*bumps into you*

*you crouch down as she approaches your hiding spot. excitement and anticipation are the best aphrodisiac, and you were always one horny SOB. you peak at a glance at the approaching girl and notice her comely face, slender and long figure. *

*you can feel your erection growing with each throbbing heartbeat, and its straining so hard against your zippers that you release the kraken right there. your erection touches the cold, damp ground and you pound the pavement with it a few times. a little pain before the fun, always made things more exciting.*

*she is quickly approaching close to where you are hiding, and soon she walks right past you without noticing anything, her face staring at her shoes as she travels with her hands in her coat pockets.*

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My constant state of hyper-awareness makes me immune to pickpocketing.

grab the bitch by the hair

More when?

*tensing, you anticipate for the perfect moment. the girl doesnt even bother to look anywhere but at the ground, so you easily reach out and grab her by her long, white hair with an angry fistful. a shocked gasp escapes the pretty girl, but quickly after her face contorts with anger. you question your decision for a split moment when suddenly the girl you were just holding by the hair vanishes into thin air, leaving only a flashing green silhouette where she was once standing. oh fuck, you realized you probably shouldnt have done that right before a cold sword grows out from the back of your throat and out of your mouth. you stand there in agony and unable to scream for what seems like a brief lifetime. mercifully, the girl swings her sword and decapitates your skull from the mouth up. you see a tumbling vision of the cold city and the sky, and its the last thing that you see before all fades to darkness.*

i shit my pants then die

It was just my hologram that died not me so i put the antimagic lasso around her then lift up skirt

Is there a reason she can teleport out of attacks but we can't?

Respawn in clone chamber. Get swole restart the search for this theif now murderer.

*you die headless, blood splurting from your neck and your head a few feet from your body. the mysterious girl glances at your body and noticed your erection, still miraciously hard and upright even in death. suddenly she longs for home and steps quickly into the alley, into the night. the rain continues to pour upon your decapitated head and body, raindrops splattering around your erection.*

A voice can be heard from a few feet behind. "Your next line is: 'Rest in peace, you degenerate fuck!' Am I right?!"

Out of nowhere, a fucking barrage of bullets rip through the girl's figure before she can respond, tearing pieces of flesh from her bit by bit, blood and pieces of bone staining the ground.

teleport behind her and unsheathe my epic japanese katana (samurai ninja sword) and slice her in half so fast nobody can see my hand move and tip my fedora and walk away with my big leather trenchcoat in the wind

actually yes, its one of her abilities. she can teleport behind enemies and teleport short distances. at full energy she unleashes her teleport attack, teleporting behind and striking up to 3 enemies with an often fatal attack in an instant.

You obviously know nothing of erections except for
>rubbing it makes it hard hihihihuhuhuhhuhuhuhehehehe

>remember I don't have a wallet and none of my pencils are missing
>feel a wave of relief
>fap to the memory of touching a woman

...Owo, huehuehue you got me.

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good thing I carry two wallets
one for keys and one for money/which is always balls deep in my front pocket

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How is that fair? What's our special ability? Why is the gamemaster allowing us to die so easily? How is the story supposed to continue if we're wiped out? Do we roll a new character and play as them? Then why would we be invested in the first character? Who gives a shit about this theif bitch?

the real me appears in front of her, katana in hand, a fedora on my head and my trenchcoat swaying with the wind
*tips fedora* "That was just a decoy m'lady. Looks like you made me use ten percent of my power, but now I'll have to go all out"

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i wasnt trying to DM. Ciri does have these abilities i see youve not yet played the witcher 3.

>fiction
>it doesnt matter

Witcher? I thought this was from cyberpunk?

she will be in both games. same ciri, she can travel worlds you would know this if you played witcher.

i hope shes the main character.

doesn't matter, this bitch messed with the wrong ninja warrior

I promptly teleport behind her and slice the thief in half. She looks down in horror as the upper half of her body slowly slides down her lower half before it falls on the ground.

"I'm sorry master, I had to go all out, just this once" I say, before I grab my wallet and walk away, the rain pouring on me. Her bisected body lays in the alley, her upper half still conscious but losing blood fast. She tries to crawl towards me as I walk away, but all she can do is let out a REEEEE.

I stop for a moment and tip my fedora once again, uttering the final words she hears, "nothing personnel kid"

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another of her abilities is vanishing instantly before a mortal blow strikes her.

you can see why she is wifu'd.

Fucking love how this thread turned out

What the fuuuuuuuck. Why is she allowed to be in fantasy and sci-fi at the same time?

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Always check your purse and stuff if someone bumps into you. Also keep everything in front pockets. Also be careful around gypsies.