I'm feeling directionless and unmotivated. Any of you guys ever recieved advice that changed your life for the better?
What's the best advice you've ever been given?
Times heals everything
U dont have to be perfect,but better version of yourself
You are doing your best
Fake it til you make it. People smell insecurity and lack of confidence a mile away. Even if you have no idea what the fuck you're doing, tell people you do, and convince yourself that you can learn. I personally still have some imposter syndrome going into my final year of college but that has helped me have a new perspective on how to succeed in the world
Remember you aren't your thoughts and feelings
No, I don't think advice can fix me
There's a song called "everybody's free to wear sunscreen", which I highly recommend you listen to.
Really nice, user
John 14:15-27 ESV
"If you love me, you will keep my commandments.  And I will ask the Father, and he will give you another Helper, to be with you forever,  even the Spirit of truth, whom the world cannot receive, because it neither sees him nor knows him. You know him, for he dwells with you and will be in you.  "I will not leave you as orphans; I will come to you.  Yet a little while and the world will see me no more, but you will see me. Because I live, you also will live.  In that day you will know that I am in my Father, and you in me, and I in you.  Whoever has my commandments and keeps them, he it is who loves me. And he who loves me will be loved by my Father, and I will love him and manifest myself to him."  Judas (not Iscariot) said to him, "Lord, how is it that you will manifest yourself to us, and not to the world?"  Jesus answered him, "If anyone loves me, he will keep my word, and my Father will love him, and we will come to him and make our home with him.  Whoever does not love me does not keep my words. And the word that you hear is not mine but the Father's who sent me.  "These things I have spoken to you while I am still with you.  But the Helper, the Holy Spirit, whom the Father will send in my name, he will teach you all things and bring to your remembrance all that I have said to you.  Peace I leave with you; my peace I give to you. Not as the world gives do I give to you. Let not your hearts be troubled, neither let them be afraid.
Underrated question. Bump
I liked that a lot
I only discovered it recently, but it's one of my favorite songs. Even disregarding the quality of the advice, the way it's given I so soothing that when I listen to it, life doesn't seem so bad.
My life is full of people that inspired me, but I can't quite remember the exact ones by word.
So I'm gonna give some based on my own mindset
>being nice to the world does not always pay off, but it still feels good and helps those around you
>never reject critic and advice, work with it
>build your own ideal and perspective, it will give you direction
>negativity and positivity are both inevitable
>rambling getting upset and complaining about the unchangeable is pointless
>if you find a person that actually fits to you and you care about you shouldn't let go of them
>respect others as much as you respect yourself, core point of empathy
>accept there are different opinions
>life is too short to be negative
>do what you believe in
Going through a rough time rn but reading these gave me some optimism. Thanks
"You only get a few big chances in life, don't squander them"
Todd Rundgren - time Heals
going to post some
generally most of my life lessons that have somewhat sticked with me are not interpersonal. The amount of people you meet and actually give you deep advices is low.
My grandma and mother always told me to be more like myself, this isn't really original but over time you realize it bears value. You are you, you can't change that, better be comfortable with who you are and build on that. find out who you are as soon as possible, it will help you a lot.
my dad tought me that lying will always get back to you. While he just told me that to straighten me, I think it really is true to go the honest route most times, it saves you effort and it wont backfire as hard. And a buddy of mine additionally gave me the wisdom that you should always stand up for what you think.
a personal one that sticked with me is that no matter what kinda shit happens, soon afterwards it will be a memory, just one piece in the whole so dont be too scared of failing, effort, bad things or get hung up in the here and now like it will go on forever.
the best things in life are surprises too is a thing I always believed. And to me, value the people no matter who they are or what they do, they are what makes life worth living.
always second guess, yourself and others
and I know this one will sound bad but pessimism is better than optimism when you are about to look into the future. If your hopes are low you are either already prepared or you will be overwhelmed by an unexpected positive surprise. so it doesnt hurt to go with worst cases. But dont treat it as an absolute certified accurate vision, take it with salt, a way of preparation.
i might post som more if I remember some of the ones I got on the way of my (short) life. Generally speaking I think its accurate to say we only really start living that way of mindfullness past our teens. Most of your best advices and direction taking is probably yet to come OP
do not run away from reality just because it doesnt work well. This is something my brother made me realize. He'd always just screech and get upset at stuff not going his way. Sometimes shit happens and you have to accept it and roll with it. Dont let the media tell you that its hyper alpha to try and control everything, it will leave you insecure and defeated most of the time. But that shouldn't hold you off to try and have some will to act. But sometimes things just dont work out and this is how it is.
talk to people too. youll feel better with the right human connection. Also in general, dont ignore or supress who you are for things you dont believe or other stuff. I wasted my youth because of that fatal mistake.
Also really cool, a guy on a subway who was drunk told me on a day I slacked school about how important it is to fix yourself and have some discipline. It was crazy cause he just straight up walked up to me without any infos. He basically pointed out a few of my superficial flaws which gave me a bit of a push and I guess he was right. A real saint.
Also tough love is part of life, do ever hide from feelings. Thats something that fucks up relations, prominently the one of my father or one of my friends. It will bite you and burn bridges
>some people are meant to be alone
>you're one of them
>just accept it and move on.
My life has been exponentially more tolerable now
The past does not matter, it is a subjective experience. Treating subjective experiences as an objective truth of how the future will play out is utter nonsense.
Treating the past as an objective truth is a gateway to determinism, it denies our free will.
Make do with what you've got and always strive for improvement. Again, look at the future, not the past. Focus on your goals and how to achieve them.
If you go to a doctor and all he tells you how you got sick and how to avoid it, well that wouldn't help your current situation, would it? No, you require information on your goal, which is curing your illness.
how the fuck do you improve if you don't value past life lessons/experience?
Do not urinate off the side of a steep mountain. Updrafts...
A friend of mine and I were in the middle of some hellish social experience. He turned to me and quietly said "however much it sucks at the time, it'll make a good story later." I've taken that to heart and used some of these stories of awkedness and pain to make people laugh when I tell them. It's caused other people to open up and made me realise that a lot of people go through the same agonies, particularly when you are young.
The other advice I got was from a housemate. She was getting up early to go for a run, it was cold and raining like a bastard. When I said she was crazy, she said "you might as well go and do it now, it's not going to get any easier." It may hurt or be unpleasant, but the longer you leave it, the harder it will become to start something.
"[In public settings,] say less than you know and speak as little as possible while still being affable."
Wow. This is dumb.
The past is experience that will help you in the future. I guess you’re still a young teenager, or you would know.
When a friend in your circle is toxic, and being around them gives you anxiety and stress, you need to get them the fuck out of your life.
It sounds really obvious, but if you're dumb like me, it's life changing once you finally learn how to get rid of shitty people from your life.
Dont worry about it
Self awareness is the ultimate power.
That's why humans kept getting more and more conscious through evolution. Consciousness is a massive advantage.
Reflect and know thyself.
If I had an unborn son on the way and I was dying and could only scrawl down a few words for him that's what I'd write.
Let's look at it another way. Can a person struggling with anxiety because something that happened in the past, ever change? It's an experience yes, but does it help you in any way?
Is it not something the person gave meaning to? Why would something you gave meaning to be an unchangable reality?
How about treating the anxiety as a means to an end? The person has a certain goal to achieve, and then fabricates anxiety as a result of that goal. For example, a person with Anorexia Nervosa wants to be perfectly thin and so stops eating to achieve that goal. So should that person just accept this? Being aware of this, should they not make an attempt to change? Or is this set in stone and not bother because you can't change the way you are?
Always go to where you're treated best.
This too, shall pass.
Ask not the meaning of life, but what meaning life asks of you.
Ask yourself if being so angry is making your life better and whether or not your letting past experiences ruin your current life.
Helped me overcome my experiences with bullying, I slip back into anger and judgement now and again but I know it just drains me so I stop before it gets bad.
I actually feel pretty mellow most the time and now I get angry when I have to be around people who used to act like I did.