After high school I lost 90 lbs. I got really fucking pretty. I was bullied and treated like shit all my life. Had people make fun of me on social media, beat me, make fun of me every day in school. Now everyone treats me like I'm some sort of pretty princess, even my bullies. It gets me so fucking mad and the thought of dating a guy who wouldn't even have looked at me twice if I was fatter infuriates me.
How do I deal with it? I sincerely thought about setting up a dating profile with my fat photos and see who hits me up, lol.
because fatties are worthless and ought to be shamed. You've noone but yourself to blame for being a lard ass.
Benjamin Hughes
It's no different than the insecure people being jelly that you're cute now. Hatred is hatred. You need to let go and find new friends+partners.
Andrew Edwards
Same situation here. It really irritates me when people treat others differently because of their looks. I'm in my 30s and it's still something I struggle with. I dont like it when I know someone is treating me differently because of my looks, good or bad. I want the person who I end up with to look past my looks but I know this wont happen. It's how people are, its life. Accepting it makes it a lot easier.
Angel Rogers
I'm barely 110 lbs, dude.
I'm really scared that I'll end up with someone who would despise me if I wasn't thin. It drives me nuts. Every time a guy makes a joke about someone's appearance I just cringe.
Alexander Campbell
>A woman's value to a guy is mostly based on her physical attractiveness >Being fat makes you ugly. >Being ugly makes you worthless in the eyes of men How difficult is this concept?
Adam Gutierrez
There are guys who don't care too much about looks (within reason). You're just gonna have to be that much more discerning. Take things slow with a guy and truly get to know him.
Asher Lee
I get the concept, and it infuriates me. I don't want to spend my life with someone who loves me conditionally, or even worse who would have been one of the bullies I had in high school. I don't want someone to date me mostly because I'm pretty.
Grayson Carter
Contrary to believe, you can judge a book by its cover. A healthy person shows good qualities in a person at a mere glance. Fat and unhealthy people show bad qualities at a glance. Its perfectly natural to be disgusted by fats and envious of fits.
There is no debunking this. It's simple logic.
Kayden Adams
Any dating tips?
Jeremiah Phillips
You can't. I'll tell my 90 lbs friend who does coke and throws up all her meals that she's showing good qualities.
Henry White
>I don't want to spend my life with someone who loves me conditionally Welcome to the real world OP.
In Disney movies, men and women love each other unconditionally and with undying loyalty. In the real world, love is conditional and it only applies when it suits us. In fact, love HAS to be conditional.
If a particular guy you like didn't fullfil certain expectations you have of him, you wouldn't fall for him in the first place. The same way most guys won't fall in love with a girl who weighs 200+ pounds simply because it doesn't stimulate our dopamine system the way a hot girl does.
Benjamin Parker
>Thinking people don't shows signs of doing drugs That is the most excuse I get all the time and it doesn't work. People who do drugs or excessive amounts of alcohol will show it in them.
Andrew Robinson
>It gets me so fucking mad and the thought of dating a guy who wouldn't even have looked at me twice if I was fatter infuriates me. If a guy you used to know who was fat and smelly and unpopular later become trim, good looking, hygienic and popular, would the idea of dating him not seem more appealing to you?
Sexuality fundamentally has some shallow elements to it.
At least you could get pretty. Some of us are ugly for life no matter what we do.
Connor Smith
Watch “insatiable” on Netflix. It is your exact storyline. It will guide you
Julian Wilson
This is true you can easily determine healthy vs unhealthy dumb versus smart, used up whore vs debt free virgin with no tattoos
Michael Ramirez
Yes welcome to shallow society. If you really think girls arent capable of the same thing youre so far gone not even losing your weight could save you. Welcome to showing all your insecurities. Just actually take care of yourself and you will be fine.
Ian Turner
lol you should see what ugly men go through every day.
you had the opportunity to improve your looks by losing weight. ugly men are just ugly and are treated the way your old fat self was treated, but for their entire lives.
Be thankful that you were born a woman and that you weren't born inherently ugly, you simply had weight problems which you thankfully got under control.
Joshua King
All you are is a vagina. You used to be a fat vagina that stunk, now you are a used vagina that stinks even worse. You will probably die alone because you are used, approaching expiration and have an attitude and entitlement. Have fun with your cats
Ian Edwards
Not really. Maybe to find someone similar. But I've noticed guys who used to be fat are assholes a lot of the time. They internalise all the past insults and pay it forward to new fat ppl. It''s not like there's places specifically to find non judgemental people who are attracted mostly to personality over looks. It's just a matter of trial and error and having very high standards when it comes to personal character of others.
Austin Foster
That's probably because shaming eventually worked on them and they're trying to replicate that success in others.
Eli Torres
I'm a 21 year old virgin.
Gabriel Miller
ha ha ha fatty
Liam Morris
I don't think girls are better, but I don't need to get in a relationship with them. I don't want someone who wants to fuck me because I'm pretty and doesn't see any other value in me.
John Gutierrez
>I don't want to spend my life with someone who loves me conditionally, or even worse who would have been one of the bullies I had in high school. I don't want someone to date me mostly because I'm pretty. Ok so you have values and that's why it's important to go on dates to sort this shit out. You now know a new requirement for your future husband.
People value looks though and just because you were fat in the past doesn't mean you should let that define your dating life now. Physical attractiveness is like the cover charge to get into a club. You're essentially complaining that before you were not able to pay the cover before and now you can. But you're worried that people will only dance with you for your money. There's a vague sense of truth in it, people don't know your past and the people you're dancing with will likely value a certain amount of wealth because of the pool you're selecting from. However if you talked to them for like, five to ten minutes you'd find out quickly if that was the case.
Consider your physical beauty value, value to be added to the other things that make up yourself for your total amount of value. Before you talk to someone and get to know them, all they can see of your value is exactly that, what they can see. Unfortunately, MOST if not all people you will date will be attracted to you for your looks, not your personality, at least at first, because they don't know you yet and cannot see what else about you is valuable. You're just going to have to get over it.
Christian Harris
>I don't want someone to date me mostly because I'm pretty. Attractiveness is very important in starting a relationship, true, but that's not why someone should stay in said relationship. They would stay (and ultimately decide whether to commit to marriage) because of who you are--although incidentally this is more difficult these days, where people sleep around with impunity.
