ITT s/k/ool stories

Implying God don't like that

Alright, a story from my youth then user.
>be me
>be 17
>at home with only my brother and grandpa, who asleep.
>live in the ghetto at this time and we have crackheads as neighbors
>this night they're so high, that they were rooting and tooting on a Tom & Jerry episode like it was the superbowl
>me and bro go down in garage to do some workouts, spot a half empty Corona on the ground when uncle and grandpa were drunk
>neighbors are still high as balls
>lightbulb.gif
>craft the beer bottle into the most bootlegged molotov
>Grab our cap guns from Disneyland (you know back when they still had them)
>grab a firework motor with one last firework leftover from the 4th of july
>go outside wearing scarfs and rags inorder to larp as Taliban
>Me and Bro simatausly start screaming out the gmod jihad bomb
>along with that firing the motor and throwing the molotov over to there yard, with cap guns going off
>neighbors freak out instantly and started running back in forth, losing their shit
>After 5 minutes, go back inside house and hide evidence
>Surprisely the cops weren't called
>neighbor never knew who were the goatfuckers that night
>Brother still laughs about til this day.

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bump

School related, at least.
>Asked the school to go and hold a presentation for the kids to join the local gun club or take the hunting exam
>Sure enough, get an hour to present
>Take my guns with because they're obviously part of the package
This being in rural Norway, there are no metal detectors or cops in the doorways. Felt like that bears mentioning, lest someone call bullshit on it.
>Roll a big ol case into the classroom and start talking about what goes on
>"And this is what we use"
>Open the case and pull out my Sauer
>Teacher just about flips and says "why don't you put those away", but I break her off with an "ABsoLUTELY not an option, this is *sporting equipment*"
>Kids get to handle it, try aiming at a point on the blackboard, snap caps click, all is well
>Pull out my shotgun and pass around
>Snap caps click, kids having a good time
>Pull out my lever gun, intentionally with one primed casing in the chamber
>First kid cocks it and pulls the trigger
>BANG
>Everybody jumps to and screeches
>Yell at the kids "WHEN HANDED A GUN, YOU GOTTA KNOW WETHER IT'S LOADED OR NOT"
>Kids get over the shock and begin laughing
>Teacher just shook her head and gave up
Gave the kids notes to take home, see if their parents would let them sign on for the course or the club, and got ten kids signed up for the course.
I guess match shooting isn't as interesting, but whatever puts guns in children's hands is good in my book.
Bloody shame about it too, skoleskyting (lit. school shooting) used to be a subject in schools. Pic related, the Krag-Jorgensen M/1906 Guttekarabin (Boys' carbine) they used.

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KEK

based schitzo poster question mark?

good work user

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>be me
>inna middle school
>fascinated with explosives and things that go boom
>dumbass me decides to print off the ones I like most
>keep it in the back "hidden" pocket of my zipper folder
>leave folder in 1st period class
>niggers go through my folder "trying to find out who it belongs to" despite my name being on every paper right up front
>get called into office
>admit it's all mine
>get suspended for two days
Fuck CA and fuck niggers going through my shit. So glad I moved

How come we been getting Schizophrenic posters lately?

...

Bump

>one primed casing in the chamber
>kid cocks it and pulls the trigger
>it goes bang
Heh, your story is bullshit, if it had one in the chamber and he cocked it, the chambered round would have extracted

>be me 17
>go to shitty high school in ghetto niggerville due to my own town not having our own school system
>drive pickup truck and wear jeans/boots to niggerville high
>everyone knows i'm an outdoorsman and right wing
>everyone knows I fish/hunt/own guns
>come in wearing hoodie one day because fuck you the midwest gets chilly
>Anons County 4H Trapshooting
>chimpout.jpg
>reported to administrator by homeroom teacher
>admin calls mom and asks to search truck
>no fuck off
>gets SRO in on it
>"I have probable cause"
>fuckingkikes.gif
>forces me to open truck
>I have a box of 12 gauge target loads in the glove box from trap practice
>lockdown school
>get expelled
>mfw

>getting expelled for birdshot
jesus christ I didn't think this world could get any worse

Lever guns often have external hammers that can be cocked or decocked without cycling the action, user.

a tale as old as time.

Im glad we have a schizo poster...it makes me feel more at home.

Serves them right.

Bump

>be 16 i think
>in english
>me and mate think it would be funny to wear gas masks in class
>next day we have gas masks in backpacks
>wait till she is writing on board
>quickly put masks on
>teacher turns around we just writing notes
>the look on her face was perfect
>we did a few things like that
>she was pretty cool with it just found it funny and carried on
>we wore them for the rest of class
>we live in nz so no cops called

Bump

are you me? they still call me a school shooter at my old high school. hide your power level kids.

It's nice to read a tard story written from the tard's perspective for once

I have so many god damn Jow Forums related stories from age 17-21 its ridiculous. Grew up in south texas, lots of dirt roads and woods to hide in and started working in refineries right after I graduated so I had tons of money to feed my gun habit and do stupid shit with.

>buddy is coming home from boot camp and me and a couple friends decide to do something special while hes back
>go to academy and accumulate about 30 pounds of tannerite over the course of a month or so
>buy some old shitty car for 500$
>absolutely destroy it before he gets home, drift it around on dirt roads and go spotlighting with it and wreck it no less than 10 times
>when he gets back the trans is so fucked we have to pull it into my buddies field
>mix the tannerite into cat litter jugs and sit them in the drivers seat
>back up ~250 yards and shoot it with my buddies AR
>pic related
>massive explosion, way bigger than anticipated
>doors shoot out about 100 yards on either side, roof completely detaches and shoots up like 75 feet
>facebook posts from people that live 20 miles away asking what that sound was
>everyone thought one of the various oilfield sites exploded
>massive police response

Ive got some more about our times riding around and shooting anything that moved later

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>get my own house at 19 or 20
> move from way out in the woods with no phone service to the middle of town, albeit a super quiet neighborhood with only 1 close neighbor
>massive feral cat problem
>neighbors are crackheads with 20+ dogs chained up behind my house that constantly bark
>feral cats keep coming to my window and starting shit with my cat and dogs keep barking and generally annoying the fuck out of me
>lightbulb.jpg
>buy some sort of bolt action 22 and put a 1-6 scope on it and duct tape a g2x to it
>had full view of neighbors yard from my back door
>every time a dog would bark, Id pop the door open and shoot the dog in the ass with a subsonic .22, wasnt powerful enough to break skin but obviously hurt
>eventually the dogs learned to stop barking
>shift my focus to the cats
>would bait them to my front door step and shoot them in the head
>probably killed 25+ cats this way
>one night a dog kept barking and I couldnt see it very well and I accidentally shot it in the head
>drops dead
>an hour or so later I hear yelling
>crack the back door to listen
>crackhead neighbors blaming each other for not feeding/watering the dog, thinks it died of dehydration
>kek

Haha, reminds me of my high school shenanigans
>start high school
>go to boarding school, get pocket money for the first time
>start by spending it on comics, vidya, 14 year old bullshit (well, not just bullshit, I bought the first stalker game this year)
>discover milsurp shop in town
>ohshitnigger.wav
>start spending almost all of my money there
>start having nice collection
>other boarders find it cool as fuck
>start regularily lending my kit to other guys, we fuck around in milsurp for entire evenings, going for dinner wearing it and quoting generation kill
>even sport chads and girls get into it, not just autists and the sons of soldiers or hunters
>get kissed by a girl for the first time in this context, I lent her an east german peaked hat and flecktarn jacket and ahe "thanked" me like that
>let her have the fleck jacket afterwards, still kept the NVA hat
>this becomes a habit, gets worse in 2nd year as someone else with the same level of autism arrives
>keep going, just with more red army choirs singing
>after 1 year and a half, decide to step it up
>buy a GP-6 gasmask during a school trip to Russia
>bring it to dorms, everyone fonds it's the coolest shit ever, have fun talking, breathing, shaking their heads while wearing it
>some guy even gets motorboated with the mask by his gf, nobody's jealous because she's fat as fuck
>decide to expand autistic ops beyond the realm of the dorm
>disciplinary assistants have begun finding it funny, vice director is tired of that shit but gave up
>shitsnotfunny.mpeg
>sneak the gasmask in during classes
>have slavspeak lesson
>learn that first year students are in that room just before my group
>conveniently go to the shitter 10 min before the end of the lesson just before the russian one
>go through the empty corridors, run like a mad cunt because the two classrooms are far from each other
>arrive to thw door of the russian classroom, breathing deeply and cackling like a retard
>cont.

Story from college.
>be me edgy 18 year old
>see some guys I knew from high school at another table in the cafeteria
>go up to them with my backpack slung over my chest with my right hand in the main pocket
>go up to them and say "you guys where nice to me in high school so you should go to the bathroom now"
>the look on their faces was priceless
>they though I was actually gonna do it
>tell them I'm fucking with them
>they have a massive sigh of relief
>chat with them for a bit then leave for class

How bad is it that they actually though I was gonna shot up the school?

>1996
>Be me
>Florida
>Shit high school filled with gangs, predominantly Bloods
>I'm a fat, white nerd
>Get the shit kicked out of me on a daily basis by niggers
>Try to go for the mentally unstable look
>Wear trench coat in Florida heat with Metallica shirts
>Get my ass kicked worse, left arm gets a hairline from big nigger named Troy
>Finally had enough
>Spend week end at grandparents
>Pocket my grand fathers old snub nose 38, think it was a Smith
>Monday, sit in class, all I can think about is ending that nigger
>School PA comes on, " code: safe day "
>School is on lock down
>Never get to live out my revenge plot
>Go home
>Hear on news that there was a massive fight at my school
>Next day I hear Troy is breathing through a tube, started some shit with another gang
>Go back to grandparents the following week end, put 38 back

Never got my revenge personally, but, worked out better this way.

>don gasmask in front of door, still with ragged breathing
>wait for the bell for the longest 45 seconds of my life so far
>there it goes
>innocent, happy, little blond girl with thin round metal glasses opens
>CHEEKI BREEKI MOTHERFUCKER
>girl screams, falls, knocks down the other 3 girls behind her domino style
>russian teacher is surprised for half a second but is too tired of my shit to actually do something
(Well that may have been because she got drunk as fuck during our russian trip and we helped her look decent when meeting with local representatives during an official meeting there, sho she owed me and my friends one)
>the 1st year russian class guys laugh their ass off
>a girl from my group who arrived a little bit after me laughs her ass off
>cheeki breeki'd glasses girl remained scarred but she laughed when she recognised me 5 years later in university
And that's how Jow Forums was a thing in my life before I ever discovered Jow Forums and Jow Forums in general (inb4 newfag)

Bump

>be 13
>have a tiny Swiss army knife, the blade is maybe 2 inches
>use it to sharpen pencils because it results in a nicer point than with sharpener
>don't even think somebody might have a problem with it
>apparently I'm wrong
>some student sees it, makes a fuss
>get a talk with the principal
>knife is confiscated, only returned to parents
To this day I don't understand why was it such a big deal.
One could have probably done more damage with a pencil rather than with that thing.

A grand tale

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BUMP

Ted Bundy?

>me and my buddies would work for a couple months and make enough money to be off for 4 or 5 months and just fuck off
>every night we would pile in my buddies suburban and ride around dirt roads and shoot anything that moved
>spent tons of money on spotlights and making the best possible gun to maneuver inside a vehicle, be quiet to avoid detection by land owners and game wardens, and be accurate all at the same time
>on an average night we could get about 15 rabbits, and sometimes a deer or 2
>at the end of the night wed just go to my friends house and cook all the shit we killed and have a good time
>one night we werent going to hunt, just go out and do some shooting so we all brought ARs, AKs, one guy had one of those keltec 22 magnum rifle things
>coming back from shooting spot
>spot a group of 15ish deer in a field
>jackpot.jpg
>windows roll down, lights cut on, and 8 niggas with semi auto rifles magdump into these deer
>we made a ton of noise and there was a house close by, so we book it
>come back 3 hours later
>shell casings everywhere, 7 dead deer
>we call the incident lil fallujah

Nice copypasta saw this on a different thread today.

Cool stories user. A well deserved (you).

you bambi'd those fuckin' deer. nice.

I'm the one who wrote this fucker

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inner city or just a moron? (its okay being 12 is hard)

I was a goddamn theatre kid in HS, but a kid did a presentation on firearms, he even brough some home made gunpowder (not sure how he made it), anyway he got suspended after lighting it on a desk to show it off. This was a serious deal cause im in canada and the suburbs.

I think they are AI learning to shitpost

Did you process the deer? I dont like meat wasting user.

damn nobody gave you any love for this haha

your mom never wastes meat

>be teacher
>Despite being ghetto, no Jow Forums happenings
I'm sure that some of these kids are armed.

That's where I learned not to be wasteful.

>middle school
>electronics nerd
>take apart dozens of used disposable cameras for the 330v capacitor and charging circuit to make coil guns
>start adding two prongs to the cameras to zap people
>looks like a normal camera
>hand out a dozen to friends at school football game
>get kicked out and almost expelled after dozens of people get zapped

That went a hell of a lot better than I was expecting.
They put me in a special class, told people not to be my friend and had kids go through my desk and trash whenever I left the room, among other things.
Then they used my lack of friends, trust in others and social skills to try and put me on drugs. Cunts.

Where im from in Norway the Kids go to the shooting range during the konfirmasjon teaching (konfirmation?) basicly the priest organizes it and the parents bring guns.

When i went there where a krag, a couple of sakos (30-06 and 308) 2-3 different shotguns. and rifle in 223 or something like that.

It is a whole weekend excursion with camping in the forrest, setting fishing nets, shooting, campfire stories, learning to gut fish, and ofcourse talking about Jesus inbetween.

when i was in the 6th grade a couple of kids i went to school with got shot and killed by their mom. that's pretty Jow Forums

Yes, we always processed them the same night and ate most of it the same night. Wed have big ass bbqs whenever we got several deer

>freshman highschool year
>get obsessed with flame throwers
>4th of July a few days away
>can't find much info besides retards with a can of ax and a lighter calling it an EPIC FLAMETHROWER!!1
>rich friend is having huge party at his place, small lake with an island in the middle and shit, paddle boat access
>decide to see what is laying around the yard because poorfag with horder dad
>assemble two propane tanks and various air fittings together
>one tank is filled with air
>second filled with kerosene and a dip tube leading to a siphon spray gun
>use random pieces of aluminum siding and hose clamps to attach a small green propane cylinder with torch to the end of spray gun
>fix the last leak and put the last fitting on at his place with around 15 people hovering over me cackling like a madman around 10 PM
>pressurize to 120psi
>use paddle boats to take this heavy as fuck setup to the island
>works flawlessly, 40 feet of flame
>drunken night of fire and fireworks
Here's a video of a test a few days later.
youtu.be/5lhOGFd4RTM?t=24

>be me
>in 5th grade at the time
>everyone's drawing
>i'm sitting next to my crush
>out of the blue, she says i look like a chipmunk
>sad, i go back to drawing a bunny rabbit holding an M16 (it looked very similar to pic related)
>she looks at my drawing and then up at me with a confused face
>teacher sees what i'm drawing
>he whispers to me "user, you can't draw guns in class"
>i erase it
I was lucky... didn't even know anything about Columbine at the time (2008). I've always just liked guns.

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>be middle school me
>quiet, no friends, sits in corner
>I'm okay with that, these kids suck.
>columbine happens
>next day
>called into principals office
>wants me to explain my "alarming behaviors"
>I have no answers, I didn't do anything wrong.
>pre-emptivly expelled from district.
>parents don't know what to do.
>lawyer from church throws shit fit at the district.
>Allowed to continue school in the special ed program.
>every year at April, cops come.
>question me
>follow me
>tell me not to show up on the 15th
>eventually get into high school vocational program.
>get welding degree before my diploma.
>fuck school
>They eventually mail me my diploma.
>cops still kept coming at April.
>left town

I never hurt anyone

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>9th grade, be fat awkward 14 year old with a jewfro
>over the summer, dad buys me a mosin with the money i made mowing lawns
>clean off the cosmoline with white socks and undershirts
>wear them to school because i dont give a shit about anything
>one day, changing clothes for gym class
>a black student notices the brown stains on my socks
>"AYO DIS NIGGA GOT DOODOO ON HIS SOCKS"
>locker room erupts in chimp laughter
>everyone looking
>later, kid i didnt really know comes up to me
>"hey user... why are your socks so dirty?"
>"i-its cosmoline... its from my russian war rifle..."

What questions? Did they say why they were showing up?

A true man of the people you are

>inna 4th grade
>Just moved and want to make friends
>Halfway through the year I have to go to the office
>Can't go alone because medical reasons
>Teacher tells my crush to take me
>Feel like I'm being tard wrangled but ok
>On the way there I try to talk to her
>"So you're mexican user, can you speak Spanish?"
>"no but I know grenada means grenade in russian"
I played too much COD4 with big bro
>She visibly cringes
>Walk in silence
>When I get back she is looking at me every once and a while and then saying something to her friends
>Didn't have any friends yet so I just read a book
>Went home and cried
>Played ssbm, freestyle metalX, ocarina of Time, and battalion wars.

Now thats fucking funny

>be me in High School
>be cunt of a 15 y/o
>always looking for ways to make people I will never even have to interact with on a personal level miserable
>usually boils down to petty arson and vandalism
I probably cause a few tens of thousands of dollars in damage over the course of a single year. It's a fucking miracle I was never caught. I actually do regret my actions, and I look back at my angsty, cringy teenager mentality with great shame. The only reason I can look back and not immediately off myself is because I kept the damages purely to the material and never went after people and their personal belongings.

>simatausly

Any time in your life you're writing with shit, you're probably being a garbage person. If the message, written in shit, is directed towards a menial worker, you're definitely a garbage person.
>be me in 9th grade
>stealing chunks of magnesium and potassium from science labs due to quiet nerd status
>steal weights from school gym
>secretly lifting and making bombs in basement study at home
>there's a big mulleted fuckwit at school
>nickname is Axe
>decide he will be the fall guy
>build grenade with fuse that lasts 10 to 60 seconds
>place in toilets at school, on pile of paper in the bowl of cubicle that people rarely use
>stand outside, relaxed and invisible
>bomb isn't going off
>fuck fuck fuck
>know enough not to go check on that shit, but chance of innocent bystander proximity is rising by the second
>Axe and his fuckwit friends always loiter near toilet block, this is part of the plan
>bomb finally goes off
>joyous relief.jpg
>start chanting AXE AXE AXE AXE
>minions and sheep take up the chance
>pinhead Axe sees the situation, wants to take credit but not responsibility
>walk to library as horseshit ensues
>watch from balcony

>not threatening to shoot said nigger
what a fucking cuck

And what pray tell special ingredient goes into chili? Perhaps something bean-related?

There better be an ending to this user.

Are you me?

>let someone look at my HK catalog for a bit
>teacher sees it and takes it

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You sound like a nigger

Yeah I had one sorta friend that'd always try and lurk around our friend group that was like that. It was pretty widely known amongst my buddies that I was into guns but just that one kid would always interrupt conversations to make some generic school shooter joke. We bullied him pretty good after all that though so it was cash

All of my schools janitors either quit because they were working minimum wage only or were laid off. I always felt bad for those guys

meat

That school sounds cool as fuck

pretty rad, have a (you) and webm of another kommando's rig

Attached: homemade by kommando.webm (960x540, 2.77M)

Holy fuck you’re insane

Dead Kennedy’s lmao

F

Wait so what did you vandalize? Who’s stuff was it? How did you do it?

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I have a billion fucking stories from school because fuck soccer moms. Any single story I have involving a male teacher or professor pales in comparison (unless it involves police, only thing worse than a white woman is a cop)
I must go with the best few in the interest of time.
My first full semester in college, I had an awful Spanish class with some sort of older Ocasio Cortez knock off.
I kept leaving to go the bathroom, and one day I return to find the door to the class locked.
>knock
>wild eyed goblina peers into the hallway "user, you need to stay outside"
>take a seat
>suddenly a fat black cop and a nervous rookie show up to the door with hands on gun butts
>peering into window, don't know its me and I'm behind them
>"g-gentlemen"
>immediately sat down and interrogated by police
>sir are you carrying a concealed weapon
wait what? What the fuck are you on about? Concealed weapon? I'm going to the bathroom
>sir sir you need to calm down! The professor is claiming that you went back to your car to get a gun
why the fuck would she say that? I legit walked back from the restroom and found the door locked. What's going on?
>Sir you appear to be very nervous
Yeah fucking obviously because people being detained are supposed to be calm?

After a short bit the fat black chick looks over to the rook, rolls her eyes and says something to the effect of "I don't think this kid is a problem, I'll grab his stuff and we'll send you on your way if that's cool"
As it turns out the goblina had been getting crazy pissed off at me leaving her class and began shit talking me to the class after I would depart. Finally she made up a fucking crazy story about me going back to my truck to conceal an Uzi (under my fucking T shirt?) or some shit like that. Cops never even asked to search me or my vehicle. However, I never received an apology, and was pretty much forced to drop that class.
1/2

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2/2
Then this last year, I was again called into the school police office. I'm not sure why I didn't refuse and instead either demand a lawyer, but the Captain made it sound as though this would be a friendly thing, and I suppose that's how the badgeniggers get you.
>"Have I reached user?"
Yes Sir
>We received some troubling reports about some material you were accessing in class last week. Do you mind coming down to the office to talk to us?
"Fuck you pig! Get a warrant!" Is what I ought to have yelled, but even then I was naive and thought cops weren't bad people deep down
"Sure"
>end up at station
>cop basically tells me I'm not in trouble either with the law or the school
>"someone saw you with (gif related) and looking at weapons (Jow Forums), then there was a report of two men fighting with swords on there (idk)"
"So why am I here?"
>"Well another police officer stopped you six months ago and found you were carrying a pistol- you were permitted of course. As of right now we're doing a threat assessment"
At this point I took full notice of the younger cop posted at the door and realized if I didn't say the right shit they'd file an ERPO and have a SWAT team at my door before I could make it to my house.
They were deadly serious.
Thankfully it did not go any farther than that. They mostly tried to talk me up, act like they were my friend, try to get me to spill the beans on my political views, suggest we talk about guns, and occasionally try to get me to perjur myself. Basically typical police affair.
At this point real encounters with cops made me hate cops more than Jow Forums ever did. I live in a 97% white upper class neighborhood and make ghetto niggers look like thin blue line bootlickers.

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Cringe, ur class probably thought you two were tards

what a waste of meat and a lack of ethics, off yourself faggot.

OK. Original story time.
> Be 16
> Liberal San Francisco in the late 90's
> Hommies hanging out at my place
> SUPER late at night
> Bored degenerate teenagers
> Decide to walk to the beach, hang out some more there
"Hey user, it's dark out, maybe we should bring some of your knives"
> GREATEST IDEA EVER
> Everyone tools up. Machetes, kukris, ka-bars, fucking anything and everything. I may have been a knife weeb.
> 8-10 of us get strapped, I grab my 4' rattan fighting staff. Donatello was cool, fuck all of you.
> Make our way there, shit was lit, then a while later while we all walking back...
WHOOP WHOOP
> Oh shit, it's the five-oh. Better just stand there like a dear in headlights!
"user, do you know why we stopped you?"
> err, uh... um... no?
"You thought you were being slick, but we saw you hide that beer bottle under your coat. We saw it flash in the headlights as we turned. Have you kids been drinking tonight?
> N-nno officer
"Then will you open your coat?"
> Friend opens coat, reveals sheathed kukri with brass end on the sheath that must have stuck out below his coat.
"HOLY SHIT?!!"
> Both cops jump back, hands goes to their sides
> We gonna die
> Mamma warned me there be days like these
> Cops regain composure, ask if any of the rest of us are armed
> His face when ALL of us nod
> His face when ALL of us are carrying felony length cutlery
> His face when he just rolled up on a bunch of non drinking, non smoking, honor roll kids about to meet San Francisco's juvenile detention system.
Confiscates hundreds of dollars of my sharp-art
> My face when he let's us all off with a warning
> My face when I argue with him to let me keep the staff because it's not illegal and I need it to practice for my high school JROTC drill team, and he lets me keep it.
> My face when my mom never even finds out.
> My face when white privilege was real, that one time.

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>mfw white privilege was real that one time
>implying your dumb ass didn't deserve to get ventilated

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>Be me in highschool
>Weed is the new thing among all my friends/the clique i was in
>Some of them become dealers, all of them smoke weed including me
>After about 4 months i decide i'll try being a dealer, nothing serious, just selling to friends and junior high
>Don't want to owe debts to a supplier i didn't know from the college
>Genius idea, buy clones. I'm in horticulture, i know a little bit about plants, i have the materials to grow them
>Holy fuck was growing these things the single most stressful thing in my life
>One day they bud, all 5 plants
>Fuck. Ya.
>I've sold before, but, only the stuff i didn't end up smoking to friends, so i have very little experience
>Decide to try it, net $50 off my first day (plant yielded 6 grams)
>Next day, i decide to carry my dad's gun, nothing special, no value price or sentiment wise. just a cheapo revolver with missing grips.
>Pick related, except rustier and no grips
>1 gram left, my friend wants to buy it. i trek to his house with a huge pit in my stomach.
>I'm crossing the playground at 5pm
>Winter so it's dark
>See two men on the other side of playground parking lot, parallel to me
>Weird but fine
>As i'm nearing the exit they start making a b-line to me diagonally
>Oh fuck, police
>Wrong
>I face my back to the exit, and tie my shoes as an excuse to see if they'll go pass me or not
>See these are not police at all
>Not acting like they're on meth, but look like they've done it
>Skinny Pete from Breaking Bad and a half black/half Mexican man come up to me
>I (thankfully) finish tying my shoe and stand up
>Half&half pulls out this gross looking knife, skinny pete: a club of some sort. I take a step back and put my hands up.
>They ask what I have on me, they take a step forward, me, a step back
>I am visibly distressed, my hands are shaking a lot, and i'm stuttering with every word i say
>"I-i-h-h-i-i-ha-have w-weed a-a-and m-wallet
>They seem amused

cont.

Attached: us-rev-right.jpg (375x281, 9K)

>They ask me to get it, they step forward, i step back.
>I reach in my left side inside jacket pocket where the weed is
>also the gun
>they shuffle forward, I step back, maintaining a 3 ft distance
>still shaking badly, takes what felt like 10 minutes to get a decent grip on the gun
>As soon as I do, I take a step back lean forward and shoot 2-3 times at half&hald
>drops his knife, and grabs at his chests, turns around to run, trips, starts stumbling away
>Skinny Pete already 10 ft away booking it
>Shoot once or twice at him
>I put the gun in my pants pocket and turn around and run
>Thank. Fucking. God. There was no traffic.
>I run about a mile away, and from there start walking, decide to go to friends house
>Still shaking a lot
>To combat my adrenaline rush I breathe in quickly through my mouth and closed my lips so it made a "whip" noise
>Make it to friends house
>Just give him the weed for free
>I take a hit
>After about 3 hours have him drive me home
>Go home, take shower, say goodnight to parents who ask what's wrong. "N-nothing, I'm just tired"
>Put gun in shoe, put the pair of shoes under the bed
>Don't get any sleep,swearing the police are going to raid my house
>They don't
>Next day, after about an hour and a half of sleep
>Shower, dress, put gun in pocket
>Go outside and plant the semi-dwarf apple tree my dad has been telling me to plant the past 3 days.
>Dig hole, drop gun, bury gun, drop plant, fill in hole
>Stay home for the rest of the week (winter break)
>Go to school, swear I'll get busted here
>I don't
>Never hear anything about it, no news or gossip, nothing
>After about 2 months all the stress with have gone.
>A year later it hardly crosses my mind

And now I'm here. I don't feel bad about it at all. They deserved it. I was a degenerate back then, and I would have deserved all the punishment that I should have gotten, but it never came. Since then I've moved, and the only feeling I get from thinking about this is how lucky I am.

Based retard

Implying my dumbass did

Neat, that's the kind of setup I want to make next. I've got most of it planned out, just too busy.

>cops should shoot people for carrying concealed weapons
neck yourself