How to connect with normies?

I am an ambitious guy with passion for techology, sport, health and fitness. I go to the gym daily, take care of my eating/drinking/sleep, and generally try to live a good life.

Recently I've been trying to connect better with my friends and coworkers, so I make an effort to hang around them more.

The problem is that a lot of them are soulless NPCs with no ambition, no interests and no concerns, only talking about how much they drank last night, and what club they will hit tonight.

I feel out of place trying to talk about my passions, and so I usually keep quiet and just laugh at their jokes and try to blend in.

I want to widen my friend/acquaintance circle, but I really can't find common ground with most people.

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Aren't you a special snowflake. So much smarter and better than everyone else.

This type of comments is exactly the reason I can't connect with normies. If I start talking about my ambitions, they get salty because they don't want to put the effort, and just cast me away as the overcompensating/tryhard guy.

And it's not like I despise or hate them. I want to be their friend, but changing them is impossible, and changing myself is not something I want to do either.

So I am eternaly doomed to be that weird guy who doesn't drink, doesn't smoke, doesn't do drugs, doesn't have 5 hours every day to spend on socializing and drinking

You're kinda proving the point there. When someone points out you are being an arrogant ass, you immediately get defensive and start insulting him and calling him a NPC or normie or whatever.

At least you try and can talk to normies. I refuse to but also am unable to. I’ve largely overcome my “desires” (more so “curiosity”) to get friends and socialization and have fully accepted the life as a social isolate. The biggest problem I foresee is that when it comes time for jobs and such I will not have references or connections. This is probably an issue for you but I think I can find ways to survive

How the fuck is he being “arrogant”?

Are you autistic? His posts ooze with narcissism.

Just accept your fate

Most people are soulless clones whos only reason for living is to drink and watch TV

They only have jobs to achieve those two goals

You cannot change them, either accept it, or become an NPC yourself

>I am an ambitious guy
>a lot of them are soulless NPCs
No one wants be friends with someone who looks at them as an NPC

I didn't really call (you) an NPC, since I don't know you, hence I can't make that conclusion.

I might have come off as an arrogant asshole who is better than everyone, but that wasn't really my intention with this thread.

The point is most people are content with coasting through life without much effort to improve (which is fine, I am not condemning them), I just can't connect with them because of my drastically different lifestyle and philosophy, and am asking for advice.

You are trying to build a gap between yourself and everyone else by thinking you are so different. Instead of acting like a special snowflake find things you have in common. You sound like a pretty boring guy honestly, loosen up a bit.

Spotted the NPC.

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>oozes
So does yours

Getting jobs isn't the problem, since I can actually connect easily with like-minded individuals from my industry, and have actually achieved a wide circle of professional connections.

Getting friends and girlfriends on the other hand, is much more difficult. Probably because I have a bias towards highly-driven people who are constantly looking to improve, and they seem to be a rare breed.

You sound like this arrogant friend I have. He's real smart and strong and does all kinds of things, but in the end, the only reason he gets girls is because he's pushy as fuck and those girls are desparate. Even though he's not bad looking, he won't be able to get a girl at the same level as his, because he is an arrogant little prick and acts that way. I'm still not sure if it's autism or not.
You should stop trying to change people and try to be less of a showoff, people try and they hate it when some faggot walks up to them and starts claiming he's doing alot more than them and they shouldn't be salty..

This is the most incoherent thing I’ve read today

Not that user, but he was replying to someone and didn't insult or brag while doing so. OP has bragged in two posts already..

Yeah, that makes sense. I’ve moved past friends and gfs (not like I really had a choice) but I can imagine searching for people like you to connect with is difficult. All I can say is good luck

Where has he “bragged”? Saying he’s motivated?

You sound like a cunt yourself. You aren't any better than the OP you claim is an ass.

As far as OP goes, find people with similar interest and fuck the normies. There is no point in socializing with them unless you plan to network with them or keep the peace in your work enviorments.

You'll find actual connection when you seek out places with people who hold your interesr. I'd try meetup.com or something

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>I might have come off as an arrogant asshole who is better than everyone
You did.
>The point is most people are content with coasting through life without much effort to improve
You have no idea about that, just because of some millenial memes doesn't mean it's all true, but your arrogance won't let you accept that
>which is fine, I am not condemning them
yeah obviously you're not condemning anyone by considering them npc's and low-effort :^)
>I just can't connect with them because of my drastically different lifestyle and philosophy
bullshit, you're just autistic and not charming

Don’t listen to this retard, in his world sport and health is a snowflake thing

Sounds like you are just butthurt OP is trying to improve himself and you are a bitter cunt about it

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>I am an ambitious guy with passion for techology, sport, health and fitness. I go to the gym daily, take care of my eating/drinking/sleep, and generally try to live a good life.
>The problem is that a lot of them are soulless NPCs with no ambition, no interests and no concerns
>I feel out of place trying to talk about my passions
>If I start talking about my ambitions, they get salty
user these posts are filled with soft self-compliments and soft-insults towards the other
it's narcissism all around

This lmao
Normie Internet Defense Force didn't send their best today

That's exactly my point. I don't want to be that guy. I don't go to the gym so I can flex on normies, I don't pursue my carrier so I can be richer than them, I don't pursue girls just so I can increase my bodycount. I do all of this for myself and to improve my quality of life.

As I already said, when socializing I usually don't talk about these things unless asked directly, because it just comes off as narcisistic.

But on the other hand I also can't talk about the usual topics of how many beers I had yesterday, or how little sleep I got this week, or how unhealthy I've been eating this month.

So in the end I just stay quiet, and become the boring quiet guy.

Fuck em. You don’t need those people. Believe me; you’re not missing anything.

For fucks sake OP, ignore the butthurt normie. He's just angry he lacks the motivation to improve his life, so he is taking it on you and trying to make you feel bad for getting shit done

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OP here, I have nothing to gain from bragging on an anonymous chinese cartoon forum.

I only *bragged* to give context for my situation, so I can get better advice.

In real life I am the shy quiet type. I am by no means the narcissistic pushy guy.

All I want is to make some more meaningful connections with my coworkers and friends

sure thing sweety

How about gym bros? They share same the interests as you do

how am I butthurt? I just see his actions and they compare fully to this friendl of mine who was an arrogant prick

Because you keep calling him a “special snowflake” when all he has done is explain how he sees his situation. Is anyone asking for advice narcissistic because they use the word “I”?

Why do you hang out with such boring low class people?

If op is a snowflake normie like you say I’d rather be him than you at least he’s trying to improve

That sound like good advice, thanks. I guess I am just worried that if I only pursue similar people as myself I might get stuck in some niche community and lose even that small connection with the outside world I have.

I am usually very difficult with connecting with random people (esspetially girls), but am trying to work on it daily.

Keep it down there with the hyperbole buddy. You are going ballistic at things that aren't there but you imagine them.

What would people similar to yourself be like?

Just trying to understand what’s going on in your head. Maybe you aren’t a normie because this is not normal at all

Uh, OP is obviously a narcissist and arrogant. What is the question here?

I am a programmer by profession, and am into nerdy stuff like technology, gaming, anime, etc...

For the first 20 years of my life I was the stereotypical nerd kid.

But recently (last 2-3 years) I've made a big effort to improve my outside appearance. I started going to the gym, started dressing with better fitting clothes, shower daily, always clean, cut my hair and face hair regularly, watch my posture, etc...

However my lack of good socializing in my teens has left me socially awkward, and generally distrusting of new people.

Even though now I look much better, and get much more attention from people, I am still traumatized and inexperienced from my early life, and very slow to open up to new people.

>t. Licensed psychologist

OP here, let me rephrase my question.

Is it possible to live a healthy and ambitious life (8h sleep, 8h work, 2h gym, 1h side-projects every day) and in the same time maintain good relationships with multiple circles of friends, coworkers and family.

I am trying to keep all this things in balance, but kinda feel stretched out in all directions.

I am a programmer into nerdy stuff and do socialize with my friends about things like vidya. And I don't think I would enjoy talking to you, you just sound so self-centered and boring.

Sounds like you gotta loosen up and learn how to have some fun. And understand that interests don't equal fun. Just randomly ask these guys to take you clubbing sometime. They're gonna love that and will usually pick out the weirdest places and do the weirdest shit because there's a newbie. You don't need alcohol or drugs to have fun. Most of my friends use drugs just to be able to keep dancing. I just hit the gym, so my endurance is good enough. Although I must say, if you go without alcohol there must be a hint of passion at least. Go and get into some EDM genre like house or techno, and find out what artists and DJ's play in your city. Now drag your npc friends to a show/dj-set that you really wanna see and bam. Npc friends will enjoy anyway because they're shitfaced, and you get a chance to see and maybe chat/connect with some of ypur favorite artists. I thought I was a superior quirky introvert intellegent gamer girl before I got dragged into edm by my brother. You're really missing out, even if you think you're not.

Oh and by the way, you'll meet a lot of different kinds of people once you work your way to more underground scenes or at parties that are actually dedicated to a specific genre. You're likely to meet people who are more like you and they'll introduce you to their friends, or take you to after parties. You might even get laid.

>you just sound so self-centered
Aren't we all though? Is it not human nature to be self-centered before all else?

As for talking about nerdy stuff like vidya/tech/anime, yes, I can hold hours of conversation on topics I am really into, but the problem comes when I am into a bigger circle of people (say 15 coworkers on after work drinking) and those topics become restrictive since not everyone is into vidya and not everyone wants to talk about the latest google pixel smartphone.

In that kind of setting I truly am boring, and find it hard to contribute to most of the conversations.

Thanks, this is exactly what I am trying to do and why I started the thread in the first place.

My existing groups of friends aren't much into clubbing or trying new stuff in general, so it kinda became boring going to the same exact cafe each weekend and seeing the exact same people and having the same conversations with little excitement or change.

That's why I've recently been trying to get along with my coworkers who are the "normies" mentioned in the OP. I want to experience some change in my life, and they seemed like a perfect group to guide me on that path.

I guess I just need to take it easier and go with the flow. My obssesive personality forces me to be in control of everything I do, but sometimes I need to just take the back seat and let someone else drive.

>purposely hang out with people who hold different interests than you
>WTF WHY DON'T THEY SHARE THE SAME PASSION AS I DO?!?!?!?!?1?

Sounds like a you problem bucko. I have no issues talking about my passions with my friends and vice versa. Why don't you try acquiring a new group of friends? Go to your nearest tech convention so you can geek out about the latest computer parts and automated robots. Join a hiking program so you can jerk off about being healthy among your fellow hikers.

Yes, because the only thing that's a guarantee every day is the sleep part. You're not always working, you're not always going to the gym and you're not always doing side-projects.

that was someone else
altho i agree that op comes across as narcissistic.