I know this is kind of off topic but I've been dating this guy for like 4 months now and he's just really terrible at sex. We barley fuck and when we do...it is bad. I tried talking to him about it and things just got awkward what do I do. He swears he's had so many girlfriends
Yo bad sex in a relationship
Try wearing something sexy to turn him on
I do.
We have toys.
It still is bad and after I tried talking to him about it. We haven't had sex at all.
Learn from online tutorials, be patient and take your time, having sex is like two partners dancing.
Like there is no passion on his end he doesn't ask for anything or tell me what he likes. I feel like it shouldn't be that hard lol
>bad sex
that sucks. but other than the sex, do you like him, why are you together and is there a future?
Walk through a general education session and see if he's a few cards short of a deck.
What exactly constitutes in your mind as "bad sex"?
Of course I see myself being in love with him and having a future together. He talks about getting married having kids. I just don't want this one thing to stop that from happening. But sex is kinda deal breaker for me in a relationship. Coz I want to have that connection with him. Is there something I can do?
Break up with him
Lol no I would like to try to work this
*through this
You have to be kinda firm, with him OP. I had to do the same with my GF, the sex was borning and we needed something new after like 2 years. We got kinky, and now we are both wild into it again. Most folks do have their kinks, he could be embarrassed by his, or just honestly not had a lot of good experiences. Even with other GFs that can still mean he has been on a diet of bad sex. He could also just be boring in bed, and if that is the case then you need to turn the conversation to "hey I want you to choke me with your cock and hold me against the wall, I need that". It is ok to want sex, you just have to strike a balance.
That has literally been the best advice yet. Thanks I will try this and see how it goes.
He's definitely down whatever. It can't get any worse right lol
A deck of cards huh? Care to play a round of golf?
Nawl they was talking bout Yugioh
I think golf can make a great dating game. It's easy to learn and there's room for conversation. But Yugioh? I'd kill too see a date go down like that.
He just doesn't love you, dear.
It's time to d-d-duel mi hombre
Lol my bf likes Pokémon better
He missin out on some blue eye white dragon
I can chunk an 18th hole. ;)
No prob Fag, remember that breaking up with him could be on the table as well if he can't communicate with you. It is important that you guys do that, with sex, or something stupid like who does the trash. I have been with my GF for 6 years. You have to talk and be willing to put yourself out there. If he won't then that doesn't bode well.
>Like there is no passion on his end he doesn't ask for anything or tell me what he likes.
K so this sounds to me like the problem is not bad sex, it is that he is not comfortable with vulnerability
> He swears he's had so many girlfriends
Here's something you gotta understand here- for guys, sex can be validating in a way that it isn't for women. For some guys it simply does not matter if the sex is good or bad- it's always good because they just re-affirmed their manhood by having sex with a hot girl. I'm sure he's had sex with a lot of women. He did that so that he can say that he's had many girlfriends.
Anyway, telling you what he wants sexually is a form of self-disclosure. It involves vulnerability, revealing something about yourself is taking an emotional risk because it opens you up to rejection or ridicule. Guys tend to be bad at that, because male-male friendships usually do not require lots of self-disclosure the way friendships between women do (they are more likely to be "shoulder-to-shoulder" instead of "face-to-face," that is, they revolve around shared activities).
Good relationships are built on self-disclosure, and good sex is just an extension of that.
I don't think it's that he had a panic attack coz he thought I was breaking up with him a few weeks ago.
It's not that he's not interested or isn't attracted to me.
He just is isn't good at having sex.
Like he tries I can tell and he thought he was really good pero no girl he was not
Raye is babe and barely legal .
>4 months
>sees a future with him
>sex is shit
ay if you really did try to talk to him about how it sucks and he got weird, its on him. the worst thing a woman can do is pretend to enjoy it when it sucks. gives the guy false confidence to keep doing the same stale shit, so good on you. but if he wont change, thats his loss and you shouldnt waste time....sexual chemistry often has a reflection on overall chemistry
Ty for your input. I haven't been with a lot of guys because I'm bi and was having self doubt at one point. Thinking okay maybe it's just me. But the way you just explained what guys are about and how they work is very insightful.
Very true. Pero like i just want to get passed this weird phase and hope things will just work out and start being better lol
I just want to vouch for the value of sexual chemistry. If it's missing, it might be tricky to get things going. (But it sounds from previous responses like it's there, so...) Good luck.
Ok what you need is about 4 liters of mayonnaise and a canoe paddle. If this doesn't work move to Edmonton.