If you've posted conspiracy theories involving Jeffery Epstein, you are committing an act that the FBI has deemed a form of Domestic Terrorism. Your IP and location are being logged. Do not attempt to flee. Your status has been designated RED FLAG, you must surrender your weapons to law enforcement immediately or face the consequences.
Additionally, you have been diagnosed with the following,
As per the COMMON SENSE ACT, your rights under the second amendment have been rescinded. This may not be appealed. Reminder that it is a Class A Felony to possess a firearm if you've been deemed mentally unwell, and a Class C Felony to allow a person deemed mentally unwell to have access to a firearm.
>Y-yes your honor, these posts came from an image board that knew we lurked there, and we posted inflammatory content to illicit them, and they routinely bragged about making fictional statements to taunt us Yeah really not worried
Dang, so all of that should qualify me for a med card. Thanks, FBI Psychologist bro. I will give this info to my weed doc.
Jace Rogers
ATTENTION TO ANYONE AND ALL INTELLIGENCE AGENCIES: EVERY POST EVER MADE BY THIS IP AND ANY OTHER ASSOCIATED WITH IT HAVE BEEN DONE FOR NO PURPOSE OTHER THAN SATIRE. I HEREBY ABSOLVE MYSELF OF ANY AND ALL INTENT TO COMMIT ACTS OF VIOLENCE OR TERROR AGAINST ANY PARTY BE THEY FICTIONAL OR EXISTING. FURTHERMORE, ANY POST MADE IN THE FUTURE BY THIS IP OR ANY ASSOCIATED IP WILL HAVE BEEN DONE FOR THE SOLE PURPOSE OF RESEARCH AND/OR SATIRICAL PURPOSE. SHOULD HOSTILE INTENT BE PERCEIVED BY ANY PARTY, IT IS THE SOLE MISINTERPRETATION OF SAID PARTY AND THEY IN TURN MUST PROVE BEYOND ALL DOUBT THAT ANY POST MADE BY THIS IP OR ANY ASSOCIATED WITH IT WAS MADE WITH CLEAR HOSTILE INTENT. IT HAS BEEN CLEARLY STATED THAT ANY AND ALL FUTURE POSTS BY THIS IP ABSOLVE ANY ASSOCIATED PARTY FROM ANY WRONGDOING OR LIABILITY AS IT HAS BEEN PROVEN BEYOND ALL DOUBT THAT THE USE OF THIS, BE IT DEVICE, IP, OR INDIVIDUAL SERVES ONLY AS A VECTOR OF SATIRE AND RESEARCH. ALL OF THE AFOREMENTIONED IN THIS BODY OF TEXT ARE TRUE FACTS AND LEGALLY BINDING. IT IS THE DUTY OF ALL PARTIES INVOLVED TO CONTACT THE IP HOLDER OR ASSOCIATED HOLDER THROUGH THE PROPER LEGAL CHANNELS TO REQUEST INFORMATION. IT WILL NOT BE PROVIDED BY ANY OTHER MEANS. UNIQUE POST ID IS ALSO NOTED AS BEING ASSOCIATED WITH THE AFOREMENTIONED PARTIES AND THE SAME APPLIES TO THEM WHEN A. THE INDIVIDUAL IS MENTIONED B. THE IP HOLDER IS MENTIONED C. THE DEVICE IS MENTIONED. ANY PURSUIT OF LEGAL ACTION OR INQUIRY AGAINST PARTIES A, B, OR C IMPLY COMPLETE AND TOTAL ACKNOWLEDGEMENT OF THE ABOVE TEXT
Joshua Gonzalez
FBI can suck my literal fat one.
Adam Robinson
Does the bitch peel the face? Will I get to be the next to watch her dance around while wearing my face?
Come and get it, FBI. I'm tall enough for this ride.
Jace Wood
All Alphabet agencies are gay. They suck cock. They take it up the shitpipe. They admire themselves in women's clothes. I want the FBI to fite me irl, but they won't because they'e too busy making daisy chains.
Julian Cox
haha fuck off glow nigger.
Luis Mitchell
>Oppositional defiant disorder
I always have a laugh at this particular made up excuse created to justify just about any level of harassment or incarceration.
Basically you have ODD if you refuse to do what you're told. That's what it sums up to. Whoever created this bullshit should be drawn and quartered, kept alive and then thrown into a volcano.
Hudson Walker
>you are committing an act that the FBI has deemed a form of Domestic Terrorism. Wouldn't be the first time
