I'm having a dilemma and need advice

I'm having a dilemma and need advice.
My grandma is dying and my mom wants to visit her before she dies. Here is the problem.

I am indifferent about her but my mom really cares for her and wants this but we can't really financially afford it because my grandma lives in California and we live in Texas. We would have to drive because my mom can't air travel due to health issues.
I have the vacation time to take off to do it for a day but we don't have money. I have a 5000 dollar credit like I can use with discover since my credit is great but I worry about using it since it would out me further in debt thanks to her when she already caused me to go into 48k worth of student loan debt and no way to pay it off.

She really wants to visit her one last time but should I put myself in debt to do this? My mom says she is there when we needed her and this is probably the last time we can see her but I just don't think I can do it.

What should I do?

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Jesus Christ OP


Fuck I wish man. I get to die and still cause no pain to my family.

Maybe speak to your mum and offer to contribute a little to the trip. Tell her you've saved a bit aside and you'd like to give her X amount towards seeing grandma "even though I know it's not a lot, but if it'll help then you're welcome to it". You can't afford it but your mum will appreciate the gesture and even if she can't go in the end it will look like you were trying to help, not just standing by going hmmmMMMmm.

She wants the whole family to go and has no money for it. Other side of the family wont do shit. It would literally be all me paying for it.

Just be like "I can't afford for the whole family to go but maybe just the two of us could take a trip, or maybe even I could just help towards paying for you to go alone?"

If she kicks off, then you gotta hand her some truth. Ask her what's more important, dragging a bunch of people to see grandma, or her personally seeing grandma for the last time.


I already offered that and she says it has to be the entire family.

>I get to die and still cause no pain to my family.
[spoiler]This has already happened to you.[/spoiler]

No it hasn't because I know I am still here, not my copy

This is so harsh.
Can't your dad help?
Does she seriously have health-flight issues or she's just scared of it ? There's several ways to go on a plane and not suffer from air sickness, paranoia, vomit, etc.
Also, it would be cheaper since you don't have to pay for all that fuel.
Can't go on a train or a bus?

Please, ain't never seen him in my life.
As for health issues, she wouldn't elaborate but I'm assuming a combo of both scared to go alone and health issues.
Train or bus might be a good idea. Didn't think of those desu.

That's exactly what your copy would also think.

Just ask if it's really so important everybody go, that she would forfeit her own chance to see grandma.

If she says no, then she goes. If she says yes, then she's ready to forfeit her chance, it's her choice and there's nothing you can do.

Present the options and back off to let her think about it.

This is essentially it. It is no economically feasible for you to shoulder the burden of something if you cannot. As grim as it sounds, you don't seem too invested in this at all, so you should be diplomatic about this and try and get your family to consolidate funds to travel

Are these family members paying you back? That's honestly a lot to ask for.. meaning having you pay for everything

W/e man, I'm know I'm still here so that's the problem.

Guess ill argue that point some more

It's not a case of arguing. State the facts, then walk away. Don't get sucked in my family manipulation.


>I'm know I'm still here so that's the problem.
And I'm saying teleportation wouldn't fix that.

I know it's irrelevant to the thread, but it's a bit of a peeve of mine when people think teleportaion you die and someone else takes over your role. It's dumb. Teleportation would mean death any more than you from a second ago having died and been replaced by a copy.

Sorry. Shutting up now.

Actually it would be death of the original and the copy would have knowledge of that death and know it's not the original. I'm saying the real me right now would dead and I wouldn't give a shit about my copy.

>I'm saying the real me right now would dead and I wouldn't give a shit about my copy.
And I'm saying that's as stupid ass not giving a shit about yourself tomorrow or one second into the future.
It fucking blows my mind how idiots don't see that.

Because unlike death, the person I know I am right now will be effective by events tomorrow or whatever I do to myself.
Suicide by teleportation is the best option.


Yes, I know you're trolling me just to make me upset. It's working. How can people be so dumb?

Yes there is, the knowledge of the death is critical

That's just idiotic. You might just as well say that you don't give a fuck about your future because the knowledge of toothbrushes is critical.

>You might just as well say that you don't give a fuck about your future because the knowledge of toothbrushes is critical
What has that to do with my hypothesis?
The clone has all the original memories and personality but your current conscience does not transfer. Your original conscience is dead. That's me

Actually, this is the solution to your problem op. Just go brush your teeth and it will become somebody elses problem.

>conscience does not transfer
Yes it does. There is no such thing as an atomic coherent consciousnes. Your consciousnes and sense of continuity is entirely defined by your thoughts and memories. Your clone will inherit your memories and thus the continuation of your consciousness.

Destroyed matter cannot be rebuilt only replicated. The replicant will never have the original conscience.

Consciousness is not matter.

It is

You should do it. No need to spend 5k just stay in cheap hotels

Most honorable child

What is consciousness. If you don’t know you don’t know its properties

Pro tip: you don’t know

Consciousness is generated by electrochemical signals in your brain. These signals are not matter.
The signals are aggragets of movements of ions through your neural cell membranes and neurotransmitter molecules between the neurons. These movements are not matter.
The ions and neurotransmitter molecules are matter.
It is completely irrelevant exactly what matter is performing the movement. If the movement patterns are the same, the signals are the same, the generated consiousness is the same. The replicant inherits the movement patterns and thus inherits the consciousness.

We are matter but our consciousness exists beyond this “reality” and also part of it. Our consciousness is also “matter” in terms of existing physically but not in the traditional sense

Manage your mother's expectations, get her to agree to paying you back ASAP or something, or just pay for her to go.
Airlines do discounts to visiting sick relatives/funerals but that doesn't help as she can't fly.

It's not your place to pay for your mother (especially with your massive debt), it's her place to help you.