So I need to talk to my boyfriend about something that’s been bothering me but I’m afraid to. He’s called me crazy and dismissed my feelings in the past and it’s honestly got me so messed up now. I’m constantly questioning myself and my rational thought and wondering if I’m really just being crazy and I don’t know how to feel.
The thing in question is mainly this girl. They work at the same phone store, I think on different shifts but they are also on a bowling team together. They very often chatting on Snapchat and it bothers me because he won’t open anything from her in front of me. If I’m in seeing distance he will wait to open it until I’m gone or turned away. He says she’s in love with his best friend (who is ripped, my boyfriend and I are both potatoes) but it just doesn’t sit right with me.
Am I going crazy, Jow Forums? Would it be wrong of me to bring this up?
Tell him it makes you uncomfortable, and tell him you FEEL dismissed if he doesn't respect your feelings.
Brayden Reyes
Thanks for the feedback
He’s with his friends now so I’ll wait till later to bring it up, unless that’s something I should bring up when I see him instead of texting?
Julian Harris
That's a bring up in person kind of deal
Don't want to him to be able to formulate a reply and plan around you.
You want to see his reactions in person
Daniel Baker
He might have a different kind of relationship with her. One that can't ever truly exist. Let him indulge, it shouldn't complicate things anymore than porn trades. At least he's not a sicko, or a cheater. Sex can lead to babies and disease, this just leads to nudes and masterbation.
Logan Howard
bump
Mason Hill
congrats, your boyfriend is her beta orbiter.
Jace Perez
It's not crazy to feel jealousy. If you are worried about bringing it up then you probably have work to do on your communication with one another.
Christian Lopez
If he's spending time alone with the other grill he's fantasizing about her which is not monogamy therefore cheating. Die mad. Dump him sis.
Chase Miller
This. And this. If he fails to compromise and continues to dismiss your feelings, you need to consider leaving. >my boyfriend and I are both potatoes Wait a minute, why not fight to keep your man? Why would you be satisfied with being a potato? Do you have some sort of condition?
Jace Turner
Him and I are both going to the gym. He’s been going longer but I’ve been working hard on it as of late. But in all honesty sometimes I wonder if he’s worth the fight anymore
Alexander Barnes
They are on the same bowling team which he says is a work bowling team. His brother is on it and I guess sometimes his dad? Idk. He says I can’t come to watch him bowl because that’s “his time”. I basically see him Wednesday nights and Saturday nights through Sunday night. Thursday is when he bowls
Parker White
Well keep that feeling on the backburner. Confront him, if he doesn't compromise etc.
Jonathan Morales
>He’s called me crazy and dismissed my feelings in the past
Classic. Look up "gaslighting", have a good read, and if your bf keeps doing it dump his fucking ass.
Wyatt Bailey
That's a red flag.
Daniel Peterson
This.
Justin Roberts
That could be suspicious. Or it could just be that you are a drama queen and will turn anything into a conflict point.
I had a crazy gf. I also had a female work friend. My crazy gf told me that "based on experience, your work friend is in love with you". She isn't, never has been, and there is 0 interest from my side for anything like that. Sometimes my work friend will send me texts, asking about work, asking about getting coffee and stuff like that. Nothing shady, nothing sneaky. But when I got a text from her, my crazy gf would go crazy. Even a "hey how are you, I need to ask you a question about this stuff" was interpreted by my crazy gf as some attempt to sleep with me. *Every* text I got from my work friend would lead to a fight with my crazy gf because she would always start something up. And if I had coffee with my work friend *at work during lunch* then she'd go bonkers too. If there was nothing to go bonkers over, she'd go bonkers over whatever we talked about next, such as dinner or sleep habits or whatever. She'd just twist whatever into an argument so she could spew her emotions over me.
The reason I'm bringing this up is that there is at least one scenario where your bf would absolutely try to hide any text from you even if there's nothing whatsoever going on. I did. Not because I was doing something shady, but because the mere existence of a text would lead to a pointless and frustrating fight. Have you had arguments or fights over this previously? Is there any reason why your bf would want to conceal a normal text?
Adam Jackson
Yeah honestly this. It’s probably nothing but if you don’t trust him then just leave him already. You said he’s not worth it anymore so you’re basically looking for a reason to leave so just leave.
Alexander Walker
have you ever confronted him over your suspicions of him fooling around with other girls? If so, he's doing this to avoid that conversation again.
Christian Clark
We’ve definitely had a talk about it once. He got a phone call from her at like 3 AM, wouldn’t answer the text or call even when I told him to. The next morning he said he texted her and said that she said her friend had her phone and called him. I’ve said a few times that she messages him quite often
Wyatt Green
Yes once. Thanks so much for the insight it makes me feel a lot better lol
