How do we solve the incel problem? How do we make men want to fuck women and start families instead of playing videogames and killing themselves?
How do we solve the incel problem...
By being worth the effort.
Unless you're lucky and get a decent girl or are like most guys and addicted to sex/porn, it's just not worth it.
I dont need sex and it's unlikely I'll get affection and loyalty from an undamaged girl.
In a sense retreating to games or other hobbies is cutting your losses, all the guys I know who went ahead and married some whore because they were told to and was pussy so bad are depressed now, some of them divorced with a look of death in their eyes.
I might not be truly happy but at least I'm comfortable and in control of my life. If I don't meet a girl worth the sacrifice I'll retire early and do whatever I want until I'm dead
I'm not happy about it, just being realistic since relationships have really gone to shit.
Men do want to fuck women still. The problem is that 90% of women are after 10% of the male population, and that's how it's always been. Many of those women won't get to be with an alpha and will settle once their biological clock catches up with them in their late 20s or 30s. Once they settle, they are usually the ones that withdraw sex after the first year or two. This is such a fucking stupid article.
>90% of women are after 10% of the male population, and that's how it's always been
Citation needed
At very least, women are very unrealistic in how they view men.
The real answer is that hardcore porn is a click away and it has destroyed the male sex drive.
Men who don't have positive experiences with women aren't going to want to try forever. It's not as simple as forcing men to become what women feel entitled for, but neither is the reverse. It does start with having positive and non-adversarial opinions about the opposite sex which is a difficult one these days it seems.
>want sex
>can play shitty dating games for months with constant negativity and cost
>or just jerk it for free whenever you feel the urge
The choice is obvious.
>How do we make men want to fuck women
I'm over here, they're welcome to come and see me anytime so why don't they?
I have yet to find an incel irl. This thing only exist on internet.
I’m not judging man I have my periods where I’m jerking all the time. But I know it’s bad for me.
I watch like 10 minutes of porn a week at most, still a khv tho
I’m working to save up to have a family now, but these girls don’t want to commit.
Have you seen how much work it is to take care of a baby? A lot. Sex is serious business and all people want to do is chase the beginning romance stage feelings over and over again without the need to actually reach the endgame of a family.
I’ll meet her, but I play for keeps not thrills. That old fashioned mindset scares a lot of them away cause girls just want to have fun.
That's because it's a pejorative that's thrown around so much it means whatever people want it to now. ffs, there is a Humans of New York post about a guy who went from incel to PUA and people in comments are saying he's still an incel because, despite sleeping with *dozens* of women, he still has the "incel mindset". It's funny how quick people are to shit on a dude for improving his odds with women instead of just staying a nice little boy that nobody wants to fuck .
Why not let evolution do it's thing with those knuckle draggers?
This is just natural selection. Who would want to have kids with someone like that anyway? Let the defunct ones rot.
The men who play video games because they can't get laid at all don't honestly think its preferable to sex. Or do you really think guys can't enjoy vidya and benis in bajoon at the same time?
I'm sure people didn't see many homos irl when sodomy was a crime.
There's more a lot more to enjoy in life than maintaining a relationship with a girl
Name three things.
Gays are rare to find cuz they only represent mentally ill(1 % of world population) people, whats your point?
Homophobes are practically gays too, and there's a lot more than 1% of the population of those.
Using the word homophobe unironically puts you in the lowest percentile of IQ. As if it isn't perfectly rational to be disgusted by diseased homos.
Not sure I buy the 1% stat but my point is that nobody is going to own up to a negative label. People who might identify as or with incels online are not going to irl.
>make foray into dating world
>holy fucking shit this is terrible
>"Work on yourself."
>come back
>how can something be so awful
>do other stuff instead
If I had a penny for every time an incel posted this graph i would have a shitload of pennies
>Homophobes are practically gays too
Are you a local clown here?
>literally statistics from a dating site
>must be them incels making stuff up
>work on yourself
>now you can be rejected by more attractive women
Realistically only 2 things need to happen:
Women need to start acting like women again and jobs need to start paying more.
Isnt an incel a person that is undateable, wouldn't you be able to spot him? So he obviously wouldn't be able to hide that, now would he? Cmon bro.
And?
Would you like an article from the Washington Post? They had something on declining sex in millennial back in March. That's a respectable source.
It's really all about personality and understanding how to be sociable. I could have easily been a massive incel/NEET//v/irgin tier nobody but around late middle school just got better at learning how to be better with social situations. Being in an extra curricular like band helped as well. Learned to just keep my mouth shut and observe from the failures of others for awhile. Still hit my own snags but by the time I was in college I was banging chicks under the Nintendo Power posters in my room using new fangled dating apps and my general down to earth personality. Overall I still value relationships versus hook ups but parents are most likely just raising their kids shitty and not adjusting properly to socializing them within the context of a social media heavy world
ouch
On the flip side, I don't really want kids. I have never really wanted to be a dad and logically it seems like an extremely foolish thing to do in this economy.
>kids take money
>world is in a weird shitty place
>education system in the US isn't great
>economy will probably get worse before it gets better
Why bring life into this world just for it to suffer and why bring life if i can barely support my own even were I to pair with a partner and commit to a child, there go my own interests and time for myself. So I'll just do the right thing and not have kids
Dude. Have you played Dark Souls? I dunno man.... shit is TASTEY!
It's interesting how you mentioned that shift around middle school for you
I had the complete opposite experience; I remember being a sociable, funny kid and once puberty hit - right around middle school - along with moving to a new school where I knew nobody, I just shut down. It really fucked me up and I sit here typing this as a 26 year old KHV. I fucking hate that term btw.
Its a mental health problem in a way. I have gone through periods of being a incel and the reason we don't approach women is resentment and fear. Also i feel like women we do try and talk to can sense that in us. Or the lack of confidence. Anytime we worked up the positivity and confidence to try again and it doesnt work out it just reinforces the mentality, when it does work out you're instantly although temporarily cured until your current relationship stops working out. How can you turn an incel, into a vocel without them getting laid? Honestly I kind of just faked it until i made it.
Exploring the world, reading books and getting fit. Not that many incels actually do that.
See I remember being that way till maybe third grade, then for no reason at all there were just shit kids in my class who decided to bully me. did my best to stand up but just got shat on for no reason. By 5th grade I had kind of shelled up but tried to stay true to what I liked in my home life, but in middle school since I went to a different school than most kids I knew in elementary I sort of used it as a weird reinvention point, not completely of course but it was enough time to at least kind of forge my own way that by the time I went to high school and maybe saw some familiar elementary school faces i was just a different person.
Also didn't help that my parents divorced when I was 2 and around 3rd grade was when my dad really drifted away from even supporting me, lots of shit just hit the fan but i think i just became more self aware then, took till my early 20s to really push away from my moms somewhat religiously opressive upbringing but it was bound to happen
Zero for three, but thanks for trying.
Im an incel turned chad and i didnt read or get fit. Im slightly over weight and dont wear it well. 5'9 and 182.
I lost virginity at 16 but didnt get laid again until 22 and now am 28 with 15 partners and this isnt to brag its just to say ive experienced both worlds.
Back in my day of 2009 we had to fucking talk to girls in person to sleep with them in college.
kids these days
What a pitiful existence you must live.
2009 was my freshman year in college. A friend of mine showed me this wild website called okcupid
Shit was nothing like it is now. I've got so many fucking silly okcupid stories from the days before it was a tinder clone app and was actually a site primarily
Ah I didn't get on OkCupid until 2012, but I know what you mean. I actually had fun experiences with it too.
Wait actually it was 2014. Still it was better even then. Now it is hot garbage
That would be so much better than apps. Why can't we go back to that?
>you have different priorities so you're worse
Maybe there's something for you to think about here.
By accepting all sorts of degeneracy as normal we have fucked up the moral fabric of society. I'm not saying we all need to hate the gays and thump the Bible. But, we need to acknowledge that people outside of the norms are not fucking normal. We have to stop preaching acceptance and progression, and replace that with respect. The nuclear family is shamed for having too much privilege these days and that's a major problem. It's a butterfly effect, and its fucked everything up. It all stems back to this.
Yeah, all date apps are tinder clones that cater too hard to women, and, to be fair, im sure plenty of women probably had way too many experiences with shit dudes on apps when compared to how many guys had experiences with shit women. I doubt it was an even thing, but its still so generic. I was single for a bit last summer for the first time in like 3 years and got on tinder and okc again and while I got some easy pussy both apps are kinda lame/boring
Okc was originally pretty neat and was more focused on profiles like a social media site but turning it into an app style affair just ruined it
Most women aren't worth the trouble and I say this while in a relationship of 2 years. She's okay, but sex is a chore, I rather sit down and vidya with the bois.
I want my time back.
Why is it literally impossible for incels not to lie? This graph in no way shows supports your 90/10 claim in any way. What you said is a lie you know it.
>everything was better in the good old days and society is crumbling because girls don't have sex with me
lmao nice lie bro
My penis is too small so I don't even bother
How about you explain why that graph supports it. All it shows is that a small subset of self-selected people on a dating site have difference of how they rate others. If what you said were not a lie we would see it in real life: we would see 90% of men being virgins and 10% having harems of 10 girls. Does that happen? No? Well then it's a lie.
Being an incel means being extremely stupid and jumping through mental gymnastics to believe things that are both ridiculous and contradicting each other.
We don’t have a population problem. It’s a good option if you like your finances to be safe. And video games are fun and life can be hard. So... why would we want them to stop being incels? I would understand it better if we educated these stereotypical tropes of incels away, but we don’t need people to fuck or make more babies.
Two different things here: the "incel" problem can be solved by education and better parenting. After all bad parenting and bad education are what results in being an incel.
As for the second thing... more difficult. Vidya these days is more fun than sex.
I don't think it's education. I think being an incel (let's just say unsuccessful with girls since incel is much more loaded and means different things to different people) comes mainly from having a certain kind of personality and being brought up in the last 20-30 years, due to the general erosion of human relationships and difficulty for some shy, low self esteem men to have paths to find a significant other
>due to the general erosion of human relationships
The what?
A garbage tier male with no self esteem and zero value would not have found a girl 50 or 100 years ago either. Society today lets these kinds of males exist, that's the crux of the problem.
Then you haven’t had sex, or had sex with someone compatible. Besides you don’t have to trade one for the other, which most people understand just fine.
>bad education are what results in being an incel.
bad education? Wtf does that even mean.
Lack of parental influence, lack of social groups, lack of educational options i.e shitty poor schools.
>being told you are a special snowflake and you deserve everything given to you
>no teaching of accountability, responsibility
Except that's not really it. Many of these unsuccessful men are just people who are crazy awkward around women but still have jobs and manage to go through life normally. Painting them all as fat acne ridden neckbeards that dropped out of high school is easy but untrue
Social media has had the unexpected development of making us feel less connected and more lonely than ever. Loneliness is an actual epidemic now, and the diseases of despair are skyrocketing.
Do you really think incels are more stupid than the average man? I'd love to see some proof of that.
I've actually had more sex than most people on this site. I am just saying what a lot of young people feel like. Vidya and social media have made it so that there is less of an urge to leave home. They are right there at your fingertips. Sex is fun but you'd actually have to go out, why bother.
>being told you are a special snowflake and you deserve everything given to you
except most incels have garbage self esteem and feel like no women could ever want them.
>diseases of despair are skyrocketing
Source?
Where do you meet these unsuccessful men? They hardly exist in real life outside of the internet. You're falling for the "all men are single and all women are taken" meme.
Call me a dyke but men are just not visually pleasing. That's why they lose on dating apps like tinder where all that matters is looks.
I have never seen a picture of a guy and thought he was attractive. I have chatted with men, not known what they looked like and thought they were attractive. It's all about personality for guys.
That’s why we have dating apps, we can find exactly what we want in someone and you can be inside together. If that’s what you want. You still have the option of going outside. Besides almost all video games are social now anyways.
I don’t think they are, but you are definitely dumb as they come if that’s what you’re taking away from this.
so when you say lack of educational options / shitty poor schools you're not implying they're uneducated?
Most things hardly exist in real life because we put on a mask. I am one of them and I have friends on similar situations, and statistics also seem to show that men in general have less sex and less partners than before.
>men and women in general have less sex and less partners than before.
Fixed that for you.
When I ask girls out, they always say no, and they call anyone who insists a creep and a rapist so I don't insist. However I am tired of being always told no. If a woman wants to fuck me, she'll come up to me and explicitly say so. If no woman wants to do that, no woman wants to fuck me, and you certainly want me to respect that don't you OP? Rape is bad.
>They hardly exist in real life outside of the internet.
They're just those normal, slightly quiet guys who don't talk about relationships much. I know at least as many guys like this as I know guys who have partners.
Men want sex. It's why the word involuntary celibate (incel) exists.
The word has been spouted by retards so much that it completely lost its meaning.
But since women have much more options because women's value in society is much higher, men have to fight for female attention and alot of the times it's just not worth it.
So I, like many, wish we had gfs but there's no point in putting in effort because we're just going to fight over scrap.
I didn’t say there is a correlation between incels and people who are uneducated. I was mostly referring educating people in general about the tropes around incels. I know this is way over your head so I'm out, peace.
Men are affected more than women, however, for obvious reason. But yes, it's both sexes. Does this mean that 28% of men and 18% of women aged 18-30 are just valueless and don't deserve to have sex? Or maybe there is a bigger underlying problem.
I like to theorize that men have sexualized women to the point that they realized we put them up on such a level that they no longer need men. As they don’t put in nearly the same effort when it comes to body, clothes, etc. and we pressured women into handling a job and a homelife, which is common these days. So why would they need us when we made them 100% independent. So of course they will pick a guy who is more on their own level, which are few.
So time to step up your game, women have for decades and we need to catch up.
I hate pressure. I'll enjoy a quiet life with my masturbation for sexual pleasure and my pup for companionship instead.
...are you serious?
I don't disagree and that's pretty much my theory as well. Before you needed 1 thing really to land a girl, a stable job because women weren't able to live by themselves. Now they can provide for themselves just fine (this is a good thing btw) and some of us who are shy and have a hard time doing the whole confident thing or guys who only have their jobs to bring to a relationship will find themselves completely alone.
Essentially everything is a competition and competition now is fierce because I'd say the average woman is more attractive than the average man. Add to that that the main way to meet partners nowadays is online and online greatly benefits women and people with good self esteem and it seems inescapable.
Until they have children.... then they want someone shy (less chance of cheating) with a stable job.
But I don't want to waste my money on another man's kids. I want to invest it on my own and my own exclusively.
It's incels themselves who hijacked that word. Now it refers to angry young sexless males who rage all day long on the internet about wanting to rape and murder women.
They are choosing not to have sex. Anyone can easily get sex if they want to these days.
sounds like women will have to lower their standards if they want a partner
>le women ride the cock carousel and settle for a beta provider once they hit the wall meme
>less chance of cheating
Citation needed.
How is a man choosing not to have sex when it's women who literally say no? Surely you want men to respect women's rejections and don't rape them when they don't consent?
You need a woman to consent to sex in order to be able to cheat.
You seem to not understand that women can find a solid good dude to start a family with relative ease. I’m not saying their life is on easy mode, but as a society we did pressure them to become all-inclusive people who could handle anything, be smart, and also be pretty doing it. They can easily find and make a stable family unit if they desire kids. It’s like we put their life on ultra-hard in hopes we could control an entire gender for our selfish and lazy ways. But turns out they nailed it and now we have created super-people, and most of them are women. And here we are, complaining crying man-children begging for attention.
>They can easily find and make a stable family unit if they desire kids. It’s like we put their life on ultra-hard in hopes we could control an entire gender for our selfish and lazy ways. But turns out they nailed it and now we have created super-people, and most of them are women. And here we are, complaining crying man-children begging for attention
this really sounds like it was typed out with one hand lmao
That’s not a problem for women, they don’t have to lower their standards anymore. But you (men in general) definitely need to raise yours.
Increase job opportunities, wages, and lower the cost of college.
I dont want kids simply because I can’t afford them.
Simple. Sexing a girl must become more joyful than playing a videogame. Right now there are same amount of endorphins are emitted, but playing a game is way more convenient. Girls must start to pay efforts to have sex e.g. hunting guys by themselves or lowering their standards.