I HAVE to confess to my therapist

that i like her as in i want to be with her. long story short, i'm a femanon who fell for her female therapist. there's a 8 years gap between us and the last couple discussions were about our relationship and how it is a mirror of what my life is in general. i've never showed emotion, i am used to repress any feeling and i tend to reject people after realising i am romantically attracted to them. i fear that i'll stop showing up at therapy after i tell her how i feel. when i try to express emotion i cry and i don't wanna look weak in front of her

Attached: 49759360_244977353094518_1404587594775546777_n copy.jpg (483x483, 127K)

lmao just ask her out you literal faggot

Master bate yr pussy

Take her on a date or something. I get the feeling you are just another patient for her. Ask her about going out as friends of something and get to know eachother first. There's nothing to do unless you get out of therapy enviroment.

Tell her that you want to be a better person because of her and her work.

Tell her that you want her to be your friend, after your therapy.

Get your shit together, become her friend and tell her about your feelings, after you have achieved a good life. Even then don't tell her that you've done it for her.

Do it for her, but show her a "you", that she can be proud to know and then fall in love.

Be an asset not a liability.

Therapist here. What you're going through is normal and its called transference. If she has any experience whatsoever she's been through this already. Given that she's already picked up on how your therapeutic relationship is mirroring your life and your pattern of rejecting people you're romantically interested in I wouldn't be at all surprised if she's been expecting this. Let her know, work through it. It'll be good for your treatment and your personal growth.

She's not going to fuck you, but what you're feeling isn't really about her anyway. This is your breakthrough, let it happen.

Thats not going to work.
Thats not going to happen.
This is pants on head retarded.

If she says yes she's a predator and sack of shit

So what you’re telling me is that if I become a therapist I’ll be able to fuck all the qts that transference to me?

Sexual and romantic relationships are strictly prohibited for both current and former clients. The moment you or any of your client fuckbuddies peep, you'll lose your license. Plus if those chicks are coming for therapy, there's a 90% they're truly fucked in the head and act out badly. As they say, don't stick your dick in crazy.

But love is love man. That’s discrimination

>This is pants on head retarded.

Not if she wants her.

As long as op is the patient she won't have a chance. Only chance to get her to be a romantic part of her life is to be something else than a patient.

To be that she has to be a functional person.
To become a functional person she needs a motivation to transcend her non functional self. Being in love can be such a motivation.

That's what pedophiles say, but we still castrate and slaughter those fuckers.

But we don’t actually, they occupy our highest positions in religion and government

youre the retarded sperg falling for your therapist. to her youre just another client, shes probably 100 other patients try to get with her she'll just brush you off, rightfully so

Problem is that OP will probably never have a chance with her. I know the code of ethics regarding relationships with former patients is iffy(claiming its ""allowed"" about 3 years after sessions have formally ended), but any self respecting therapist would never do it. The relationship would be in a similar vein to a worker dating their boss; one of them has most of the power in the relationship/one is dependent on the other.

Op, just take that transference advice from the therapist in this thread. As you get better and better, you'll find someone who you'll loves and understands you.

And that's the great injustice of all. I'd say we slaughter them now, but those damned weasels continue worm their way through the ranks. In the very slightest, be better than them.

Nah, you'll get sued. I'm saying patients fall for therapists all the damn time so they're trained to manage it. Its literally part of the treatment process. I'm a bear pushing 40, when a 16 year old girl falls for me its not because of anything I'm bringing to the table. Besides, that shits gross as fuck, like, worse than incest. My job is literally seeing how the sausage is made, you couldn't get me to eat it.

Things are tough all over.

OP will never have a chance unless her therapist is mentally ill and incredibly unethical. I'd never see an ex-patient socially. I actively avoid it.

Life isn't a romcom.

Actually, I was the therapist saying all of those ideas were stupid.

>OP will never have a chance unless her therapist is mentally ill and incredibly unethical. I'd never see an ex-patient socially. I actively avoid it.

That's why I said that she needs to transcend herself. It is possible but very unlikely. Nevertheless could she pull through all the circumstances and use the hindrances she has now as stepping stones.

Change, grow, work on a true friendship, then use the handicap as an advantage.

Nothing is impossible, but many things are very unlikely.
The unlikely things are, most often, the most valuable of them all.

>nothing is impossible
This pipe dream being healthy if it happened is. OP would need to remain fixated on a something incredibly unlikely instead of engaging in life and their therapist would have to be a broken person with poor boundaries.

You're essentially advising OP to bet their future on a lottery where the only prize is a fucking train wreck.

its an illusion. you think you have an emotional connection to this person because they are the only person in your entire life that you talk about feelings with. It takes a village to be a whole person.
There are certain things you'll talk about with acquaintances, others with friends, siblings, etc.
There are some things you'll talk about with your dad but not your mom and vice-versa.

Basically you need more people to emotionally connect with. right now you've got the whole of your emotional support riding on one person. and if they reject you, you'll feel devastated.
You don't actually like her. You just have no other emotional options.

i thought i could be with her forever for sure as i felt so much attraction in her... but she was just too much work and i wasn't in a "homesick" phase (i mean if i still felt attraction to men, i wouldnt be in therapy, maybe, when i'm more "homesick"), so i didn't give her time to get into it. The only positive aspect was that she said she had always felt more attracted to men when i was younger, but i found out now that she was wrong :) but she is so sweet, so gentle and understanding. it's been three years since i met her and in all of that time i haven't felt ANY attraction toward her. i was in a relationship for 3 years. i thought i was attracted to everyone, for about 8-10 years before i found myself in this relationship. i just stopped feeling that way a few years ago when i saw her in the mirror and i stopped thinking about that love. i guess i'm getting old and am feeling more lonely. i love me and i would like to stay with her but I know i can't because after all she did to make me fall in love, she gave me the hiv

If your therapist doesn't know this already she's a shit therapist and she should already be withdrawing and getting you help with another.

>You're essentially advising OP to bet their future on a lottery where the only prize is a fucking train wreck.

No, I would also prefer her to engage in the real world. To find real friends and a partner that is not paid to listen to her. I just took her and her emotions seriously.

I also think it's transference what's happening here, but I wanted to show that there is hope if she really could not let got of it. It's not the path of least resistance, but it's not impossible and the other person doesn't have to be insane for it to work. It's just unlikely because of everything you said.

If she's so obsessed with the idea, she should atleast use the energy to overcome herself and her problems.

Finishing Therapy,
Getting Life back in order,
year long friendship with her,
Confession.

Or easier:
Realising it's just transference.
Searching for other people who can make you feel that way and that aren't paid to endure you.

Watch the Sopranos, become an Italian, learn to make spaghetti like they do it in the mother country, don't fall for your psychologist

>not because of anything I'm bringing to the table

You still have a lot to learn about psychotherapy.

I hope you aren't paying for this shit user.

I mean as someone to fall in love with. Transference is transference and I'm a guy who listens, but the kids who fall in love aren't falling in love with me, they're falling in love with the fantasy and the experience and the things I represent. Hell, they're not even really falling in love, thats just what you call it when you feel the way you do in that situation and your emotional capacity is coming back on line. It looks like love when you're in it, but its something else. I could look like Chris Evans or have two heads, half a dick, and smell like a sewer; the same thing is going to happen.

Transference and countertransference are inevitable and to pretend as if you're better than a natural, organic function between organisms, because you're supposedly consciously aware of it, is logical arrogance and also naive as most transference/countertransference happens outside of conscious perception and therefore outside of psychological control.

The very act of psychoanalytical therapy introduces a neurosis into the therapist/patient relationship dynamic as the therapist assumes the authoritative, one-up role in the dynamic and the patient, the one-down subservient role. This is why psychoanalysis is inherently flawed, especially when practiced by therapists who are not aware of this happening. If you're curious about how it feels to be in the one-down position during psychoanalysis I recommend switching seats with one of your patients or an intern, for several sessions, to feel this dynamic. This act is what sparked Trigant Burrow to write The Social Basis for Consciousness which I recommend to you if you haven't read it yet.

xx or xy

>to pretend as if you're better than a natural, organic function between organisms

Thats not at all what I'm saying, though. I'm saying that I have the insight and boundaries to recognize it for what it is and control for it. Theres a reason we've got rigid ethical guidelines and rules, theres also a reason why its best practice to be in your own therapy so long as you're working.

As for the authoritative vs subservient question you raise, its an important one. The way I manage that is by absolutely refusing to introduce treatment goals into a therapy. I let my patients know what the rules are, I let them know what the boundaries are, I let them know what my role is, and then I do my work. They set the goals, they tell me what they want to alter or develop, and I take a position thats as devoid of specific desire as I can make it. If I find myself wanting things or steering I bring that to my own treatment and if I can't get it under control quickly I refer a patient out.

sexual and romantic relationships are strictly prohibited for both student and teacher at public schools. but you don't see teachers trying to cease fucking and sucking 13yr old now do you?

Attached: 20150914_133559.jpg (3264x2448, 3.14M)