can y'all post your breakup stories?
>breakup is still fresh
>nothing is really helping atm
>really just wanna hear about other people who went through similar pain
can y'all post your breakup stories?
>breakup is still fresh
>nothing is really helping atm
>really just wanna hear about other people who went through similar pain
LDR for 6 months
Spent 2 months traveling around, making a lot of memories and seeing a lot of beauty
LDR for a year
Moved in together and planned on getting married
Her parents did everything they could to stop it from happening
In the end they won and I went back home, but she kept emailing me saying she loved me
I went no contact to try to heal and after a month of dreaming about her and thinking about her constantly I emailed her again to see if we could ever see each other again.
She replied saying she was "moving on"
This was a relationship where "I will always love you" and "i will never leave you" were uttered daily.
Well 3 months have passed. I have a new girl that keeps me company prior to basic training, though i still dream about her and think about her often. Today at work my buddy said it once took him 2 years to get over a girl. Ultimately all i can do is wait for the day to be over, and pray i dont dream about her. I'm trying my best to feel something for the new girl, but she's less physically attractive and hasn't opened up to me much so it's difficult.
So to help you, all I can say is, find other girls and wait. Dont contact her again. I was feeling better the day before I contacted her, after she said she was moving on I felt awful for weeks and still do (even though the day before I was 100% I'd never see her again.)
Looking back I can say that her self harm, our codependency, her threats of suicide and our frequent arguing made the relationship impossible. It doesn't stop me from thinking about her very frequently.
Anybody that reads this thread and has advice for me;
How do i look past the new girls flat ass into the fact that she gave up her virginity to me and is actually a decent person? I feel like having good passionate sex would help me out and this girl is above average attractiveness, it's just that the last ones model tier looks have skewed my perception.
go fuck ten other women. it’s a numbers game
>now I am finally free time to conquer earth
I took this girls virginity I dont wanna fuck other women. Besides I'm leaving real soon
Break up 8 times
Finally last one
Feel like she died
She wanna talk still
Fuck off, blocked
Drink heavily and sleep with really questionable women for two years
Woman asks me out
Just the stuff close to the breakup
>She complains not enough sex, I'm tired out of my and depressed but make the mistake saying it's weed, more likely that she was super selfish in bed while also super judgemental
>Want to see her to show her I can rise to the occasion, she flakes the first time and falls asleep the second
>she wants to see a movie and I suggest every date possible, even ruining my schedule and she refuses so I decided to go the dentist on saturday, ask her multiple times on several days if that's all right as Saturday's the last day for that movie - go ahead
>saturday comes and I spend all the time before the dentist anxious out of my mind, see my brother for a total of 10 minutes before that, agree with her to see immediately afterwards
>When we meet she starts putting me down saying I chose the dentist and my brother over her and how she won't see the movie ever now, more talk how I'm a terrible person etc. We argue more
>Go to her apartment and she starts talking shit about me seeing my brother again I lose my shit, throw my favorite lighter to the ground and break it, see there's no point and leave
>A week later we meet and she's all nice and supportive acting like it's no big deal
>Tell her I'm done, I can't continue living like that where it's all good then everything we agreed is my fault and falls on my head, especially the part about my brother when I met him because she didn't want to. When we're leaving I say that I stil think she's hot and she says the same, we fuck
>Tomorrow morning she blows up my phone crying and being a total mess
I regret investing the time, and more importantly the emotion for such a manipulative cunt that won't believe me anything I say and holds it over my head. Fuck that.
this will start by sounding stupid as fuck but trust there's a good end here.
LDR for three years.
three. was my longest relationship, from ages 14/15-18
never met, can't even call it a LDR but whatever. we always tried to talk about meeting but it never went far. beating our fourth anniversary he dumps me for an IRL girl saying he didn't feel the same anymore. it definitely hurt because despite never meeting, that was three whole years of my life and prominent teenage years dedicated to one person.
get into another LDR, current boyfriend (here we go)
he flies across the country to meet me within months after light joking from both sides at first. my family likes him and we're planning a visit for me to go see him next summer. he's treated me so much better than my ex devastated me.
after a breakup there is always better. take some time to heal yourself and focus on you and what you want to do. something better will come your way without even looking for it.
Not much to say. Gf a few years ago had been fucking my “best friend” without me knowing for a few weeks. I saw notifications on her phone screen from him. I then snooped a little, found generic sexual shit. I decided one day I’d leave for work one day but instead just drove down the block and parked. Waited, looking for either his car to come in or hers to leave. Saw his pull up, him get out and go inside. I waited a while, walked down the block, and went in. Heard pounding from the outside and moans once I got in. Walked upstairs, opened and stood in the doorway a minute then walked out. Never talked to her again, left all my shit at the house, and left her to pay the rest of the lease.
Haven’t had the desire to have another relationship or even sex since then.
Such is life
>first argument with gf who can’t communicate
>things are really tense the next two days
>she breaks up with me over text
>just say alright I understand and gtfo
>giving her a week to call her bluff before I start moving on
>in the meantime just hitting the gym heavy, yoga and my studies
God damn brother. Makes my little breakup seems like a walk in the park. Godspeed user.
Prior relationship was 2 years of on and off again dating with this guy from my dorm. We drank a lot and hooked up a lot and constantly went back and forth from dating to not dating. I honestly don't remember the breakup or most of the relationship because my memory is shitty now. I met my recent ex who I will post about next on a whim after a few months of officially being done with the on and off again guy. I literally just went out one night with my roommate like "you have to put yourself out there to meet people" and I went to a random frat party and I saw my recent ex there. I've never done this before but I approached him and said hi and we hit it off from there.
Not all girls are like that.
I wrote out a long winded response to this about how that prior ex wound up making me go nocontact but that's not the real breakup story.
My current ex was that guy from the frat party. We became exclusive by the end of that summer, I spent all of my time with him because I had lost all of my dorm friends because I integrated them with my last ex. I spent that whole summer with this new boy's friends, and things were perfect. I thought I was gonna marry this man and he and his friends were the picture perfect images of how friends should be. Turned out he had communication issues, would just not be honest about how he felt, had drinking issues, had depression, and this culminated in him yelling at me during a fight as we walked home from a party. We go our separate ways, the next morning he sits me down and tells me he never loved me. This is 6 months after we started being a couple.
>I never had a gf
Even if that were true, which it isn’t, I’d have to have the desire to care, which I don’t. Believe me, my parents and friends all said the same thing. But the drive to deal with women is now gone. I’ve had my fill.
That's when he revealed he had depression and he was purposely sabotaging the relationship because he was leaving for grad school in the summer and didn't think it would happen, so why not just put it out of it's misery? We talk for hours and he agrees to get help for his depression. I recommend a book for his depression that helped me with my anxiety. He says he read it. Find out later he did not. He goes off to grad school, we're long distance for a year (my last year of college) and I visit regularly. Every time I visit on the last day we wind up drinking and getting into a horrible fight. The fights are triggered by anything, he gets angry when he's drunk and I stop being passive. This fight was brought on by me saying that he should care about a random stranger and he says he shouldn't and that I'm putting a random stranger over his word by saying that? he gets more and more angry and I start crying saying this is not normal. He starts yelling at me, I'm embarrassing him in front of his friends (on a bar crawl first time meeting his new friends in grad school by the way!) I ask them if this is normal and one of them does a loooong conflict resolution thing. We go home and are fighting in the uber. We get back to his apartment and he's yelling at me, kicks me out and tells me to sleep in the car.
I come back in the morning and we make up but that was the worst fight ever in our relationship, and I completely blew my reputation among his friends. As I'm talking to him I SEE CUTS ON HIS WRIST. He apparently cut himself when I was in the car but stopped immediately. I flew home knowing it was over. We had planned that I would move to where he was living when I graduated but it seemed like we'd break up. Things suddenly get better, he pressures me into a lease one day when we were only just looking at places ("oh I have to renew now for my 1 bedroom studio so if you don't sign onto this apartment we were looking at RIGHT NOW then my rent will be higher!") and suddenly we're planning on moving in together. It's been 2 years so that makes sense but I was extremely reluctant.
LOOONG story short
>He loses interest and breaks up with me again by the end of that summer
>Asks for me back a week later
>I consider it for about a month, whether or not to move in with him
>figure I'd regret it for the rest of my life if I don't at least try
>Move away from family across the country for the first time
>Have sex once when I move in, never again
>Fighting still just as bad
>Thank god I got my own bedroom
>He just gets upset when he drinks
>Tells me to sleep in car bc he pays majority of the rent
>It's snowing outside
>Have to ask to be let in bc I'll freeze
>This exact thing happens again, but I stand up for myself and lock myself in my bedroom
>I take the water jug bc hangover
>He bangs on the door an hour later asking for it
Jesus girl. Value yourself a little more. Learn to be a better judge of character
>Met her about 3.5yrs ago.
>We were both single when we met, but lived on opposite sides of the state, never really got together, but we liked each other alot. Lots of Texting.
>Fast-forward 3 months.
>She gets a douchebag for a boyfriend.
>I still talk to her everyday for the next 6 months, helping her with her shitty relationship.
>She decides she loves me and breaks up with douchebag for me.
>We have a very fulfilling relationship for 2 years.
>I have to take a higher paying position at my job to pay bills, can't find better work.
>Job keeps us apart, sex life is severely punished, we see each other maybe once a week. (Again she lives on the other side of the state)
>Work makes my depression worse, so i want to do less and less but sleeping.
>her anxiety triggers and she feels like I'm abandoning her.
>Job keeps shitting all over me, makes me miserable.
>She becomes so sexually frustrated, she cheats on me twice in 2 weeks.
>I would've never found out, but she was so consumed with guilt she breaks up with me and tells me the whole thing.
>We're broken up for about a month. I hated my job so much I had to quit. It ruined me and my relationship.
>We reconciled around Thanksgiving last year, I loved her. i was willing to forgive and move forward, I made finding a job, my full time job.
>We're back together, things are good.
>A few months go by and I cant find a good job.
>I want something substantial, not a minimum wage waste of time to front bills.
>She gets frustrated that I'm still not working.
>She feels like I'm not trying, that she cant inspire me to try.
>She grows to hate that my depressed ass wont try to fix things to live a life with her,
>She dumped me almost two months ago, she wasn't happy with herself, was scared shed cheat again and decided to spare me that pain.
I miss her so much. I really wanted everything she wanted. But I was always too afraid to make promises of Marriage and family if I had no job to secure it.
Hope that helps.
Wat. Was that the same chick?
The sleeping in car stuff is what happened during a fight, sorry I realize there's no transition to it now that I'm reading it.
>yells at me for like half an hour about it standing in my room, won't let me leave.
>try to walk him away and get to the kitchen to put the jug back.
>he pours it over my head and he kicks me out again, I go to my car but then eventually go back into apartment and sleep in room
>for months I mull over breaking up because this seems like breaking a physical barrier into abuse and I tell him that this is not ok but internally not sure if I'm overthinking it while completely looking over the mounds of emotional abuse
>4 months later we break up, but decide to be civil and live together and we'll just be roomates
>fine for two weeks
>first time drinking together the night is fine, everything is ok
>when we get home we have a little argument
>he's bawling and I thought he was faking so I tell him that and I lie down on the couch.
>he stares at me and jumps on me and chokes me
>tell him I can't breathe, try to get him off of me but I can't
>is this it, do i die here, why did i stay, why did i not stop before things got this bad, ect.
>this was all about like 2-3 seconds, he stops.
I won't go into the details but essentially the next day I told him I won't get the police involved, ect. and I know he's a good person and I'm sad it ended like this but I have to go. I book a hotel and make sure he doesn't know where I am/can't find me and I contact my family. I don't have any marks on me but I can't eat the first day. I don't have health insurance or (a job) so I never got checked out. I wait till he's out at work the next day and pack up all my stuff, and move out the next day. I move back in with my parents and start working retail. This was this past April.
>5 years ago
>2 and a half years together, my first everything
>dropped the bomb one day. Didn't want to talk, didn't want to try. Gave me the bullshit lines.
>it's not me it's you
I was angry. I wish she would've told me what was wrong with me. I wish she would've helped me grow as a person. I had to do that on my own. I still haven't talked to her. I still have her super Nintendo, too.
>2 months later
>met a cute grill
>traditional in private life, but wants to be a doctor
>just got married
It gets better though. I promise
That's some serious self-restrain, I would have beaten up his ass maybe both their asses.
wait till you learn how wrong you are
Nah man. I braved myself after the texts. My first major defeat in life. If things were worse for me I probably would have but I honestly didn’t feel angry, just disappointment. Sadness for a split second. Then I stopped feeling much for a good while. Now I’m mostly back to normal but any time I think back to then it brings back that disappointment
So when I moved back home we stayed in contact.
>April move back home
>still text each other daily, I have hundreds of pics of him from the past 3 years on my phone, I have LITERALLY less than 5 pictures of just myself from the past 3 years.
>bedroom littered with reminders of him
>I manage to get a retail job immediately after being unemployed since moving in with my ex
>After a month I get my old summer job from college back for the summer
>I start deleting pictures of him from my phone, destroy all the memorabilia.
>I was actually processing this well, best mental health I've had in years, lowest anxiety in years
>Realize I've been a shell of a human for years, I was so concerned with him that I had no personality anymore, he consumed my life during college and then after
>He gets new roomates
>He tells me a day before that he's visiting his family and wants to drop stuff off to me (I told him he could throw it out months ago)
>I tell my parents that we should go to dinner at the time he's going to be there (they do not know) but he moves the day on me and it works out so nobody's home and he just dumps all my stuff out in front of my parents house (they were fine with it but just confused)
>Sadness creeps in about a month or two ago about relationship, he was never physically abusive this entire time and I from that moment I saw him thought he was perfect, that I was going to marry him, ect.
>He is the only person who texts/snaps/tags me daily but we're growing apart as we should be
>I'm extremely lonely, living in my parents house in my childhood bedroom, lost all my friends from college, a year from graduating college in the same damn situation I was when I graduated
>only with less money, and a 6 month gap when I moved away in my resume
Sorry for the massive amount of posts. When I started to write this out I felt the need to continue and this is the first time I've realized how jumbled my memories of our fights are. I know this isn't a blog I just figure it could help others.
>This is where I am now:
He texts me every day, I think I loved him but my rose colored glasses ignored the reality of who he was. I've learned massive amounts of things about myself, who I want in a partner, what I don't, red flags, and so much more from this relationship. I have grown immensely, and I am the most grounded I have been in years. I can't deny my contribution to the toxicity of this relationship but he was also exceptionally fucked up. I was fucked up though for deciding to stay and I clearly had personal issues since I jumped so quickly into the relationship and melded myself so much to appease this man. We very publicly broke up before moving in because I had to explain to my family I wasn't moving away (as we planned to for months) and had no idea that he ask for me back a week later.
Essentially my life on paper is shit right now, my ex is the only person who texts me, and I need to get a new job, but mentally and internally I'm in the best place of my life.
I was in a relationship with this person for some years. It was a long distance relationship but we were cool with it. First year was fine, after some time he starts getting paranoid and we only spend time at his place doing nothing. He plays videogames I lay on bed watching movies. For a couple days it's fine, for fucking years it's boring and depressing. He starts with things like "I don't like you to hang out with your friends I get jealous bc I can't be with you" "I just don't understand how you like going to bars and stuff, it's boring af". He was getting more and more hikikomori with time. Sex life is awful, his jealousy is making me despise him. After some time I don't even find him attractive anymore but I do love him so I feel frustrated. He starts getting more and more paranoid. Eventually he confesses that he has gone through my phone to check if I was cheating on him. Never did, just took a selfie for me. He went berserk bc of the fucking selfie. I realised I had no privacy at all, he knew my passwords, I sent him all my pictures, he even texted my friends. Broke up bc of the phone shit, never looked back. Fucking toxic relationship.
>dating this girl in college
>she's got some serious SERIOUS jealousy issues but I'd never been in a real relationship before, so I had no idea how an adult relationship is supposed to work
>I'm friends with a lot of females through school, work, etc
>she's been cheated on by a guy who told her he was "just friends" with some girls
>she doesn't want me being friends or having any sort of contact with ANY women besides her and my mom
>I think that this is just how relationships are, you cut contact with other women
once you get a gf
>fastforward a few months
>women I work with and am friends with ask me why we're no longer friends on fb and they can't send me snaps anymore
>think that my phone is glitching and tell them that something weird must be going on
>think nothing of it
>one morning I wake up to her going through my phone
>watch her deleting women's phone numbers, unfriending them on fb and snap, unfollowing on insta
>don't say anything, but remember it
>later that day
>casually say that someone asked me about it
>she doesn't say anything
>ask her point blank if she knows why that might happen
>she says she has no idea
>tell her I watched her do that
>she starts to cry
>I'm incapable of arguing with a crying person, so I stop and tell her I'm done talking about it
>fast forward a few days
>she sends me a text while I'm at my house taking a nap, so I don't respond
>she needs something from my house, so she drives over and walks into my room and sees me asleep
>wakes me up and tells me that "you're unbelievable" because I didn't respond to her text and took a nap instead of texting her back and leaves
>texts me "we're done"
>call her and tell her that's fine
>tell her again that that's fine
>she tells me to come over to her house to get my stuff
>I drive over
>she's there crying
>begs me to not break up with her
>tell her I'm not changing my mind
>she just stands in front of me crying, not letting me walk anywhere
>eventually I juke my way into her bedroom
>get all of my shirts that she had and go to leave
>she blocks the front door, knowing I won't push her or do anything like that
>pick her up by the armpits
>rotate 90degrees and put her down
>block her on everything and restore as many people's numbers and social media as I could think of
It's unreal how much my quality of life improved literally overnight from having a crazy overbearing gf to just being single. I'd rather be single forever than deal with another girl like that
So what does it take to be one of those couples that actually makes it past the first year, let alone into marriage snd old age.
Just getting a gf that is stable is difficult enough.
Be born at least 70 years ago, although the further back you go the better
>together 7 years
>have a son early on
>ups and downs like any relationship
>finally have the money to give her the wedding I thought she deserved
>she says yes when I pop the question
>go away for a couple days, have huge week long vacation planned with her when I get back
>train ride back home I recieve photos of her with some other faggot
Fast forward two years later and I still want to eat a bullet over her.
God damn. Did you just pack up and leave?
> Together since high school
> I have been severely depressed and just a shitty guy to be around; she has her own stuff to deal with and cannot support me anymore
> she breaks up a couple days after the eight years mark saying she doesn't love me anymore
> she goes no contact
> not dealing with it well
> realize what's wrong and start working on bettering myself
> fast forward four months
> we meet early August to talk
> we still feel heavily for each other and she is very upset that she had to breakup with me for me to fix things
> we keep in contact
> make out once
> we both regret it and decided to stop talking to each other
> wait nah let's keep talking
> we kinda go back to dating
> but no not really she is very confused about being together - she loves me, I love her but she has doubts and doesn't really trust me anymore
> we decide again it's best to let each other go
> end up fucking a lot of course
> tell her if she makes up her mind one day and want to be a couple again I'd be up for it but this fuckbuddies thing is only hurting us both
> we both decide to put an end to this - we said our goodbyes, to each its own
> she tried talking to me again but I end up shutting her down. Take your time and be decisive otherwise leave me be.
> last saturday was probably the last time I will ever hear from her again
She was everything to me and I still love her a lot. I'll probably never stop loving her but such is life. It's been months since the official breakup and I haven't gathered the courage to approach no one. I'll just keep chilling out lonely till the day of my death lmao.
No, but she did. I ended up with custody of our son and she's pretty much homeless these days. Not sure if I still love her or if I'm just messed up by the whole ordeal.