Remove squawk

>will a pellet gun kill birb
Seriously?
Of course they won’t
Bird have that avian bone structure. Light and strong like Kevlar composite.
Just use a 22 + homemade silencer. ATF won’t fuck with you if you just keep it on your property.

>Its 3am. Knock knock knock

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I have those too. They love to locate the loudest piece of metal. But at least they don't drop shit absolutely everywhere and hold up traffic. They do a few salvos and fuck off. Their singing is a lot better than hearing
>HONK HONK-HONK
from 14 of the shit machines for an hour straight.

Here we have honk for only 2-3 months, and they have learned to fear me. Squawk is year round and doesn't give a fuck.

My dad once said to use dry rice. The greedy fuckers will eat as much as they can, and hopefully that dry rice will rehydrate and expand in their full stomachs.
*Pop* goes the seagull.

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Retard. Air rifles are common for hunting pigeons and crows.

They're protected under the Migratory Birds Act and don't have a season. $5000 fine iirc. All you can really do is put up netting on your stuff or get a dog to chase them off. If you have a HOA or something I guess you could complain to them about your neighbor being a fag.

t. ATF

I fucking HATE seagulls with every part of my body and soul.

Work at a power plant, and for whatever reason we have flocks of thousands of them. They will sit on your car the whole fucking day shitting like crazy. Try to dive bomb you and shit on your head. They are so fucking stupid they make nests right on the train tracks, and when their eggs get smashed they just make a new nest the next day. They fight eachother and kill eachothers babies.

We have tried everything. Wavy arms man like at a car dealership. They just laugh at it. Propane cannon to scare them. They leave for like 10 seconds and come back, and that only worked for like 3 days. Put nails and razor wire on every possible flat surface. They stand right on the shit.

My only joy is when the semi trucks come through the plant they just drive right through huge flocks of them and you hear pop-pop-pop and see feathers flying. And then the ones that survive start eating the dead ones.

We got a guy whose full time job is to go around picking up dead seagulls. I bet he has PTSD by now for sure.

Yeah, no.
Pellet gun. Clean, takes care of it. Just dont get caught.

Dont listen to these retards voting for poison. They fly off and die, it poisons the eco system around them. They die nearby, a cat or dog is gunna eat the carcass and die.

I read it as dry ice initially and the images in my head were glorious. Shit gulls flying away and just bursting in mid air.

Break up alka seltzer tablets and have them eat it.

I don't think this will work. They will either cook the rice first or not eat it. Plus I have tried it and it just makes me burp a little.

Same problems as

Sauce

Very skeptical of pellet guns. Accidentally shot my friend when we were kids and no real damage.

ATF WOODPECKERS!?

Not talking so much the shit ones at Walmart. More suggesting getting a hold of something with a bit more power behind it. There are pellet guns out there that'll kill a Raccoon.

Birds cant burp user.

call police its illegal to feed wildlife...leave the fucking birds along asshole

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You don't want a .177cal Red Ryder but if you get a decent PCP gun in .22cal or .25cal it will definitely take out a coon, seagull, etc.

Hell, they make big bore PCP guns in .357-.50cal that people use for hunting bigger game.

Don't know about seagulls but I've used air rifles to kill pigeons that we're shitting all over my car with great success

The seagulls will cook the rice? lmao wtf are you on about?

WAAAAH DADDY GOVERNMENT HELP ME WAAAAAH

Life isn't a classroom just telling the teacher doesn't work.

Put alchoselzer in bread and feed
It to them. Their stomachs cant handle the pressure and POP. This kid at my school did this back in the day and the seagulls head flew about 30 feet from its body. Pretty impressive. Maybe hide the loaded bread next to your neighbors house at night to lower suspicion on yourself.

Is Jow Forums really this fucking retarded? I thought people were trolling me but I guess not. If I kill the seagulls more will just show up, you dumb niggers. I need the problem solved permanently.

Figure it out yourself then you fucking retard.

I want to know how the fucking seagulls are going to cook the rice a little bit lmao

A toy BB gun is not an air rifle.

woodpecker a cute, goose not a cute

Move away then you dumb nigger

Are you a fucking moron? Of course they will, faggot
>compares shooting a human to a fucking oversized pigeon
Dont reproduce.

>tfw no mutt GF

I want to cum inside Brittany Venti

>We got a guy whose full time job is to go around picking up dead seagulls. I bet he has PTSD by now for sure.
Fucking kek how much does he make?
t.unemployed and already fucked in the head

Alka-seltzer

Supressed 22 with HP

Rice is poisonous to birds

ok I hope someone shoots or poisons you when your hungry! Fuck Face!

Your to scared to confront your neighbors because of your extra high (S)0y content--- can only attack a little bird to take out his frustrations. And why are you worried about getting shitted on by birds, you mom does your laundry!

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LOL not sure, he's with the company we contract to do all the other cleaning/custodial work around the plant. Probably not much above min wage.

wrist rocket

Obviously you're a stupid cuck who thinks it's not the seagulls that are the problem, but the neighbors. You're just too much of a stupid beta to admit it.

to start with, begin complaining to your HOA. If you don't have an HOA, then you begin talking to your local township. also, don't open with how you're angry at the mess the birds make. that's just whining and nobody likes a whiner. rather focus your complaints towards how the seagulls are being taught to rely on the humans for food rather than finding it on their own. this kind of ecological impact is the kind of thing busybody widows just love to bitch about, and they'll make great champions if you sell it properly (good luck with that). be sure to note the abnormal population growth caused by the neighbors providing the food and don't forget to bullshit the potential ecological fallout from this growth. If all goes well, you should have them getting fined within a few weeks if there's an ordinance against the practice and a few months if there isn't.

if that all fails, resort to the rice and alka seltzer while saving up for a bird of prey. the bird of prey can happily eat the seagulls. also, don't forget the exotic pet license. /AN/ should be a good board for advice concerning such things.
Honestly, it's the board you should have gone to first anyways.

I'd rather hear knock knock knock than HONK HONK HONK or have my property coated in seagull shit.

>if you kill your enemies they win

Kill shit birds by feeding them alka seltzer

"rescue" some cats from a shelter and let them become your outdoor cat pets.

a good cat is a dead cat

OP, treat the problem, not the symptom. shoot the neighbor.

My friend lives on a boat and hates these fuckers. He shot one in the head with a rather powerful BB gun from his boat. Thing was instakilled of course, collapsed right there on the dock. His neighbors freaked out and thought someone had shot it with a 22, but had no idea where it had been shot from. They gossipped about it for a while but didn't even bother to pick up the corpse. The seagulls did seem to avoid my friend's boat after that, suggesting that they are smarter at least than his neighbors.

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She's a stupid alt-right bitch.
You're honestly better not knowing otherwise you'll fall into a rabbit hole full of incels and alt-righters

>id use one of these

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this

rent free

They aren't cheap, but the Koreans make a pcp airgun designed to fire bird shot, they will definitely take down a seagull at close range. They aren't firearms, but a layman won't know the difference and they are loud enough to draw attention so it might get the cops called on you. Seconding don't use poison, you will just end up killing other birds, pets, and livestock.
pic related

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Fuck off Konstantine

Nooo sonny.
These fuckers hammer on metal roofs over and over again because they never learn.

Call the town and tell them your neighbor is feeding wild life. Most states have ordinances against feeding animals or destroying their habitual tendencies and making them reliant on humans.

>Lace food with poison. EZ.
You'll kill someone's dog or other pet like this. It's a fucking RETARDED idea and you'll probably get arrested.

>My asshole neighbors keep feeding seagulls and these fuckers are shitting everywhere and obnoxious as fuck.
>How should I best dispose of them?
>If I kill the seagulls more will just show up, you dumb niggers

Oh shit nigger, we all thought you were referring to the seagulls. If you meant your neighbors, you should kill them in their sleep with a hammer. Obviously. But in some places that could be considered murder and can come with a small fine if they catch you.

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bb gun works fine

Kill the neighbors, then.

Daisy rifles are like 40 dollars

slingshot.

The event in ops pic happened to me while eating a peanutbutter and strawberry jelly sandwich in jones beach on long island

Does the pop rocks and bread crumbs thing work?

Hire pic related guy.
Fucking guaranted results, but it can be pretty expensive.

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Tell them to fucking stop you beta.

get a drone and have some fun faggot...

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Choke that fucker out like you would with a honk.
Alternatively you could lure the flying Jew with bread then pepper spray the little shit in the face and proceed to punt that fucker across the street

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I feel your pain user, i want too

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how did you get a picture of my dick?

Nuthin a 10ga can't solve

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I heard that ducks can't burp so they internally explode when fed yeast. Don't know if the same goes for all birds or just ducks, but I'd give it a try.

Dogs are mammals and as such can burp, so there's little to no danger to the neighbor's pets.

M8 there's pellet guns powerful enough to take medium sized game animals.

>pepper spray the little shit in the face
birds do not have a capsaicinoid receptor and as such do not perceive heat from capsicum

That's a myth, rice isn't dangerous to birds at all

Why is your dick a cobra chicken?

>Don't do this unless you want to poison the fish or aquatic mammals

If you fish like me, if erry harbor seal died tomorrow I would be happy.

This is a honk thread not a hammered shark thread

Why isn't yours?

Plus three alka-seltzer . just toss a couple crackers. Get a flock. Swap to alka-seltzer. Repeat ad nauseam. Profit

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