FEMA Open Up!

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*not open door*

I love when the cops stomp out people like this. Gives me the warm and fuzzies all over.

r/politics is that way, this is not a bootlicker board.

cops are the front line in gun control.
I chuckle when they get smoked doing unconstitutional shit.

You mean r/OrangeManBad Board? Only retards and chinks use reddit for politics.

FUCK OFF WERE FULL

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The grimace on his face is what really sells this image.

"Thank God you're here! Send me down some tp, and a fresh pocket pussy"

That's because it's skim milk.

Start sniping from 500 meters away while they tug on a fake door embedded in a concrete block. Take their shit.

Acronyms aren't welcome here, friendo.

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And go to federal prison for life about a 6 months after doing that?

Observe them from my real bunker ten feet to the left of that one.

>opens door
>cannon with lit fuse
Your move lawman

But how, it’s all reloaded ammo with cop fingerprints on the casings from picking up at the range. Think, nigger.

No, they kill you for that, like they were likely planning on doing in the first place

Yea, like all those homicides in katrina that totally got solved, right?

60,000 volts to the door handle which triggers a 1-acre electrified rebar grid inches beneath the grass.

nah senpai

it's . s.o.y.m.i.l.k

Are you the Pizza Man?
If not slam the door on his face.

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>s.o.y.m.i.l.k
Haha.

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NO FEMA DON'T GO IN THERE! THAT'S ANTMAN'S STORM SHELTER! YOU DO NOT KNOW WHAT HELL YOU WILL UNLEASH OM THIS EARTH IF YOU OPEN THAT DOOR!

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Kek these vids are always hilarious

Yell 'nobody is home' and watch them leave in confusion

hit the detonators

>m.i.l.k
haha

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Turn on the sprinklers that spray mixed Lofentanil-Moroidin-DMSO. Then the lazers take over.

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>Jow Forums gets visited by FEMA
>finds door
>they took the bait
>empty stockpile
>they didn't find the secret entrance behind row 7, 2nd shelf
>autism saves the day

>Turn on the sprinklers

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That's for the antifa rally

Be in my actual bunker while the Feds are busy raiding a decoy

idk why but this thread is absolutely the funniest thing i've seen all day

Stuff like that always make me chuckle. The video I remember had the guy begging to talk to the cops supervisor and the cop just laughed and said NOPE as he put his knee in the back of the guys neck to control his autism after the cop tossed his ass out of the car.

suddenly my boner feels dutybound.

TF2 comics out of context... this is why I come to Jow Forums

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>they go into fake stockpile
>door closes behind them
>chamber fills with sleeping gas
>they wake up chained up and in gimp suits
Welcome to my Jow Forumshamber fuckbois!

There are 30 000m2 of tunnels down here filled with mines and hidden traps.

Come find me.

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>I do not acknowledge your authority!
>*unlocks baton*
>You're about to acknowledge my authority motherfucker.

So that’s where the word farting comes from.

Wow we got ourselves a real badass over here.

MY NAME IS user NOT FEMA!

>I ordered a PIZZA, not a FAGGOT

"The niggers are in coontown. Get off of my property."

Open door,get on floor.
Everybody walk the dinosaur.

>imagine being afraid of an agency that is not LE and has no intention of acting like LE
>imagine being afraid of an agency that's sole purpose is to help prepare and mitigate for, respond to, and recover from disasters of any kind that are large enough to have been declared a national emergency.
>fearing that old man with gray hair, no gun, and ll bean boots
so sad

But what if it's the ATF pretending to be FEMA?

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Because if you're actually in a nationally declared emergency, I highly doubt that the ATF has the intentions or resources to care about what guns you may or may not own unless you've made threats or have proven yourself to be a serious threat. Perhaps when you idiots start taking pot shots at people 300 meters out when you're playing out your SHTF fantasy when really they're just trying to get their stuff after a hurricane or tornado, then yeah, maybe it would be the ATF but they'd probably just no-knock raid you rather than claim to be FEMA.

pretty sure there are FEMA agents who are deputized and carry firearms
Hell, there are HHS agents who carry guns

Actually, ignore that. I'm ATF and suck nigger dicks.

>FEMA agents
They're not agents and they're not LE, at all. FEMA only responds to national emergencies declared by the president. They actually don't have authority over the local jurisdiction. You may see DHS agents however. Just because FEMA is part of the DHS doesn't make them FEMA agents.

"You are currently trespassing on restricted private property. Leave now, or you will be considered a threat and escalating force measures will be used to remove you."
Arm claymores

>imagine spending life in jail because some well intentioned aid workers just wanted to make sure you weren't in need of assistance

>going to jail because you told someone they were trespassing when they were trespassing
but why
>well intentioned aid workers
the idea with a bunker/shelter is to put all the aid you need inside, then seal it when the situation dictates, only to unseal it later when you've discerned an all clear. opening the bunker when someone knocks on the door defeats the whole purpose, and in any situation in which a bunker is useful constitutes a really bad idea, unless you're making a conscious decision to permanently abandon the bunker as a bunker.

if there's a hurricane nearby and a FEMA worker walks up to my normal house to ask if I'm OK, obviously the response differs a bit.

>so sad
the entire FEMA camp conspiracy was born from a video game

Kek

Come on in.

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I'm not giving FEMA a pass on Katrina. But the organization got fucked when they were rolled into DHS rather than being their stand alone agency who answered directly to the President. They suddenly had tons of layers and secretaries to answer to and fewer resources since everything within DHS was geared towards stopping and responding to terrorism.

>spray them with a painful poison
>and the strongest opiates

What.

>*detonate the fake bunker

Fuck you FEMA you won't take me alive

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You're about to be an injured party if you dont step out of the car, mate.

it's a decoy bunker because lol if that's your obvious real bunker so they can cut the door as much as they want

The only way I see a trap like that going off without being noticed beforehand ("wtf this door suddenly grabs when it's partly open") is if they're in full-on doorkicker breach, bang, and, clear mode. Grenade pins take a fair amount of effort to remove.

I keep seeing his and still don't know what's going on.

what is it you don't understand?

source for this?
I need to see the full video this shit is hilarious

No one's afraid of FEMA.
But we ARE afraid of the ATF, who will kill women and children just because you and your family and friends are white.

atf is a shit but imagine beleiving this storm fags race baiting

>he doesn't spray his grenade pins with wd40
you're not gonna make it

Why it doesn't put out the fire despite practically smoothering the small flame but doesn't imediately explode in flames if it is that flammable.

Do you also love when you taste their boot on your tongue and their cock in your mouth you fucking fag?

>be white
>be anywhere right of Bill Clinton
>ATF kills you and everyone you know by any means necessary
>gets the media to cover it up for them
I see we've learned nothing from Waco and Ruby Ridge and Bundy Ranch.

thats a warcrime

Fema can’t do shit. They aren’t law enforcement and rely on private rent a cop security for their buildings. The fema security managers don’t even carry guns. They rely on mall cops, local law enforcement and possibly federal protective services. They are bottom of the barrel fed employees who push papers and spend 75% of their “work” day talking on the phone and smoking cigarettes.

> t. Fed rent a cop

why wouldn't this work?

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lo siento, no hay nadie en casa.

>trap them all inside
>detonate explosives

The foam is not reacting with the flame, it's reacting with the hot wax over time.

Your entire premise is flawed. The door doesn't keep you out; it keeps me in.

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underrated

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>Who?
>What?

>Dave's not here.

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>send patrol to some dude's house
>they dont come back
>send backup
>reported shots fired
Do you think real life is skyrim and people lack object permanence? Are you retarded?

LOL WTF? MILK JUGS OF PAIN

>Open up!
When I was a child my mother was strict with me and set very high standards for my school performance. I always did the best I could and was a straight A student, but did not recieve much in the way of recognition for my achievements. It was simply expected of me. Conversely, my younger brother responded to this strictness by acting out, but when he did perform well in school he was rewarded with attention, toys, and money. The unfairness of this treatment led feelings of resentment, but I bottled them up and continued to achieve high marks in school because it was something I valued for my own sake. The feelings of resentment lingered though and I believe ultimately contributed to my weakness for substance abuse in my current life.

FEMA agent: "Perhaps I should clarify my statement..."

Drug dependence is best fetish

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But that's what happened at Ruby Ridge and Waco.