> Be me >Year 2 (live in new zealand) >This girl has a crush on me and wont leave me alone >Ijustwanttowatchben10.jpeg >At playground on top of the climbing wall with her >Decide to do something about it >Push her off the climbing wall and sprint away >Ohshit.wav >think i'll get caught >Mfw i just looked like an accident >Mfw she broke an arm and her collarbone >Mfw she didn't know it was me
We became boyfriend/girlfriend after that without me ever telling anyone
>be me, 8th grade >pokemon x comes out >hear a girl talking about how to evolve syvleon in algebra >"yeah to evolve her i think you have to level up eevee's happiness" >WRONG >i have to intervene >"ACKCHYUALLYYYYYYY, YOURE SUPPOSED TO LEVEL UP THEIR LOVE STAT (i forgot what its called i havent played in a while) IN POKEMON AMIE" >"no i think its the other way" >"YOU OBVIOUSLY HAVE NO IDEA WHAT YOURE TALKING ABOUT YOU RETARD" >she never talks to me again
its a good thing i turned out to be gay with all the autistic shit i said to girls in middle school
Chase Morris
>used to go over to my grandma's house a lot >she had a large wooden box she kept the toys in >small enough to fit in the box >take the toys out, climb in and close the lid >sit there in silence for a while and escape into my autistic mind >no one ever knew
I also used to sit in her basement and do the same thing in the dark. If I could interact with my childhood self I'd be very concerned.
>in the 90s when I was 8 during the height of pokemon >used to stare out the window for hours at a time trying to spot pokemon >told my Mum I saw a pidgey and a spinirak
Matthew Rogers
>pre school >we have nap time >I fucking hate nap time >can never get to sleep >just have to lie there bored out of my mind >one day I've had enough >get up and push over a bookshelf on another child >starts screaming and crying Idk why the fuck I did that, but I was like 4 at the time
>be 3rd grade >just transferred to new school >having trouble fitting in >sitting in class one day >hear other kids talking about how weird I am >get up on top of desk >shout "I AM NOT WEEEEEEIRD!" >class starts laughing >get off of table >throw backpack on the ground and start kicking the shit out of it, still enraged
in third grade I used to intentionally rush to sit next to this one girl I liked on the floor and try to position my knee so it was touching her knee because her skin felt real good
Levi Brooks
>9th grade >On debate team >Pretty good for a novice, one of the first year hotshots >Tournament on a Friday and I don't want to get my suit wrinkled in a bag so wear it all day with jacket over it >In biology >Crush on shy qt >Get an idea >Wait until after class >Leave jacket on chair >Most debate and forensics people wore their suits on tournament days so that much wasn't weird >Go up to her desk to ask about some homework >Put elbow on desk because I think it looks cool >Thought the whole thing made me seem confident >Lose my nerve when I realize how autistic I look >Suddenly can't speak >Feel spaghetti beginning to spill >Notice she's got a Triforce shirt on >Say the first thing that comes to mind >"Man Tingle sure does have a boner for balloons" >Walk away >Put jacket back on
>middle school >Buy leather jacket because I thought it was cool >people look at me and laugh >anger.webm >start breathing heavy in the lunch room "What are you gonna do user, shoot us up?" >start going hnnnnnng like I'm about to kamehamehah >raise up my arm like I'm about to smack him >he guy punches me and I lay down on floor crying >leave while yelling "I'll be you for this" >realize years later that holy fuck I'm retarded
>be me >10 >not autistic, but have anger issues >some piece of shit decides to bully me >unironically REEEE at him, and try to fight him >teacher comes to intervene >punch him in the throat and push him >chase piece of shit until he gives up and decides to fight me >beat the living shit outta him >get expelled from the best school in my city because i couldn't hold myself back >tfw wasn't even my fault >tfw never talked to the qt in my class
Ethan Lewis
>be me >kindergarten >substitute teacher that day >substitute begins with introductions >"you're all going to say your name and something about yourself starting with user. We will go to the left, then up, then right, then up and left again, like a snake" >goes first >gets out of chair >lies down on stomach >wriggles to the next desk without using my arms or legs >hissing the entire time I do this >"Hi, I'm user!" says something about myself >rinse and repeat until I have slithered by every desk >takes about 7 minutes to do >sub thinks I am retarded >whole class thinks I am retarded >called snake boy the rest of the week
Cameron Gray
>be me, preschool >have some Dr Seuss day where we read his books & are green eggs (scrambled) and ham along with goldfish >eat the ham and gold fish >I ain't touchin green eggs my nigga >teachers tell me to eat it >no >they feed me gold fish >say in order for me to get more gold fish I must eat my green eggs >I need gold fish sustinance >a n g e r y >throw little fit over it
All I can think of
Sebastian Walker
>be me >3rd grade >had some kid who had hit puberty for some reason >with friends & him >"hey guys do you have high pain tolerance" >we all say yeah >we actually don't except like 1 kid >"can i test it? Ill punch you in the chest then you me" >sure >punches me >i feel nothing >"nothing much" >punch him "Nothing much m8" >pain is kicking in >feels like my lungs are collapsing >"alright see you guys in a bit" >go to bench and fucking die on the inside while trying to look my best
Jason Garcia
>be me >19yo >believe that I will get superpowers if I concentrate hard enough >try to lift up a car in public >convinced that I can speak to animals because I was kind to a groundhog once and he opened my mind to the animal language I think I win, buckos
Joseph Taylor
>mid 90s >Neighbor complains about not being able to grill >Disconnect propane tank on Dad's grill >Roll it over to neighbors yard >Hook up propane tank >Knock on neighbors door and tell him he can grill now >Tells my dad what i did >Get a beating for it >Still didn't understand what I did wrong for at least 3 more years
Ian Gray
>I was kind to a groundhog once and he opened my mind to the animal language
not really autistic, but this has been on my mind today >be me in 2nd grade >playing some trivia game >desks are set up in a big horseshoe formation >i'm at the end of the horseshoe, so my turn is last >my question finally comes, one shot at glory >"what type of cheese has holes in it? >"swiss cheese, string cheese, cheddar cheese, or parmesian cheese?" >"umm, string cheese?" >"what string cheese? are you serious user? its swiss cheese" >thought she said "what cheese has ropes in it?" for some reason >thought string cheese could be considered "ropey" or something >still haunts me to this day
Jason Ramirez
>be me >be around 5 >want bath toy but mommy locked them in the closer >grab an empty pickle jar off the shelf >sit in the bath and toss jar >shatters and I giggle at sound was hilarious at time >be slicing myself with broken glass think its just the jar >moms face when she walks in
writing this out reminded me of another story from that grade >teacher reading the lion the witch and the wardrobe out loud to the class >tells us to visualize whats happening in our mind's eye >try to visualize it but nothing >think i'm supposed to literally start seeing shit >try harder, start clenching my eyes as hard as i can >start seeing weird LSD type patterns >think its starting to work >basically just cut off circulation to my eyeballs and start seeing colors and shit >do this for the whole half hour she was reading out loud because i thought i just had to practice to be able to see the book and not just random patterns and colors >she finishes the chapter and i open my eyes >can't see >start freaking out >tell her i cn't see >"what do you mean you can't see?" >tell her what i was trying to do, crying at this point because i think im blind now >berates me for being dumb in a kind of joking way then takes me to the nurse >vision comes back on the way there
Brody Diaz
I didn't really think you guys were actually artists. I remember tricking an autist into thinking he can read minds or something by putting his hands in his temple gun shaped and looking down like he is a pagan heathen. Was hilarious, he was suspicious but too autistic and brushed it off.
Levi Richardson
So what did u do wrong? Apart from giving away that propane tank for free
Caleb James
When I was really upset and crying I would sing or hum loudly to try to comfort myself
Brandon Nelson
>~13 Years Old >tried freaky hard to use telekinesis on small objects >figured if I dedicated enough mental power on one very small object I could make it float >tried this every day for a week before giving up
>Man Tingle sure does have a boner for balloons" There's actually a japanese balloon fight game that crops the original balloon fight character for tingle.
Elijah Thomas
i did this too, also tried to cast spells with a magic wand i got from some dragon book thing
Chase Sullivan
I think I had the same book bro. There were lots of flaps you could open in the pages and the whole thing was made to look thicker and older than it really was. I wanted to make the potion that would make me better at chess but I didnt have any avocados.
Am a different user but dude I had the same book!! I loved it so much and still have the stickers from it
Joshua Flores
>went to aunt's house when I was 7 >she has a wooden doll of a girl in a kimono with huge tits >don't even understand the concept of sex >get a raging hard on >whip out my 7 year old microdick and rub it on the doll >cum and walk out of there like nothing happend >2 years ago be 22 and go back to aunt's for a week >can't fap due to minimal privacy >4 days go by and my balls are hurting and cock is throbbing >need to bust a nut before I loose it >walk into a room and find the doll >remember my first sexual experience >overwhelmed with nostalgia and lust >check the area to make sure I'm alone >pick up my little wooden waifu and titfuck her >blow my load all over her face >she's drizzled in my cum >clean her up and walk away
