How do you handle rejection?

I know the common credo is "nothing personal kid, move onto the next one" but how can you NOT take it personally? The girl is rejecting YOU. Not someone else. YOU. There is something wrong with YOU that she does not want to be associated with romantically.

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Give me sauce and I'll give you advice.

Just accept she ain't into u it's not her fault

You’re looking at it as if it’s some type of destiny shit.
As if you’re somehow incomplete without them.

That’s a horrible way to look at it.
Relationships aren’t about feeling like you found some cosmic soulmate, they are about partnership. You got their bad, they got yours and you do the best you can to make sure both of you are satisfied.

I do believe in true love, so don’t get me wrong...but frankly sometimes you can want something so fucking bad and not even realize it’s toxic for you. Kinda like an addict.

You shouldn’t take rejection personally because it’s not that you’re not good enough for them, it’s that they already know what piece they need and you’re just not it. It’s more of a selfish this...you get rejected because they know you’re not right together and they respond in a selfish way. Having them throw you a bone will just hurt because of the attachment.

Look at it this way, they said no, because they don’t want to waste either of your time...and honestly you shouldn’t waste your time trying to figure out what’s wrong with you.

When you find someone to connect with, you won’t even feel like you’re being judged or having to jump through hoops, and that’s the relationship you want. Rejection is just a reality check.

It’s better to find someone that likes you for who you are than change who you are for someone who doesn’t even appreciate you.

It’s ok to feel a little pissed about being rejected, but don’t take it to heart, it really doesn’t mean anything important.

Swallow your ego.

Idk I've never been rejected

Girl I've been in love with. Told her how I feel, she doesn't feel the same, only sees me as a friend.

No, I won’t make out with you!

Nd it's not urs

Or, she's just into fat dudes and you're not fat.
Or she's into skinny dudes and you're not skinny.
Or she's swedish/german and you're not a "14 year old" bearded refugee with a bunch of mates to help please her.

Different strokes for different folks.

Look mate, if a girl dates losers, guys who beat her, druggies, you know, then take that rejection as a fucking compliment mate because she likes to fuck assholes more than you would.
It'd be more of an insult if she wanted to suck your dick at that point.

Doesn't always mean there is something wrong with you, sometimes she has shit taste, or you just aint her flavor of guy.

Hope this helps.

That's strangely arousing

>You shouldn’t take rejection personally because it’s not that you’re not good enough for them, it’s that they already know what piece they need and you’re just not it
I'm failing to see how you cannot take this personally. "They know what piece they need and YOU'RE just not it" Therefore there's a deficiency in your character/appearance that doesn't appeal to them.

Same old song and dance.

You fucked up by being friendly first.


What’s the point of a date?
To get to know the person better...like a friend would...

But you don’t fuck your friends, stop trying to be a friend. Be a guy, and express interest, and then get to know them during dates.

Holy moly, I think dudes these days were raised by movies than raised by actual fucking people.

Kinda jaded, but true

Idk. She is saying, "you aren't fit to breed [with me]." Of course I'll take it personally, and is why I refuse to stoop to that level. I'd rather die with an untainted record and alone than to waste my time and energy to find out from women something that I already know; that I'm unattractive.

Idk, just keep being friends then. Unless you were only friends with her because you wanted to fuck her, and if that's the case then you never were really friends and a relationship wasn't going to work out to begin with.

1. Use your fucking brain
2. Try to think why she rejected you
3. Look things about you that can be based of your rejection
4. Stop being a fucking faggot and face the real world

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Let’s turn the tables for a sec.

Say, you’re into black chicks (wether it be by culture, body, skin, or some trivial shit), and a white chick wants to get with you, would you feel like an asshole for turning her down for not being your type? Even if it made her feel inadequate?

You’re not getting turned down for being inadequate, you’re getting turned down because you’re just not what does it for them, You can’t force people to bend over backwards for you, you just kinda gotta take the L, and be like, “fine, go fuck yourself, you’re missing out on a good opportunity”.

Have some fucking pride in yourself. You’re value isn’t based on who wants you, it’s based on who you are...have some fucking confidence to know they passed on something good, rather than being butthurt and thinking you missed out on something good...

You live your life right by you, good things will happen for you, it’s as simple as that. You choose to think you only matter based on the external things you acquire, you’re pretty much basing what makes you “you” on things which can never truly belong to you.

It’s pointless to get hurt by rejection.

No, I genuinely like her. I wasn't even looking to get into a relationship at the time, but I found myself falling in love. When I confessed to her, she said that we should remain friends. I know she has been on dates with guys tho, so it isn't like she wants to single. She just doesn't want me.

Stop trying to recruit another intel.

I'd go on at least one date with any girl that asked, though.

You’re probably ugly/clingy/emasculated af then.

Because you’re fucking desperate lol

and if no one wants you based on who are, who is correct about whether you are a good thing or not? you, or everyone else?

Not trying to, just explaining how it is for me

Well yeah, but why wouldn't you go?

You don’t get to take anything, not even pussy to your grave, when you die, the only thing that goes with you is you.

So obviously you decide if you’re a good thing or not.

If you think you’re not a good thing, no relationship is going to change you, and it’s just going to be a revolving door or people leaving.

It's sad because I made all these plans in my head about what we'd do if she said yes. Then BAM. Nope. "Get outta here, kid. You got no future".

I understand that, you’re genuinely just trying new things and giving people a chance...but as a woman giving people a chance is dangerous.

I’m a man for the record, raising a daughter...and I know someday some dude may hurt her so I want her to be blunt and decisive about who she includes in her life.

I also understand that eventually there may come a time where she’s alone and some tries to hurt or rape her, and I want her to be aware that even nice guys can be fucked up emotionally retarded serial killers...so considering that is how I feel I must raise her for her own safety, and that many other parents have raised their daughters in the same way, it’s highly uncommon for a woman to give a man, the benefit of the doubt. In their cases that shit can be the difference between falling in love or falling in a shallow grave. Women don’t have the same opportunity to be carefree and think, “if shit goes south, I’ll be ok, so let’s go with the flow”.

That’s why women are so blunt and don’t have time to give people chances like you or I do.

Not meant for you...

That was meant for

I understand that which is why I'm no longer interested in playing the game. Actually good guys can have her. I'm not here to waste anyone's time or be a burden more than I already am. Sorry

Best tip I've ever read that helped me deal with it.
The best girls to be with are the ones that want to be with you. If she says no she's done you a favour of sorting herself out. There are girls that will go out with you to be nice, not because they want to be with you. I've had that and it's a waste of her and my time. So if she says no it's good for me because I can focus on other women.
And srsly, if you take care of yourself and are cool to be around, then it's rarely about you when a girl rejects you. 99% of the time it's just the wrong moment. She's had an exhausting day and doesn't want to deal with guys, she just had a breakup and wants to be left alone, she's already in a relationship, her ex was a massive cunt and now she's super cautious and reluctant about meeting new guys, she's out with friends from work and doesn't want to look "easy" in their eyes etc. With women there are a thousand factors unrelated to you, so don't take it too hard

Here's a 3 minute video addressing your precise question.
youtu.be/5motuzyLXIk

Second sentence and it's already a staggering amount of cope. JUST

>be a burden
>sorry

Enough with the pity party.

>The best girls to be with are the ones that want to be with you.
disingenuous bollocks
the crux of op's question is, how to get non-desperate hamplanets to want to be with him?

Damn, you got rejected a lot my dude...lol.

It's true. Else women would like me

Nigga if I was gay and your therapist, I’d charge you double.

Get some fucking balls and stop thinking you aren’t good enough.

Hardly any of these excuses apply if you are attractive enough.

>She's had an exhausting day and doesn't want to deal with guys
Her exhausting day becomes less exhausting because something good (meeting you) happened.

>she just had a breakup and wants to be left alone
>her ex was a massive cunt and now she's super cautious and reluctant about meeting new guys
The only ones that really hold any water and even then ...

>she's already in a relationship
Which is now in danger because the other guy is poor little you

>she's out with friends from work and doesn't want to look "easy" in their eyes etc.
She's out with friends from work and gets approached by a 10/10 Chad, making her a winner in their eyes.

Sounds good.

Ok so first of all, yes rejection is personal. It's about as personal as it gets. Unless there is a very specific reason why she doesn't want to date you (for example: in a relationship), she is rejecting you because she doesn't want YOU.

That being said, the reason you shouldn't worry about it too much is because it happens to everyone. Every person, regardless of how attractive, confident, charming or whatever has been rejected multiple times in their lives. Any specific rejection from a particular girl is in no way an objective measurement of your attractiveness and sexual market value.

However, if you're getting rejected by practically every girl you meet and make a move on, you should definitely re-evaluate yourself and why it happens. Are you fat? Ugly? Socially awkward? Whatever it is there is something wrong you should try to fix.

Bottom line is, any specific rejection means nothing. Getting rejected by (nearly) everyone however DOES mean something.

My shift manager is so fat she doesn't have multiple chins, she has a nipple-less boob that dangles down from her neck.

She has a HR-look. The slightly-over-middle-aged died blond hair and think glasses. Two faced mid-management cow with who puts on a "niceness" when talking to younger men she fawns over, but is too stupid to treat other people nicely around these men so they see instantly how two faced she is.

Instant-spinster with neck jiggles that rival dead-or-alive boob physics.

You would date this creature if it asked (I suspect this female wienstein would "ask" in a more demanding and entitled manner)?

makes no sense. lets say im a serial killer, mass murderer or genocider like genghis khan or whatever. i decide im a good thing despite everyone else hating me. whats what?

The person I replied to was talking about 'types', so I was mostly referring to people that don't immediately appear off-putting in even a casual setting where dating wasn't even on the table. So no, I would probably not date her, but you're just deliberately looking for a chance to call me picky and maybe even trying to imply that I'm on her level.

Perhaps my point was literally to be less literal.

Try getting continuously rejected after a date or numerous dates. I don't care at all if some random girl said no from the start.

The complexity of a serial killer is that they don’t think they are wrong, they value their needs beyond others.

As an individual we actually only have value to ourselves. Other people’s opinions are impermanent because other people are impermanent as well.

On a daily basis we decide individually what we value, even if the entire world is against us. It may not be socially right or lawfully good but it really wouldn’t matter to the person committing the horrible acts.

What’s good to you, what you value most may be garbage to the entire world, but it wouldn’t change the way you feel about it would it?

Even if you’re a pos, you can still value yourself, right?

To take it personally you have to assume I'm doing something wrong intentionally meant to hurt you.

I tried to understand how guys think and all I can come up with is you pick a girl and determine she is perfect for you like a pair of shoes. In your mind you already own them and showing them to your friends without checking first if they have your size and if they don't you want them anyway and mad if they hurt your feet.

There are many things I have to consider in no particular order.
If I go out with him he will believe its leading somewhere and if it doesn't how much damage will he do to me.
Do I see myself kissing or ever having sex with him.
Does he want what I want at the moment. Like he wants sex and I want serious or I only want sex and he wants a wife.
Can I see him hanging out with my dad and they get along if I'm looking for a relationship.
Will he hit me because he's a closet asshole.
Will it ruin any chance with the guy I really like if I go out with a guy
Will my friends like him nor not

I read on Jow Forums daily if I choose wrong its my fault and I deserve any horror I get.
If I defer and say no thanks its my fault and I deserve any horror I get.
If I choose a guy I really like all the other guys will call me a whore and stupid bitch.

So its better I do my evade maneuvers up front but even then they corner me sometimes and then I'm like a frighted mouse.

Kylie Page

Bueno.

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Yeah that's great and all that you can project your own ugliness but this thread is about dealing with rejection so if rationalizion doesn't work for you coming up for probable reasons for her not to be in to you, it doesn't matter. You need to not get butthurt and wounded and move on to the next girl.

I make songs about it. Helpe get it all out.

>Holy moly, I think dudes these days were raised by movies than raised by actual fucking people.

They have been. It's nothing good but it's better that I've been raised by television and the internet than by my parents.

He gets pretty women by asking them out and risking rejection. I'm not saying he should be a passive good boy and wait in line, I'm just telling him how to deal with rejection itself

These excuses even apply to good looking men, stop kidding yourself