Soon, my parents will allow me to start dating, and they have chosen a man for me to date, what questions are you required to ask in a date? Taking into account I have no experience with talking to men in general.
Soon, my parents will allow me to start dating, and they have chosen a man for me to date...
Is this a religious thing or something? Why aren't you choosing the date?
Just compliment him and make him feel like the shit. Answer his questions and ask whatever comes to mind
I am not in a position to choose, yes, my parents are religious people.
I ask this question because I am not sure what kind of questions to ask him.
Just ask questions and try to figure out if you like him. Try to find out if you share the same values. That is, if you know what your values are
Then ask him if he's going to try to keep you oppressed like your parents
Ask him whatever you actually think. I'd personally ask him (why did you pick me), that's if I were a female. It doesn't seem like you have much of a choice regardless so try being on his good side, ask him what he likes, what hobbies he does, you know like you'd ask a normal partner.
Most likely he will treat me the same way as my parents did, since my parents chose him for me. And I'm not sure, what makes you think that I am being oppressed? I have no other choice.
I am not good with talking to men, and I might have a hard time keeping the conversation going. What other things can I ask him?
If your parents and your future husband is making life decisions for you, you have no freedom and you're being oppressed. It's not that complicated. Get out of there and start a new life
You may think it is, but I have no other choice,nor money to live on my own, and if I had done that then everyone i knew would be against me for that decision, I might not have anyone that supports me in my life anymore.
>lack of "freedom" is oppression
I don't support arranged marriage, but your 'logic' is bullshit.
I may have worded myself poorly, but why don't you think taking away someone's freedom is the same as oppressing them?
Do you want a life where decisions are made for you? Do you think that's okay. If you like it that's fine, but if you don't you have to take control of your own life.
You can get a job, and you can find friends that support you and your choices. You can choose your own family and to surround yourself with people who trusts your judgement
An imbalance of power and/or responsibility is not the same as an abuse of said power. Are parents automatically "oppressive" for restricting how their kids play or where they go? Are governments automatically "oppressive" for enforcing traffic laws which in part dictate where, when, and how you travel to work?
You can argue about the usefulness of a given restriction (in this case, whether or not arranged marriages are a good idea for their purported goals), but that's not something inherent to restrictions in the abstract. Rejecting out of hand any restriction on personal 'freedom' (which itself is vague--since that's always limited by one's environment) is a recipe for chaos and selfishness, and in OP's case, it's likely to be counterproductive if she is in a society which greatly values family input in marriage.
If OP loses social support by melting down about 'agency', it could very well be the case that she has even less autonomy because of how drastically her available resources are cut.
Well, I have no other choice I said.
>parents dont let you date but they do let you browse Jow Forums
Why don't you have a choice? Where do you live?
How would you define oppression?
I see what you are saying, and like you point out there is a difference between traffic laws and making life decisions for your woman/daughter. You're probably right about OP losing autonomy unless she lives somewhere where women have rights and there is a system in place to support her.
I am allowed to date.
I use Jow Forums to write my thoughts.
Are you a dude?
I dont have a choice, I don't live in a place where women have support for that kind of issue.
>How would you define oppression?
An abuse of power for its own sake. To extend the traffic example, an abuse would be setting up a toll booth every kilometer on a highway.
>unless she lives somewhere where women have rights
It affects the men, too. Given how arranged marriages often are, she might already have a fair degree of freedom if I understand the situation correctly. She's being introduced to a guy, yes, but if she can decline marrying him, that's a lot more than you can expect in many places.
I S L A M
If yes: If your country isn't a warzone and has an airport get some money together and try to get a ticket to Europe or some crap.
>try to get a ticket to Europe
F U C K O F F
How unhappy do you think you’ll be living with someone who you aren’t in love with? Do you think it even matters what you feel? Or do they beat individuality out of people there?
you morons should stop trying to tell her to rebel or move out or whatever the fuck and just answer the goddamn question. She can't choose who she dates and that's an unbendable constraint. What's the best advice you've got given that condition?
I'd chip in but I'm a beta virgin who's never dated so fuck if I can help