Comfy feels thread

if you need to vent, get something off of your chest, or just talk to another human being, you are welcome to post in this thread.
i will try to respond to whatever you post, good or bad, for as long as i can.

i will not judge you. i will not hate you.
i only wish to listen. to understand.
because everyone deserves to be understood, right?
maybe not. but i will try anyways.

also, feel free to post any image you would like.
maybe consider posting someone (or something) you like a whole lot.

i can't decide what is more dangerous: chaos or apathy.

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Yeah I definitely need to vent. That one person I talk to constantly and whom I ignored for awhile because you're a massive bitch, I fucking hate you, I fucking hate your dumb stuck up attitude, I hate your stupid fucking entitlement, and I hate your stupid fucking voice too. Die cunt for real.

I am very unhappy. I have been like this for a while. Usually I'm neutral to everything. I guess I miss the apathy.
It is strange. Maybe a good thing has brought me more misery.
Anyway I know I need to change something. I've need to change something for a while now. I don't know what it is.
I'm starting to think magic is my only hope.
It's probably going to be magic or death. Honestly I'm not sure which I want more.
I just want to curl up cry and disappear.
Usually i would just say oh well and keep going. I can't do that anymore.

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Why did all my friends left me? Everything was alright and we almost talked everyday. I'm sure i haven't done anything wrong but just one day they don't talk to me anymore and just plain out ignore me. What im craving now is just human interaction, anything.

I have no real friends outside of the Internet, only those who will hang out with me if they have nothing else to do. I constantly have nothing to do, and I ruined the few friendships I had. I've been abusing pills since I was 13.

you probably did nothing wrong user, people are just bitches. I've tried to self reflect on everything I've "done" to ruin friendships, but I haven't done anything. People are just shitty.

femanon here. i have recently realized that i am completely unique. not in my mannerisms or looks or style, my issues are completely different from anyone i know.
daddy issues- father is moving out to other side of state with his new wife and two children who are less than 2 years old, meanwhile my mom is on an executive business trip in Miami, she is in the one percent, my father is in the bottom 5.
2- boys. fuck. i am 19 fucking years old an i cannot get over my obsession with e-boys. the first was from Iowa. the second from Newcastle. and then i just meta shitton and sent nudes and regretted it. i cannot find a boy who lives near me who loves me. and then there's him. fucking him. i am the only person in the country who must have this fucking problem. i messaged him on insta a few weeks ago. he's kinda famous. you prolly count guess who but if i told you you'd be surprised. he wants me to be his sex slave, but refuses to try and see me whatsoever. he's wishy-washy and puts the minimal amt of effort in and expects me to stay. i have a lot of info that the media would loooove but i don't think i would ever give it away because i still hold on to something that's not quite there. there's this guy in one of my classes that's nice. solid 6.5/10, just broke up w/ his gf of 9 months. was staring in my eyes today, have started to flirt with him. should i go for it and drop all of my bullshit?

that's alright, friend. i hope you feel at least a little bit better now.

i get the feeling. though if you're anything like me, you'd be surprised at just how much longer you can keep going like this despite how unbearable it may feel. it's not easy to change something, even in the worst situation, it seems. i'm not really sure what you mean by "magic", whether it's in a sort of "i hope something really great and mysterious randomly happens to me and pulls me out of this neverending hellfire i've found myself burning in" way, or something else.
either way, friend, i wish you luck in figuring out what you need to change, and changing it. be careful.

it most likely wasn't your fault, friend. sometimes people just won't like you for one dumb reason or another, or maybe they will just get "bored" of you if you aren't "interesting" enough. there are plenty of possibilities, but the truth is you usually won't know the answer, and it usually isn't even worth wondering. all you can do is move on. i know it hurts, but it happens to all of us. well, some of us, here at least.

13 is a rough age to start something like that man. i understand the friend thing though, of course. but there's plenty you can do even when you don't have friends. i know that isn't really the problem, but it helps me sometimes to at least to focus on other issues whenever i get really lonely. i hope things get better for you friend, good luck.

honestly, i want to believe this is just some kind of bait post and i'm being stupid for replying but it almost seems sort of genuine in a way. perhaps that's just my own naivety, but even if you are being genuine, it confuses me that you would be asking for help in a place like this. there's nothing i can really tell you or relate to here, but good luck, i guess?

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I mean magic or a miracle. Something otherworldly. I can't see anything else helping.
I don't want to go on like this. The problem is I can see myself living life day to day never doing anything.
I've been like this before always hitting a new low. When will it be enough.
All I do is hide away or complain about things. I can't even think of a better life while I'm laying down before sleep.
I've thought about suicide every day for a long time now. I never have the will to do it. I'm just stuck continuously falling down.

so the former then. i wish i didn't know that feeling as well as i do. it all just doesn't make sense sometimes. why doesn't something just happen? surely humans aren't meant to live life day after day, getting worse and worse with no hope until we die like this. there has to be some kind of option or choice to make aside from death, but it's so hard to see any. the fog just gets thicker and thicker, until we eventually take that fatal misstep into the void.
you don't want to go on like this, but you do. that simple fact is terrifying.

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I really fucked up with one of my few friends a couple months ago. We got into a big fight and I ended up blocking him on everything. I've felt fucking terrible about it for a while now, and decided I'd try and apologize today. The hard part is that I have no idea what to say so I'm just sitting here in the dark feeling like ass as I try and come up with an apology for someone who probably has me blocked.

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I started cuddling with an extra pillow at night. I've realized how lonely I am and need some form of affection. My pillow is not like those long dakimakura pillows. It's a normal pillow. I like to fantasize that I'm holding a quad amputee in my arms like in pic-related. Now, all I want to do is curl up into ball while holding my pillow tightly. I know that naturally we will cling to objects as substitute companions when isolated, but I'm worried it's going to create an unhealthy mindset that will be hard to shake. It reminds me of Harry Harlow's experiments with rhesus monkeys. Has anyone ever heard of those experiments? They were very beneficial in the field of psychology, but they don't have an uplifting aftermath.

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ive had bulimia for months and i didn't even consider it a problem until i realized how shitty it was for my body. i think the worst part is no one notices it so ill probably never stop. ive only told one person and they thought i gave it up, but now its worse than ever. i've even started doing it at work and it just feels so good, and god its so easy to hide in comparison to some other destructive things. im just extremely unhappy with myself, i can't stand the sight of my body. i just want to be thin and good looking and i feel like i never will be. ill never be able to be confident or feel normal and i hate that. i want to keep going until i at least like myself but how can i know if ill ever get there

I've officially ended high school without friends :(

well, it's good that you would like to apologize at least, but i know it's difficult to come up with a good way to say things. i hope you end up saying what you want to say and he understands. good luck friend.

i remember you posted in the last thread i made, but i went to sleep beforehand and no one else replied to you. i didn't know about the monkey experiments but i just read a little about it and i think i get what you mean. i honestly don't think cuddling a pillow would be bad for you though, i do it sometimes too. the way we live is already "unhealthy" enough being so isolated, so i feel like cuddling a pillow would only be an "improvement" if anything. but that's just what i think. good luck out there friend.

i'm a little underweight but not bulimic, so i wouldn't know exactly what you should be doing or what to say to you. but you should at least know that going the way you are now is a perfect way to ensure that you will never ever feel good about yourself or the way you look. i wish i had something better to say, but i wish you luck in overcoming that obstacle someday, friend.

lets just hope you won't be officially ending existence without friends. that's all that really matters concerning that now, at that point in your life.

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Everytime I'm in a social situation I get so hung up on my own thoughts of weakeness, self doubt and of what is actually fun for people, that I just close myself. I'm allways so concerned if people are hating it, or mocking me or even dropping small contextual clues that only I can't see. This allways leads me to think that if they wanted they would just leave. Am I just cynical?

Fuck man, everything is so weird right now for me. I have no idea what my sexuality is, I have no idea what I want to do in life and I'm hella lonely too...
Today I jerked off to a gay fantasy I had and actually kind of panicked when I didn't feel all that attracted to girls right after... I don't want to be gay. I want my parents to see me marry a nice woman, and be happy for me. I hate it, why am I such a degenerate pice of shit?

I've been trying to quit smoking for the last 3 years, energy drinks for about a year and now fapping for about 6 months. However each time I fail I lose a little bit of will power, and now it seems like I have no chance for success.

However because defeat occurs in the mind I'm not going to become self-defeating and hopelessly pessimistic. For a while I've been trying to go from every hour to every 2 hours with smoking but because that hasn't worked I'm working on every hour and a half.

The day after drinking 6 cans of soda to finish off the 12 pack I started to get bad soda cravings, but curiously I decided to tolerate the stress and let it pass. That shows going every hour and half is starting to work because usually I just take the path of least resistance and cave at the first sign of adversity.

For smoking I'm going to every hour and a half for April and May, every 2 hours for June and July, every 3 hours for August and September then quit at the end of September. That's the best plan I've thought of yet, and I've been developing toughness which will only get stronger as time goes on.

I'm starting to get tired of T. V. since I've been watching it so much to pass the time, and I got tired Battlefield 4 after just half an hour, and I don't have the endurance to do anything else when I reach my limit. However if I get tired of it enough I'll force myself to do other things, and that's just another false notion I have to prove wrong if I'm ever going to quit smoking.

Looking at this thread everyone is so down on their luck I'm afraid they're doing themselves psychological damage. When you focus on how bad everything is you're causing yourself to become more depressed. I'm 33 and despite being pretty bad my 20's were a lot better than my 30's so far. Take the time to appreciate the things you have, and let go of the things you don't have.

So entertainment the best lives and the best everything. That's how they get people to watch but it's unrealistic.

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I don't think jerk off fantasies translate directly into who you'd actually sleep with in real life. I jerk off to a lot of 2D gay furry shit, like twinks and stuff, but I don't think I've ever seen an actual real male that I was attracted to. Of course I'm also a khv and probably too timid to sleep with anyone even if I could, I dunno how much weight my opinion holds.

I'd note that your brain is weird about that kind of thing when you're already horny so you shouldn't take it to seriously, plus you can be attracted to both men and women, you can have a wife and also like dick. At the end of the day you should focus more on being honest with yourself than trying to make other people happy, even if it's uncomfortable at first. Don't live a lie, you'll regret it and become a shell of yourself.

Those are just my thoughts though

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i do the same thing sometimes. it's probably something to do with cynicism, hating yourself, overthinking everything, etc.
this probably won't help you much, but just remember that most of the things you're worrying about probably aren't true, or vastly over-exaggerated. something like this isn't very easy to deal with, but i hope maybe you can work on improving it if that is what you want, friend.

it's okay to worry about disappointing your parents in the case that you really do feel that way. maybe you should try and ask yourself what you really feel without any kind of hatred, regardless of what you think about sexuality. it would help to be less confused, at least. but this is admittedly a pretty complicated subject, so you probably won't know for sure how you feel right now. just don't panic, i suppose. i wish you luck in dealing with whatever you find, friend.

your determination is admirable, friend. reading your post gave me a little bit of hope, somehow. just seeing someone succeed even in the smallest way where i have not, yet. focusing on the positive is never easy, even when i'm not just wallowing in self-loathing i'm focusing too much on how i could be better rather than what good i have now. it's simple but i haven't thought about it in a while, so thank you, friend. good luck with kicking those terrible habits of yours and replacing them with better ones. i know you can do it.

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I feel so utterly useless. I want to give my love, my devotion, my entire being to someone but I cant seem to do that with anyone. I want to be alone but I also want to be able to lie next to someone, look at them and tell them I love them. Im tired of feeling lonely.

it seems like i have everything going for me. i have a masters, work full time, have some friends who i see once in a while...but i still feel incredibly lonely and cry a lot more than i used to, i've never had a girlfriend and i'm 25 and so i think the feelings that are associated with this are starting to catch up with me. i don't even know why im pained by this so much because like i said before, everything else is going quite well. however, i just need someone to talk to because its friday night and once again im not doing anything

Funny I've tried talking feels with OP before but she'd never share her own or ever respond to mine as much as she does to anons.

Is Undertale actually good or is it just a meme? I know the fanbase sucks but how is the game itself?

Is OP a woman? That devalues this thread immensely for me.

I did too, I still have no friends a year after graduation. Time is slipping away, Ill be a 25 khhv NEET before I know it

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Possibly just plays the part of one.

What makes you say that? Nothing from this thread or previous ones made me think that.

I wish i was a cute loli goat boy but also a magical girl, theres nothing you can say that will comfort me for not having this OP

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Because I know them from beyond the thread.

I hate you.
You ruined one of the few threads I enjoyed.

I got all self destructive again today. Random episode of disappointment over not doing a job at work well enough, that slowly escalated into me wanting to quit my job right there, then to want to just lie in bed and do nothing, then to burn the stuff in my room that was dirty or not where it was supposed to be, then I wanted to hurt myself for wanting to burn my stuff, decided this is why I was lonely and feeling like I wanted to die, then I got my knife out and made a few cuts while softly sobbing walking in circles for about 2 hours that I was such a bitch for having to resort to hurting myself again, and I deserved to bleed all over my room for letting myself get so far gone into the spiral that I was still allowing myself to leave the house and pretend I am a person with worth. This all escalated in the span of a half-hour, and ended 3 hours later with me drinking myself into a stupor.

I hate myself randomly and nothing has any purpose. I don't feel happy that I finished college because I didn't score high enough, I'm not happy with my new job because I fucked up something simple, I'm not happy with how I look because I hate myself (I can't even look in a mirror without feeling like I want to cry), so I just act out and break stuff and hurt myself because I can. Literally the only reason I'm alive is because my motorcycle and my dog give me purpose.

I want to be better, but I don't know how.

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I've started to stagnate with my best friends due to nothing at all changing with how i live my life. Nothing new happens and meeting up with them has gone from something fun i look forward to to something awkward and depressing that i regret after. I'm scared I'll lose them and grow to have nothing.

>Fell in love with my coworker
>One of the sweetest people I've ever met. Told me bluntly she'd never make fun of me or judge me. Feel like I can talk to her about anything
>Really want to hang out with her outside of work or get a drink or something but it hasn't happened in the 2 years I've known her
>I want to tell her how lonely I am, how much I hate my life outside of work and how I just wish I had a friend to hang out with
>Afraid she might agree to hang out with me, but only because she feels bad for me

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I'm so sorry user. Tomorrow's a Saturday, and if that don't work Sunday's usually everybody's free day. Set an objective for the day and try to cut out all the bullshit, just think about how you're gonna do it, then do it. Try to think as little as you can. Make sure it's something out of the house too, something you can do at a library or some place like that.

Am I lazy for not wanting to work 4 days a week?
I don't need the money and i don't want to spend the majority of my week at a place i really don't want to be for a little extra cash. I don't want hand outs or anything i just don't need it. It just seems like that's what people think when it comes up. I'm being moved up to 4 days soon and i'm honestly dreading it.

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if it works for you man there's no problem with that.

Good job making op leave you stupid jerk

OP went to sleep earlier. Quit crying, dude.

Anyone have any experiences with therapy? I'm considering going just to get some stuff off my chest.

I went as a kid. Somehow it was covered under my parents health insurance. I think it was useless personally. He came to the conclusion that I needed to be on some sort of antidepressants but my parents didn't want me on any sort of drugs. I didn't even really tell him honestly why I was depressed because it was embarassing (girl problems).

i was lonely today so i wandered around the city for a while because just being out of the house helps a lot
a few hours ago i got yelled at by some dude on a corner so i hung out with them and kinda started to be a part of their group
he keeps heckling people for money in a jovial way, half for show and half to actually make money
some guy steps out of a cab, obviously drunk, and promises he'll be right down with some money
when he comes down (big surprise) he gives me a twenty and says "and some for the lady"
i call him a faggot despite always wanting to be a girl or at least perceived femininely
why am i such a fuck up r9k
i take the one good thing that's happened to me in months and utterly shit all over it

I am apathy.

I'm not feeling well.
I'm as far down as I've ever been.
I don't know if I can keep falling.
I wanna die.
By user.