Is 26 too old to start dating? I've literally never kissed a girl

Fuck no
Get in shape, get out there and smash some pussy

That's more like it
Pair it with the fact I'm pretty boring and ugly and it's pretty much a done deal already

Just likeSaid, don’t go out there looking for the love of your life. Keep a journal and don’t look for anything too serious at first. Just get more experience and steadily keep increasing your SMV

Oh I see now. I do that too sometimes, I make a thread looking for validation on my giving up.
Look, I know fuckall, alright? I'm also 26 and never had any female ever interested in me. I don't see any reason why this might change.

All the shit I wrote are educated guesses and conclusions from conversations with normie friends as well as endless hours browsing Jow Forums and Jow Forums.
Maybe I hit the nail on the head or maybe I'm a complete moron and just keep telling those things to myself as an excuse to not put in any effort.
But at the end of the day, none of this matters, because it's not like any female is gonna take interest in your or me anyway, right?

If you are that worried about it then practice with a prostitute a few times.

How many girls have you asked out in your lifetime? I get a feeling we all know the answer.

Hey, it's not like I'm pretending it's anyone else's fault.

>Nah there had to be an age
thank's for letting us know you are literally too stupid to comprehend how life or relationships work.

there is no time fucktard
get the fuck off Jow Forums, you're too dumb already

OP does have a point in that, if you never asked a girl out before, you're gonna look like a complete retard doing so for the first time at 25+.

As opposed to looking like a complete retard doing so for the first time at 20. You move on.

It's actually socially acceptable to look like a complete retard doing that at 18,19,20.
You are a literal creep, incel, 'omg someone tell his boss and get him fired' if you do so at 26.

do you ask girls out based on the opinion of strangers? do you ask the room to rate how awkward they think you are and then add that to your social credit score?

this whole idea is nonsense. you can be creepy at any age, you're just applying your opinions about it to explain away the behavior.

Bruh it's not the same to be awkward at 20 than 26
At 20 it's ok at 26 youre in age to be paying your fucking mortgage, if you're left over this late into your life you're just trash

Well, all this might just be a way to try and rationalise my own insecurities, but you can't tell me there's no basis at all to my theory.
The same way someone who hasn't learned how to drive by 26 would look weird to me, I assume I would look weird to others for not having learned how to flirt or how to ask girls out.

I know next to no one who was paying mortgage at 26. You sound like you're 15.

holy shit it's not that hard to ask a girl out to do something unless you're actually retarded. anxiety and a huge lack of confidence WILL make you look weird, no matter what the hell you're doing

I have like 3 friends who are already mortgaged lmao (all around my age)

You can have social anxiety in your teens, at this age it's not anxiety it's just being a fucking loser

You are just looking for excuses to not try. You don't actually want to date a girl.

There is no age. No you won't look like a retard. Just be upfront and honest about your intention to spend time with a girl, you don't have to give a full report about your entire love life (or lack thereof) beforehand. If you make out and she likes it, you're good, right?

Then why do I cry myself to sleep thinking about hugging a girl

Still anecdotal evidence. There are whole countries' worth of 25-somethings still living with their parents and not being able to score a steady wage. Don't buy into boomer spooks.

Because you want to wallow in self pity.

But girls can smell out virgins like blood on the water

Lel. Imagine believing this.

I don't know. Around my circle of acquaintances most people seem pretty set and hitting good milestones in life, and I'm just kinda getting left behind.

Who told you that? That's a load of bull

They cant? I mean guys usually move things forward so for a girl who has been in a bunch of relationships already she would have a very easy time telling one is inexperienced.

Virgin is one thing. Being a turbosperg permavirgin is another.

Considering how old I am I would say I'm pretty firmly in the latter.

You're not.(1)

Citations
1.[source: trust me]

You can work on stopping being a turbosperg you know.

How? I mean I'm not like ungroomed or fat or shit like that, just very awkward because I'm super shy

I appreciate the sentiment but I believe I am pretty turbovirgin.

Believe it or not, the same thing as with everything else. Practice. Talk to girls.

Im a girl,Id love it
Virgin too
but boyfriend isnt and it makes me sad to think about him having fucked other girls

>anxiety and a huge lack of confidence
Exactly.
There's no real way to acquire confidence if you've completely failed in something that's so normal and commonplace for literally everyone else.

You are a retard, quality girls do not care about your being a virgin. They do care about the reasons for it (crazy, lazy, cannot take care of yourself physically and/or mentally) and the possible consequences of it (bitter needy hateful self-pitying incel, unrealistic expectations/views about sex or relationships). It is only as much of a problem as you make of it (personal experience).

The point is that it's impossible to stop being all these things, since by this age you don't know anything else.
Therapy usually does fuckall too.

>virgin
>has a bf
Wut.

It's certainly impossible if all you do is whine on an indonesian shrimp farming forum. As another user said above, you just want to wallow in self-pity, not actually put effort into fixing things.
t. went on first date ever at 25

Yeah but hear me out: It's irrelevant if they dislike the cause or the consequence, the fact is that virginity at this age (not just virginity, but zero relationship experience) is a gigantic redflag and any girl would be smart to steer clear of it.

>I believe I am pretty turbovirgin.
I told you to trust me. Face the facts.

It's not effort that is required, it's direction.
I'll put the damn effort damn it, I just don't know where to even start so I can eventually become 'normal'.

The point is, you can fix both causes and consequences and then your virginity is not a problem. Actually you don't even have to fix them completely (nobody is ever without problems), just demonstrate that you are genuinely aware of your issues, do not let them rule over you and are actively working on them. Be honest and upfront about it. Quality girls love honesty and authenticity.

>is a gigantic redflag and any girl would be smart to steer clear of it.
This makes it very clear that your problem is not that girls don't like you. Your problem is that you don't like yourself and don't think that anyone else should like you either. Naturally, that attitude is an instant turn-off for pretty much everyone. Fix your attitude first of all.

I got my first gf at 26

AMA

I got my first gf at 31

AMA

How many boyfriends did you have?

did your gf used to hook up a lot when she was younger?

Well, I think it's something of a vicious cycle. Nobody likes me so I don't like myself so nobody likes me. I don't know where it started, but it's really hard to break from.

I don't even need where to start. Talk to people? I do that. Lift? I do that. Try to be more sociable? I do that. I don't even know what to do anymore to stop hating myself.

Me too.

How many guys did your gf sleep with before you started dating

There are massive amounts of advice on the internet for fixing your life. E.g. 12 rules for life by meme peterson (yes he's a meme and the stuff he says is obvious, but maybe not to you). Specifically for getting girls there's models by mark manson.
The catch is, it's often very hard for people like you to accept that getting girls is not the problem. The problem is that you suck at life and not getting girls is just a symptom of that. Therefore you have to stop trying to address the symptom and work on fixing the root cause instead.

None, I'm not gay.
I don't think my first gf did. I doubt any of my gfs have been that promiscuous either.
Good going bro. Just look at all the seething incels mad at us.

>Nobody likes me so I don't like myself so nobody likes me.
Fuck. This is also me.

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Yeah sorry man, I don't have much experience with fixing that. Did you talk to a therapist?

>Talk to people? I do that. Lift? I do that. Try to be more sociable? I do that.
Do you enjoy these things? Do you have things that make you feel fulfilled and emotionally satisfied? Or can you think of any, other than getting a gf?

I haven't, but I don't think I need one. I mean I'm a normal person socially, just a spergy virgin.

I enjoy doing that. I enjoy talking to people but get anxious when talking one on one. I enjoy the gym and after the gym is one of the few times in the day where I really feel good in general. I've been trying to accept invitations to stuff more, and it's fine, but for example clubbing or going out at night is something I just don't get. I get all tense and can't have fun at all.

But no matter what I always return to this mix of apathy and depression. It's like I can see the improvement but at the end of the day I'm still so far behind I'm like eh, who cares.

Talking to a therapist doesn't mean you're Charles Manson. Sometimes, one session is enough, just to get a disinterested expert's opinion on an everyday spergy virgin situation.

even if your theory about it looking weird to others was true there would be only one way to get better: learning today how to do it because the longer you wait the weirder it gets according to your own philosophy.

plenty of people don't learn how to do basic stuff until they're older. that's fine. humans have a lifespan of like 70 years.

I'm 27 and I don't know how to drive, simply because where I live there's enough public transport to move around and the nearest supermarket isn't 10 miles away from home.

Different strokes for different folks. You're not weird, you're different.

If you hate yourself and have trouble imagining why someone else should like you then it's definitely a problem. One a therapist might help you with. Psychotherapy is not just for diagnosed-crazy people, it's more just having someone to talk to about your problems, someone who knows how to ask the right questions and provide unbiased outside perspective.

>It's like I can see the improvement but at the end of the day I'm still so far behind I'm like eh, who cares.
IKTF. I've been in exactly this place, but it does get better eventually if you keep at it. I don't get clubbing either, but maybe try having more of those one on one conversations. Just skip past the bullshit smalltalk and get into the deep personal stuff. It's great, if you find the right people to talk to.

Nah I don't mean it like that, I mean it more in that there are people who need it more than me, people with actual problems.

How did you get out of it? I don't think I can have a deep personal conversation with someone (I've never had one, actually). It's something I'm just too ashamed of.

>there are people who need it more than me
That doesn't ban you from going to a therapist anyway. Therapists are not picky.

>first base is sex
Dear lord, user. Get off Jow Forums sometimes.

The fiesta girl to make a business out of boyfriend training is gonna get rich as fuck.

>It's something I'm just too ashamed of.
That's why experienced, paid professionals who hear all kinds of things are useful. It's not like you're talking to friends, coworkers, or family.
Try looking at it this way: You might be ashamed of having someone help you through something that you feel you should be able to do yourself, but there's no shame in having a restaurant cook, serve, and clear your food for you even though you could do it yourself.

I'm in a similar situation.
Therapy does fuckall. You go there, you talk, then you're relieved for a little bit then apathy returns by the time you're back home and you're again spending all your waking hours posting frogs on Jow Forums and Jow Forums.
Therapy takes years to fix this kind of deep self-loathing, but at the same time the longer it goes unfixed the more self-loathing is created if that makes sense.

Especially in this incel era

It's a good idea to try to leave therapy with ideas for what to do yourself, between sessions, rather than just getting the boost from having a good listener.

You go to therapy and LISTEN, you don't just talk, you state your situation so you get some feedback, then you get that feedback through your skull and work on it. This is how therapy works.

>How did you get out of it? I don't think I can have a deep personal conversation with someone (I've never had one, actually). It's something I'm just too ashamed of.
I stopped giving as much of a fuck what others might think of me. I am what I am, and if someone does not appreciate that then I move on and find someone who will. People being judgmental of me is their problem, not mine. Unfortunately it's way easier said than done and convincing your subconscious of this takes a very long time.

Therapy, by itself, cannot fix you. You have to fix yourself. Therapy can point you at issues to fix, or teach you the ways to fix them, but in the end it's you who has to do the work.

Not user but ig it looks childish
If shes into casual stuff then sure, I think its cute

lmao imagine believing this

have you not heard of Hugh Hefner? it's literally when you die.

I think therapy would make it even worse because I would just cling to the therapist and believe someone actually gave a fuck about me, but it's just cause I'm paying them money.

They're trained for that too.
Therapy is a valid avenue of actually improving your personal situation. I encourage you to try it. You can't know until you try.

Where do you even get therapy?

you are just trash though

I started at 24, never kissed or even held a girls hand before then, now I have to live with knowing what loves perfect ache feels like and not having it

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"Mental health care professionals"
They aren't hard to find.
Google therapist.

Yes

>$150/hr
fug

guess ill just keep probing Jow Forums for advice

Yeah.
Having insurance helps reduce that considerably.

You'd be paying a hell of a lot more for insurance if it isn't already provided than you'd save by paying copays.

OP I'm a 26khv. The reason I've never had a gf is the same reason why I have not pursued the rest of my dreams. No to low self-esteem confidence. Totally ruins me. But if you work on your body like I have done (still dyel) people will think that you are a confident dude. And girls like that. But they also can figure out I'm still a hesitant pussy cuz I'm a voicelet and stutter. Good luck just talk to a girl and things will get better

Where do I find girls

Outside of your home, wherever people are.

Maybe.

You can also try a number of self-help books dealing with shame and self-confidence. But nearly all of those are written to make money. Some are good and actually provide some good advice even though they are just written to make money. But I can't help you with a specific one unfortunately.

No. What do you even mean? You think you are unique or the last person to start? News flash: there's always someone better and someone worse. More importantly there's new adults everyday. Actually it should be easier for you because girls like older guys. When girls are young older guys make them feel more mature, and when they're more mature older guys make them feel young. Enjoy make sure to have a car, a place to fuck, and money to do shit.

you lie, fake it till you make it

i am so sexually repressed the shame alone makes it almost impossible to pursue women. i am horny all day and night and somehow i cannot admit to my own sexuality, i hate to be seen as a sexual being, it feels vulnerable, though i'm not sure what exactly i'm afraid of, it's not only the possibility of failure, it's being sexual at all, and even thought i know it is natural it feels like i was not meant to be sexual but more than anything i want to be