What would the best way to protect my house from home invasion tonight?

What would the best way to protect my house from home invasion tonight?

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spend the entire previous year being bad

It a little late for that.

razor blades in the mince pie or cookies

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Maybe you'll get a substitute instead

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There's still time to cram it all in

Quickly. Throw eggs at your neighbor's house, OP.

He will still come he will just leave coal.

*prostitute

Fire in the fireplace.

Just don't go to bed. Get your sips on and stay by the door, I guarantee you he'll never show up.

What should I be armed with if he shows up.

Your cock

PENIS

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Where can I get one?

Ask around on grindr

You need an official Red Ryder,carbine action, two-hundred shot range modelair rifle!It's the best thing for home defense

Source?

Aim for the eyes

>throwing your gains at someone else's house
Never gonna make it

I legit panicked at my grandparents house on Christmas eve when i was 7 and a fire was in the fireplace. I thought Santa wouldn't be able to get down the chimney with a fire burning.

Move to London.

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>Filename
>Watermark

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