Stolen Valor thread/stories

Im a proud larper dont give 2 fucks. I never claim to be in anything so not breaking the law. I like to run my drills and shoot prone in acu cause its comfy. I never understood this bullshit. Its not like most military fags know how to shoot anyway. Theyre pretty shit at it and never shot at anyone. Most navy fags never even shoot an ar. If I can run drills and tactical reloading better than non combat arm fags and even some combat mos I should be able to show off that im the lifestyle. I know its sounds autistic but fudds wouldnt understand anyway. Its a lifestyle faggots thread is cancer anyway.

>be me
>wear fleck parka when out because warm, comfy, and poorfag
>at least once a week have someone try to trap me in a stolen valor reee-ing
>"are you even from germany?" "were you in the german military"
>no, this jacket was very cheap and its very comfortable
>see them visibly anger like a gamestop tranny even though i've made no felonious claims

leave me alone you fucks i'm just walking my dog or getting groceries

Next time, tell the person that you're wearing a civilian version with the camouflage disabled. That's why they can see you.

tit

Rare example of female stolen valor witnessed in denver airport in 2014

>Be Marine sergeant
>going home on leave
>see chick in desert marpat in the airport, no name tapes, no rank, wearing trousers unbloused and has cover on despite being inside
>tons of people fawning over her
>just decide to sit and listen to the stupidity pour out of this dumb bitches mouth while her fans ooh and aww over her for a while
>kek and board my flight because I'm not an insecure sperg and I dont give half a shit and just wanna go home

>neverserved as fuck
>late 20s
>beard
>tattoos
>muscles
>cashiers always ask if I was in the military
>say "yes but I don't have my ID" and get the discount anyway because they never bother to verify
>thank me for my service on my way out

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I had some fat middle aged guy sperg out at me in similar fashion in a costco when I was like 12 because I had a flecktarn milsurp jacket my dad bought me at some army navy store. Guy was all:

> "YOU WERENT EVER IN THE GERMAN MILITARY!"
>well duh, im 12
>"WHERE ARE YOUR PARENTS"
>somewhere around
>"DO THEY KNOW YOURE WEARING THAT?"
>yeah, my dad bought it for me
>"WELL MAYBE I NEED TO HAVE A WORD WITH HIM"
>if you talk to him like you talk to me he's going to punch you in the mouth

He huffed away jowls a-quiver. Even as a kid I was like "if you get off on yelling at kids in public for literally nothing you probably arent all there mentally."

shit thats a good one, i don't have any stories yet but i've had some friends have incidents like that cause they were wearing a surplus erdl jacket or something. I've had some fudd stories so ill follow this up :)

>I've always kind of regretted never asking him about it
Why the fuck would you want to? Just let the autists be autists and take comfort in the knowledge that they're the biggest retard in the room instead of causing a massive scene.

>>if you talk to him like you talk to me he's going to punch you in the mouth
kek, my dad would have done the same when I was that age

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me again, fudd story from last month

>going to range
>about an hour drive to the desert
>dad has membership i go as a guest for $5
>get to gate
>dad in back of cab
>in muh truck
>im driving
>old fudd in raised chevy blocking gate entrance
>only way in so wait and wave him forward
>guy stares at me thru his m frames or some shit
>ffs move cunt
>he rolls towards us at like 2mph
>rolls down window
>dad says
>user i think he wants to talk
>ffs dad
>roll window down

keep in mind im 19 and look like im maybe 16 when clean shaved

>fudd goes "you a member? aint seen you around here"
>"no my dad is hes in the back"
>fudd blankly stares at me
>asks "what you shooting?"
>new glock, m16
>"are you of age? you know you can't have handguns"
>pissed at this point
>dad on his phone
>thx dad
>go "yeah i am"
>fudd just fucking stares at me
>like i just rapid fired more than one round per 2 seconds
>"well alright"
>fudd drives away
>"dad do i have to play 20 fucking questions everytime i wanna come here?"
> dad goes "don't worry user hes just old"
>exactly dad

mfw this happened 2 more times in the past month
>fuck that place
>bunch of fudds
more stories incoming

>be at a K-Mart
>see 10 year old with camoflouge crocs and a MAGA hat on
>stab him to death for his stolen valor

Doing god’s work user.

Blessed be, brave user.

Be me
>College fag
>Been part of 3 ROTC wings(Kicked out from the last wing)
>Regular collgefag
>Get a military cut
>Tell people I'm in the ROTC
>Get respect from friends and family

second fudd story
>at some range
>at a bay shooting steel with dad's new g43
>hes in the porta john
>mag dumping steel plates
>hit all shots
>mfw
>reloading mags and about to rack slide
>hear car behind me
>wtf.jpg
>old fatass in a honda van pulls up 10ft behind me
>slowly slides out
>keep shooting
>finish rapid firing into a plate
>walk back to table to reload
>fatass fudd comes over
>"hey kid when are you gonna be done here?"
>"why?"
>fudd goes "well i wanna shoot at this bay and i don't have all day"
>this fucking cunt oml
>tell him I just got here
>literally 18 bays at this desert shithole
>not a shithole actually
>nice but fudds are cancer
>tell him theres like 6 handgun bays open
>"no i like this one"
>dad gets back from shitter
>fudd asks when we'll be done
>fill dad in on fatasses deal
>dad says we'll leave in a minute
>tells me we'll shoot the m16 then do glock shit later
>fine
>pack up
>decided to walk to rifle bay cuz 50ft away
>dad drives truck over to bay
>as im leaving pistol bay
>fudd goes
>"hey you can't have that handgun in your pants!"
>ffs
>"look im going to a couple bays over noone else is here chill out"
>"you fucking kids, thinking you're hot shit"
>whatever cunt
>look back
>he pulls out a .44
>starts shooting
>missing horribly
>get to rifle bay
>can see bay hes at from here
>he leaves shooting maybe 4 chambers worth
>idk what to call it not a revolver fag
>so this cunt
>has the audacity
>to get uppity with me
>when theres 18 bays
>then leaves after 10 minutes
>fuck you fatass

This is in Central OR and if you can guess the range im talking about then kudos to you. Don't worry tho anons i've since been going early in the morning and since its winter those old fucks can't tolerate the cold compared to my young chad 19 year old killing machine body

i'm reminded of that black kid who dressed up as a doctor and went door to door offering breast examinations

yeah, my dad was 5'11 and 150 pounds soaking wet. His job was heavy equipment mechanic and he spent all day breaking loose 3 inch bolts and shit so he was muscular as fuck. First real man on man fistfight I ever saw.

>be young, maybe like 5 or six
>dad comes back from an on the road service call to pick me up from grandmas and take me to the mall
>(mom wasnt in the picture)
>get some icecream, and a toy dump truck
>in parkinglot, sitting in seat of dad's truck while he finishes his cig outside
>guy walking by, visibly drunk, slurring a drunken rendition of fuck da police
>dad: "quit that, my kid is right here"
>"fffuuuuuck you assh hole"
>dad "I told you to quit talkin like a filthy pig"
>"whatre you goan do bout it motherfucker?"
>dad flicks his cig at the guys face, cold-cocks him in the gut with his left and follows with an almost immiediate right hook into the spot just below the ear and behind the jaw
>guy keels over immiediatley unconscious and is laying spread eagle
>pisses himself
>dad gets in the car
>"dont tell grandma, its guy stuff"
>"like peeing outside or farting?"
>"yeah, stuff you dont do in front of ladies"
>"okay!"
>eat icecream and play with toy dump truck all the way back home

I used to like seeing stolen valor types getting busted and wondered why they did what they did. These days I don’t really care anymore. Live and let live. Its pretty funny how the high strung types along with the barracks bunny facebook thots tend to drone on about “I had a buddy or cheated on a guy that wore that uniform, show some respect reeeee”

>MEN DIED FOR THAT UNIFORM!
>MEN DIED FOR THAT FLAG!
>MEN DIED FOR THIS COUNTRY!

I fought in iraq and afghan. Seen a few men die. I can tell you that a scrap of cloth on a stick, some smelly set of dirty cammies, or some lines on a map were probably thier least concern when they passed.

your dad's awesome. my dad was 6'4 and did pipefitting and engineering
this story doesn't have to do with protecting me but anyway
>him and I are driving home from shopping or something when I was around 7
>watch someone get hit in their car and the other driver tried to run
>my dad drives to prevent the guy who hit the car from driving away
>dad gets out and runs up to the driver side window yelling at him wondering what the fuck he's doing
>guy had his window rolled down and my dad has his hands on the door
>guy attempts to roll up the window
>my dad just fucking destroys the window and forcefully shuts off the guys car and tosses his keys somewhere on the side of the road
>cops eventually come and ask what the fuck is going on and it gets squared away, guy who got hit thanked my dad for helping out and such
I can't remember anything else after that desu

your father sounds awesome. Is his cock big?

>it's a lifestyle
t. not actually living the lifestyle
If you've never been in the military, even I know more about "the lifestyle" as a six month conscript

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>got a bundeswehr tracksuit awhile ago
>it's comf af and I wear the track top whenever I go out
>some dude starts speaking german to me in the liquor store since he sees the patch on the front
>give a little chuckle "Sorry, I don't speak a lick of German"
>a frown forms on his ugly face
>"So you just wear that because you want to act the part huh?" he says in a very cunty tone
>lol in his face before looking serious
>yell "No I won't buy you booze you fucking crackhead"
>pay for my shit and walk out
>minge is still yelling at me for causing a scene as I drive away

>be me 24 at the time
>brother in marines
>gave me brown winter beanie
>love how tight fitting it is
>wear it in winter always
>at town bar
>enjoying the night
>some guy, about my age comes up and asks if i'm military
>immediately suspect where he's going
>"no, i'm not why?"
>"why are you pretending to be blah blah"
>"fuck you pal it's just a hat"
>"get kicked out of bar by fudd bouncers for arguing with a boot"
>buy tight fitting under armor beanie to replace it
>take very dim view of people my age who "fight for my freedom"

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>getting mad over a beanie
boots gonna boot

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Stolen valor laws are utterly retarded.

>at my local Sandwich shop (Blimpies if you've heard of them)
>Been craving the Italian Fatboy all day, fucking get in me already
>Walk in and there's this fat fuck middle ages dude mouth breathing as he waits for the worker to finish his sandwich
>It appears the Boomer's sandwich is somewhere under all the mayo
>Fat fuck waddles his ass towards the pay counter grabbing 3 bags of Doritos on his way, gasping for air the entire time
>QT working the counter rings him up, he just stands there like a tard
>"Does that price include veteran's discount?"
>QT says no, the store doesn't even offer such a discount
>Yelling and gurgling ensues as Boomer loses his god damned mind
>"I fought and almost died for this country you bitch, you and this establishment should show proper respect" etc
>QT looks entirely put off and nervous because Boomer is quite loud
>Manager comes over, asks the problem, finally says "if you have some sort of military ID, I'd be happy to knock off 10%"
>Boomer freaks out "why the fuck do I need ID? Can't you just take my word for it?"
>"No sir"
>Further Boomer reee-ing as he fumbles in his wallet for cash and storms out the door
>Get my Italian Fatboy

Dunno if "stolen valor" , but what's with people thinking others should lick their fucking boots because of the CHANCE that you served? Only people I'd feel sorry for are those who were truly drafted against their will. 99% of those I've met usually don't even ask for the military discount. It's always the window lickers who voluntarily signed up who want to be treated like God's.

My dad was a short, fat, little bitch, that picked on service workers, beat his kids, hated guns, and cut off contact with his brothers before he died for "being nazis". After which, my mother found out that he gambled away everything she had saved, including the mortgage and his life insurance.

Be proud of the genes you have, pass them on.

Sociopaths and borderlines will often use tantrums, because they simply see them as effective tactics, without feeling any empathy for the people that have to suffer through them. They'll also be the first to threaten to/call the police, they're great liars (no guilt) but many have never learned (or felt the desire to learn) how to control their emotions, so they'll simply repurpose/find excuses for them

I used to wonder, “Do you have any shame?” When I saw folks threatening to sue over 1 inch of subway sub, and raising a huge stink over little things.
Turns out, no, they do not.

Was it cossa?

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How can you steal valor from someone that doesnt have any?

>be young marine
>grow up
>smoke pot
>listen to alex jones
>”ITS ALLL BULL SHIT MANNNNNNN!!!!”
>quit
>years later find young marines t shirt at good will
>floods of nostalgia; fuck yes
>filled with child like pride at my young marines t shirt
>wear it in a large city for years no one says shit think nothing of it
>move to small town people start asking if im a marine, i tell them no its a young marines shirt
>people thank me for my service its embarrassing
>start to think “Jesus maybe i should stop wearing this shirt?”

That was until

>at bar
>young marines shirt on
>sperg vet asks me what the young marines are. (He was testing me he only told me a he was a vet after I explain it to his satisfaction, >everything's cool.
>later his friend comes around sees shirt gets very angry.
>i feel horribly embarrased and angry
>stop
>realize fuck them i was a young marine i love this shirt and i keep wearing it

I wore it till i lost it in a move. Not quite stolen valor but people tried to make the argument that i was somehow stealing valor. (It was the shirt they hand out to the parents of young marines btw) but based on that experience in the bar and a number of other ones while wearing that T-shirt. Im all about stolen valor and i think its probably one of the funniest trolls you can pull It leterally makes everyone mad and some vets chimp out. Who got a hero complex because of what they went threw. I don’t feel like i have to qualify myself but i know many marines irl and LETERALLY none have had a problem with the shirt. Probably because they knew me and understood that I wasn’t trying to get in on the hero warship train. I just liked the ficking shirt. Pic related.

If i had more balls and wasn’t afraid of being video taped doing it I honestly would steal valor irl and say the dumbest shit just to annoy people. Maybe one of you is brave enough cuz it’s something id really like to see.

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This, nothing to be proud about being willing to die for Israel

>smoking the hippie lettuce and listening to globalist conspiracy theories
I like how you did exactly the opposite of what Young Marines told you.
Did they ever find out?

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When I died in Iraq I was pretty concerned about the flag and country. I didn't mind too much the uniform was destroyed considering it was designed to get dirty.

I was in it for like four years i started smoking pot and listening to alex jones in like 2006. I probably would of quit anyways, baised on just getting older its just so happens those where the ironic change of interests that catalyzed it. But they never found out.

They mever get it right though. Youll see supposed SSGTs with their ribbons 1.5 inches above the right breast pocket, or some guy i usmc cammies with his eod badge sideways. This shit is impossible to fick up for actual enlisted ehich is why stolen valor stands out so bad

I have plenty of stories / encounters of SV. The most recent was yesterday, standing in line at Domino's. The fella in front of me was wearing a Vietnam Vet hat. I asked him if he was Army (since I was). He said yep, with a sort of air in is voice. I asked him what is MOS was. He mumble something. I asked again, leaning in closer to hear. He said he was a door gunner but after Vietnam, in Fort Carson he was a "military police." Said he was in for 17 years. I didn't inquire about being short 3 but asked what his MOS designation was. It should have been 91 series. He didn't have a fucking clue. He didn't even know I was in the Army - even though I was wearing a beanie with a huge 82nd Airborne patch on the front. After he realized I knew what right and wrong answers were he lost interest in talking to me.

What a fuck cnut.

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Meanwhile in finland only camo that someone cares about is m05.
Everything else is pretty fine and only kids might ask anything.

You should wear a mc Donald's uniform those guys get mad respect

Meanwhile, in the United States, our service means something to our public..

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What did you do

Two years ago - and he is still living rent free in your head.

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>have plenty of stories / encounters of SV. The most recent was yesterday, standing in line at Domino's. The fella in front of me was wearing a Blue GSD hat. I asked him if he was Reppin (since I was). He said yep, with a sort of air in is voice. I asked him what street he was from. He mumble something. I asked again, leaning in closer to hear. He said he was south highest gangster bloods but after His time in the trap, he was in Fort Carson he was a "MOBB gorrilla crew." Said he was in for 17 years. I didn't inquire about being short 3 but i said “isnt big smoke the OG ova there?” He didn't have a fucking clue. He didn't even know I was Reppin south heights gangster bloods - even though I was wearing a blue beanie with a huge blue shirt with GSD on it. After he realized I knew what right and wrong answers were he lost interest in talking to me.

Brave and heroic. Not unlike the knee jerk bravado culture we see in our lower IQ communities. Only difference between you an them is you didn’t shoot him for stealing valor.

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>be an exchange student in US
>out on a range with a local friend
>wearing m91 camo
>have Finnish flag, unit and branch insignia on my shoulder
>autistic screeching from someone
>respond to his every question in Finnish
>rummage my pockets and slap on the corporal insignia I had taken off
>mfw

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I guess its a similar situation across all countries with conscription. When everyone has their own sets of uniforms any camo uniform becomes less significant.

Thang yuo fer yuor serbice :-DDDDDD

In your mind, you just made a point.
Join the Army Infantry. Then you can make a real point.

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Never actually experienced one that I remember but back in high school some kid that wanted to go to rotc and be an army officer gave me shit for wearing camo pants (pretty redneck town, he was just an autistic besides also being a boot ass motherfucker) even though they weren’t even woodland, just kinda looked like it

Good fuggin job gorbral

I wore camo pants at college and I always thought someone would ask but they never did.

Now,I keep thinking I was doing it ,even though I was not and they were just pants.

Thanks but no thanks

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>not being in the military
Oof that sucks

That is why you are and will likely always be, dismissed in the company of men.

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Don't let your sensitivities overwhelm you. Step up. Do something that will define you as a man in this world - in this short life. Join the Infantry. It;s the toughest we have to offer. The best training on Earth Be a war fighter.

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That guy on the right has a fabulous haircut.

Had to talk my NEET friend out of getting some insignia tattooed on him. His argument was "well I dont see it as stolen valor because I'm not trying to pretend I was in the service I just think it looks cool"

>die for Israel, this will define if you're a man or not!
Thanks Shlomo

Very clever

what's the other option? Slave away for mr shecklestine so he can buy a second personal jet?

At least you won't get killed fighting mr. Nosenberg enemies

I just say those guys died for MUH FREE HEALTHCARE and MUH FREE COLLEGE

>3rd Nigger Battalion

Your dad sounds like a bitch boy.

>Be Bama bro
>Tons of people here wear camo
>Usually just a jacket and/or pants
>Woodland, Marpat, Tricolor desert, Multicam, OCP, etc.
>No one ever cares because it's just a thing here
>Never had one instance of "muh stolen valor"
>Military vets from various organizations stand outside stores asking for donations
>give them a few dollars every now and then if I have cash on me
>Sometimes do it with camo on
>Thank me for donation and ask if I'm a vet
>Always just say "No i just like the camos"
>Say cool, and wish me a good day
People are pretty chill around here.

It's called a cylinder.

Not really Stolen Valor in the true / US sense, but I kinda am a bigtime valor thief.

>be me
>fukken RABID patriot
>I'm not serving this pozzed EU-loving government and getting sent to Afghanistan, Eritrea or, heavens forbid, Ukraine
>I'm not joining the paramilitaristic wannabe nazis either
>already buying milsurp, because it is unironically better quality than civilian shit for all purposes except for showing up at weddings or dates
>friend cheats cucked Europoor gun laws, claims he feels threatened for living in a high-crime area because GYPSIES live on his street
>full-range civilian gun lincense GRANTED, he only can't get proper military guns
>try the same thing
>get everything except for combat shotguns
>imokaywiththis
>practice shooting privately
>sometimes make a joint exercise with the wannabe paramilitary
>paramilitary gets busted for cheating the system and buying armored vehicles which they shouldn't have been buying on a museum permit
>glows leave me alone
>did my own survival and shooting training, manuals for the most commons service funs memorized
>navigation, rapid relocation and woodland survival disguised as hiking vacations
>have a small garden on a hill behind city, one of the neighbors is a veteran and the other is a ham radio operator
>know the local radio jargon even if it's useless, since the military doesn't actually follow its own playbook ("requesting long range connection to *cheesy callsign*" "What?" "Just get me Hradec Kralove command")
It has gotten to the point where actual military personnel address me as one of their own.

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>be a Finnish citizen
>holiday in USA
>go to a world war II museum
>Have you served in the military, sir?
>respond: yes in Finland
>reseive a veteran discount
>thank you for your service
>feel bad for being thanked for mandatory conscription service

My 5 year old son put in my black PT fleece cap once and I mercilessly mocked him for his stolen valor until he cried.

Gorpral kepping us save. XDDD

dog bless you finland man
Did you get the discount at the resturants as well?

Budweiser tracksuit? Right on

>Be a salior
>Wear Aor2 type iii parka with Marine woodland trouser (Insignias removed ofcourse)
>Receive autistic screeching.

I dont give a fuck the parka and liner is comf af and my command doesnt give a shit anyway so long as your aren't a jackass.

This literally does not happen. Not one motherfucker in America gives a fuck about obvious surplus like foreign camos or woodland from the 90s. Imagine being so fucking gay you even steal Stolen Valor. Bozo.

Dad dicks always are.
t. father of four

lmao did they tip you too

Lol

Good job, son.

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This
How about not taking freedom away from your fellow man by boycotting the anti American zog machine

Lmao, imagine thinking the Army is anything but fucking human dregs they cheese through to make quotas. Either join the Marine Infantry or the French Foreign Legion, or some highspeed shit on an 18X or SEAL contract, if they still offer those and you got the legs for it. Joining bozo ass army infantry and sitting around with herding niggers and beaners for your 4 years is fucking stupid. Even trannies can make it in the Army infantry, without being bullied to suicide by their peers. Absolute zero testosterone environment for gamers and wannabes to feel good about themselves in. Real rockhead knuckledragging turbo-racist cannibal goons join the Marines or go SF/Rangers/Seals/Etc.

>be me
>10 years ago
>retarded teen at california flea market
>see a military surplus stand at 30% markup
>buy a shitty military jacket because I think it looks cool
>3 weeks later
>40 degree out
>wear jacket to local mccuckolds
>some broad starts asking if I am in the military
>Keep in mind I am wearing blue jeans, a shitty band shirt, cheap shoes and the jacket (going commando)
>tell her it is just a jacket
>genuinely baffled that you can buy "part of a military uniform"

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>be me
>working as manager at sandwich shop
>only 17, so not able to enlist as of yet
>Asian lady and her boyfriend come in
>order their food
>"your total is $11.11 ma'am. Anything else today?"
>"You have a Minotaury discount?"
>"yeah... Can I see some ID?"
>she shows some ID that says us army or whatever
>I really wante to enlist at the time, so I ask every veteran the same questions
>"Excuse me ma'am, what's your MOS?"
>"my what?"
...
>"What do you do for the military?"
>"oh, I'm not in the military"
>"then why did I give you the military discount?"

I wear this shirt and half way thru thanking me people look in disgust which make me bust a gut laughing. TShirtHell.com

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I remeber this one kid that wore either those olive drab or woodland acu/bdu pants whichever they were, but what bothered me so much about it is that he never tucked the laces of his boots. They were always just hanging out there and flopping all about. He would have looked pretty sharp otherwise, but those laces were his downfall

I don’t get it

I say kid, but it was a college art class