So boys. My best friend was in a relationship with a physically and psychologically abusive silverback gorrilla. During a short breakup, she slept with me. They recently brokeup for what looks like the final time, and dudebro found out about me sleeping with his girl.
Whats the best EDC to fend off against a meat slab that I cant be arrested for? Ausfag for law context.
Your hands.
Enjoy your AIDS.
They can't arrest you if there isn't a body.
In all seriousness, buy some pepper spray from WA, or use a heavy metal bat.
NSW pepper spray is illegal. Sorry I should have been more specific.
Any good alternatives to get the same effect?
You playing for keeps or fending him off? Is he likley to report you to the police or stay quiet? Rural or urban setting? If all else fales just keep a cricket bat or some shit in your car
Urban fend off. Want to join the cops later in life so I need to do a no kills run.
P.S: unlikely to report, but if I get randomly searched for whatever reason I cant get arrested for it.
You messed up by banging your best friend's ex girlfriend. If he decides you deserve an assbeating for that, then take it.
what is reading comprehension
Buy a time machine
>believing OP's shit
Wew lad
Is wasp spray and pipes illegal there?
>buy wasp spray
>buy a length of pipe
>gorilla comes
>spray in the face and beat him with the pipe
Bonus points.
>fuck her again and send him the video, make her come A LOT
This, go buy some carburetor cleaner or something.
The fuck cunt what about this seems fake to you?
Wasp spray is good but I need a passable alternative to the pipe, if im in my work uniform ill just use my hammer since I have justifiable cause for carrying that, but so far my best option for a weapon is a thunderbolt, lock in a sock, keychain with a weight etc. Issue with the chain weapon is its hard to use, im fucked if he gets in close and grapples me.
Are you older than 18? Get the fuck out.
nothing. you deserve an asskicking.
Just imagine being so autistic you think someone can "just leave a relationship" when they threaten to fucking kill you if you leave.
Yes I am so shut the fuck up tool.
Conceal carry an emu, cunt
Mate thats a fucking WMD, I conceal carry a weapon like that and ill get instant 6 stars.
You're a garbage human being and you deserve an asskicking. That or just admit to how much of a pussy backstabbing faglord you are and try to weasle and beg your way out of it. Also do that fag a favor and never talk to him again, he deserves better.
MY BEST FRIEND WAS THE ONE GETTING ABUSED YOU DYSLEXIC RETARD. jesus fucking christ what the fuck is reading comprehension?
>Ausfag for law context.
Say your sorry and admit your guilt to your friend, unless your talking about your friends ex- then RUN FOREST RUN OR Call the police.
>Best Friend
>Sleeps with ex after recent break up, even though she's an abusive she-demon
Gee user, what a great buddy you are, I wish you were my friend.
>NSW pepper spray is illegal
What the fuck dude
Mate no, my best friend was the victim of the abuse.
My police force is cucked. If someone breaks into your house, and you grab a kitchen knife to defend your property, YOU get incriminated
You guys are massive, big black cock eating faggots who should learn how to read. This is fucking, I just cannot believe it kek.
The girl was OPs friend. The girl was getting abused by Steroid McMeathead. OP banged the girl when Steroid and girl were not dating each other. Steroid got angry.
Fucking brainlets, you should be in school you underage niggers.
Welcome to the future liberals want for America.
You slept with a silverback gorrilla? Whatever floats your boat I guess.
if you get arrested where are they going to send you. you already live in a prison colony.
Fair enough mate, my apologies. Hopefully you fucked some sense into her, considering she has bad judgement in choosing an abusive dickhead as a partner.
You're pretty screwed when it comes to self defence. What State/Territory?
Your friend got abused, so you fucked his bitch? Kek, what a cherry on top, oh and as for your question, don't live in Aussie if self-defense is something you're interested in
>Australia annexes New Zealand to serve as prison colony
You are a piece of shit, and so are all the pathetic guys girls are willing to fuck during a short breakup to feel better about themselves, I hope bro kicks your wimpy ass
You fucked a nigger lover? Disgusting, enjoy your AIDS retard. I hope all 3 of you end up dead.
Update: best friend called cops of silverback for threatening me.
>cops of silverback
The nignog has his own police force now? Doesn't sound good for you, chap.
*on
You fucking faggot its a typo
Update us when this results in nignog subdued by force
>getting pity-fucks from Chad Thundercock's used goods
>living in a shithole that doesn't allow you to defend yourself
Nah you're fucked in more ways than one, matey
Give me an image so you know at first glance the post is related.
Press F
OP's sentence structure gives no clues as to what the gender of the friend is. Also since this is Jow Forums, people are more likely to believe your friend is male and not female. You also seem to be implying that women aren't able to be physically and mentally abusive.
all it takes is a functioning brain stem it really isnt that fucking hard
A silverback is an old, male Gorilla.
Pepper spray is illegal, but lock in a sock isnt?
>he fucked a nigger
Disgusting, I hope you kill each other.
It reads to me more like his best friend was fucking a sheboon and then he fucked the dinduisha during a breakup. Only complete losers are "best friends" with a woman they aren't fucking. Then again only losers engage in bestiality too I suppose but at least that would mean he has a base level of masculinity. My bad for assuming that. Why is this on Jow Forums?
what it like being an angry virgin?
can you please go on?
OP can you conscript some emus for a small army?
but seriously, i would carry something if you are fearing for your life. better to be judged by 12 then carried by 6.
also possibly a restraining order? you have proof in the text.
might be the best way to keep him away if he fucks up and you cant put him in the ground
a silverback is a nigger, we also call them north american pavement apes
What is it like being a faggot?
its pretty gay
me on the right
Jow Forums rarely achieves consensus on anything, but one of those rare things Jow Forums can agree on is that women who allow themselves to be abused are always more trouble than they're worth. Riddle yourself this, how did the dude find out? Your "best friend" clearly didn't care enough to avoid putting your life at risk. Forget about EDC, just dump her and find someone who isn't using you for whatever games she is playing.
This and only this
>who allow themselves to be abused
or those who are abusive themselves.
>faggoty fucking niceguy orbiter who "would treat her better than the assholes she dates"
>uses her getting slapped around as a vector for a pityfuck
>now wants to avoid the rightful consequences of his underhand opportunistic behaviour
Fucking typical, you deserve it you snake.