>Friend is mid 30's >Has a wife and kid >He's cheating on her with a girl he works with >Tells me how in love he is with this girl >Never stops talking about her >They've been secretly together for 4+ years >I suggest divorcing wife, giving her and his kid closure also >He says "Nah, they need me" >His wife wants another kid >Girl is upset, but still loves him >Recently found out he was fucking around with another girl he also works with for 2 years while still with current girl >Current girl breaks it off with him, most likely from finding out >He shaves his entire beard, depressed anime girl style, and says how current girl "fucked everything up"
He apparently wanted to "eventually" move in with current girl, and spill out the shit hes been hiding. I'm guessing he wanted to make it seem like she couldn't refuse being with him after finding a place?
My question is, what should I do or say in this situation? I feel like he's a sociopath and I'm getting really tired of his bullshit. He used to be chill, but now, he's obsessed being in control, with grooming and cheating, it seems.
honestly, fuck that guy, you do not need someone so fucked up in your life. walk away. i just feel sorry for his wife, but she is not your responsibility, tho you can consider letting her know
>what should I do or say?
Woah, hold the motherfucking horses, we have a fucking Jesus over here!
Yeah there, Mr. Whiteknight, why don't you *do* something, right? Because you... have to? Sent to Earth by God? Elected representative of the Grand Ethics Council of High Morality?
Here's what you *should* do: put a loaded gun into your mouth, aimed at the roof of said mouth, towards the top-back of your head. Then pull the trigger.
That ought to remind you about how you should mind your own fucking business and worry about your own life before you try to be moral Superman and get involved in other people's drama.
He told me his wife gets very abusive when shes pissed, throwing shit at him and stuff. But at this point, I dont know what to believe when he constantly lies and makes up stories. I am definitely considering it, but I dont want to chance his kid getting harmed in the middle of it all. Hes only 6
think about this - if you don't tell her, they will get another one and when it all comes out eventually (it will for sure), there will be more suffering
you sound like you also cheat on your wife and suddenly got uncomfortable go cry somewhere else
I’m sorry your life has been so fucked up user. All the best
>My question is, what should I do or say in this situation? Any chance you can get the other woman and his wife's phone number? If somehow you can get both their numbers, spoof the other woman's number and call the wife. Then spoof the wife and call the other woman.
Yeah, makes sense. I dont want this shit to go on anymore
Cheaters always claim their SO sucks. It's gaslighting 101.
call wife, spill the beans, cut ties with friend.
A true friend wouldn’t sit idly while seeing someone they care about have their life spiral out of control. Stirring shit isn’t what Sir Morales would do, offering support and advice is. He’s already involved incidentally; the key to being a good friend instead of a presumptuous pretend “hero” is to be mindful!
Avoid him. If he does this to his own wife imagine what he will do to you if you get tied into his drama in any way. It's not your problem.
Tell friend he is acting fucking retarded. Trying to juggle 3 women without them finding out.
You should tell him that he is a sociopath and not monogamous until he cracks and ruins the rest of his life.
>My question is, what should I do or say in this situation? I feel like he's a sociopath and I'm getting really tired of his bullshit. He used to be chill, but now, he's obsessed being in control, with grooming and cheating, it seems.
you're probably right just from what you given us here.
people like that don't know moderation. And even if they seem to be showing some now, its just a matter of time before you become a likely target of his machinations too, just for him to prove the point.
and this asshole... while about as articulate as a doll with no joints, there is a truth here that there isn't much for you to do except protect yourself from the clustfuck as it unfolds.
Especially if you're independently friends with the wife. Because not if, when she finds out, her quest to weed out whom she can and can't trust isn't going to stop with him, it'll be on anything with his smell
That is not what a “good friend” is. This guy is fucking multiple people, could possibly not be using protection (he’s the type to fuck around with reckless abandon), and may even further trap his wife with another spawn. A good friend has every right to “judge” objectively horrible behavior.
This is a unique kind of buttblasted
Tell him you'll tell his wife everything unless he gives you $300 a month. Nothing too crazy. His wife won't even notice, and his secret is safe.. That's $3,600 a year which is a decent amount of money
OP, I’ve been in a remarkably similar situation, I’ll tell you what I did and how it turned out in another post.
I’ll start with what I consider black and white. Your friend is a completely dogshit person, and I can guarantee you he’d fuck You over in a heartbeat if you had something he wanted. Or hell, maybe just because he gets off on taking things or being conniving. The word sociopath is accurate. Cheating happens, but this bizarre extended bullshit he’s pulling- with MULTIPLE people; the way he did a 180 on the 4-year girl and now she’s “evil”. My guess is that’s exactly what he did to his wife. He’s likely been treating her like shit and fucking with her head, and when she reacts? Oh! Ruining everything! What an abusive bitch! Talking to him isn’t an option, he’ll just justify, deny, and say retarded shit about you “judging” him like these other retards in this thread. Cut him off completely, OP. Whether or not you choose to tell him why is up to you.
The only thing up for debate here is- do you or do you not tell the wife. We’ve already established he’s likely lying about her behavior/leaving out pretty important context. We know he’s with at least 3 people, and I wouldn’t be surprised to learn he’s not using condoms either. So, there’s a genuine health risk there too. That said she will likely 1) make you the bad guy, 2) she’ll stay with him, 3) have her life turned upside down and ruined for a long while 4) likely drag you into at least a LITTLE drama. The key here is to NOT CARE if ‘justice’ is served; it’s not your business or place to see to it that he’s punished. In my opinion it’s about giving her the opportunity to make life choices while having all the relevant facts. You drop the bomb, and wash your hands of it. Or, you say nothing- which is an understandable act of self-preservation.
Contact Internal Affairs and spill the beans, they're going to love this shit.