Trapped in abusive situation

I know this may be a terrible place to ask for real advice and I'm doing it anyway because I have no friends or family capable of listening or caring.

I'm diagnosed with bi-polar disorder, anxiety disorder and PTSD.

I have no vehicle and I'm stuck in an area with no public transportation. I have no money or any way to obtain gainful employment.

I've been unemployed and trapped in this situation currently for over a year.

The only time I'm allowed to leave the house is when someone drives me to and from my doctor, once every six weeks.

I stay locked in a room 90% of the time, my family is emotionally abusive and barricading my door is the only way to avoid the constant screaming and fighting.

I don't even know how I'm supposed to change my life. It's literally this place or homelessness.

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Well look, for one, you're a goddamn human being, not a series of labels.
Second, you do have a few options. Halfway houses, peace corps, etc.
Third, if you go homeless you can dig yourself out of it as long as you dont spend like a retard

Sounds horrible desu, where do you live? A girl I knew had the same issues as you. Ranging from the diagnosed disorders to the abusive family. Life situations can change quickly, depending on the country you live in. I'm hoping that it's not some third world hellhole

I have some time on my hands for the next couple of months. If you want to, then hit me up on insta (@arianbphoto) Maybe we can be friends. I like getting to know people from around the world. If not, then Godspeed on your journey and hopefully a better life situation in the future.

Embrace what you can't change and try your best to change whatever is possible for you.

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I don't understand how being homeless is any better, living in the woods pulling food out of dumpsters isn't going to get me anywhere.

I constantly feel hopeless and my only option is back in the hospital.

Talk to your doctor about what is going on and ask them to help you.

Whenever my doctor asks me how I'm doing, all I can ever say is, "I'm fine." I don't even know how to explain my fucked up situation, and he only ever seems to care about my meds and checking my blood.

I just clam up when people are trying to talk to me, like I'm horrified they'll judge me for basically being retarded.

He's there to help you. It is his job.
Just tell him what is going on and ask him for help on how to fix it: who you should talk to, etc.
It won't fix itself if you sit in your bedroom and don't do shit.

It's a horrible state clinic. They sent a job placement counselor to my house once who was about 70 years old to try and help me make a resume, you could tell this guy hadn't been on a job interview in a decade...

I don't even know how to explain to these people that I have no form of reliable transportation and horrible personal skills and emotional damage. No employer would touch me with a ten-foot pole, even if I could find a way to commute.

Everytime I've managed to get a job before, I struggle to get a ride for a month or so before I just get fired anyway.

>A girl I knew had the same issues as you. Ranging from the diagnosed disorders to the abusive family.

Can you tell me how she got out of it?

You need to contact CPS if you are a minor, Emergency rooms, Mental hospitals, or 911 if it is as bad as you are describing it. After finding help and a safe place to stay you should try and get a retail job or something like that. It may take years for you to get out of a foster but it's worth it, when you get enough money to buy a studio apartment or something just do it as long as you are financially stable, food stamps, shelters and charity shops are good to stay on your feet, as long as you keep going strong and get yourself out of that you will be safe. Go to College, even if that is a community one, you need higher education to get the best out of life.

This is a shitty advice for someone with PTSD. The doc should be more insisting about telling something, than this guy about getting helped. If he is diagnosed this way, than it´s ridiculous of the doctor to just check blood and meds. Such milkdrinkers never learn to treat people properly. This guy or woman has an anxiety problem. Telling to just talk about it will not help, if there is the anxiety problem.

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I'm not a minor, and I feel like it would be easier if I was.

I've been thinking for a while that my only option is to admit myself to the mental hospital again, the emergency room won't even bother unless you're suicidal or being physically assaulted.

I'm not suicidal, I want to live, I just don't want to be trapped and miserable.

I've been in mental hospitals several times before, and as long as I take my meds and stay quiet, nobody really notices me, there are always a few people way worse than everyone else who are constantly doing psychotic nonsense and keeping the nurses busy.

The food is terrible, and occasionally they let me outside, but at least nobody comes screaming at me and making me feel like shit every day, and not having transportation or money isn't a problem anymore.

I really want to live a normal life, and I just can't understand how.

You can't hurt yourself, you need to go to hospital. Tell them everything if it's that bad.

Shit. Call the cops.

The last time I was admitted to the mental hospital, I told my family I was feeling suicidal, they called the cops, the cops arrived, tased me and 3-4 tackled me to the ground leaving scars all over my face. Then the EMS crew injected me with ketamine and I almost died in the ambulance on the way to the hospital.

I'm fucking horrified of police, it didn't help my PTSD at all...

Not great at researching, then.
E-commerce is a thing now. You could be a freelance VA for example. Theres huge money in it if you maneuver right and build your portfolio. Then you can get out of where you are.

Then drive to the hospital and admit yourself

I did NOT Read the whole thing.


Wtf. What shithole you from?

>Injected with ketamine and almost died
Ketamine can't kill you. It's an excellent anesthesia when no life support is around. Like in an ambulance.
You sure you're not telling us stories here?
My ex was bipolar and she had all sorts of stories for her friends about how I beat her and threaten to kill her and made her afraid every day of her life.

this is in America, a shitty red state where they don't believe in mental health care

another time the police came to my house, my family tried to tell them about my condition, the officer literally told them "I don't believe in PTSD" and I got scared and ran away, the asshole called in dogs and helicopters to look for me...

After all this, my family figures I'm pretty much useless and when they aren't flat out ignoring me, they are telling me what a piece of shit I am...

How old are you? Can't you drive to another state?

runaway as far as you can go, then go further. no one has good job skills, they are just bullshit artists. lie cheat steal what ever you can. even jail might treat you better.

>Ketamine can't kill you.
I was having a completely fucked up psychedelic trip from it, so I have no idea what happened. The paramedic came to check on me in the hospital and told me I had a reaction and he was worried.

The doctor told me I definitely shouldn't be given it again, ever.

I'm 34, I've been dealing with this my whole life. I can't even leave the county right now. When I got scared and ran from the cops, the court pressed charges (evading), and my lawyer explained my condition and they agreed to drop the charges only if I do 1 year "community supervision", essentially probation.

I can't even make this shit up. It makes me so miserable, I hate being alive.

>runaway as far as you can go, then go further.
This is basically on my mind, every day... if I could flee to another country and never come back. I have no money. In America it's basically illegal to be poor in public...

Thank you everyone, I really appreciate your advice and being able to vent anonymously.

It really feels hopeless and I may check myself back in the hospital. I don't think I could handle being trapped here any longer or living on the street paranoid every day about getting taken by the police.

Maybe the best I can hope for is some kind of long-term psychiatric facility.

Are you a Woman?

I wish I was. At least someone would care.

You would be off in europe.

Don't think I don't know. It makes me even more depressed.