"If it's mentionable, it's manageable..."

So get a gun
Reading this whole thread is making me think you wish you were a woman.

Literal guns are fucking retarded.

I mean, I've shot them, and the physical reaction to causing the kind of damage to physical objects as that which is rendered by firing a 9-mil or a shotgun into the paper targets or whatnot you might be aiming for is totally awesome, and I'm not gonna lie about that.

But that's as true for girls as it is for boys.

Like, everybody wants power, you explosive firebrand of gadflyish rhetoric.

It's a solid move, though. Raising the question of my masculinity. I mean, I've dreamed of being a woman before, but the problem is that I'm just perpetually attracted to women, whether I am one or not. It has nothing to do with my interest in firearms, though - I know plenty of women who know more about them than me. But being a woman would only help me in terms of how successful a lesbian I could be, and even then I'd miss having a penis.

It just seems that mercy is a concept that is so often associated with guilt.

As if we must beg for mercy from whoever has decided that we've done them wrong.

But what if we haven't?

And who determines that?

If one claims that you are guilty, but you honestly don't see how it's the case, from whom do you ask mercy other than whoever might agree with them?

And what do you do when you are a minority of opinion in terms of whether you have guilt?

I'm just asking questions here.

You should blame Mr. Rogers if you have any problems with anything being said.

He'd probably handle it way better than I would anyway.

But, then, maybe again, I could also be a terrible human being.

I don't know. I guess I only have the ability to judge others' actions based on how they'd make me feel, and most of the times I have to admit they'd annoy me to a large extent, because most of what I see is people trying to control others based on how they think that person should behave, and I don't like being told how to behave, because I don't think there's anything but me and the person with whom I'm communicating in terms of my behavior to tell me what to think about it, so it's really a question of me and whomever I am attempting to communicate with that ever matters.

I guess if that makes me a terrible human being, though, then I'll take the rap. But if whom I'm communicating to is human, then they'd understand as long as I'm human. I mean, who wants to be told what to do?

I was referring to your figurative gun.

Well, you're staring down the barrel of it.

I mean, what can any of us do but explain how we feel about what we're experiencing?

To whom are you going to confess what though, and to what end?

What good does it do to tell someone you have always loved them or despised them, and what power does it have over their lives?

None.

Maybe you have always resented someone for something they did and which you never saw resolved. So what? You can tell them, and they can either apologize for it or not, but it doesn't really matter, does it?

Or is it the opposite, and you've always loved someone and they never really understood it? So what? You can tell them, and they either can either express regret for it or not, but it doesn't really matter, does it?

My figurative gun is the degree to which I am capable of exerting power and influence, because that's literally what guns mean in the literal universe in which I exist.

Like, let's not make this weird - that's the metaphor we're all working with, right?

I mean, if I have a gun and you don't, then that means I'm able to kill you.

That's about as influential as you can get.

Until you just don't care anymore.

I mean, eventually it gets so boring that you just don't care anymore.

Not that you wish for death, by any means, but rather that you just realize that if someone is going to kill you, then you probably can't do anything about it in the long run, so like you might as well just say something funny before you die.

I mean, if someone is literally going to murder you, it's unlikely that you'll be able to do anything about it.

So you just sort of hope that saying something funny when you die is the best bet you'll have in terms of protesting the fact that anyone who can blow your brains out has the right to do it.

Because in terms of the literal universe that I can detect... they do.

Not everything is about power and force, or figurative guns.

Like, if someone really wants to blow your brains out, and they know where you live, and what kind of car you drive...

What could you have to say against it?

Like, I mean, good job - you figured out where I live and what kind of car I drive, and whatever else enabled you to blow my brains out, but...

How fucking hard is that?

Like what is even the point of doing that?

I almost wouldn't mind getting murdered if I could be told what the fuck I'm even bothering to be getting murdered for.

In fact, I'd say that if I'm gonna get murdered, I'd darn well need to know what the point was, or else I'd refuse to be murdered to whatever degree I was able to refuse it.

If it's a good enough reason, I might even agree with it.

I mean, I'm not completely unreasonable. Maybe I should die. Maybe you should kill me.

You just have to explain it to me is all.

I mean, this is a pretty common conundrum: why does anybody deserve to die?

But if it's mentionable, it's manageable. So fire away.

>Not everything is about power and force

Yes, it is. You encounter many people throughout your life. You have very little control over what they do or say, and you care about that to varying degrees based on how you feel about them, which is mired in some sort of hocus-pocus that I can't even really make sense of other than to call it that.

But you hope that what you do matters to the people you want it to matter to, and you hope that it makes a difference in terms of what you hope happens.

That's what figurative guns are. The hope that what you do matters.

Because the people with literal ones seem to be getting all the attention, and I'm tired to death of it.

See what I did there? That's a pun. Because people with literal guns kill other people. Ha, ha, ha.

So you think you know about power and force outside of literally killing others?

Okay, so tell me how.

You think I should do something that I don't want to do: how do you make me do it?

You don't unless you can compel me through the threat of death.

No big surprise.

But you can never make me feel like I should, no matter the caliber of your muzzle.

Even if I had to kill a squadron of enemy combatants, I could never believe that they were ever very different from me, and that I wasn't essentially killing myself.

And anyone who believes they were is part of a different definition of humanity that I have.

I'm not saying they're wrong. But if they're right, then why am I still alive?

Not reading your post but one of my favorite quotes is attributed to Diogenes; “It is the privilege of the gods to want nothing and of god-like men to want little.”

>“It is the privilege of the gods to want nothing and of god-like men to want little.”

That is the fucking calling card of the weak. Who the fuck cares what the gods want? They are not us. And as for the god-like men?

They are only told what the gods are like by those who claim to know the gods.

Maybe they know; maybe they don't. Who really gives a shit?

I want everything I am entitled to, and that includes a life where I am satisfied.

So miss me with your "god-like men will let the universe just fuck them until they're done being fucked and then they're still just tools of the uncaring universe schtick."

I'm not saying I'm a god-like man, but I am saying that god is so much of a lie that if you asked me to match them to a lineup, I don't think I'd be able to.

Maybe we did this to ourselves.

But I want everything. I see no divinity in pretending that I am not good enough to deserve what I want. I have suffered enough. So Diogenes sounds like a fag.

If that's what he wants to be, though, then I only hope he gets what he wants.

You took one of two readings and went off the rails with it. The first is as you said; to be content with little, poverty, or shit circumstances. A step further, which is my preferred reading, is to be content only with yourself. Once you are peace solely by existing, then you can be “happy.” You’re free to do whatever you want and circumstance can never get you down because at the end of the day you have the most important thing; yourself.

...are *at* peace solely...

> You took one of two readings

No... I took both.

Nice trips, though.

>The first is as you said; to be content with little, poverty, or shit circumstances

Oh, so like basically most people on the planet? Thanks for confirming that existed.

>To be content only with yourself

So, just like rock out alone because being alone is so awesome. Gee, being content only with yourself is so great, because who needs anyone else when you're as awesome as you think you'd have to be to not need anyone else? Foolproof plan, senpai.

Oh. This level of misrepresentation or misunderstanding is not fun to work with.
You can be happy with yourself and also use others to make your life easier. It’s about wanting that he takes issue; desiring, yearning, these generate stress. You’ll never be happy so long as you do these. Maybe you don’t want to be happy and that’s fine. No one says you have to be

So how do you find yourself at peace, much less solely?

I mean, I have more unresolved questions than a single audience member who watched "Inception" (it really wasn't that well-constructed, desu).

What does "solely" even mean, and why would anyone want it?

It just means you're alone.

What makes you want to be alone?

Do you understand what ellipses do? The whole sentence was
>Once you are *at* peace solely by existing, then you can be “happy.”
It could mean being grateful for existing, or perhaps finding beauty in life in itself, or maybe just saying, “I’m alive and that enough.” It doesn’t preclude you from seeking others or following other goals, but it means that nothing can hurt you so long as you exist and you value yourself

*that’s enough*
Sorry, just waking up

>This level of misrepresentation or misunderstanding is not fun to work with.

Lol... what are you talking about? This level of misrepresentation and misunderstanding is like the best to work with.

You have so many things you could say that would explain your relative situation, but the fact that you don't means that I'm not wrong, lol.

But just because I'm not wrong doesn't mean I'm not right either.

I don't ever remember being happy with myself. Every place I've ever been is a mixture of pain and pleasure, to be completely honest.

But I didn't use others to make my life easier. As much as I might have been able to, that's something I sure as shit don't remember doing, so miss me with that guilt-magnet, lol.

I honestly don't think I could be happy with myself if I used other people to make my life easier.

Not that I'd blame anyone for doing so, but I would totally think less of them.

I mean, yeah, I know what ellipses do, but when your whole premise leads to the word "happy" in scare-quotes, then like...

See how that works?

I'm doubtful of what you mean by that.

I don't know how not to exist. That seems to be the case. I don't know why valuing oneself is important at all, because if one were valuable, then that value would exist regardless of their own estimation of said value.

I hate waking up. I try not to do it if I can help it.

>I don't know how not to exist.

I mean, I haven't literally tried to kill myself. If someone told me I were already dead I don't think I'd be all that surprised, to be honest.

All I know is that I keep waking up in the same body I fell asleep in, and it's really annoying, so I guess I must be alive for some kind of reason, and that kind of shitty logic is what makes me not want to live, so I guess the joke's on me, hueheuehue.

Oh, well. So I don't want to live but I have to live. That's pretty classic comedy.

Does it ever get funnier than that?

>And there's literally nothing you can do about it except hope that someday you find people who are interested in your company all the time.

This doesn't exist, but it has nothing to do with how charming you are, or how much people like you. Everybody needs a break from each other every now and then.

But I'm seeing that you probably understand that, and appear to be more out-of-sorts over low self-image.

I'm a rando on the internet. I don't know you. I can't deconstruct your sense of self to show you where you have strengths, or talents, or beauty, or value. And to show you these things would not necessarily help you with internalizing them, which is more important than any opinion I or anyone else might have about you.

You mentioned that you've got some experience with therapy. What was that like?

>People get fucking tired of you.
>I mean, there are people whom you can entertain for hours, but once they yawn, you know your time is over with them and they're going to tell you to just fuck off and leave them to go home and get away from you because they basically have no interest in you unless you're making them laugh or entertaining them in some other way.
>reddit.com/r/science/comments/bm3zu4/shooting_the_messenger_is_a_psychological_reality/
>reddit.com/r/Showerthoughts/comments/8gxrks/the_people_who_take_advantage_of_nice_people_are/
>reddit.com/r/science/comments/boho56/if_you_love_your_job_someone_may_be_taking/
>reddit.com/r/NarcissisticAbuse/
>reddit.com/r/raisedbynarcissists/