this morning I woke up for work and a shadow motherfucker was staring down at me
I tried to stick one arm out and choke it but it was unphased and just got closer to me and pushed on my chest
apparently you cant choke shadow motherfuckers
anyone else deal with these cocksuckers?
Sleep paralysis you dumb fuck.
Glowniggers got you now.
...
you gotta show them your dick
Go to your doctor and ask him to put you on lithium. If that doesn’t work you should definitely blow your brains out with a shotgun you fucking retard.
Very common. Has been happening since humans lived in caves and huts.
Did it have glowing eyes? If so, what color?
Your sleep paralysis dude looks like the Aussie shitposter caricature
show no fear and they shall disappear
Look into servitors/tulpas
Create an automatic defense drone that attacks shadow motherfuckers
Also, create another one that attacks anyone who curses you
The other option is mind bullets
mystery solved
/thread
Americans being mentally ill because of racemixing doesn't require a thread.
all the time, they don't like it when you whip your
dick out and stroke yourself hard while looking
directly at them.
Dude no one is modding this shit. Just say niggers.
Sleep apnea? Get one of those mini iron lung thingys.
this
Look up sleep paralysis OP
They are demons. Only way to deal with them is through the name of Jesus Christ.
KEK
This ultimately gives the shadow creatures what they want. That want you to get into the occult, and it totally works. It's how it all started for me. Just repent if you haven't already, and have no fear of these things. They torment the weak.
I once woke up in the middle of the night and started physically assaulting a lamppost. I turned my light on to see my roommate had snuck in and was on the other side of the room going to bed. I guess ppl being sneaky wakes you up more than loud ruckus.
How now? I strangled one to DEATH one dark night. I never saw one again, and the "name of jeebus" had nothing to do with it.
You americans are fucking wacky
>mind bullets
The biggest point I can stress is to ignore anything a Christcuck says. They will lead you down a path of delusion from which few return.
I saw one of them boys once. I baasically summoned him myself because i was thinking about it a lo t before i went to bed. basically i woke up couldnt move and it was next to me with a hat on . i was like fuck u im tired and went back to sleep and then it was gone.
another time i woke up and was screaming my lungs out downstairs even though i was in bed, about something, then i woke up fully and it didnt happen
lololol
also it could be a golem attack
This has happened to me when I get "explosive nightmares" i.e. when something jumps out at me in a nightmare and makes a really loud screaming sound or nuclear war starts in the dream and I wake up with sleep paralysis.
One time I dreamed that a nuke went off and I was consumed by the fireball and when I woke up I vividly saw a hallucination of someone stabbing me while I was paralyzed because I interpreted the burning sensation and phantom pain as me being attacked in my sleep by an intruder with a knife.
Had a similar nightmare where something jumped out at me in a dark room in the dream and I woke up to seeing a bloodshot-eyed man strangling me.
I'm certain it's my brain making snap judgements of explosive jumpscare -> waking up paralyzed and still hallucinating because I haven't left the dream fully -> "I must be getting murdered" out of survival instinct
'yellow' (amber)
Jow Forums will now suffer server issues
Sith and Jedi don't believe in spooks.
>They are demons. Only way to deal with them is through the name of Jesus Christ.
Then use his fucking name RABBI YESHUA!
I became a christian when i had a shadow fuck. My mon told me of a story about her mom, she had sleep paralysis one time and she just got this idea in her head to say "in jesus' name go away" just like that. Boom. Went away, never came back. I had it twice, only once did i see something. The second time i saw it, got the same idea "in jesus name go away" boom. Gone. No more. It's scared and now attacks my parents. Almost possesses them.
Anyway one day i was watching a netflix movie called the nightmare or something like that. I was eating and this girl comes on and talks about how she would have sleep paralysis constantly. Until one day she said the exact words "in jesus name go away" my fork clanked against my plate in slow motion almost. I dont know her. Shes some random bitch who said the same words me and my grandmother said. I threw my hands up and spoke "okay i get it" to God. Christian now.
Anyone ever had a nightmare where something weird and forboding is trying to harm you, you keep wakign up in order to get away from it, but everytime you go to sleep again the dream starts but it takes a while for you to realise you are dreaming, then the weird formless thing starts attacking you again...
They are still there, even if you think they aren't. They watch you and they influence you.
Very much this, you beaner. Despite what your beaner grandma told you, ghosts aren't real.
>Wake up early
>crawl put of bed
>head to work woth a shit breakfast
>arrive late and get blasted
>fuck up shit at work
>wake up because that was a nightmare about waking up and going to work
Fucking kms
Literally just youtube
"shadow people" "jesus"
There is about 234982374234 testimony videos of shadow people and conversion to Christianity of people who used Jesus to fix their issue.
>They are still there, even if you think they aren't. They watch you and they influence you.
AHHHHHHHHHHHHH!
RABBI YESHUA TAKE THEM AWAY!
All I know is, if they fuck with me, I will literally will myself to haunt THEM if I ever die. My spite is on levels of a curse.
I've dealt with them many times
The worst was
>woke up to one laying on my desk
>yelled at it to leave
>felt its anger
>immediately overcome with immense fear of my life
>never been so scared before or after
>seething
Based schizo poster
>we should take the word of brownskins that lived 800-1200 years after his death and never saw his body
Hurr durr
>have a big pain in the ass thing to do at work tomorrow that is going to take all fucking day
>go to sleep day before
>wake up, go to work, do thing, it sucks
>wake up
I fucking hate dreaming about work.
yah but that doesn't explain why I saw the exact same thing as OP despite never hearing about "shadow people" until now
Where do you think it came from
I saw the same exact figure walking down my hallway and into the bathroom a few years ago, except he had the type of coat Eric and Dylan wore.
And when you read the research on these phenomena, you find just as many cases in which other religious invocations do the trick or in which non-religious folk will the invaders away. There's nothing special about the fictional kike Yeshua, he just works as a focus for otherwise terrified idiots. It's like retards who claim that exorcisms by priests prove that Christianity isn't fiction, only to completely ignore that every religion has rituals for expelling spirits.
You are projecting the worst possible scenario onto the shadow. Which of these mentally ill patients is the most evil to you? Your answer reveals what values you find disgusting and repress.
go to /x/ you stupid nigger
>dream that I get up and get ready for work
>car wont start
>cant get a cab
>phone wont work or I cant dial the numbers got some reason so I cant call work and tell them what's going on
>wake up after bolting straight up and sweating
I dont even hate my job, I dont know why I have dreams like this.
Rabbi Josh
>tfw grew up in a haunted home
>activity levels were crazy high
>grandpa had a curse that spread
>daily poltergeist interactions
>not sighting
>interactions
>traumatized for life
>laugh at every soft faggot who gets spooked by a mere shadow
stfu baby
mystery solved, gang!
>think
>get shot
Thats a straya cunt. But honestly expieriencing sleep paralysis sucks, my personal SP was without visual demons, only felt an evil presence around me while I was awake and couldnt move, tried to raise my arms, but couldnt.Only later after looking into this I Started saying simply "Jesus Christ" in my head over and over again until I could move again. Spoopy shit
Seriously
yeah scary as shit when you encounter them but now they dont fuck with me anymore for some reason. I advise you to hang a nazi flag that will deter these kike agents.
dude is a shill. 1 post id...
We have a serious /x/'s autism infection in this board
Wasn't SP. I picked up the heaviest thing I could find and went into the bathroom after it. Nothing in there though.
what the hell are you even talking about. without calling people delusional or crazy, explain how I saw the exact same thing as OP and many others despite never even knowing about this phenom until now.
Holy fucking shit! I literally encountered this fuckin thing last night...
Why do they wear the hat
#2
3
2 and 8
2) Epileptic
Repression
When we talk about personality disorders associated with brain disease, damage and dysfunction (as occurs in some cases of epilepsy), some of the diagnostic features can be impulsiveness, irritability, the outbursts of anger and aggression. If this stout gentleman with a round head caused revulsion and fear in you, it is likely that early in your childhood you repressed some of such feelings and behaviors to your subconscious.
Denial
It is most likely that you are a kind and peaceful person. Being meek and friendly, you give the impression of a responsible and self-controlled person. You are stable in your feelings and easily bond with people, ideas and objects.
#3
Because it's very common and is down to the same neurological reason. You are both human beings, with the same workings.
#3 He's got a creepy look in his eyes.
Same.
Still not a christian though.
No actually, you won't find any Islamic, Jewish or any other religion testismony on youtube in regards to shadow people. I tried looking.
In fact, even "alien abductions" are the same thing. Theres several cases where people who claim they were abducted or regularly get abducted by "aliens" were able to stop their "abduction" by invoking the name of Jesus. The only thing thats been known to work to stop those types of experiences.
5 because shes bog eyed
You said the same words? If so you should delve a little deeper into it
I just don’t understand the hatred for me and my fellow shadow mother fuckers. Anybody ever stop to think that maybe we are there to help? People freak out way to easy.
Anything that invokes negative emotion/energy is not of God, but the Devil.
Spooky
That reads like a fucking horoscope...
>you won't find any...on youtube
Amazing standard of evidence, as to be expected from a Christcuck
Shadow people are indeed demonic in origin. They can’t actually hurt you, but they can manipulate your mind, much like greys, who do seemingly impossible things like walk through walls or pull people through ceilings up into a ship. These things aren’t possible, and none of these entities appear to manifest physically. The mention of Jesus does indeed send them scurrying, which is all the proof we need to understand where they come from.
This.
When this shit happens to me I get pissed and say “bring it motherfucker” and it soon ends. You have to be confident and remember that your spirit of God is way more powerful than these fucks. They take advantage of weak spirit fucks while we’re in human form, but you always gotta remember you’re a God and you will be fine.
It pretty much is.
What the hell did you do to your Rubik's Cube?!
Reminder, the Bible says clearly God did not give us a spirit of "Fear". That spirit comes from the devil, it grabs you at your low point. Shadow people and such are meant to drive you to that low point.
>moving the goalpost
I get my information from the bible, not youtube. Other peoples testimonys are exactly that, testimony, nothing else.
in this thread there seems to be a suspiciously high vested interest to convince us that it's just in our heads
you're talking about the jew god, right? are you sure he's the good guy?
>shadow something wants to kill me
>okay
Or the truth is that it's in your head, and we are telling you it.
Yep, just sort of thought it, while in that realm between sleep and awake.
First time in years. Used to experience this shit and more, nightly.
Yahweh? Yes, he is the creator of everything. We have no word but his word. He (The Word) manifested as Jesus. What your heart knows as Jesus (The Word of God) is all thats needed because he is the paradigm of love. He did not give us a spirit of fear, that comes from the devil.
do you try to convince Wayne not to run for president? nope. wonder why
Interesting. How often has God and or religion invoked fear in people? The devil has also given people peace.
I am a shadow mother fucker, and we usually are there to help.
I have realized I was in an astral plane without trying once... Wasnt really fun. Only astral travel when it's intentional and we'll meaning
I usually just roll around, thrash around, fall on the floor then walk the dinosaur
You sound like you have legit mental issues. Actual paranoid schizophrenia.
>a shadow motherfucker
we call them niggers
I saw them all the time as a child. They were always outside our bedroom door.
That wasn't a shadowman OP. That was a nigger robbing you
