What advice would you have for a friend who can't seem to get a gf?

Tell him to just be confident and to rinse his penis.

This. Just become confident. It's not very hard.

You don't even have to be confidant. All you have to do is try. Even if you are meek and can't look her in the eye and stutter your chances of her saying yes when you ask her out are infinitely higher than the chances of her saying yes if you DONT ask her out.

>your chances of her saying yes when you ask her out are infinitely higher
This is the dumbest comment I've ever read.

And yet it is irrefutably true. Her odds of her answering yes if you never ask the question is 0%. Even if there is a 0.0001% chance then that is infinitely higher than no chance.

You have to master the arts of not giving a fuck, my son.

Once this is mastered, you will drown in pussy

>Just fix the issue lmfao

I like to see it as, I wish this bitch tells me no.

I'm gonna go up to her best friend and ask her next.

Im gonna try and fuck her mom too

Are you the type to spend your meager pay on lottery tickets?

Most men who fail with women fail at much more fundamental levels than approaching. Telling them to "just talk to her, bro" could not be less helpful. Tell them to go to the gym first if anything.

Wrong. Actually asking women out is THE most important thing you have to do. You still see morons on here saying "I am fit and rich and have a great face but I still have no girlfriend" To which the first response is "how many woman have you asked out" Surprise surprise when they say zero.

That shit is troll af. I cant imagine anyone who would live by those asshat rules lmfao

Yes but you cant do this if you dont give a fuck. In order to ask out any bitches you gotta not give a f or else you will be too much of a bitch yourself to be yourself

>Actually asking women out is THE most important thing you have to do.
This is great advice to turn a guy suicidal.

It's amusing to see how out of touch some people are from the people they take so much pleasure in mocking and berating. Go to the gym, get a job, get a car, move out and don't look at a woman until you do would be better advice.

Y'all got so much social adjustment to do. Like there's no way we can just "tell you" how to be socially acclimated to things. I don't even know where to start to begin; do I start with "the mentality that girls congregate in some sort of singular locations," or do I go at "you guys are bad at talking to anyone, period, not just women" or do I go to "you guys are too desperate for validation you can't provide yourselves" or do I start with "you guys aren't exactly going in with the intent to impress as much as just find someone who fits YOUR requisites" or do I start with "your constant solution to things is to defer to others rather than try yourself and fail," ......

I can go on, and on, and on. You guys are just so... backwards. Maybe it's that you've lived in the internet and the age of instant gratification. Maybe you were abused or bullied. Maybe you're just wired that way, or maybe you're stuck in a teenager mindset because you've never stepped up like an adult ought...

What I can say for sure is that for 90% of you, therapy is the only answer. You each need someone dedicated to listening to your story and helping you with it-- but you CANNOT expect your lover to be that person, as it is entirely unsustainable and dooms a relationship before it starts.

Just bee yourself man :)

Guys u not listening. Listen, black people dont have cars, money, jobs anything but they always have at least 5 baby daddies. Its cause when they high af, they dont give a f.

Thats it my white trash bros. Im giving you the answer in a silver spoon.

Learn what your wants and desires are, and shit on them so that you are a more effective person. Lastly, understand the purpose of this is to be a nicer better person, not a cunt

Trust me guys, ive been pretty successful in my life, especially at getting women in my home

It'd be easier to say that you don't know.

The only thing it takes is to not give a fuck, all of that is just stupid jabber. Too much thinking

Being socially adept only takes that one thing. Not caring about your want and desires and understanding that your mind placed on them will attract energy that isnt you

This guy right here. Learning to not give a fuck alows you to be yourself. Bitches loveeeee this... no matter how fucking broke you are lmao i promise

>just be black bro
There are very different standards for different races and "types" of people.

If someone who is the physical manifestation of a 90's nerd followed your advice, he would face nothing but pain and rejection in his life. An extremely attractive dudebro would follow your advice and never run out of pussy.

These guys give so many fucks they're on Jow Forums. Look at our frontpage; it's like half "buh buh no GF." Jesus Christ man, these kids need therapy.
I do know. They need therapy and extensive help because they've locked themselves behind anxiety and stress about the simplest shit. Most people don't give so much of a fuck what randos think and these guys are apoplectic about the idea of a girl saying "no" to a date. It keeps them from ever even approaching them. They build up all these "what ifs" and it's like, you aren't even at the sex stage. What-if it when you get to sex-having, that's when stakes get high.

Being so frightened of reactions that you won't even ask a girl out for a cup of coffee, though? I-- we-- can't help. They need professional, certified help.

I give so few fucks that I don't even talk to women, though. It hasn't worked.

Kek

That's solid advice but still the question was about where could you even meet women and not about being frightened of rejection.

Kill yourself, but unironically.

A year ago I didn't have a car and lived with my parents. Had a girl been completely infatuated with me, these two factors alone would have ruined any chances. Basic things have to be in place before you go after women.

No man. There are plenty of broke pieces of shit that have fine as fuck girlfriends. Has nothing to do with it. Your personality just lacks coming out, so you need that shit to turn a womans attention

Thats the wrong direction obviously. I can take advice, create a retarded blown out of proportion excuse and make it not work also

Jerk off and get your sexual frustration out then come back with your normal shitty mind set instead of the pimple faced one

>where could you even meet women
just make an tinder you dumb incel

I've done that and got zero dates out of it. Any other ideas?

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Become attractive, retard. Holy fuck

just don't be such a desperate, creepy incel.

I don't understand how you're supposed to start a conversation with a woman and keep her interested while simultaneously not caring about her at all.
Also I'm trying to get rid of the acne. No need to remind me.

>wall of text
>still no concrete answer
lmao

Because the reason you cannot get a woman is because you are afraid of losing her.... your desire to hve the woman creates a fear of losing her so then all your conversation becomes catered behind this fear your mind has a hard time moving away from

Because fear is the strongest attacthment your mjnd can bind on to.

You hve to find reasons to not give a fuck to liberate your awareness from being placed on shit that will attract shit

Liberating yourself from fear and being a little bitch will allow you to be you because your mind is not placed on what you shouldnt say because you dont give a fuck about losing her... you end up just talking about things you like

And if you lose her you will be content that she shouldnt have even been with you anyway if she was not going to like you

You rather burn the fucking bridge down now than be tryig and sweating for years and the bitch making you beg for a text back trust me

>Where do I meet girls
>[Wall of text with no answer]
I'm not asking for a gf to materialize in my bedroom, I really just have no idea where a single guy goes to meet women. There's obvious stuff like a bar/club on the weekends, although I find that people only go there in groups so getting to know anyone is a challenge, but where else can you go

>Unironically directing someone asking for dating advice to Tinder
This board is such a joke, just a bunch of out of touch boomers shitting on people while having no real advice beyond "Just be yourself, fix your problems and pull yourself by your bootstraps"

The problem stems from trying to be someone else because of fear of losing her in the convo

So you then need to work out and do all sorts of dumb shit when all the other regular things worked from the beginning. But its all good, im happy with my pussy

This is my biggest problem too. I go out to bars, I talk to women there but it never goes anywhere. I use use it as practice. My problem isn’t my personality entirely but I’m lowkey pretty ugly thanks to genetics. Other than that I don’t really have a friend group to hang out with, so I hang out with either of my two buddies and they don’t really know any women either.

I’m thinking of trying volunteering somewhere or trying to go to as many public events as I can. Tinder doesn’t work for me, given it too many tries already.

This is one of the greatest things I have ever read on this board

It takes practice. Im quite phenomenal at at this point

When you finally get it, if you are lucky enough to, wish I could picture your dumb face telling someone to be themselves

Are you though? Is it really a skill you can learn?

I plan on trying to go out to meet women when I get a car but just thinking about approaching groups of women who probably want nothing to do with me makes me anxious.

It absolutely is a skill you can learn and improve, don't listen to the incels. Real improvement comes from systematic and deliberate practice, though. You can't just go up to woman after woman and expect to magically get better. You have to start paying attention to how she's reacting, what behaviors have what effects, and analyzing your performance afterward.

Source: went from khhv at 26 to being able to bang different women every night. Had to systematically figure out everything about socializing pretty much from scratch, and am now consistently mistaken for a normal person.

>just thinking about approaching groups of women who probably want nothing to do with me makes me anxious
Then you probably shouldn't jump right in to the deep end, buddy. Start slow. Learn how to have an engaging conversation with a stranger. Learn how to become a fun new addition to an established group at a bar. Learn how to talk to a woman alone, then in a pair, then in a group.

I've said it before, but we need a /sgg/ - social gains general thread. People need to learn to walk before they try to run. Like a 90-day Starting Social challenge. Day 1 you have to make eye contact with 1 person on the street, day 90 you have to have an engaging conversation with 5 different strangers. People report on their progress in the thread, and graduates have enough of an understanding of meeting new people to actually get somewhere when learning to meet women.

holy shit this resonated with me though. Thx user for putting my feelings into words

>Learn how to become a fun new addition to an established group at a bar.
How? I'm very morose in groups.

Also, are you attractive at all? Height?

>meet new girls
>hey where do I meet new girls?
>omg we can't JUST (((((tell you)))))))
>also you're a loser teen with self esteem issues just for asking that
the absolute state of this "''"advice""""" board lmao

back to r9k with you, loser

It's easier for normies to feel better about themselves by pointing, laughing, and calling undesirables names than actually helping them. Just the way things are

You'd be surprised how many emotionally empty girls there are.
I met mine because I knew her from school, but she was basically a neet with only one friend that was forced to look after her ill mother.
She was very happy when I reunited with her and honestly all I did was try to cheer her up and before I knew it she wanted to get together.
She was super depressed and I helped her improve her life.
Honestly, I was only looking to score but I ended up really caring about her after we shared our life experiences with each other.
Literally just talk and listen to girls who feel alone, it works out pretty well since they feel like your looking after them.

That's a cruel view of things. These people are "just backwards"; their brains are miswired and that makes them malfunction. Put them in a room with a Mental Mechanic and let the Professional do their job - rewire and fix their bad brains. In this worldview, the idea that there are people whose more-or-less natural way of being has been rejected by society is impossible. If you don't seem to find external validation, the problem isn't with the externality but with you. You are broken, a deviation from how humans are supposed to behave ("socially acclimated"), and you desperately need fixing.
Only once you've been fixed - turned into a different, but correct, person - only then you deserve to find the human contact you crave and need.

Therapy is expensive, and, while I can't speak for others, it didn't work with me. If you are reading this and are struggling with shit, go ahead and give it a try, but for me it's been a waste of both time and money. Because - news flash! - not even the best therapist in the world can teach a person on how to socially connect with other humans, for the same reasons why you can't cure autism. Therapists are only there to serve as a sort of mental mirror and outlet for you. They may prod you in what they think is the right direction, but the change they try to incite must come from within you.
Sorry if it sounds obvious and unhelpful, but the fact is that if you cannot change, you are wasting your time trying.

Acceptance is key, and for many, validation is an integral part of acceptance. But for cruel people like , validation may only come only after a state of "mental health" and "social acclimation" have been achieved. You must first first be shaped into, well, a normie, and only then you can expect to find friends. But for most people here, it's putting the cart before the horse. How can you get better at talking if you never talk? How can you dare to try if failure has such massive mental costs?

No one is berating them, I know exactly what it feels like to be so anxious you want to be sick.
BUT st some point you've literally gotta tell yourself you need to do this, man up and ask "that" girl out.
I do however feel its important to have an established relationship with her, even if its just surface level, don't just ask a complete stranger out.

That guy is right; there's something wrong with you people. It's bad enough we have to share existence with you people. You want us to accommodate you as well. Fuck off or get better.

Have sex

Don't bother. I thought it was important to have GFs and wasted my whole twenties and all my money. Had a bunch of relationships with women that all eventually ended, leaving me just more jaded and broken. I've got an ex wife and three kids and no money.

Women are a meat grinder that will destroy your life. I wish someone had the balls to tell me that back when I was kissless.

>Source: went from khhv at 26 to being able to bang different women every night
Fuuuuck, man, I'm 26 years old and this shit has been fucking with me for awhile now.

And for what it's worth, I want to start learning how to approach and talk to strangers and whatnot, but I feel like I need a car first to transport myself around.

Having a car and a job is basically required. Most women worth talking to won't settle for less.

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>How? I'm very morose in groups.
It's hard to explain precisely, but the idea is that you do two things - 1) bring more energy in that you take out. If it's a fairly slow, quiet group, come in as a positive and upbeat, and if it's loud and boisterous, come in like a fuckin' hurricane. 2) engage with the conversation. If someone's telling a story, laugh loudly at the right points, and interject appropriately - "Now way!" "Wow!", "Then what happened?", etc. If you're telling a story, make eye contact, get more animated, vary your tone of voice, make funny asides, etc.

Of course, as I said, take it slow. You don't have to start experimenting on random groups at the bar. Try to edge closer to the centre of attention in a group of people that already know you (if you have one). Or practice that kind of engagement (also called active listening) in a one-on-one conversation.

>Also, are you attractive at all? Height?
Pale skinnyfat mutt w/glasses, 5"9', brown hair, brown eyes, bulbous blackfella nose, skinny as fuck wrists, can't even grow a beard to hide my shit-tier jawline. Doesn't matter. When I was underconfident women told me I "look like an engineer" (fuck, that one still hurts), when I became experienced and confident women said I was "handsome", "gorgeous", "hot", "perfect", etc (you'd better believe I mentally catalogued every single compliment).

Bull. Fucking. Shit. Social acclimation is literally just that - acclimation. The only problem with these people is that they're trying to do too much, too fast.

>How can you get better at talking if you never talk?
Start with one word - hello. Once you can say that, add more. Progressive overload, same as weightlifting.

>How can you dare to try if failure has such massive mental costs?
You think normies never went through rejection - you're wrong. They've been through so much more than you have. The first time it hurt them, the hundredth time it didn't. The only way out is through.

Been working for the past few years or so, so I'm good on that front. Still working on getting a car though. I have enough money but I haven't driven enough to feel comfortable having a license yet.

Go out together with me and I'll introduce you to so many girls you can't help but get a gf.

This guy is correct. GFs are a total waste of time and money. Casual sex is great though. All the validation, none of the cost, and the skills you learn pursuing it will serve you well into the future, as basically all successful life paths require some amount of networking/sales/charisma skill. Convincing women to sleep with you and then convincing them to leave on good enough terms that you can sleep with their friends is perfect for developing your social skills, as it's got nature's most effective reward system built-in.

If you're just learning to talk to strangers you don't necessarily need a car. The other dude's right about needing a car and a job for maintaining a relationship with a worthwhile woman, but frankly you're probably not at the 'maintaining a relationship' stage of your social skill development journey.

Sidenote: Travel if you can. Hostels are basically Tutorial Island for social skills.

Cars are overrated, maintenance and insurance costs are ludicrous in the states, women don't care though. Women like luxury and expect a man to provide it.

>This guy is correct.
>The other dude

Same guy

>If you're just learning to talk to strangers you don't necessarily need a car. The other dude's right about needing a car and a job for maintaining a relationship with a worthwhile woman, but frankly you're probably not at the 'maintaining a relationship' stage of your social skill development journey.
How do I get out there without reliable transportation though?

Too poor to travel btw.

>Women like luxury and expect a man to provide it.
Yup. It's like living with your parents. I'm saving a shit ton of money this way but no one cares because they want a man who lives on his own or at least away from mom and dad.

>How do I get out there without reliable transportation though?
Are you living in a rural area or something? Do you not have bus or train services? All I'm proposing is that you go to a populated area and make conversation with strangers to practice socialising. Worry about how many betabux you're pulling in after you know you can reliably hold an engaging conversation with a stranger.

>Too poor to travel btw.
Fair enough. Don't feel the need to go overseas though, staying in a hostel the next town over will be basically as effective for social gains.

> they want a man who lives on his own or at least away from mom and dad
This is true as far as it goes, but I'd hate to think you were using these factors as an excuse to avoid starting the painful work of learning to socialize. If you're worried about what a hypothetical woman is going to think about your income and living situation, before you've even talked to her, I daresay you're thinking too far ahead. In any case, for casual encounters you can always pull the "Oh I'm only in town for a few days, crashing on a friend's couch, let's go to your place", or "My penthouse apartment overlooking the river is being fumigated, is your place nearby?"

>How do I get out there without reliable transportation
You don't.

Bide your time. Focus on yourself. Women will come to you much easier later in life when you didn't piss away your time and money on trivial shit.

All the Chads will be married off and broke, all the women will be looking for the guy who has his shit together.

This 'bide your time and focus on yourself' advice is not necessarily great. Social skills are a massively important part of a successful life. I saved money, studied hard, got a PhD, a car, a place to live, and 100 grand in the bank, but absolutely no prospects in life going forward because I never fucking talked to anyone and didn't realize that what you know is fucking worthless compared to who you know.

Obviously you shouldn't be drinking your whole paycheck or lavishing thots with diamond jewelry, but treating proper socialization as something that you can just put off indefinitely is insanely unhealthy. If you've spent years in monk mode you'll just end up crazy and alienated, and you'll be forced to learn or relearn basic social interactions from scratch if you want to actually move forward in life. Fucking trust me on this one.

>you've spent years in monk mode you'll just end up crazy and alienated

oshit, ...

look as good as you can (be a healthy weight/muscular, brush your teeth, good haircut, etc).

Approach 5 girls a week. Rinse and repeat until you get numbers.

Success rate will be around 1%. So out of 100 approaches that'll result in probably 10 phone numbers, which will result in 5 dates, out of which one of those five will probably fuck

>where do I meet girls?
>for 90% of you, therapy is the only answer.
Wew lad

>Are you living in a rural area or something? Do you not have bus or train services? All I'm proposing is that you go to a populated area and make conversation with strangers to practice socialising. Worry about how many betabux you're pulling in after you know you can reliably hold an engaging conversation with a stranger.
Alright, maybe I'll try that in a few weekends.

Damn, thanks user.

>Alright, maybe I'll try that in a few weekends.
Also, what do I start with? What's a good "in" with how to start conversations?

I'm down for this. Jow Forums deletes those threads and this general is full of 14 year olds. We need a thread to bridge the gap.

Okay, I'm in therapy. What's the next step for getting a date? I don't think I can date my therapist.

It depends on a lot of things user, like you said different people become socially anxious for different reasons. What Ive concluded from a lot of cases is unless you have an inherent mental disorder it boils down to poor socialization during early stages of a person's development. The situation can worsen if you've had bad experiences or a lack of experiences growing up in a pretty small location with a small population of individuals with a similar background and then you throw this person out in the real world. This problem starts during high school, you'll start to notice which students are on a direct course to being outcasts as adults. Once you're an adult and have to face the big world we live in and dont have a network for support you'll find yourself with a very significant disadvantage.

does he want to get some specific girl he likes or does he only want to get his dick wet?

this.

the current girl im talking to is literally one of the hottest latinas you may ever meet. literally perfect tits, beautiful face, awesome personality, and tons and tons of attention from guys.

i found her on tinder after using a boost. she gave me her snapchat and then snapchatted me later at night.

i snapped her back a little bit and then called her over snapchat. she answered, we talked. my entire mentality when we talked was "just have fun, flirt, this is just practice"

now she likes me the most of all the guys she talks to. literally because i called her that one night.

she calls me to ask me to come to her place and cuddle with her. she just likes being near me. i don't push for sex at all, because i geniually enjoy being around her. its kind of fucked up, but now i know how to sell myself on the dating market.

do u smash tho

Has your friend considered masturbation?

No?

>Y'all
Stop appropriating Dixie culture

why don't you go and lose a war about it you crybaby

Have sex

Stop making a fuss about it

Don’t bother, it’s not worth it OP. Girls only bring pain and trouble

dont talk about what you like too much, dont talk about politics or what makes you mad in a joking manner. Dont make jokes at anyones expense. wear form fitting clothes nothing too tight or too baggy. And make your face look good...

Be persistent and don't give a fuck. It took me three years of online dating to finally get a girlfriend. I asked out probably 200+ girls, went on almost 30 dates, I got stood up and flaked numerous times, I cold-approached women at the mall, I failed over and over again. But I didn't give up.

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nice trips but you cannot put yourself through that and think of it as a normal ordeal

something is very wrong if a guy has to do all that

How many people live in your city? I feel like word would get around quick in a city with 100k people.

For a friend? Plenty. For a sperg like you I've got nothing

I'm not American. Stop doing cringe stuff like saying "y'all" when you aren't from the southern USA.