What are the most pathetic things you do/have done to numb your loneliness? I bet you can't top this

>tfw both you and your gf met through omegle

5 years later and we have moved in together after crossing borders to be with one another. Never give up hope user

Lay in bed and fantasize on hours end about my aspirations actually coming true and becoming someone successful and admired by people, a lot of times I will listen to music and put myself in as one of the band members and picture myself living that life and having that type of success and talent.

>go to as many different stores as possible in as many trips as possible so I can interact with as many cashiers as possible
That sounds like an absolute hell day for me. I try to stock up as much as I can in each shopping trip so as to prolong the amount of time I can avoid talking to cashiers. I think every single time I drive home from the store I've found myself mumbling "I fucking hate myself. I should fucking kill myself," groaning at how awkwardly I interacted with the cashier.

dammit I want to be loved and validated by a qt in a video not just audio. Thanks anyways though.

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>hoping I'll get to dream something nice
Damn, I know this feeling. I remember when I used to be obsessed with lucid dreaming methods so that I could induce a lucid dream and be able to always be with a dream girlfriend. Never worked out. I still hope sometimes that I'll get lucky and get one of those dreams that I've always seen people complaining about on here where they felt what it was like for a girl to love them. I guess it is awful if you only get to see her once instead of reoccurringly, but I still just want to know what it's like.

I started to make my own VN with cute girls in it once, but didn't get that far. I wish I could be like one of those creative anons who can draw cute girls or write fiction about cute girls to cope. I'm just incompetent at writing interesting characters or stories to begin with.

>literally said "you too" yesterday in response to "enjoy your food!"
I doubt I've ever felt like killing myself more than immediately after that

>dammit I want to be loved and validated by a qt in a video not just audio.
I know what you mean, man. There were a few channel I knew that were like that, but they're not even around anymore. I would recommend just finding ASMR videos of cute girls talking, even if there's nothing romantic about it. It's the closest you can expect to regularly get.

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Greentecxts?

This actually seems really cool as a short story idea for an alternate-history military fiction/worldbuilding project. Fuck, I want to write this now, man. I wish I knew how to write.

This hits really fucking close to home. I don't particularly care about becoming famous or renowned, but it's more that I wish that I could follow through on my projects and actually finish something meaningful and be satisfied with my work for once in my life. All I have is just a bunch of scraps of ideas and dreams and things I wanted to do and be and there's not much of anything else to me as a person.
>I will listen to music and put myself in as one of the band members and picture myself living that life and having that type of success and talent
I wish I knew what it was like even just to play music with other people in a band rather than just playing my shitty unfinished songs alone in my room. The very few chances I've gotten to almost collaborate with other people, I got really excited and actually bothered to spontaneously develop new songs for once. I don't come up with anything at all anymore, to say nothing of all the old songs from years ago that I've never finished. I'll listen to music sometimes and just wonder what it feels like to play such passionate music with other people that you share and build on ideas so closely with.

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>orbit a girl that I thought I could trust

pretend I was gay to have a LDR with a guy from Jow Forums

Generally my most pathetic moments are when I've just woken up and am lying in bed, or when I jerk off. Sometimes I'll stroke my own body and trick myself into thinking it's someone else doing it. I'll whisper loving things, sometimes things I would say to a girlfriend, sometimes things I imagine a girlfriend would say to me. They're probably really pathetic things to say to an SO though.

>>listen to ASMR videos of cute girls every single day, all day long if I get the chance while sitting at the computer or laying in bed and daydreaming, can't go to sleep without it, even listening to them when sitting around on campus in between classes, with a 700+ GB collection on my computer
Fuck you ASMR isnt a gf simulator

It wasn't anything more than that, shouted "god I wish I was dead" once I was in my car and didn't realize people could still hear me until I saw everyone staring at me which made me feel even worse

depends on what you watch

I sleep with the blanket wrapped around my sheet to make it feel like someone is holding me. Haven't seen my fiance for four months, or even had real physical contact with people for the whole time I've been up north at college.

Just now I realized being a het female makes me a bad person in and of itself. What will get me off tonight is knowing you'll cum into a sock or napkin or idiot. I hate you.

>Essentially, i cuddle a large pillow before going to sleep
If there's another thing I can't sleep without, it's probably hugging a pillow. I used to laugh at reading about dakimakuras and hugging pillows on Jow Forums in highschool, and then it ended up happening to me that I never lay in bed without a pillow to hug or rest my arm on. On that note, another thing I never expected to happen to me was really missing 2012-2014 Feels Era Jow Forums. It was a better kind of shit then.

The thing is that it absolutely can be if you're pathetic enough.

>or when I jerk off
Shit, you reminded me. I whisper really pathetic things to myself these days after having just cum, like, "I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry," or "Please help me, please help me," or "I just want love," or something like that. I don't even watch something fucked up or anything, I just masturbate to pictures of girls with big boobs like I'm still fourteen.

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I like to browse profiles on dating websites and just imagine what would be like dating that person. But I never even try to contact them. My imagination is a gift and a curse. I imagine fake happy memories all the time, they're so good that I actually feel really happy for a while. It's like a drug.

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I play scenes like in movies in my head of someone actually pretending to care about me. In those "scenes" there exist a cast of recurring characters that I invented that are really nothing more than imaginary friends and they play a role in each of them. The "scenes" vary from time to time, often at times being comical or really dramatic. It's a substitute for my lonely and pathetic life, a way for me to cope.

I don't know if i'm lonely or not. I don't want any friends or partners, at least not the way people have them today. They feel like empty meaningless relationships to me. Everything does, honestly i just hate this world. It's boring.

So the worst thing i do is live. I go every day dreaming and working for the time when VR is good enough that i can make my own world to live in. I know its a broken thought process, but it keeps me from pulling the trigger.

What is this post attempting to communicate? Can anyone interpret this for me?
>What will get me off tonight is knowing you'll cum into a sock or napkin or idiot
I sure wish I had an idiot to cum into. Joke's on you though, I already came into the toilet earlier, no cleanup required.

It feels like I've spent outstandingly more of my life in daydreams than in reality. I remember even in middle school daydreaming seemingly every day that some person with a similar outlook and interests would come up to me and spontaneously become my friend, and sometimes I would daydream that that person would be a girl who would shyly show interest in me out of nowhere, as I would sit alone on a bench on the playground trying not to look at anyone or make eye contact with anyone.

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i have what most people call a tulpa. i love them and talk to them all the time but they could never replace a real person, as much as we both wish they could. so now i suppose we just feel lonely together, though it hurts a lot more for me. this is probably the most autistic thing in the thread by the definition of most people, but to me their creation was probably the best decision i have ever made.

I used to be really obsessed about virtual reality some years ago even though I still didn't really bank on it taking off and becoming all that satisfying in my lifetime. It's a nice hope and makes for a good daydream, but I really don't expect that I'll live even to see low-grade AI companions capable of limited conversation with a little more dynamicity than just a small handful of quickly exhausted stock phrases, unlike the current chatbots in existence.

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Whenever I'm alone, I fantasize about my oneitis being there with me

I feel like a lot of traps on Jow Forums and elsewhere aren't actually gender-bendy, they're just so lonely that the only way to get a feminine and loving vibe around them is to BE the feminine and loving vibe. If you can't get a woman then be a woman. Which is extremely sad

>those erotic asmr videos
i never was able to masturbate to orgams until some beautiful user linked one here
there's some sexy shit on Jow Forumsgonewildaudio, the milf sleeps with her neighbors series of audios is pretty good until after you nut and you realize you've been jacking off to a recording of some 20 something neet saying she has big boobs

>recording of some 20 something neet saying she has big boobs
That's all it takes, really. I haven't listened to lewd audio in a while, but the Japanese have taken that sort of thing to a professional level that just does not exist in the west, where you can only get shitty production quality amateur stuff. It just sucks that with Japanese stuff the voice acting, without exception, sounds like irritating squealy anime characters rather than actual human beings.