Lets get an innawoods stories thread going

>lets get an innawoods stories thread going
Pic for attention

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>be me
>hiking inawoods with funs with my cousins mid summer.
>we come to a clearing, on the edge of a big pasture which was a cow farm.
>one of my cousins has an idea to look for cow patty shrooms.
> duck under the barbed wire and find some nice mushrooms growing out of a giant cow shit.
>each of us eats a mushroom
> continue on our way hiking innawoods
>30 min later we are all pale and sweating, tripping fucking balls.
>one cousin mag dumps his AR into a tree stump because he thought it was full of rabid chipmunks.
>he runs out of ammo then starts sprinting back to through the Forrest. all the rest of us start shooting at anything that was moving.
>ran out of ammo
>laid on the ground until the trip wore off.
> found other cousin 3 hours later laying in a creek bed jerking off

i call bullshit

explain what kind of mushrooms these are

>live next to large forest
>decide to explore an area I have not been to in 15 years
>hike through brush, up cliffside
>notice something blue sticking out of the ground at the highest point
>it's a machete that's been missing, handle is blue and has been chewed on and left there
As far as I can figure, right before my old dog died her blind and deaf ass stole my machete, wandered up there, chewed on the handle and left it.

if user is in pacific NW or is a poo-in-loo, this is actually plausible

>shooting steel on my family ranch in Texas hill country
>decide to walk to the creek at the back of the property to look for hogs
>grass has grown tall from all the rain
>hear a mountain lion moaning through the other side of a barbed wire fence and some dense trees
>walk back to my truck and drive home

Missed out on some quality cougar poon there bud

this makes me really sad

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No need. I miss her, but she lived a good, long life. It's so perplexing that she would do that though, it was in a really obscure area that I just happened to climb up to. I'm happy I found it.

I have a neat mountain lion story
>be me
>Camping with friends on own property
>stay up all night because the assholes dont clean their shit and theres food scraps
>Have shitty pump action 223 rifle
>friends all sitting around campfire. One asleep snoring.
>as hes snoring we hear footfalls.
>They're using his snores to mask its movement
>as soon as I realize this we hear a low purr/growl from a few feet away.
>go full wtf mode and strap a flashlight to my rifle painting the treeline.
>See movement through the trees a few times but nothing much happens.
>sun rises and we find big cat tracks feet away from us next to friends car.
>promptly pack and leave
I now bitch out anyone who doesnt put their food away when I camp

>hiking Appalachian trail alone
>bring penis pump with me
>use it everyday like usual
>pump too hard one night and it gets stuck
>try everything I can but it wont get unstuck
>have to finish hike with penis pump still firmly attached to my dick
>eventually have to get a helicopter to come pick me up because my dick started turning blue

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What’s terrifying is that most people will never see a mountain lion, even people who spend tons of time in the woods, however the odds are every person that spends time in the woods has probably been watched by a mountain lion.

>go innawoods
>shoot targets
>trees tell me how to shoot better
>shoot better
Thank you trees

this might be an /out/ qusetion, but how would you put food "away" when camping in backcountry

Rope over a branch.

did they tell you in vietnamese?

What did he mean by this?

Based

I ripped a squatter's trailer apart with two pickups and pushed the halves into the Potomac once.

>middle of the night, sleeping in tent alone
>I'm in a field, with a forest 40-50 yards away
>hear movement, it wakes me up
>sounds like something big, branches are snapping
>unzip tent, shine flashlight
>fucking nothing
>attempt to go back to sleep
>hear more movement
>sounds like it's either bi-pedal, or moving very slowly
>the sounds transition from twigs/branches snapping to grass crunching
>it is now in my field
>ohfuckohshitWTF
>Jow Forumsube save me
>put on electronic earpro, step out of tent
>point AR-15 straight down, fire three rounds
>loud and bright as fuck
>hear distinct sound of whatever the hell that was start running away

guns are an excellent deterrent. I swear it sounded like a human though. I've heard deer and elk moving and it did NOT sound like that.

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>he doesn't get his shooting advice from trees
fucking nogunz gtfo

We had cars so that's what we shouldve locked them in. If you've backpacked you should either bury them in an airtight container or like the other user said. Rope over a tree branch. Suspend it in the air so nothing can get to it. No matter what if you cooked the scent will attract scavengers. I figured itd just be coyotes but I was wrong apparently

When I was a kid my grandparents would take us camping in Inyo / Mono counties. Beautiful mountains with ancient bristlecone pines, crystal streams of cold water, and mountain pine air. Night always freaked me out though, as it seems to do to all kids. One night the sound of sniffing/snuffing woke me up and it went on for what seemed to be hours. I imagined it was a huge fat man (which was rare back then) because it was so loud. It never bothered us in the tents though. I am pretty sure it was a bear thinking back to it.

/x/ Diagnoses you with a Wendigo encounter

Can this also be a place for innawoods gear questions?

>be me
>camping around in some haunted woods or some shit, locals say cultists are in and around there
>shitty AR will keep me safe
>night time, full moon so I can see
>camping on the edge of a tree clearing with brush about waist high obscuring my campsite
>decide to stand up and observe my surroundings
>100 yds away see a bunch of deer grazing on the other edge of the clearing
>moonlight splashes against their fur, very aesthetically pleasing
>feels good man

This. This sounds like a Yacolt thing to do.

về nhà GI

Ive got one. Bumping to keep thread alive until i get home

Based.

I ask because im going innawoods tomorrow. I was hoping someone had come up with an easier method over rope-in-tree

The balls on this kid

MOUNTAIN MOMMA

I'm from the Southeast. People (mostly broke teens) search cowpatties for shrooms here as well.

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>be me
>innawoods on DNR land in WA
>go down side road off of a logging road, looking for a spot to shoot
>find a clearing, backstop is shitty, so I probably shouldn't shoot there
>notice a trail leading into the woods
>follow it for about a quarter mile
>find a kick ass shelter
>fallen logs as walls, dugout floor, 3 or 4 big tarps for the roof
>there's plastic Day of the Dead skulls hanging from the ceiling and the trees around it
>nobody's there, but I can smell something rotting
>tried to find it again a couple months later, and someone had bulldozed the logging road and completely cut it off

yes give us your regional data so we can run it through our Aipac, Southern poverty law center computer google alogarythms