>you have a huge deformity all over your torso, not visible with clothes on
>highly insecure about this but still wanna live a "normal" life
>meet potential partner, go on a few dates
when do you tell her/him about your fucked up torso?
You have a huge deformity all over your torso, not visible with clothes on
Is it pectus excavatum or whatever? If so just explain that it exists before you take your clothes off. If she dries up from something that basic then she didn't really want to fuck you anyways.
If it's a seriously bizarre looking injury or something you might want to ease her into it more gently. If there's any kind of scar she'll probably be more into it.
>potential partner
>dating
Don't date people that aren't already your partner. Easy. That way you have no worries concearning such minute matters
What deformity? Pectus carinatum or pectus excavatum? Scarring?
If they like you, they like you, it wouldn’t bother them if they really want you already.
Opening up to someone also can give them a deep sense of trust and that is truly invaluable and very underrated in a relationship.
how are you supposed to know a person then?
it is the bizarre kind, how do i exactly ease her into it?
true but i'm concerned about the timing, this shit can easily turn them off if we're just knowing each other
I wear a pouch on my side to drain my kidneys (from a childhood accident). I've had some success in dating and hook-ups (I'm gay) but I would say the majority of guys just pass. I've had two dating profiles. One I mentioned it and never got any hits and the other I didn't and got plenty of hits.
Both are still active. If someone contacts me through the second site (where I don't mention it), I usually tell them after 2-3 conversations and let the chips fall where they may.
hmm that does seem pretty early but reasonable nonetheless, i've gone to like 5 dates with this woman already lol I might have fucked this up
thanks for the input
Have the conversation now. "I really like you but I want to explain something to you..." Don't ask for an answer right away. Let her sleep on it.
through text? doesn't seem like a good idea desu...
Fuck no. Not text. WTF is the matter with you people that feel EVERY conversation needs to be dove via text? Take her out for an informal lunch, then go for a walk with nothing planned after except to drop her off somewhere and have the conversation while you walk.
Just tell her that it exists and that it's there. Don't prompt her to look at it or take your shirt off for her, let her be the one to decide (if) she wants to see it.
>normal modern communication is bad, you need to do an elaborate ritual to have even the most basic discussion
Sounds pussywhipped my guy
When you have this type of conversation, it's something personal and you should be able to gauge reactions as you speak, adjust tones, pause to allow thought. Something you will realize when you get out of high school.
she's aware i suffered a chronic illness but we both kinda played it off so idk how to approach it
Explain how the illness affects you and what effects it has on your body. She may have already researched it.
Get surgery asap b4 you lose out on life
lol that isn't an option, i'm surprised i'm still alive
Come on OP, just tell us what your torso looks like. Is it really that bad?
oh it's awful, i had blood clots in my liver veins, now i'm full of veins popping out, an ugly scar with a hernia right in the middle of my chest and a scarred belly button
I'm gonna need pics, user.
It actually sounds kind of badass, aside from the hernia.
i already posted one and it got really bad reviews :(
That was pretty brave of you.
Generally, people are dicks. All you can do is not give a fuck. Good luck finding a gf that also doesn't give a fuck.
You aren't your scars.
thanks man, it's fuckin hard
Some people have scars. It isn't a big deal. Just say...baby I want to tell you something and then pull up a picture of The Lion King uncle
haa actually a nice idea