What is something your parents did that, even as a child, you knew wasn't good parenting?
What is something your parents did that, even as a child, you knew wasn't good parenting?
They let a drunk Muddle Eastern businessman duct tape me to the wall for money.
They bought me at a market in Egypt.
They peed in my bed and yelled at me for wetting my bed
Hit me because I didn't know how to do my math homework in elementary school.
Drinking so much they peed on top of the toilet. Smoking meth and marijuana. Drinking beer while driving. Taking me to shoot bb guns at the dealers house while buying drugs
Checked, I had the best parents and they did nothing wrong.
divorced when I was a tot and used me as a bargaining chip for child support up until the very end.
saw me humping my lil sister and just pretended like it never happened
> you can’t do that
Why?
> because I said so.
> you have to do this
WHY?
> because I told you to
> second place is first last
my mother: refusing to leave her shitty husband (my father) and then second husbamd (step father) and making me grow up watching her get the shit beat out of her constantly
my father: raping me as a toddler
dunno which one's worse.
Like, humping motions, or full on piv?
That is so bizarre to me. How do you do that and not pause to think its weird?
Don't feel bad about that dude, literally every divorce is like that.
i would say probably the 2nd one but maybe that's just me. are you male or female user?
female. and yeah, she's been divorced for a long time now and hasn't been dating any abusive guys anymore so my father probably takes the cake for long term damage.
literally. i have uterine scarring and probably can't have kids because of what he did
Calling me air headed at 8 because I missed the nigger bus that passed by me my first day at a new school. I cried anyway and now regret it but he left my crackhead mom when I was four and got full custody and it took me 25 years to figure it out and stand up for myself
Many many instances since then but that was the first I remember thinking “this ain’t right”
Nah just humping butt naked
Parents using the "would you jump off a bridge if your friends did it?" bullshit excuse, and not seeing their own hypocrisy. Then when I'd bring up their past bullshit examples of them jumping off the bridge, they'd double down and say something like, "oh you're too young to understand". You cut off a piece of my dick cause, "we were worried about what the other kids would think" you fucking hypocrites!
sorry user, fuck that guy. i hope you took legal action against him.
aggressive father, calling me names, threatening me all the time
mother passive aggressively blaming me whenever my father got angry.
Call me a parasite and a disease.
Also making up random shit to modify my behavior, like "it's those damn computers why you can't fall asleep", I learned so damn fast not to trust authorities lol
Take me to daycare.
Smoked a fuck ton of weed in front of me and my brother since I can remember, and when I got into middle school my stepdad let me and him smoke with him too, as long as my mom wasn’t around which of course I thought was the coolest. I didn’t go a day without smoking weed till my mid 20s when I started dating my current girlfriend who was the first person who I was willing to cut back for. But, they weren’t violent, mean or drunks so hey I guess it could’ve been worse.
Well good for you, but we can't all be raised by Hitler.
did he touch ur peepee?
>Taking me to shoot bb guns at the dealers house while buying drugs
>not appreciating parent-child activities
you were the bad one here
Overprotective and didn't let me do things all the other kids did because she thought something bad might happen.
Is he still alive? Or have you been out of contact for long enough that nobody knows anymore?
Letting me be around my dad
How much did he pay? I see a profit potential in my kids
Homeschooled me out of fear of moral contamination by schools. As a result I have zero social skills
throwing coffee mugs at my face. pulling my ear to her mouth and yelling in it as hard as she could. spending most evenings and all hollidays at the neighbours house gossiping while i was left alone. using public humiliation as a punishment like dragging me into the neighbours backyard in my underwear and commanding me to stand there for an hour with my hands on my head
fuck single mothers and all the reasons they are single. fuck em
Your mom said nothing while this is happening?
Yes they got divorced!
Take meth, beat me and die.
Worthless whore.
-Beating my ass with steel shit
-Beating my ass for not knowing my times-tables at an age/grade level where it wasn't necessary
-Putting salt on me and my sisters back and making us lick it off
-Attributing everything bad me and my sisters did/to some devil-possession shit (and thus requiring us to go to church)
-Screaming/beating us for no reason
Your mom was a sicker person.
Indian philosophy time.
People consist of three qualities: Tamas (lethargy), Rajas (passion), and Satva (balance).
Your father was driven by passion but also by a kind of lethargy and blindness.
Your mother was less passionate but just as lethargic and blind.
It is far far better to be passionate than slothful.
When there's passion there at least a person is there but when there's no passion there there's no person there you're asleep, you're dead.
Acedis is a seriously deadly poison and you're mother was very sick.
Divorce.
Based quadubs
Dad would slap me up side the head of I didn't sit up straight at the dinner table. He would watch me like a hawk to make sure I was chewing my food properly, that I had a napkin in my lap, and that my elbows weren't on the table.
He understood mathematics on an innate level. He could do this complicated shit in his head without a calculator. Part of his job was figuring house plans to determine the cost of materials. I, on the other hand, have what is basically math dyslexia. He had no patience for the pace at which I struggled to understand math. He would look at me like I was retarded, and yell "why don't you understand this?!?"
Learning to drive was the same way. He tried to get me to learn how to drive a stick shift, but all the yelling, brow beating, and visible frustration made it impossible. He just gave up. Still to this day I don't know how to drive a manual.
He really hated when, as I got older, I wouldn't respond emotionally to his anger. Just a blank stare, and he fucking hated that. He still tries to get me to come to the house to eat, and it's not as bad as when I was a kid, but I still don't enjoy his company. I've never liked that man. When I last lived with my parents I had daily ideations of killing him.
Now I only think of killing myself.
Oh, there was the time he made me flush all my weed down the toilet. The next year he then comes up to my room and asks me to roll a joint for him.
When I was 18 he found out I was having sex with my GF, then he and Mom guilt tripped me for it, and made me go to church the following morning.
He was a good provider and we never wanted for nothing, but that man was and still is an insufferable asshole. He's a bully to everyone and can't help himself from lecturing me every time I see him. I hate that seeing my mom also means spending time with my dad. I just want to be left alone as a barely functioning adult. I can't do this Hank Hill horseshit.
As I get older, I understand why some parents are like this, particularly fathers.
Not justifying it, but understanding it.
Imagine like most men you're unhappy with your job, stressed out, constantly wondering if you've completely fucked up. Every single day you wake up miserable and hating the idea that you have to go to work, but you're willing to do it because it supports your family. You have a son. Your son is your legacy, you see so much of yourself in him. This also means you see the parts of yourself that you believe made you fuck up, the parts that you wish you could change, the parts that made you miss opportunities and held you up. So you try your absolute hardest to fix those things you know are trouble, you try your damnedest to try to guide your son and prevent him from making the mistakes you did.
Some men are monsters, but I have a feeling your dad loves you more than you could possibly know. A dad that doesn't care is an absentee father. Even if it was miserable, the time he spent trying to guide you he spent as a choice, and that choice was trying to make you into a better man than him.
So if you rape your daughter, you're passionate?
he got no legal repercussions because my mother didn't know for most of it and then when she did find out it was through finding the pictures he'd hidden of me on the family computer and then she was too afraid that she'd get charged with the CP charges too since it was technically her computer. so he never went to jail for that
out of contact since i was 10. am 22 now. he's been in and out of jail for other reasons (domestic violence mostly) so i've never had to see him since then
nope. she didn't know at first, because he was at home taking care of me while she was trying to get a nursing degree. she was in classes all day and he was alone with me. when she did find out like i said she was too afraid of him and of the legal repercussions, she didn't do anything.
sad but more common than you'd think. hard realization to swallow that a mother could react like that but that's the case in a lot of incest cases
This is why parenting should be like adopting. If you don't have the skills, you can't be a parent.
hard agree
Passionate and confused sure.
Rage is a passion lots of bad things are passions.
i understand sort of where he's coming from. and what he did was never violent, the damage to my body is just from the fact that i was literally too small for what he was doing. i understood what was happening and i was scared but he always was "gentle" about it if that makes sense
everyone in my family (nobody outside my immediate family knows about the abuse) agrees that he loved me very much, more than life. he treated me very well outside of the abuse and never hit me like he hit my mom.
one time in a support group someone said that if your father does this it's almost like they just got confused and loved you in a way they weren't supposed to. they still love you, just in the wrong way. so like they got confused i guess.
but that's just my experience. lots of incest survivors have more violent stories
Divorced early. beatings. yelling. the usual.
what i thought was weird was mom would take away my "door privileges" and "mattress privileges" so i could have no privacy or anywhere but the floor to sleep.
also both parents have told me separately that having kids was the biggest mistake of their lives, so thats cool.
You're wrong. My family has ran the same small business for four generations, working on five. Dad was the co-owner and president of the company before he retired a couple years ago. He's a man that gave 110% to everything, and was certainly a workaholic. Was a football player in high school, and a business major in college. He and my mom got married at 21and immediately started having kids. I'm the youngest of three children. I don't believe he has the doubts and hesitation that most people suffer, because he is absolutely sure of everything he does. I have absolutely none of those qualities, but at least I'm not the world's most insufferable overbearing asshole.