it's exactly a meager existence that is said to be more virtuous within Christianity.
At least the sullen and bitter are still operating within reality. They just don't like where they fit in.

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Fake confidence

If it gives you reason to continue moving forward, why not.

I never really converted out of lack of anything better to do or Jow Forums memes. I think it's the truth and ever since I decided to become a Christian my life has been improving. Im sure lifting and other self improvement stuff has also been responsible for my happiness too. Im just saying finding something higher than modern atheism and nihilism is better for your life. Again, I am not a Christian just because of self improvement stuff but because I believe it to be true and as a result my life is better and I have meaning.

Does anyone have the 7 day digital/social fast jpeg, with precise instructions and what not?

No-fap day two. I'm going for at least january 1 2020. My previous record was 140+, wish me luck bros.

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Good luck user

At least for me the realization that my conversion is essentially therapeutic would short circuit the whole operation, I would be kidding myself. And I can't do that with self-awareness.
Well good for you. I didn't mean that post as a personal attack, obviously I don't know anything about you beyond these two posts, it's just my perception. Personally I'm unable to see it as the truth.

Gym game strong. Diet game strong. Social life completely fucked. I go to the clubs and bars with my group of friends every weekend. Most of the time I just get too fucked to truly socialize. I think it’s because I have social anxiety, and get drunk as an excuse to avoid talking to people, while my friends all have great conversations. Help

Well you sound aware of the problem.
You have a few options as far as I can tell. The first is to seek therapy, can't vouch for that as I've never tried it. I'm sure you can do the research on this one.
The second is to make a conscious effort to not drink as much (have a little to drink tho, it helps) and try to talk to someone until you kill the anxiety associated with socializing. The most proven way to defuse anxiety and phobias in general is exposure. I'm not saying you should cold approach people, but if someone is involved in your social circle try to talk to them and work your way up from there.
Socializing is actually pretty easy. You just have to be comfortable and honest and you will naturally attract compatible people. If you bottle yourself up for fear of embarrassing yourself or not offending anyone you will never actually exude the personality necessary for anyone to like you.

Oh it's cool bro sorry if I misunderstood your post.

I'm a lawyer living in Brazil.
Just got a case of a rich aryan-looking minor who was contained accused of raping a student.

His initials literally spell C. H. A. D.

I know it's not the right place, but I just wanted to immortalize that.

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>If you need to put others down to feel good about yourself, you are putting yourself in a position where you are dependent on the people you look down on.

That's deep man.

>High iq because you're on Jow Forums
that's one low bar there buddy

checked, thanks fren

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Thanks, I’ll give it a shot!

>grew up poor, no electricity in the woods poor
>moved every few years, so never had/kept any friends
>in school was so strange(autistic) that even bullies didn't bother with me
>book smart, used to finish my school work in the first few minutes of class then wander around the school or reading in library
>had teachers jokingly tell me to let them know if I was going to shoot up the school
>dropped out sophomore year, spent two years alone in an apartment because my father was overseas in Iraq and my mother was in another state
>uncle came by every couple weeks for grocery runs, wonder what he thought about it, looking back
>got tricked by an Army recruiter, had a perfect ASVAB score but got pushed into a mid-range MOS
>washed out of the military in AIT, been moving every couple years since
>got into self-improvement, spent a few months doing keto and gymastics
>stumbled into some amazing friends, who helped me into some social situations
>five years of introspection later I found the end of my own personal philosophy
>for the past six months I have been at peace with everything
>asked a girl for the number last weekend
>heading to coffee with her today

Wish me luck.

en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Master–slave_morality
If you're interested

For the record I used to have the same problem. I would stay extremely close to my good friends and barely interact with everyone else. My first attempts at being more outgoing were really awkward and I had a few rejections. But using this escalation method I now make a pretty good impression on people and I'm well-liked at my usual haunts. I've also just about doubled the size of my friend group.

I’m glad you understand where I’m at. Since I’m in the military I’ve got quite a few friends since we’re always around each other and party at all the same places. both guys and girls. The girls are either not very attractive or someone I’ve know for a Long time. It’s the attractive women that make me extremely nervous. I’m 22, have a decent physique and every reason to be confident. I always freeze up. But I’ll for sure make an effort to ease my way into my next few interactions and see if I can improve.

Guy who posted the other link here. Also this:
en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Objet_petit_a
Always thought /sig/ would benefit from some literacy in psychoanalysis. After all, the mind exists within the body.

are you actually lifting? if not fucking start.

This thread is not about lifting fren.

Yeah I do. It’s one of the few times I actually feel like I achieve something when I finish a set.

Any tips on how to cope with a job I really hate, besides from quitting? It's one of the few stressors in my life, but is enough to drag me down so hard on some days I crack on my diet

>Learn to be Brutally Honest with yourself. Stop being a slave to your Ego.
Rly struggle with this one. I try to be humble but somehow I think I always kinda show off or try to get validated. What do anons.

Same here. Just moved back to the country i was born in and i have no friends. At least i have my extended family and sister here.

Good luck, user.

>friend and I walk around town on our days off since its free
>see cute girls all the time
>friend has idea of asking out a girl a day
>bro I swear its just a numbers game
>decide to humor him
>he gets 7 numbers in a row
>maybe he's onto something
>steel myself and ask out total stranger
>it works
>setting up a date for Independence Day
How the fuck do you date a stranger? I need some advice on this, I already feel like I'm gonna just waste my time and fuck it up somehow.

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I've been working on kicking my soda/sugary drink habit. In the last 2 weeks I've gone from often drinking 1-4 sodas/day to limiting myself to just 1 soda.
I've also been working on a habit where I eat my food way to fast and don't feel full when I'm done. I've been eating a lot less and am hopeful for the future.

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I know how this will sound. Travelling. Not to the center of major cities (they can be fun too but mostly it's all the same Disney land tourist trap)
I'm talking about the places they make desktop wallpapers of. The world is a really beautiful place, society is so fucked up but nature and the better parts of human nature (great architecture/history) have sights to offer that will make you feel, well, good.
If you want tips on how to do it cheaply, ask. I work food service and i manage 1 international trip a year.

Also exercise, but you already know that.

It gets better man, I love you and most people on this website, i was grew up with Jow Forums and feel more similar to you guys than anyone i meet irl.

Id like to disagree OP.

My parents have ruined my life.

Lately I've been focusing on how to improve my mental health at the cost of some of my other functions, like school. I've been watching a lot of Dr.Nerdlove's videos on YT, which are actually extremely helpful, at least for me.

So far mentally, within the past couple of weeks, I've learned to NOT see myself as inferior because I'm a virgin, although not seeing myself as lesser due to never having had a gf is a little harder.

I want to start with CBT but I don't know where to begin or if I should practice it with a therapist, which I don't have the money for.

I've been getting better and better at driving, so it's looking like I'll finally have my own car and a license by the end of this year, so going out and meeting people will be easier and easier for me.

Honestly right now, all I want is a close circle of guy friends who are either in a similar position to me or are sympathetic to my struggles. I want to build that sort of emotional connection that females do with their friends so that I can have a stronger social safety net to fall on. Too bad actually finding guy friends like that is difficult as fuck since we all view that sort of shit as gay as fuck.

All right /SIG/ I have a question. I feel like shit, drowning deep in apathy and despair, have a fucked up sleeping shedule and constant pains, stuck ina a dophamine trap; in fact I have probably never felt worse.

But I still have hope: In a short while I'm gonna go to mountains for three weeks to do some research (I'm a geology postgrad) without any internet connection - just me, wild nature, a couple of books and my research.

how do I maximize the potential benifit to my health and mental state?

I know that it sounds like a dumb and pathetic blogposting and spacing is retarded but I will truly appreciate any help

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The worst part is explaining to my parents how my 21st that they planned isn’t gonna happen anymore, since all my friends hate me (for good reason mind you). The fact that it’s the 8th birthday in a row that they have to hear “yeah actually no ones coming” just fucking kills me.
And one of my former friends just repeat called to berate me until I blocked him, and it kinda pushed me to buy the shit.
Sorry I’m starting to attention whore, I’ll stop.
End of blog.

I'm a schizoid that wants to change, with a long term goal of starting a family. I have a couple friends but not any I can physically hang out with without a plane ticket. The coworker situation right now is almost all women with a couple gays, and all the women are already in a relationship. We chat amicably but that's it. There's two people I click with more than the rest. If I'm going to try making a friend myself they're the most likely suspects. But we rarely work together and we're all pretty strung out and pressed for time working 2+ jobs. Do I just ask to hang out anyways? And where?

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Thanks senpai.
She turned out to be... pretty young.
But I'm seeing her again next week.

I've been hitting the gym much harder for the past 9 months than ever before. Mostly in the name of cosplay.

I just hit 210 lbs on my squat (for reps), which isn't super impressive on a place like Jow Forums (its about average there), but I'm pretty proud considering that I was squatting just 125 lbs back in November. I've made just as much progress on the benchpress, deadlift, and overhead press as well.

Commitment has been key. I just went thru a super hectic and busy move, and am pretty proud for not missing a single workout, no matter how busy or exhausting it got.

Don't do it user. Life is worth living. Look at what you loathe most. Your job, your body, your income.
Then think about why.
Then look for ways to either change the fact you hate or if the fact can't be changed try to change your mindset around it.
Life is suffering, but killing yourself is not the answer. Look to improve yourself and you will have some good times that make it all worth it
Good luck user

would it be bad to start telling myself i'm christian if I'm really unsure about the bible and God being the truth?

what I mean is that sometimes I go to my parent's church and i find the message really beautiful and uplifting but I just don't personally know if I believe that God is real, or that he wrote the Bible, or that Jesus was God

but besides for that, I love the idea of who Jesus was, and the idea of sacrifice and higher power and meaning to life.

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hey friend, i'm really sorry things aren't turning out for the party but please know that we love you.

people can do bad shit, i've done plenty and still do. i'm a little older than you and still make decisions that some people give me tons of shit for, but there are still things that i can appreciate that make days worth living. i could never consider suicide because i'm afraid of death more than I am of being unhappy in life, but i know how much you're hurting if you did this far.

just wanted to toss a hug at you buddy

While on your trip, make yourself physically exhausted everyday so that you're so tired at the end of the day it forces yourself to sleep well each night. Hike for hours, bike if you can, bodyweight workouts with trees and rocks or whatever around.

You'll be alright user. Lots of activity, time in nature, sleep, campfire, and don't forget to bring some healthy food. Catch and eat fresh fish if you can, that always help my mood. Good luck

Its called faith for a reason, gotta take a bit of a leap. If your parents go to church I'm sure you have a bible laying around in the house somewhere. Hopefully its in a dialect of your language thats readable to you. Start at the new testament, its when Jesus steps into the stage.
And remember that Christians are the worst part about Christianity, inherently.
And you don't have to call yourself Christian, don't box yourself into a label. Just pursue truth and you'll be fine

>Christians are the worst part about Christianity
Sounds like you're ashamed of being part of the church

Mine have come pretty close and continue to try. OP writes like we're completely immune to the actions of others.

A good sleep was needed user. I’ve cancelled the orders so I should get my money back as well.
The problem with me is I’m more worried about a shitty life than I am with death, so suicide seems like a nice option a scary amount of the time.
I think I’m still gonna kill myself, but I’m a more figurative nature. Maybe change my look, my attitudes, my job, my name (up to a certain point).
If it’s still shit after a while though, I think I will go the whole way.

I barely do anything except wasting time and procrastinating and I don't put effort in barely anything I do. How do I build discipline?

thank you!

Can I get some fitness advice? I'm a total beginner.

I'm 6"1, 25, and around 160 lbs. I'm skinny, but a bit skinny fat since after my breakup I started getting stoned all the time and eating munchies. Long story short, I'm not happy with my physique. My posture is also bad and my muscles are weak.

I want to get into shape, fix my posture, build muscle, etc. I can get a gym membership, but I'm not sure what to do when I'm there.

I've never lifted before. I'm also very introverted and don't have friends that can show me how.

When it comes to diet, I've been a vegetarian most of my life and still am, but I don't eat foods that are that good for me. I know I should look into decent sources of vegetarian protein, since I'm pretty sure I'm lacking there.

tl:dr – How do I put together a plan to put me in decent shape when I'm clueless about fitness and exercise? I wouldn't know what to do when setting foot into a gym

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How do I add more "weight" to my voice? I can handle conversation, but when I'm in a group and everyone's competing for eachother's attention, my voice feels neglectible.

good luck!! currently on day 2 as well, last record was 16 days. Already feeling the effects on me.