I don't understand dating

I don't understand dating.
When I was living with my parents and jobless, I kept reading posts that would say things like "if you wouldn't date yourself, why would someone else?" and took it on myself to self improve.
Now I'm out on my own, I have a career, I've bought new clothes, started going out with my coworkers... and I'm still just as unsuccessful as before.

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Well would you date yourself?

Haha those are just lies the wurms spew to keep unattractive men like you in the rat race, providing labor, paying taxes, consuming shit. If you were attractive you’d succeed regardless of financial situation. Sorry man

This.
You think Zuckerberg and Bill Gates had groupies before they settled for an ugly wife anyway?

Are you depressed?

It's bullshit, user
Normies also say that being in a relationship with someone also means that you have to come to terms with their flaws and that you help eachother overcoming said flaws if possible

Only women are allowed flaws, incel. Grow up

That's not BS. I think OP is probably perfectly capable of getting a gf but maybe he is depressed and thinks a gf will help when she won't.

I think so. I live a stable comfortable life. I'm educated and can hold a conversation on a lot of topics. I'm social enough to have an extended friend group. I plan for the future. I'm physically as active as I can be. I have a good paying job with flexible hours and a promising career outlook. I feel like I have a lot to offer.

In most regards I'm successful, it's just with dating that I continually fall short.

Just keep trying eventually you will have luck.

Your post is bullshit too though. From my own experience, when I had a gf despite having no friends, I was always happier and I felt motivation to self-improve for her, plus I didn't look like a loser when walking outside. So a gf definitely helped me feel better.

Don't give up your probably looking at others with false expectations. You have to be more proactive about it though
Search for them in your friend circles/ clubs etc

I didn't say that. Did she help in the long term though? Alcohol definitely helps people feel better too. I do think a gf can be supportive and caring but in the end you have to be the one to pull yourself out of the depression which a gf could help you do that but it is more likely you are just clinging to her. If not that is good news for you but it is not the norm and lots of relationships end badly because of depression.

Yeah, but I wouldn't attach a label like "depression" onto everything if someone is feeling lonely. It's natural for humans to want a connection with others and wanting to feel human warmth. Hugging her each time I saw her, was one of the best things ever. A year before meeting her, I was genuinely planning my suicide.

I agree I just mean that sometimes people can't help you and you stay attached out of fear of being alone again.

I'm not depressed, at least not in a clinical sense. Do I feel upset at my failings? Sure. But I don't have trouble getting up or just living life if that's what you mean. My life isn't a problem that needs solving, it just feels incomplete without someone to share it with.

>I am a woman and I live a stable comfortable life. I'm educated and can hold a conversation on a lot of topics. I'm social enough to have an extended friend group. I plan for the future. I'm physically as active as I can be. I have a good paying job with flexible hours and a promising career outlook. I feel like I have a lot to offer you as woman.
Does this lady seem sexy to you?
Just kidding with you man.

Seriously though, gauge your success in terms of interacting with women, not getting a girlfriend. How are you "unsuccessful"?
Are you varying your approach?
What are you actually doing and what have been the results?

The problem-- with all you guys really-- is that a girlfriend to someone like me and a girlfriend to someone like you are miles apart, and they'll always choose my version because there's no pressure. It's a trial, a test, a maybe-so. Do I date to win? Yes, but I don't need to make that the sole basis of why I interact with women or why I'm dating them.

There's just too much pressure from these guys who act like, "Everything is better when I have a GF!"
Girls don't wanna be responsible for that unless you're hot an rich in which case most people will happily be responsible for it.

But most of us aren't hot and rich. We have to have a strong character to draw in women, not an outward dependency on them.
Yeah, I fucking know "humans r SOSHUL creechur!!1" You honestly think you'd be the first one to present that argument, any one of you? But successful social settings predicate themselves on symbiosis, mutual benefit. Normies fucking lie when they say there's room for everyone cuz there's not, there's room for people who pull their own weight and that's about it. And if you don't pull your weight socially, AND you're a guy who's all "girlfren make it all better," the level of pressure the girl now has just to be with you-- just to date you-- it's kind of flooring at that juncture for them because in their eyes, you're just kinda cute.

The clingy, co-dependent girls are usually chubby, BPD or chronic sluts, so you can choose from that pool if you wanna. I'm guessing you haven't because you don't want to, but there's the list.

There are exceptions to every rule, gents, yes,
But I don't see you buying lottery tickets daily just to edge out the exception that very few people actually WIN the lottery.

Dating isn't like Disney movies where there's some magical soulmate girl out there for everyone

Women are all gunning for the most rich, successful, tall, handsome men they can possibly get. They all believe they deserve far better than their equivalent status male. If you are just sitting around like a dope hoping for a "cute gf", you are nothing compared to those high powered career guys or fitness models that have gigantic harems.

Is this a pasta

>if you wouldn't date yourself, why would someone else?
this question kills me inside desu, i dont think theres anything i could do to make me like myself

The best mentality you can have is knowing you don't need a gf to be a success, you already are one.

Nigga u gay

Why do you completely trust the opinions, perspective, and predictions of somebody you don't even value or like?
Stop listening to yourself. That guy has issues. Listen to someone else who you actually like instead.

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>you don't need a gf to be a success
100% truth.

>you already are one.
Wut?
Listen, if you're going to sell self delusion as a motivational technique, fine. But if you think you can convince people who need advice that they're already a success by simply telling them that, you've gotta stop getting high on your own product, man.

>"Wait I a minute, I thought that I had all these problems and issues I needed to overcome in order to become a success, but it turns out that I already are one! Yay! This calls for more crystal meth!