It was your parents, wasn't it? I know. We're all in the same boat. Tell me about them

Study purposes. They're here now and we live as a "family" but I'm on the edge of moving out as soon as gf finishes her current school year.

>boomer parents
>mom waited until like 45 to have me, surprised i didn't come out retarded
>smoked and drank during my entire carriage term
>still didn't come out retarded
>parents not financially ready for a kid, couldn't give me more than the absolute bare necessities
>this is despite being an only child
>got sent off to college, told to take out 80k worth of loans at 11% apr
>boomers didn't pitch in a single cent
>now trying to finish my last semester dealing with mountains of debt and now my car is breaking down and it also seems like boomer mom might need to go to the hospital because she's a fucking billion and slapped me with the burden of dealing with old decrepit parents at fucking 22

life is suffering and then you die

Attached: porn stop.jpg (821x1024, 39K)

And didn't you move with then earlier?
Can't wrap my head around the idea of leaving your child with your parents and almost never seeing him

besides the drinking that literally my parents are we brothers user?

No. It was me.

Dad didn't really work my entire childhood, raising me was his full time job except for when he ran away to San Fransisco for a year when I was little. He's never been married but he had a long term girlfriend for about six or seven years. who knows how many bastard children he has. He recently begun working again but he lost his job for taking too many days off.

experiences with him:
>That time he bragged about having a 3some the girls bathroom at a bar and drove home drunk
>That time he suggest I have a summer fling with a girl, I said something to her about how he said that and she went back to our campsite and fucked him
>Struggling to fix cars
>Listening to country music in the car

Mom hasn't worked in a decade or more, she sits on the couch and uses discord or enters sweepstakes. She did when she was young but she never kept a job long. She has this online friend she talks to once a week. She hasn't been married either but she had a boyfriend for about 5 years as well, they did quite a few hard drugs together.

experiences with her:
>That time she drank the whole bottle of promethazine codeine syrup and took a temazepam and went on an hour long sermon about family and how much she loves us then passed out
>When she was absolutely convinced she was losing her mind but she seemed perfectly sane
>Playing Donkey Kong 64 and Tetris with her

They're both decent drivers and I don't know why they didn't stay together longer, they've been broken up since I was a baby.

Well I'm glad because it will make me not miss them as much at all when I move out but currently it is still annoying as they have this expectation that I should love them and such. They treat me like a trust fund in which they put money and hope I become a literal millionaire so they can live off me.

Mom:
>psycopath
>controlling
>alcoholic
>sent us to an expensive christian school because she wanted to look good
>sent me and my brother to educational help even though neither of us needed it, we just needed help taking notes
>literally just cooked dinner and worked, and often didn't even cook dinner
>i had to do all of the cleaning
>i had to get my brother to do his homework
>i had to be a good role model for my brother
>bought us video games to shut us up, got surprised when we spent all our time on video games
>worried that if we watched an r-rated movie or played a video game with guns, we'd end up as school shooters
dad:
>good guy
>philosophy major
>taught me to read
>taught me to write
>taught me to throw a ball, etc
>didn't kill my mom when he found out she cheated on him
>was very calm
>took her yelling at him like a champ
>wanted to stay with her, but the cheating had to stop
>accepted the divorce
>respectful in court
>screwed over by my mom's bitch lawyer
>was allowed every other weekend to see me and my brother
>mom rarely took us
>he gets mad, the only thing he ever got mad about was us
>mom warps it into this thing where he's verbally abusing her or some shit
>he gets his influence on schooling decisions taken away for it
mfw

Attached: 1513883926116.jpg (558x480, 35K)

Nah, pretty sure it was all the bullying in elementary school. My parents fought a lot (they are far better now) and my dad hit me some times, but it must have been school because even now I sometimes have nightmares about it

>religious overbearing parents
>too many kids, not enough money
>got the belt/spanked as a kid
>dinners ended in yelling a lot because my oldest sister was bipolar and they never sought treatment for her
>I ended up gay (just fuck off with your abuse, I already know I'm a degenerate piece of shit guys)
>they didn't like that one bit
>cried when I told them, never spoke of it again
>they're violently homophobic and racist/xenophobic
>after coming out to them it got so bad I tried to hang myself
>didn't work because I'm too tall and couldn't do it properly
>they never taught me empathy
>only to hate others
>as an adult I now suffer from severe anxiety, probably bipolar disorder like my oldest sister
>I only talk to them once a week
>I could have grown up normal
>frequently remember traumatic shit from my childhood, such as watching my sister get beat my dad with her purse
>I abuse alcohol and heavy drugs now
>disappointed when I wake up and am not dead

Attached: 46 - rayMCv2.jpg (507x504, 36K)

My parents were great. They just moved around too much. So I never learnt to deal with my peers properly, as it was a different set of peers every few years.
So I learnt that the answer to my problems was always 'keep head down, and run away when you can'.
Now I'm 44 and alone.

Seems like we grew up similar.

>too tall to hang himself
lol. fuck your parents though, get a nice boyfriend. i envy you faggots, i imagine gay guys are better than women.

>blaming parents

There are people who were molested, anally raped by their dad and yet now grown up, they are full of confidence and don't blame their past for how they are in the present. You are responsible for your life, you and you only.

Problem is I am terrified of men. I've been taught my whole life that faggotry is a sin, so any feelings I've ever had for a male are muted and repressed.

>envy gays
that's a really normie thing to say

You *should* be terrified of men, we are awful.
t. went to all boy boarding school, Public School for the britbongs here

over protective mom, weak dad..
the key to my health has been emancipation, both of them from my lives and of the programming that i was given. i was stifled and all kinds of fucked up that i don't care to discuss . there was an incredible amount of emotional pain that i had to release too.
wew laddy
they did the best they could but im still mad. they're not healthy and so they passed that poison onto me. luckily i rebelled and.. i'm doing ok now. thought for sure id commit suicide

>parents loved me very much and did everything they could for me
>still turned out a mentally unstable basket case
my main issue is my physical appearance and all of my mental issues stem from it. However my stacy older sister is a neurotic mess and even my chad kid brother has issues with panic and anxiety. It is definitely genetic to some extent, but my parents must have fucked up and I am just unable to see it because of bias. How else could they raise 3 fucked up kids? My siblings are doing well and excel in their endeavors; I'm the only one who didn't make it. I blame it on my circumcision, which has been shown to permanently and negatively alter the limbic system in newborns

Attached: henose.png (640x1136, 1.13M)

As some other user said here the other day:
>accept your family is retarded, cut all ties and move on
That's what I plan to do, I'm already getting the money to get out of the house and then disappear forever. If these fucks took care of me when I was a kid, none of this shit would happen.

Oh boy, where do I start?
>Parents are African and Muslim
>have 2 brothers and a sister with BPD
>get bullied by kids in school because I'm black
>me and my siblings would get beaten to shit, because dad is a fucking religious nut
>Like if you pronounced a word wrong in arabic he would beat you up for it
>grow up to have shit-teir writing skills, I used to think my teachers thought I was retarded, simply because of my writing.
>parents eventually send sister to Africa thinking that would somehow fix her (it didn't)
>move to australia, because shit is getting overpriced in nz
>have to change schools like 3 times in the span of 3 months
>eventually settle down in rural melbourne
>sister comes back,shit goes down (police get called 2 times)gets kicked out of the house later on (Trip to Africa didn't help at all)
>still get beaten because of crappy writing and Arabic skills
>eventually grow up and realise that this religion has caused me nothing but pain.
>get taller, go to the gym more.
>still have to hide my disbeliever values because parents are dumbcunts who like to paint themselves as victims.
>the beatings have stopped but parents still always bug me about praying and reading the quran.
>become severly depressed usually isolate myself in my room. Writing still hasn't improved,grades are going down the shitter, feel tired 90% of the time.
I just want to fall asleep forever

Attached: 1523588585544.jpg (200x248, 6K)

They didn't do the best they could, but who does anyway? I think they did thing that they could and had awareness of. This is just my hand and now I'm making the best of it just like them. They're both dysfunctional and have moved toward approximating a healthy life as they've got older. It's all any of us can try to do.

Hard drugs. Neglect.

Honestly, I only started coming to r9k because I was frustrated about being a virgin.
Looking back though, I denied women left and right. All because I restricted myself to finding a virgin gf. But I thought I fucked up, that I wasted my highschool youth being afraid of rejection when that was the only chance I had at getting a virgin gf.
I ended up getting a virgin gf though, and she's been my gf for the past 3 years.
I don't really know why I still come here. This place doesn't even resemble the board I used to enjoy visiting.

Attached: 1473998243400.jpg (225x225, 7K)

For 90% robots the problem is:

> absent father
> narcissistic mother
> attachment issues
> C-PTSD

Oh and /soc/ rated me a 3/10 so that fucked up my confidence.

I love my mother and she did great for what she had. Raised me and my brother with no child support and always made sure Christmas/bdays were special. Bought me a ps2 even tho she was upside on her mortgage and an inch from losing her house. Shes a great women and I should really call her.

My dad on the other hand, he was ok I guess. Saw him every other weekend until I was about 15. I dont think he was bad but maybe just not good. I havent talked to him in almost two years.

your story/writing sucks

I summarized most of it. Plus I'm on a phone, so of course it's gonna be pretty shitty

Yeah we are all products of conditioning.

I hate them.

My dad is a physically abusive alcoholic/cocaine addict.

My mom is an emotionally abusive, manipulative, controlling opiate addict who cares more for her own self-rightousness and validating that she's a good person more than she cares for the mental stability and happiness of her kids.

Same, except for everything after dad never being around.

No role models
No heroes
Just boy raised by a screen

There are also millionaires and billionaires, whats your point?

I never rebelled because I was scared it would kill her. Now when she cries when I go out, i just lash out and tell her to shut it.
Still feel trapped and isolated. Probably developed a few personality disorders and severe intimacy issues. I don't feel comfortable in my skin at all.
I thought at 26, I reached the peak of feeling like shit. Recently I've been feeling really numb to everything and it scares me.

>Socially incompetent
That's all I can say

Attached: 1471190378231.gif (207x207, 808K)

Wish I had have been more important to them then their jobs were

Father was never around came around ever 4 year interval typically seeking something or in some instances just homeless. Mother left home without any word never heard from her again at age 15. Im 21 now

I still dont know what my father's true intentions are, he is an alcoholic and has a fucked up personality because of his very dark past but i'm glad he's here, my mother on the other hand is a bitch that abandoned me and my little brother when we were kids to live as a stronk independent gold digger bitch.
I'm 18 and i need to get a job and live by myself

who did you live with when your mom left

I attempted keeping a house afloat but that sunk after 5 months then i went homeless for almost 2 years living in a storage unit and taking a shower in a gym at a local community college. Eventually one of my co workers let me move in with them

i never met my father
my mother was more interested in recapturing her own youth than trying to raise any of her children and an alcoholic
she repeatedly dated scumbags, drug addicts and other alcoholics and they would smash the house up and argue and beat eachother throughout my life
ive never spoken to her for more than 2 minutes at a time, she clearly has no interest in me and i have none in her in turn
the only reason she lets me live with her is so she can still convince herself that she's a "good mom"

>Blaming your parents for your shitty personality.
This was okay as a kid, but you're in control of your life now, and it's not their fault that you're too much of an invalid to improve.

Attached: file.png (467x456, 286K)

>you're in control of your life now.
This.

You just have to fix whatever your parents failed to help you with or whatever they damaged in the process.
Most likely you would have to learn to just cope.
Get your revenge when they're old. Be happy. Raise successful kids or do whatever makes you happy in life.
Then watch them rot in a nursing home.
Life is hard and it's literally a dog eat dog world.

mum's a weak but loving woman who's not very bright, was abused as a kid and lacks a lot of confidence, sheltered me. dad was suspected of autism as a child and couldn't get into the army due to not passing the mental health test, is obsessive, controlling and socially inept, can be violent. both sheltered me and both gave me no proper guidance in life, it's like I was raised by two weirdos and now I'm a robot, they're strange black sheep of both of their families, and so am I and my brothers.

was literally raised on video games, kind of surreal, more so than I think the average person. I'm 20 and my dad hasn't even bothered to teach me how to drive, he didn't help me with school or enrolling in university, barely a decent father figure. probably why I'm a faggot now too, I bet a lot of money on it.

Attached: 1523750158667.png (1100x1100, 311K)

This. They never pushed me to do anything.

A family of robots. lmao

shit forgot this was a feels thread my bad

>father third grade reading level
>he's schizoaffective
>retired by 30s due to bad behavior and on the bux
>abusive
>mother takes one shower a week
>weighs like 400 lbs
>no teeth
>super nice
>diagnosed with munchausen by proxy

But wait there's more!

>after being raised to age eleven by them was put in foster care so aged out of foster care

Le twenty-nine and have never werked, and live with them, no bux despite my good behavior and higher education than these boomers that have had a dozen jobs each and yet get checks after losing their parental rights.
>government gives me food though so I can be too fat to gf it up and or walk to look for work for miles in the heat of fucking FL of all shitholes to spawn
>takes twenty-one months in between requests for court date to get on the bux
>even if get bux they'll probably not give me enough to live on my own due to living with parents and even if they do they'll likely make it impossible to switch areas from my extremely shitty county, and state
Thanks system, ur great.

Attached: 1423027429732.jpg (250x235, 14K)

>ctrl+f 'single mother'
>no results
Legitimately surprised.

mom
>normie with no interests other than netflix/shopping
>anger issues; she sometimes walks into rooms with this look like she's searching for something to bitch about
>"Be civil? Civility is a luxury for rich people"
>shouts at 9yo imouto and is surprised and pissed off when she cries
>slept with a knife under my pillow in 6th grade because I was legitimately worried she'd kill me for getting bad grades

dad
>I don't know, from what I hear he sounds textbook antisocial personality
>performed black market abortions in the soviet union until his arrest
>eventually got an actual education in medicine and became an anesthesiologist

My grandfather was the only real role model in my life and family member whom I really respected. I don't think I realized how important to me he was when he died when I was 12. I think I only really recovered in my mid-20's.

underrated post

I think like that sometimes, but then I realize I was fully aware of my situation throughout puberty and the later teens and it was my responsibility as a self aware human, just as it's my responsibility now. Maybe I can blame my parents for the way they raised me as a young child, or for my inherited personality or whatnot, but for the most part it's my fault.

Oh and having my circumcised is something that is without question their fault.

mother also on the bux*

forgot to add that, to clarify

She got it after waling in court about her having lost her kids.

>I ruined my children's lives and knew bette than having kids, waaaahhhhh

>gets bux

To clarify, being sardonic about what she cried about, but still, yeah.

Well when I told my psychiatrist about what ive been through because of family issues she cried for 5 min or so nonstop
You can imagine what kinda shit. Its like JUST BUST MY SHIT UP: the life
I think god only put me on earth to be that one lost soul, the guy soccer moms point to and tell their children "u need to stay in school or ur gonna end up like him"

Agreed, in fact I don't blame them. I just think that they if they pushed me, then maybe I woudln't be this
pathetic mess that I am. Or at least I'd be a bit better than what I currently am. On the other hand though,
you'd think that parents of a teen who's showing interest in nothing other than video games would be worried
and pushy to get him to do shit. Mine stopped at the worrying. Now of course this could be because they did
not want to force me to do stuff that I didn't want to, such as going out with friends but in this case I think they
should've pushed me.

>dad is a violent schizophrenic paedophile from a rough city
>my mum was also violent
>parents moved from Manchester to Taunton in 1981 because racist
>had my sister in '89 and me in '92
>used to beat me, lock me in cupboards and wash mouth out with soap when I was as young as 3
>had to watch and sometimes get caught inbetween parents physical fighting
>mum and dad divorced in '95
>mum took me and sister to Manchester women and childrens home
>met a guy called Frank
>he used to beat me and my sister, swung us by our ears until they bled
>dad found us and took us to Exeter
>sexually abused me, physically abused me, mentally abused me and verbally abused me
>used to go crazy a lot, heavy drinker. extremely violent
>dropped sister off at cop station in June of '97
>I'm with this crazy bastard until late '98
>go into care
>am withdrawn
>I molested kids when I was a kid (even living with my dad)
>my foster dad cheated on my foster mum so there were a lot of fights there
>foster dad has punched me on occasion
>I tried to fuck foster sister
>killed her hamsters and a dog
>pyromaniac
>thought about mass murder a lot
>thief
>vandal
>I attempted burglary once
>zoophillia
>foster dad rinsed my mum out of 30,000 quid in October and the resulting animosity between them made me fucking worried

I won't talk too badly of the people who took me in and cared for me for the past 20 years. But as you can see at least my birth dad bonded with me more than my foster dad and wasn't a beta. My foster dad does have a short fuse though. And my parents argue about the smallest things.

I love my foster carers. But damn the matriarchy

All people are products of their environment, no one chooses nature vs nurture and those two things make you who you are. You cannot change who you are, and if you were to change, an external force would have to do it, not you.

Faggots.

It we pushed ourselves we wouldn't be such a mess, or maybe we would. We are aware of a problem and can push ourselves now, that is what counts.

I was only trying to help man, and so what you're telling me is I'm like this forever?
Is the "external force" meds?

Yeah, problem is I don't have the discipline nor the motivation to do it.

Drugs just make you feel different, unless it's some ADD shit, then you get put on essentially meth to help you become less disciplined with concentration.

No it is not meds. It's a whip on your back and water boarding meant to turn you into a dog to do your master's bidding. Other than that, you cannot change a person much.

Idiot.

I feel the same most of the time, but some days I feel a fire and try my best. I want to keep the fire going all the time. I'm trying to convince myself as much as I'm trying to convince you, maybe more so.

That wojak is really scary, pls dont post it now Im scared

Also yeah my father was never there and my parents just tried to use me as a weapon against eachother throughout their divorce, my moms a good parent now though

Attached: F6844944-38E0-4A2D-89BD-57C7FA053E8D.jpg (400x400, 41K)

Lol post how your parents fucked you up. This should be good.

Oh but I already did user it's and Now fuck off and die.

Attached: 1423332818446.jpg (625x626, 305K)

My family has a shit ton of issues, I have a shit ton of inherent issues (not sure if bpd, aspergers, schizo etc never been to a psych)

Tldr
Mom got her shit JUST'd throughout her entire life. Poor as shit to the point of starvation until she was old enough to work alongside her four brothers (two brothers and two sisters to be more specific). All of them except my uncle were pieces of shit to some degree, and also found out recently grandparents were also shitheads, especially grandma. Never got to meet grand dad. Died when I was about six. All uncles/aunts on mom's side are basically poor, lazy, religious zealots except one who as I said was he ok uncle. The other brother has lived through heart attacks and two strokes somehow despite being obese. Also im fairly sure hes a pedo. also mom is borderline illiterate. And i have a brother who hates me because she left where she lived leaving him with his dad because his mother was basically satan himself according to my mom lol. And for god knows why my mom never really told my brother what happened. In his eyes he thinks she just went "ktybye" and left. So mom came over to the state im living in, met my dad and a few years later they had me. Problem is my dad is also a massive piece of shit in many ways and used to beat me and my mom but especially my mom when I was younger. One time when I was about seven he got on top of her and started choking her. Pretty sure he was gonna kill her lol. Anyway I had to call he cops they came over nothing happened.

So my dad is also a piece of shit like I said. He was kinda spoiled and from the little I know from mom he also used to be a little shit when younger, and gave his mom a lot of trouble. He never had a formal job, always worked for the government, never went to college, then the public bank he worked at got sold to the private sector and he was laid out, and hes basically been bouncing off shitty jobs since then. Comment 2 long rip. Tip of the iceberg basically.

My family is a bunch of freaks and I come from a long lineage of criminals and nutcases. I was fucked from the get go friendo.

Attached: 1510808380537.jpg (1100x1100, 437K)

ITT: privileged first worlders making shit up for attention
Get a grip you faggots. No one but yourselves are in control of your lives. Just go out there and live life. Just be yourselves

Wow wtf is this. I had a normal, healthy family. I thought r9k having shitty families was a meme. How have you guys not murdered your families yet. I know I would've.

Psychologists low key come to Jow Forums to study this cesspool.

You don't have to be mean. Was just trying to give you a 'fragment of hope' that sounded less insensitive (imo) than the other reply. But I guess you disliked them both equally. Oh well.

Telling people on the Jow Forums that it can get better is full retard, retard.

Go back to where you came from if you expect a safe place here.

And don't forget to kill yourself on the way out for trespassing here aids blood infested normalfaggot cum gargling faggot.

Attached: 1488133415439.gif (259x194, 78K)

>accidentally used faggot twice in the same sentence
Sounds bad, pretend it didn't happen.

>normal cum gargling faggot
or
>cum gargling normalfaggot

Would have been fine.

Sigh. Cannot even tink anymore.

I'm also a robot. But I'll admit I tried resisting Jow Forums for a while and I guess I haven't fully adapted to the culture of the board again 'where life is shit and it will always be shit, so we will sit in our own shit instead of helping each other'

My mom used to bring her female model friends over to molest me and suck my dick. It was horrible

Lololol do you honestly expect to be able to change someone's life even if slightly just by saying positive things over the internet?

>worst life in thread
>abused by 3 plus parental figures and society
>no pls respon

;_;

>worst life ever
>killed animals
Nope

i was nice to my girlfriend online and she moved continents to be with me.

Do I believe that I could change the way how someone sees things by one discussion, even if slightly? Yes. This might change your day it might not. It changed my day. Everything changes my day. I guess since my day rarely changes these small things affect me, so I'm only seeing things from my eyes.

>Everything changes my day. I guess since my day rarely changes

Error, but I think you get what I'm trying to say.

He's a fucking cunt and hates women to blame it on them.

Literally worst type of person that is earning everything that happened to him.

He deserves no reply.

Jesus. Sounds rough, user. Something similar happened to me.

>the only reply to my post was my own samefag post
FUCKING PLEASE RESPOND

More like my entire family was dysfunctional.
Mostly my mother i have to thank for the years of abuse and no doubt i inherited her evil spirit and probably her shizophrenia too.
I hate this gay earth and this shitty hand ive been delt but the one thing that keeps me going are my dads words before he died.
>Never Give Up, Never Surrender Keep Fighting Until You Win

Will do dad but that doesnt mean ill win

just because you got the shit beaten out of you and had a shit life doesn't justify the horrible things you've done. your life isn't the worst out there, it isn't even close, and you won't ever achieve anything either.

you're pathetic and you deserve to be remembered that way

These are data mining threads. Jow Forums is a science project.
>inb4 paranoia

Same dude. My father is the only one who actually cares about me.

I'm not the guy I was replying to but thanks

whoops. sorry my oregano dude. i'm sure ur ok

My parents are wonderful people who have given so much to me. And while most of my current situation is of my own decisions, I think my upbringing played a role in who I am.

Mostly, that my father was very absent. Working overtime and spending weekends at his parents farm, working more. I don't remember doing anything with him. I was the last guy to learn about sex, how to shave, how to throw a ball, etc. As such, I was always out of the loop and poor at sports which is a big thing for young boys to make friendships over.

On the other end of the spectrum, I had a homemaker mother who smothered and sheltered me. She is an angel, but it's not good for a boy whose becoming a man. She taught me never to drink, smoke or do anything that has any kind of risk or frivolous spending. Not even allowed to ride a bike without a helmet or walk around in the evenings with the few friends I had.

Which brings me to the last, my parents were very thrifty with certain things. So I never had a cell phone to communicate and text with the other kids until Grade 10 (this was in 2012), never had a car to drive around. They also didn't want me to get a job and just focus on school which I excelled at. Top marks in my class of 200 students.

Then I dropped out senior year due to clinical depression, finished my classes up online and have been a neet suffering with depression since. My social skills and wellbeing degrade each passing day. My older sisters are a dentist and a actuary both making well over six figure incomes. My parents always instilled great values and provided an environment to succeed. It worked for them. I just floundered.

I had a great childhood but past that, I never feel like I've been alive. I never formed into a man. Every day that passes, suicide seems like less and less of an option and more of an inevitability.

Sorry for the giant wall of text.

Attached: Wojak120.png (1000x1144, 186K)

Sorry to hear that man. Absent dad and sheltering mom is a killer combo. I can relate. I'm even worse in that regard if that makes you feel better. Even after growing up I'm still pretty clueless, especially considering i have social anxiety and rarely go outside. The "wasted potential" part fucks me up too.

When I was 10 or so my dad got deployed to Afghanistan, and my mom decided to move back home for the year. My mom basically dumped me and my sister with my grandma. She was always out, always gone. Well, one day at like 3am I went downstairs to her room and caught her fucking some guy. She begged me not to tell and offered to buy me a soccer jersey I had wanted. I accepted, not really knowing what was happening. She would hit me and tell me she was gonna kill herself if I ever told my dad what had happened. So, I stayed quiet. A few years later my dad had found out and he was heartbroken, and he asked if I knew. I tried to tell him I didnt but he knew that was bullshit and it left our relationship strained. Not too much later my dad died from a heart attack and our relationship was never the same.I hated my mom for manipulating me and making my life shitty. This was the beginning of my hate for people.

Attached: 1fb.png (600x583, 340K)

I spend almost 90% of my waking time online in a constant state of escapism. I've been a neet for 6 years now but I've never really thought about it. I've just been in this state of melancholy, doing nothing. And time passes by so quick when all you do is sleep and spend time on the internet. Years have just slipped through my fingers.

I fear I've also become stupid from my lack of educated now, doing nothing for all these years. I don't catch onto things like I use to and my focus is easy broken.

I know I could change and I want to, but it's like I just lack any will and energy to do so. I'm just a person caught in quicksand, slowly sinking. It's a bit comforting knowing others are facing the same, though I wouldn't wish it on anyone.