If you suddenly were teleported into the past and became his chief military adviser, what would you advise?

If you suddenly were teleported into the past and became his chief military adviser, what would you advise?

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Send panzers to Finland

Tell Hirohito to fuck off and leave the U.S. alone. Steamroll the Brits then fuck Stalin in the ass.

Invest in skrub stocks

Don't attack Western Europe. Nobody in the West gives a shit about Russia or any of those countries in between.

>entrance of USA into the European theatre
>decisive

Don’t invade Russia.
Spend 20 years consolidating your gains in western and Central Europe before you do anything else.
Somewhere in there you’ll get a Brit Prime Minister who’ll be willing to make a reasonable deal. Take it.
Same with the US. Wait out Churchill and Roosevelt.
Build your own military and economic power at home. Then think of more expansion.

Military coup

Go full retard hell for leather pushing east. Sack Moscow, destroy Sevastopol, kill the gommies, and then call it a day.

none of my advice would matter because he wouldn't listen to me

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Purge all gommies after winter.

>Nobody in the West gives a shit about Russia or any of those countries in between.
>any of those countries in between.

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It was decisive in the fact that it prevented the USSR from reaching all the way to poortugal.

I would instruct him to develop and utilize a new "wonder weapon", a thermonuclear warhead, and proceed to give him the plans and physics behind development of such a weapon.

War status = won.

Lay off on the meth.

No, as Hitler thought aomic science was "jewish science."

Well, the inventor was a Jew, cohencidentally.

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>implying
Hitler got it into his head that he was a military genius and ignored the advice of all his generals and advisers

I'd tell him to adopt the STG-44 before you start the war.

Is that why towards the end of the war the Nazis were scrambling to get an atomic bomb together?
The answer is: your dubious claims are dubious.

Do more cocaine you anti-Semite fuckhead

Why didn't they try to develop them much sooner? They probably tried to rush for one purely out of desperation.

Their Wunderwaffen could've saved them but they were so sure of their victory that they didn't think they would ever need them.

Cocaine is a spic drug. Do adderall.

I'd strongly advise him to not invade Russia or declare war on the US.
Work harder on forming an alliance with the UK.
DO NOT ally with Italy or Japan.
First and foremost, procure oil fields as fast as possible.
Begin development on the Me 262 immediately AND ADD AIR BRAKES TO THEM.
Quit wasting research and development time, as well as engines, all on shitty bomber/dive bombers.
Focus on a strong central defense of your borders.

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>Work harder on forming an alliance with the UK.

top fucking kek

NO.

They'd be a far more competent ally than the two fucking stooges.

Winston Churchill was a Rothschilde puppet and the UK is a ZOG state since forever

About as much of a chance of an alliance with the UK as there was with the USSR

>Why didn't they try to develop them much sooner?
Because that's not how research and development works.

>They'd be a far more competent ally than the two fucking stooges.

It's not like Hitler wouldn't have wanted such an alliance, but rather the Perfidious Albion wouldn't. Not in a million, billion years.

Anyone saying that it was remotely possible for an axis alliance with US/UK/USSR is a fucking retard.

Italy may have been a mistake but Japan as an ally made perfect sense.

This

S-sir how about we adopt winter uniforms first ?
>Don’t invade Russia.
More like Invade Russian and capture Moscow, wait for the party to assassinate/execute Stalin for failing CCCP and go for armistice with condition that all Soviet forces relocate to other side of Ural Mountains

Don't even begin to think about bombing Britain
Don't declare war on the United States
Don't invade Russia without oil
Herman Goering is a fucking retard, his advice about muh twin-engined dive bomber is pants on head retarded
Absolutely fund jet development
Bolt action rifles are great but semi-auto rifles are better
Produce the assault rifle at the start
Stop taking amphetamines, chucklefuck
Tell Duce that he's actually retarded and shouldn't do anything without asking your permission first

Be her best reasonable friend..Why? Don't you ever think Hitler-chan hated Jews without a reason? Hitler-chan just a lonely NEET without a true friend. She's tsundere with his generals because she's shy toward much older and more experienced heer's senpai (It's not like I-I wanted to attack Russia first ba-BAKA!). All her loneliness have caused Hitler-chan embarrassment and making her blamed the evil Jews as a way to funnel out her weakness. Plus she got bullied by dirty Jews from her high-school until she's forced to resign from her dream art collage. Hitler-chan is a victim.

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>Leave poland alone, for like another year
>don’t back up Japan if they attack the US
>don’t attack Russia till you and Japan can hit it from both sides

Its not even about the /x/ nonsense, when was the last time one empire supported the rise of another ? Look at France for example, they came close but Britain did everything possible to fuck them in the ass permanently

To actually commit to the holohoux

you have to go back to faceberg

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Alliance with Japan under condition that they Attack Vladivostok
Deport the Chosen people to where ever the fuck or point them to middle east, give them basic arms and tell them to go reclaim their holy land

Is that why Britain and France declared war on Germany after the latter invaded Poland?

Leave Russia alone, asshole. It didn't work the first time either. Wait until you have those sweet ass V-2's and nukes and just level Moscow with Stalin in it.

The Japanese alliance is still the best choice. If you don't have yourself spread obnoxiously thin on multiple fronts then the US is stuck on the other side of the Atlantic and can't do shit. If you keep the treaty with Russia then they won't risk having all of their ports by two naval powers.

I'd tell him to take Eva, buy a nice house out in the German countryside, have like six kids, write books, and enjoy life.

I'd then tell him that in my timeline Germany and her people are reduced to cinders... Raped, brutalized, and utterly destroyed, made to emasculate themselves post-war for decades to come.
If he is to wage war then he will inevitably lose.
Win politically and be happy with that.
You've saved your people from the depression for Christ's sake, and you could have taken them so much further...
No matter how successful you are at any military campaign, the bombers will just keep coming no matter what you do.
Shoot down ten and one hundred more will take their place, and thousands of lives will perish in the lakes of hell.

Just let it go.

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It's like nobody ITT has even read Mein Kampf or understands what was going on in the world at that time.

>entire campaign is "hey let's reunite the German people"
>this goes really well, major territorial gains
>still separate from old Prussian lands
>Poland has the Danzig corridor, which it wants so it has access to Baltic Sea, plus it's fairly modern and productive
>Germany wants it so that they can unify their territory and the people in Germany
>Poles get bootyblasted that Germany wants to take their land
>start deporting Germs from Danzig to different land to weaken the claim
>obviously people resist
>Poles getting frantic because Germs are an actual threat
>double down on deporting, sometimes utilizing force because Poles seriously don't want to lose Danzig
>word gets back to Uncle Addy that Poles are gunning down Germs in the street
What happens next shouldn't be hard to figure out.

It certainly wasn't an unwinnable situation for him but it would require very deft and well-informed diplomacy. His time was just constrained as he had to rush to accomplish the things he set out to and unite the German speaking people.

The real path would've been to go back to Spain and help Franco clean up his nation expeditiously and efficiently so they could've contributed. Imagine: Spanish troops crossing unchecked into France, locking down access to the Med, Winning Africa and Central Europe, Leaving Germany free to focus on Moscow for at least the first couple years.

Advise him to shave that faggety ass stache

.t watched greatest meme never told let me tell you what really happened

He should have changed command early on. He was under too much stress. Also he should have specifically reaches out to Christianity in America as an ally

>hurr well why didn't Hitler just be best friends wiff dee USSR?????

fuck off retard, you know nothing.

Why are you making arguments for me that I din't even imply
stop being so fragile friend

Uh sauce?

to kill himself and stop being a baby

A nuke shouldn't be too hard to make. You simply need some uranium, some lead, and some explosives. It's all about getting the proportions correct.

Now imagine yourself in a room, with piano wire and you telling them this

Since im polish i would try my Best to sabotage

>German people and land = All of Europe, North Africa, and parts of Asia
That's a no from me.

>Why didn't Hitler just be best friends wiff dee USSR?
Seemed to be going pretty well when they had the military cooperation in the 1930s and when they invaded Poland together.

I’d give him a history book and let him see for himself where he could have done better.
And also that he should actually gas the jews

Dont start a war

This

I would have:
>Devoted more resources to conquering England(storm the beaches with infantry and tanks with air support)
>Excuted non-compliant politicians from the conquered French and British parliaments.
>Waited 7-8 months before invading Russia
>Gave my Italian alies more support from my german military, hardware mostly.
>Advised the Japanese to not attempt to convert their infantry from 6.5 to 7.7 mid war.
>Not let the Japanese invade US territory at least until after Russia was conquered and insist they focus of invading Russia from the east.

I honestly believe these alterations to the events of ww2 could have altered who won.

>>Advised the Japanese to not attempt to convert their infantry from 6.5 to 7.7 mid war.
what does this mean

>deporting germans from Danzig
uhhhh, danzig voted on itself to join Third Reich already and majority of population was german
and at first they wanted a corridor, not a land claim (which was the reason for attack)

The primary infantry rifle for the Japanese from WW1 up until 1939 was the Type 38 Arisaka, a bolt action chambed in 6.5x50 jap. In 1939 they decided to start producing the Arisak. Type 99, a bolt action rifle chambered in 7.7mm jap. It was supposed to replace the Type 38 but because of the active war with the US they were never able to do so and towards the end of the war Type 99's started getting shipped out in terrible quality. The Japanese should have just stuck with the Type 38 and focused their war production on more advanced weaponry and munitions.

Dont piss off the Soviets, they will kill you then rape your women

Dont let the japs piss off america, they will nuke you

Keep your gains from conquering France and the other shitty countries, then offer up a peace treaty to keep what you have. Plenty of resources and space to work with already, no need to push things further until you have more material and manpower which Germany clearly didnt

Try to recruit burgeoning superpowers like india and China before the west got to them

Establish trade with resource rich nations such as in the middle east and Africa

Stop using drugs such as meth

imagine being so much of a brainlet you think having different standard issue small arms would have changed the outcome of the war

Defecf my ass to the US so I don't get executed at the end of the war.

Going for Moscow was a stupid plan and never would have worked. The only chance Germany had would be if they captured the oil fields in the Caucasus by the end of '41. Before they even invaded Russia they were running a massive deficit on oil, and without getting that oil in 41 it severely hurt their ability to maintain the offensive. But even then getting that far was 1600km away, and their chief logistian estimated their supply line could only reliably reach out 500km. But who needs supply lines and oil, especially when your doctrine revolves around heavy use of armor?

Before winter even hit in 41, Barbarossa was a failure. The German high command believed the Soviets would collapse after the initial invasion, but they didn't. They put up resistance all the way the Moscow, which is exactly what Germany didn't want/expect.

Tell Duce and the Emperor to go fuck themselves.

>implying he'll listen to anyone this time around

>help Rommel kill tHitker

literally all problems solved

This
/Thread

"Don't rape Poland. Annex only actual German land and spend the rest of your time fighting the commies. The Soviets invaded and were still invading Europe anyway, so you could even get the west to see you as a bulwark against communism, as long as you aren't retarded with your eugenics program."

Of course if you say this there's a good chance you'll get booted or worse.

And did exactly what about it?

BUY MORE GAS

Change the fucking encryption codes

Adopt the StG 44 as early as possible

Sell Pz IVs and Vs to Finland

Tell Japan to conduct a second wave at Preal Harbor and catch the US carriers returning from training with no fuel for sorties or escaping

Wipe all all the Birtish and French at Dunkirk

Don’t bother with the Tiger II or any super heavy tank

Adopt the Me 262 and use it as a fighter exclusively as soon as possible

Train partisan tactics to the Japanese via sending advisers via u Boats

Race to Moscow and fuck Stalin, sue for peace with Zukov of Krushiev

Grant Poland, Ukraine, Estonia, and Latvia independence on the condition they allow safe transit of Axis forces via their country and provide materials to the war effort to destroy the solviet union

*or khrushchev

Tell japan to calm its tits with the pacific, they can to whatever the fuck they want in north china and wait for when its soviet killing time.
Send panzers to finland and strengthen ties to sweden / norway. Play up the russian / british threats.
Do NOT attack american transports. Even if we know for a fact they are weapons do not give that warmonger a justification. In fact, as the war went on the constant weapon shipping would work AGAINST the cunt sending them over in the public eye.
Do not let the British escape at dunkirk.
Invade the now very weakened Briton until surrender.

actually the lehi were a jew fascist group he planned to give israel to in a British peace deal.
Naturally they jew'd him over and to everyone who would listen

>Devoted more resources to conquering England(storm the beaches with infantry and tanks with air support)
*laughs in Royal Navy*
Consider the number of ships required to make the landings in Normandy, now consider that the Kriegsmarine was a floating meme except for its subs and the Royal Navy was vastly superior

>not working with him to remake poland (-danzig) into a glorious modern nation in the axis

I just want to tell him that I love him and want to shake his hand

More airplanes, less wonder weapons

Friend, if the royal navy even got close to mainland Germany or occupied France later on, they got shelled hard from artillery.
They could literally shell the british beaches into not but sand and make the crossing in repurposed barges.

Why would Hirohito listen to you?
Japan had it's own pressing reasons to go to war.
Japan and Germany coordinated very little during WW2.
Except that's false. They went to war over Poland.
Letting Hitler gobble up even more land was dumb. He has shown that he was an untrustworthy warmonger in 1939 in particular, when he occupied Czechoslovakia despite previously getting what he originally demanded at Munich.
That leaves you open to an invasion from USSR while you're occupied in the West. Furthermore your war machine needs resources, and your population in particular needs food.
They absolutely did that. They murdered and starved some 16-17 million of Soviet citizens (civilians obviously). If anything that only weakened their war effort, as it motivated Soviets to fight, and it caused partisan activity in the rear.
What? Communists in Germany were either in concentration camps, extermination camps, or in exile.
You could've told him that, and it wouldn't have changed a thing. They already had an atomic weapons project. But they weren't even close to getting one.
It wasn't even developed and it wouldn't have changed shit. Small arms have a minor effect on combat, unless we are talking about extremes.
>Work harder on forming an alliance with the UK.

The basis of British policy for the last several hundred years was to prevent any continental hegemony which could then threaten them.

British did try to appease Hitler, but they would draw a line sooner or later.

Expansion east was the essence of Nazi foreign policy. Hitler outlines that clearly in Chapter XIV of Mein Kampf.

>First and foremost, procure oil fields as fast as possible.

Where? Only relevant ones were in Romania, and those weren't enough, and Germany did acquire them in WW2.
>Begin development on the Me 262 immediately AND ADD AIR BRAKES TO THEM.
British would just accelerate their own program.

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Stop being such a gay cuck

>Winston Churchill was a Rothschilde puppet and the UK is a ZOG state since forever

Churchill didn't declare war on Germany, Chamberlain did. Churchill had no government function in 1939.
Furthermore, Hitler captured several Rothschilds during the war, and he didn't do shit to them.

>More like Invade Russian and capture Moscow

Germans didn't even come close to capturing Moscow.
Moscow was a huge and fortified city. It would just be Stalingrad before Stalingrad.
And no, leaving huge Soviet forces on your southern flank intact wouldn't have been a smart move.
Soviets were well capable of biting back, as demonstrated in their counter-offensive after the Battle of Moscow.
>Don't even begin to think about bombing Britain
Just letting them bomb you would be highly unpopular, and bombing them is the only way to strike at Britain, besides the interdiction of their maritime supply lines.
>Don't invade Russia without oil
Where are you gonna get the oil? Furthermore, oil can't be stockpiled indefinitely.
>Bolt action rifles are great but semi-auto rifles are better
>Produce the assault rifle at the start
As I said above, excellent small arms offer only a marginal advantage. In WW2, as in WW1, main killer was the artillery.
>Leave poland alone, for like another year
That means you're facing more prepared UK and France, and Poland too.
>don’t attack Russia till you and Japan can hit it from both sides
Japan had no intention of attacking Soviets in 1939, especially after they got rammed at Khalkin Gol.
Besides, resources Japanese industry and war machine needed were more present and more readily available in the south.
Advancing north (east) would have been a logistical nightmare and Soviets deployed huge forces there during the entire war.
>Alliance with Japan under condition that they Attack Vladivostok
As I said above, Japanese had no intention of doing that, and just seizing Vladivostok would do shit.

How about allying with Ukrainians and other ethics despite deep hatred for slavs

>Hitler captured several Rothschilds during the war, and he didn't do shit to them.
For fear of pissing off the ones in america thus getting them in on the war

>Leave Russia alone, asshole

Expansion to the East was the basis of Nazi foreign policy. Read Mein Kampf.

>entire campaign is "hey let's reunite the German people"

Secondary goal. Hitler outright stated German Empire borders were retarded.
What he planned to do was to colonize and occupy most of Eastern Europe.
>start deporting Germs from Danzig to different land to weaken the claim

That never happened. Danzig was overwhelmingly German and local NSDAP was in power there in 1939.

>word gets back to Uncle Addy that Poles are gunning down Germs in the street

Minor persecution of Germans happened AFTER the German attack.
And how much of it was persecution is debatable, since Germans outright organized militias and started attacking Polish civilians and military.
>Spanish troops crossing unchecked into France, locking down access to the Med, Winning Africa and Central Europe, Leaving Germany free to focus on Moscow for at least the first couple years.

Germany had no resources to spare to rebuild devastated and politically divided Spain. Spanish contribution would be minor at best. I'm not sure they could even seize Gibraltar.

>Devoted more resources to conquering England(storm the beaches with infantry and tanks with air support)

German amphibious capabilities were laughable, and Luftwaffe wasn't even close to achieving any sort of air superiority needed to do that. And this is all ignoring the intact Royal Navy, which would leave your invasion force impossible to supply.
>Excuted non-compliant politicians from the conquered French and British parliaments.

They planned to do that, however Germany conquering UK is outright fantasy.

>Gave my Italian alies more support from my german military, hardware mostly.

Because Germany had hardware to spare?

>Advised the Japanese to not attempt to convert their infantry from 6.5 to 7.7 mid war.

Pretty much irrelevant, given their overall situation. Wouldn't change much.

The problem with the British invasion is the large airforce and US guns armed citizens. To add on top of that I recall a quote from Chruchill that basically said if the germans did land they'll use chemical weapons

Rommel didnt take part in the assassination though

>Dont piss off the Soviets, they will kill you then rape your women

Expanding East was the essence of Nazi ideology.

>Dont let the japs piss off america, they will nuke you

You're not in a position to order Japanese to do anything.

>Keep your gains from conquering France and the other shitty countries, then offer up a peace treaty to keep what you have

They did that, it was idiotic of UK to accept. Hitler was untrustworthy and they wouldn't let him build up strength unopposed.

>Try to recruit burgeoning superpowers like india and China before the west got to them

India is under British control and China is getting invaded by Japan and is in chaos.

>Establish trade with resource rich nations such as in the middle east and Africa

Those were all Western colonies. Jesus Christ do you know shit about history?

>Change the fucking encryption codes

They obviously did that, British cryptography was able to crack them. They were simply superior in that regard. Plus effect of that was kinda overrated.

>Adopt the StG 44 as early as possible
Small arms don't affect strategic situation, unless we are talking about extremes.

>Sell Pz IVs and Vs to Finland

They did that (not Vs). What the fuck changes? Finland is a minor combatant. Plus they had little desire to advance further, and Soviet resistance would make that hard as fuck.

>Tell Japan to conduct a second wave at Preal Harbor and catch the US carriers returning from training with no fuel for sorties or escaping

Why the fuck would Japanese let you micromanage their future operations from 5000 km away?

>Wipe all all the Birtish and French at Dunkirk

He already tried to do that. He stopped armored units because he was worried about their losses and delegated the job to Luftwaffe. They failed.

>Don’t bother with the Tiger II or any super heavy tank

Only good advice ITT as of yet.

(cont.)

>Adopt the Me 262 and use it as a fighter exclusively as soon as possible

British just accelerate their own jet program, and field it sooner than you in bigger numbers due to their superior aviation industry, plus highly probable US support.

>Train partisan tactics to the Japanese via sending advisers via u Boats

Why the fuck would Japanese adopt partisan tactics? Where would they do so?
What fucking experience did Germans have in partisan warfare at the start of the war?
Why tie down your offensive weapon against British supply routes doing something so idiotic?

>Race to Moscow and fuck Stalin, sue for peace with Zukov of Krushiev

Congratulations, you're bogged down trying to occupy a major population center, which is fortified, while you have massive Soviet forces on your highly exposed flank(s).

>Grant Poland, Ukraine, Estonia, and Latvia independence on the condition they allow safe transit of Axis forces via their country and provide materials to the war effort to destroy the solviet union
>How about allying with Ukrainians and other ethics despite deep hatred for slavs

Reason why they treated Slavs and others so shit was simple: they needed to extract food and resources there to feed their own population and war effort.

There was an economic rationale for their actions. Read about Hunger Plan.

>Friend, if the royal navy even got close to mainland Germany or occupied France later on, they got shelled hard from artillery.

Germans lack the capacity to supply their forces in UK.

You're vastly overestimating the effect of coastal artillery. British would just bomb it back or strike it from the air. These ''gamey'' tactics don't really work in real life for various reasons.

British could just mine your narrow crossing at night and wreak havoc on your supply lines.

Without a strong navy and near air supremacy, an amphibious invasion of a huge island with tens of millions of people would be downright suicidal.

So it all comes down to an air battle race then? Both sides building AA and planes until one or the other caves

If we are talking about British-German conflict in a vacuum, given their historical situation, yes.

Furthermore, it's a war of attrition that Germans will lose. British Empire can simply marshal far more resources.

However the germans would know that. They could focus defensively focusing more on AA and keeping their main plane groups in germany rather than france until needed.

Then it gets into the whole, the islands alone would have run out without imperial supply and the U-boats raiding, but america used that as a joining excuse yadda yadda

In that case, it's just a prolonged conflict which Germans still lose, as their inept leadership, chaotic economy and cost of occupying half a continent leaves them highly vulnerable.

Nazis were fucking idiots man. Nazis, in the sense of fanatic leadership, not all German leaders, many of whom were merely fellow travelers, so that say.

Here's one detail: the guy who was supposed to score an epic diplomatic coup and make an alliance with UK was also a guy who was comically inept, believed UK is actually ruled by a cabal of nobles, almost struck a British king once while meeting him and trying to give him a Nazi salute, and had previous experience as a champagne salesman. Yes, Ribbentrop. Man who also yelled at Turkish ambassador while trying to form an alliance with Turkey, because he believed Turks are dumb and wouldn't understand him if he talked normally.

Military coup, then bring back the Kaiser.

GOTT MITT UNS

but the swedish king was still around, just a bitch

Real question, Assuming the war started late or just got to a stand still. Would whoever replaced Churchill sign a peace? or would the mad aussie genocider declare no elections?

There isn't much point in doing an unprepared sea assault through the sthraights of denmark where you can be sure as fuck that they will be spotted left right and center and buttfucked by the luftwaffe. They did what they could, but sucked at it, because a shitty old french general decided that dispatchers are better then radio or morse code for delivering orders and intel. And he decided that why not keep all the reserves back and watch his own forces get surrounded.