a part of me feels a bit freaked out about my boyfriend's attitude towards sex. and by that i mean im worried im going to dig through his phone one day and see kid porn or some shit
- openly admitted he was a pervert within a month of knowing me. -said he tried to make a move on his cousin at one point. his cousin freaked out and -said he'd love to film a porn with me - seriously wanted to have sex in the back of his friend's car in broad daylight, in public - when he first met me he was talking really raunchy to me and it made me super uncomfortable and i had to tell him to stop. - when i first met him he said sex was 'super important'. and that he wanted a girl who was adventurous in bed or whatever and if i wasnt like that it'd be a deal breaker. - he has wanted to be polyamorous (not judging people like this but this could be something a sex addict could say to cover their sex addiction ) - in a conversation when we were talking about work he said his primary motivation is 'mating' -in the past he said he had a really bad fapping problem in highschool, that was 12 years ago though, so maybe its not a concern? -when he first met me he thought i was transexual but still wanted to get a room with me (presumably to fuck lbr) he thought i was trans because of a mistake i made on my dating profile information. - made a really disgusting incest 'joke' about me and my dad. extremely gross and again i had to tell him to stop.i dont even want to talk about it it was sthat disgusting. -in broad daylight he wanted to bang in the back of his friend's car where it was super likely other people would walk by. do anons feel like this behaviour is normal for dudes? am i just being paranoid?
He sounds like he has some very deeply engrained, disordered perceptions around sex and has lost perspective on what normal sexuality it, likely from decades of consuming more and more extreme varieties of porn daily from puberty to today. No his behavior isn’t normal for guys, it really betrays a very grotesque psyche and you’re right to be concerned that you might find him with CP one day.
Not normal Dump dump dump
Ok how the fuck is this guy your boyfriend, I would expect someone like this to be dating another degenerate like themselves, is he like really hot or something
This dude sounds horribly insecure and is thinks that being a sex God will make him feel better. He's going to keep pushing your boundaries. Dump him. You sound chill and decent and could do way better
No, it's normal for pervs. A lot of guys are pervs. He's an idiot probably not kid material. That doesn't mean he's not a good time. Have crazy sex till it becomes boring then leave.
>normal? No, he's a freak babe My bf has a typical sex drive and has said or done zero of the things you listed. I don't know how to describe what yours thinks sex is but it doesn't seem like intimacy to me at all. It seems like something that leads to a prison stint tbqh >bad fapping in hs not a problem? Par for the course. A history of poor self control as it relates to sex. Quite honestly these are things that go beyond self control and a bit into "why would you even imagine that" territory
Wow I unno dude. Have you tried surfing?
Classic cumbrain symptoms, coupled with the autism to say it out loud. Basically he's probably fucked and needs therapy for whatever sent him down there porn rabbit hole
yeah and he is almost in his mid 30s this isn't a horny teenager we're talking about this is a guy who has a decent position at his job who has a decent education is seemingly pretty family oriented and is close to his mom responsible with finances etc etc
and yeah its hard for me to even talk about i think my brain blocked out the joke thats how gross it was but his response to me saying i didnt' like his incest joke was 'yeah why is that a big deal its just a joke, i have lots of anime friends who would think thats funny'
and not only that but he even admitted to me that he has an addictive perosnality or had some trouble or osmething being addicted to league of legends. so i feel like he could be addicted to sex or at least have that 'addictive personality' disorder or whatever the hell it is that some people have where they just can't get enough of something. and he's so socially unaware (it seems at least im not a doctor) that he thought it was okay to honestly tell me that its likely that he could actually get addicted to me.
not sure if he was joking or not but it just felt like he was serious
what confuses me is that he has so many other good qualities...
well, to be honest he's not. he's kind of on the short side, has some skin problems but works out a lot so he's nowhere near fat.hair's a little thin but i honestly dgaf about that. like i said earlier he has a good position at his job...he's definitely otaku though so his social awareness is off sometimes to be honest not trying to be mean. im probably a little off sometimes myself too but i wanna say i dont have any deeply ingrained psychological problems? not sure if self diagnosis is something that makes sense to do though so who knows.
i told him the other day, "look, incest shit is fucking gross and i didn't appreciate the joke you made about me and my dad. that crap is heavy in the dealbreaker territory for me." and his response was 'well im cool most of the time, you'd really break up with me just for a small joke like that? "
how the fuck is making an incest joke about someone you've met 5 times a good fucking idea? like are you fucking kidding me? idiot.fuck just thinking about it pisses me off.
im actually not sure why im still with this dude. im just terrified of being single i guess...and he's the first guy that sends me paragraphs and paragraphs of advice and positive affirmations and buys me everything and no he doesn't look like george clooney but he has beautiful green eyes and a calm voice i dunno...
This, the guy needs counseling. His views on sex are not normal. Tell him to get help before it gets out of hand.
im so confused anons ugh
Stop caring about incest. I do it with my cousin too, things like that happen all the time it's just that people tend to shut the fuck up about it. I'm also a pervert but you are right he's acting too blunt to just be a pervert, he's also has trouble being sociable he's probably young as well and doesn't know what he wants (hence the sex is super important but then doesnt make it an actual deal breaker, that's because he's insecure) honestly you've seen enough of him to know him, tell him. this and tell him there's something up and you want to help him
>well, to be honest he's not. he's kind of on the short side, has some skin problems
>I'm actually not sure why im still with this dude.
>like i said earlier he has a good position at his job
Sounds a bit gold diggey OP.
The best that can be said of him is that he is really really inept at expressing what might not be all-that-bad sexual impulses. The worst is that he has no censors and boundaries, and that inappropriate talk could turn into inappropriate action.
In either case he's going to be hard work. Is he worth it?
>- openly admitted he was a pervert within a month of knowing me. Yeah, that's odd. When I was was with my current gf I was discovering new fetishes and stuff, but within a month?? Red flag. >-said he tried to make a move on his cousin at one point Why would he even tell you this? Red flag. >-said he'd love to film a porn with me Normal. Goes through every young man's mind at some point. >- seriously wanted to have sex in the back of his friend's car in broad daylight, in public Me and my gf had a little bit of car fun back in the day, but did our best to do it on the downlow. Kinda odd. >- when he first met me he was talking really raunchy to me Give examples, regardless, inappropriate. >- when i first met him he said sex was 'super important'. and that he wanted a girl who was adventurous in bed or whatever and if i wasnt like that it'd be a deal breaker. Yeah, fuck him and his requirements. This alone should be reason for you to tell him to fuck off. >- he has wanted to be polyamorous (not judging people like this but this could be something a sex addict could say to cover their sex addiction) Yeah... I had a slight phase when I was in college when I thought of this too. The thoughts eventually passed. I'll give him a pass.
>- in a conversation when we were talking about work he said his primary motivation is 'mating' I don't know what to make of this. I think he's a fucking major autist. >-in the past he said he had a really bad fapping problem in highschool Every teen goes through that. Hell, I went through that again (not very long ago) when I started some meds. >-when he first met me he thought i was transexual but still wanted to get a room with me He's a fucking degenerate. Use protection and check yourself for STDs >- made a really disgusting incest 'joke' about me and my dad. Been there, done that. The joke I mean. It was sort of part of a conversation where incest was the only logical explanation, again I made it as a joke and no one was butthurt, but if he just said it out of nowhere, red flag.
All in all, it seems like he is a major fucking creep (even by my personal standards) and I'd say move on. Just be careful, stick with friends/family and make sure he doesn't have any guns before you break things off. Also, this seems like pretty decent logic and explains me a little bit lol
He's seemingly trying to force parts of his sexuality upon you and has shown a history of doing so (cousin), that's a huge red flag. The specific incidents individually I wouldn't worry about, it's the attitude and frequency that worries.
>even this degenerate weirdo can get a gf because he's Chad enough >I will probably die a virgin Fuck, I wish I could find confidence somehow.
The problem isn't that he has weird kinks but that he clearly doesn't respect other people's boundaries which is suuuuuuuuuuuper shitty and dangerous. Run, run, run. It only gets worse from here.
Those are all red flags. Cut your losses and find someone else. This dudes fucked.
What is he doing that you’re not? Being himself, fuck it even if op dumps this guys he’s pretty based