If you have been with a woman for years, and you genuinely love them, but they have lost interest in sex, is it ok to cheat?
I've been with my wife 5 years. Despite repeated conversations about it, there's nothing I can do, she just doesn't really want sex anymore. Leaving would be harsh because we have a 2 year old together and I'm concerned about how that would impact them. It's sad that one issue can bring down a marriage, because everything else is great.
Have a mature discussion with her that your sexual needs aren't being met and if she doesn't want to meet them then you want the freedom to go elsewhere for it. But you still love her and so on and want it to be her instead. Then the ball's in her court.
>is it ok to cheat? No, never.
I explained it during the dating process. I could not have been more clear. She said sex is important to her too and likes to have it everyday.
And truly that's how it was at first. Then downhill .
Currently it's once a week and she just lays there waiting for me to be done.
Had a mature and logical discussion probably 20 times.
It's 100% in her court. I would do anything she wanted in the bedroom that would increase her desire.
Wait i just reread your post.
This seems smart I'm gonna try this.
Does she ever get horny at all? Try cutting her off for a while. Just rub one out to take the edge off, and don't even attempt to fuck her. First time she tries to initiate just nicely shut her down by saying you're tired, need to get to sleep, have a raging headache, etc. Keep this up for a bit and see what happens. As it stands right now she's metering out pussy to you hoping to keep you satiated with breadcrumbs. Making dick a scarcity may change her whole point of view on the matter. It's worth a try, better than cheating or attempting to turn her into a cuck queen.
>is it ok to cheat? No, never. Just have discussions about opening the relationship because needs are going unfilled for too long. If it's not possible, then dump.
She got it out of her system before you guys went out. Shes all fucked out
We tried to warn you
Thx. I would say that she actually gets horny maybe once a month. So that would be an actual session of sex where she is legitimately interested and likes what is happening
I would try this then. Women like a challenge. As it is now, she has complete control and she knows it. Cut her off for a spell. Seriously. Then when you finally give her some, rip them panties off and fuck her silly. I use this technique in a less extreme fashion on my wife. I get plenty of sex, but occasionally I do turn her down. Also I never give the impression that I'm the least bit thirsty. When we fuck though I absolutely have my way with her. It drives her nuts and she wants it regularly.
This is also what happening in my relationship. I've never had an issue with her not wanting to fuck but I do think it's because I almost never straight out ask for sex. She's also insecure because I have a lot of friends that are girls so she thinks if she fucks up I'll just move on. So she makes sure my needs are met. This could go two ways. More likely she will say no and "try to be more available" but eventually go right back to how she is now and you gotta talk to her again. Or she will let you get some side sex and she will start valuing you again because some other women is showing interest. Or she'll want some side dick too since youre getting another partner and the whole thing will blow up in your face.
It's only cheating if you haven't ditched her first.
>getting side pussy is okay >getting side dick is not okay Really makes me think
Have sex with other women. It's technically not even called cheating at the point you're at right now >Now that I've secured a family I simply lost interest in sex lmao fuck my husband's needs Don't have any remorse
Take her to a doctor and a therapist. Consider couple counselling. Help her more with the baby. Try everything before you cheat on you wife.
it clearly hasn't made you think about anything logically, you dumb cunt. She's the one who pretends to have lost interest in sex, why would she need side dick for? Fucking literal retard, I can't imagine how you manage to even breathe
What if she's lost interest in him, not sex?
How is she? Is she depressed? Is she working full time and taking care of the kid? When was the last time you went on a date together outside of the house?
Nothing dries up a woman like being a mom. But you need to sit her down and have a mature conversation that your needs aren't being met, like other anons said.
Pick up the book Mating in Captivity by Esther Perel while you are at it. Marriage needs work user. >is it ok to cheat? Never user
Post face op
I would suggest you also got some aphrodisiac food into your diet :D.
>If you have been with a woman for years, and you genuinely love them, but they have lost interest in sex, is it ok to cheat?
And before you ask:
>but what if she’ll never find out? No. >but what if I’m really really horny No. >but what if there’s this super hot chick and I just wanna get my dick wet it doesn’t mean anything No.
If you need some strange, talk about an open relationship. Discuss your needs and see if you can’t fix the dead bedroom first. If she won’t have sex with you, discuss opening up the relationship.
Unironically this lol she's settled with the beta after fucking every Chad in town. Tell her about your sexual frustration and if she still says no then fuck her.
My parents hated each other but stayed ‘for the kids’ and honestly i don’t know what love is supposed to look like or how to treat your husband/wife well. If that is an example you want to set for your kid then do so
lol this is the thanks she gets for giving you a child
never get married, ladies
>she had a child with him so now she has the right to make him miserable for the rest of his life.
My parents divorced when I was in high school. They loved each other but weren’t in love with each other.
They’re happier now. They’re still friends and help each other out. They made sure my brother and I got equal time on holidays and were super considerate of each other.
If you’re unhappy together, divorce and be happy separated. Best to divorce while you’re still friends— my parents’ divorce went super smoothly. It will be better on the kids in the long run.
>she doesn't put out 20 times a week so that gives him the right to break the wedding vows he agreed to
You’re both being ridiculous.
If she’s not willing to be intimate with him, that’s a problem and it means an important physical and emotional need isn’t being met.
Just because that need isn’t being met doesn’t give him the right to cheat on her— to break his marriage vows, to break her trust in him, to put her health at risk.
He needs to divorce or seek an open relationship.
OP, she is not attracted to you. Work on yourself. You think she doesn't want to fuck other guys? Lol no. You need to be a better man.
She is fucking him just not enough and not enjoying it as much as OP would like. Stupid fag should have never gotten married in the first place and ESPECIALLY not had a kid anyone with a brain could have told you sex would fall off significantly with a fucking 2 year old go deal with
Sorry, it wasn’t in the OP. Didn’t realize she was still sexually active with him. Didn’t realize there was a 2 year old in the picture.
OP may also need to consider finding more time and money for a baby sitter and having “date nights” with his wife.
You guys are not having sex, but the rest is working, and you have a kid. Deep inside you know that she'd be OK with you cheating, as long as no one, including her, finds out. Deep inside you know she may be even hoping you get a hooker or an affair to fulfil your sexual needs and stop bothering with this thing, sex, that she is no longer into. And no, you're not being cheated. She is just not into sex anymore and that is not going to change user, no matter what you do. Even if you go for another child you'll have sex only until pregnancy and then back to this. This things don't get corrected. You are allowed to take care of this issue outsourcing sex, as long as you are a man, keep it to yourself and don't destroy your marriage in the process. It's ironic, but that's the way it is, and it has been, for millennia.
Just buy a fleshlight, you ding dong.
Lel. Could you be any more of a bitter virgin incel?
Talk to her again. Dating process is at least 5 years in the past dude. If she doesnt want to have sex figure out why. And you only will do so if you talk to her.
So she's lying to him, on top of not having sex with him like a normal partner does? OP, you're entitled to have sex with other women and lie to her about it. Simple.
shes cheating on you dumbass
Try to seduce her. Make her a bubble bath, give her a massage, make her cum with your tongue without actually having sex, stuff like that. Make it more fun for her instead of an obligation.
Fuck all this noise in here about “communicate to her about how your needs aren’t being met” you can’t negotiate sexual desire with a woman. You could tell her “listen I need sex and blah blah” she’ll probably even comply. It won’t be fucking good, it’s pity sex. An exchange. Not genuine romantic desire. You have to covertly tell her that you’re attractive. This means losing that extra 20 pounds. This means being fun an exciting. And most of all subconsciously implying that other women find you attractive. Now I don’t mean telling you’re wife that “I have this coworker that’s been flirting with me at work” If other women find you attractive it will manifest in your personality and subconscious behavior. Women que on this. And it will trigger your wife to be sexual with you again. It’s called competition anxiety. As far as I can tell you have a couple options >communicate to her that you want sex Not actually going to work >improve yourself and become more attractive to other women Will work >cheat Disrupt your entire family unit >divorce Also disrupt your family unit, but would probably pay off
We both work, but she only works 2 days a week and I work 5. We also have a regular daycare so she can drop the kid off any time she wants.
As far as the conversation itself I've delivered it literally 20 times. Nothing changes.
As far as my appearances i look exactly like the day we met. 6ft and in good shape.
I appreciate a lot of the advice, I'm gonna tell her I need an open relationship. After that i think we have to head for game over if she says no or nothing changes. I can't keep going home to a woman who has zero physical interest.
I would eat her pussy for 2 hours if it would solve this problem.
And to the person who asked, we do 50/50 parenting as far as workload.
You're the same guy posting this in all the other related threads, aren't you?