Actual Self Improvement Thread

he's an advice, go out and fucking learn how to socialize instead of looking for the simple trick

I used online dating to get a number of girls. That's always on the table if you're too bored/lazy/busy to go outside. Tinder, POF, OkCupid, and Meetme are all good apps I'd recommend.

That's like saying to get fit you just need to lift weights with no instruction on how to do anything. You just start injuring yourself cause you don't know the proper form.

nah its not like that at all... that a dumb comparison.

there is a bunch of shy people out there whom you can easily start learning, also there many Chads, you actually like being around robots so you could learn from them too.

just stop crying and start talking to fucking people, otherwise you will never improve.

But those never go well for people in Jow Forums. They're literally where the 80/20 theory is the strongest.

You never know the results until you actually try. Not everyone on r9k is the same person, everyone has different results. Just post a good description, some good pictures, and know how to make your face look good and you're ay-okay.

I used to be super awkward, like never talking unless I was making 9/11 and cutting/suicide jokes to people who really didn't want to hear that. I'm still awkward, but I'm way better at talking to people now. Social skills really are skills. Even if it sucks dick, the normies are right, if you put yourself out there, eventually you'll get the hang of it.

As for girls, just like anyone else, they just want someone who they admire to care about them. Just find little ways to show them you care, like remembering little inside jokes or stories or complimenting them on the things they are proud of. And if they don't feel the same way, that's a shame, but it's not you, it's that you and the girl aren't compatible. There's probably someone out there for you.

Also, don't be so hard on yourself. You don't have to be some suave gentleman or do everything right to have a relationship, you just have to listen to her signals and communicate your feelings and try to make it work. I have a friend who starting dating a girl after they just talked about Marvel movies for awhile. I think a lot of people here project their insecurities onto girls, when the girls don't have those unrealistic expectations. I know people say it's pretentious as hell, but "Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind" really hits this point home and really helped me out when I was in a dark place.

I'm a KHV who recently finally got a real girlfriend and is trying to turn that all around. I know this is r9k and we're in the middle of an incel uprising or whatever, but if you want anymore advice I'd be more than happy to share my thoughts

Also, I LOVE virgin vs chad memes, but that kind of mindset that gets thrown around here a lot is really toxic. Real confidence is realizing there is no scale with which society can measure your worth. You can exist simply for the joy of existing.

I'm sorry if that's cheesy, I'm a little drunk. I wish you the best of luck in all your endevours fellow robot

Get passionate about shit. Find a hobby you think is cool and dive in headfirst. Preferably something creative and/or active. Get excited about this stuff. Working on shit and and making progress and fucking up and learning and all that mess. That's the shit that makes people interesting. And yeah that goes a long way towards making someone more attractive. maybe the activity puts you in proximity to cute people and shit progresses naturally from there, or maybe it's just one more thing to talk about with people on tinder.

There's doesn't of graphs that show how low your chances are of getting a match. I'd hate to say it, but this is pretty much boomer tier advice giving.

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If you tried going out and asking girls irl you'd be getting near the same rates as well. So, which is your pick? The easier, swipe right every girl until you get a match, which might take 3 days at the very most, or the harder, which is going out and talking to random girls which might take weeks until you find one who will actually look you in the eye?

Going out is way better. That's not even debatable. In fact online dating sites like OK Cupid and Tinder are the reason Incels are a thing right now rather than before.

And how is it better? Is there any reason behind this or are you just saying that because it's what others say? Take into consideration that going out is entirely possible once you meet someone on a dating app.
And no, it's people willingly wanting to isolate themselves from society that makes them incels. Autists existed before the internet, the only difference is that they couldn't escape from it. Cheap instant gratification is what turns the autist away from a society that takes effort in finding someone.

I feel like this works, but it's not the exciting part that will get the girl, but rather how you are being successful and happy about something. Not to mention having a hobby does slowly bring you to new people.

>Cheap instant gratification is what turns the autist away from a society that takes effort in finding someone.

Get your head out of your ass bro. It doesn't matter if they leave the basement and go woman hunting, woman share the best men, inevitably some guys are gonna get left out. Its just the way it goes.

Right, because you can see the future and dictate that someone will have no chance on an online dating app, despite your own statistics saying that the chances are above a 0%. You're basically not even reading your evidence at this point.

True, but we can't just leave people out. We have to think of some sort of solution

REAL TIPS POST

There's golden rules for just about everything that if you follow will improve your life in general.

>How to dress
Get your measurements, measuring tape is like $2 on Amazon
wear an athletic cut shirt that FITS
bottom of shirt should fall on belt, should seams should be on top of the shoulders.
If wearing shorts you want the bottom to be over half of your knee, not fully covering or above.
Get some shoe elevators if you're short

Find a haircut that suits you. Google face shapes, find yours, there's a guide to beards and haircuts to make you look taller, look like you have a stronger jaw, etc

>Health
Having a basic men'smulti is nice to round out your diet, you almost certainly won't need any other supplement unless you're some retard vegan

I'm too lazy to add more shit but legit dudes just fucking google or youtube "HOW TO ______" and there will be a brief 5 minute video somewhere that will tell you all you need to know about anything

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yeah i'd say that's fair

Self improvement is a fucking meme, it doesn't matter how many times you try to self improve if your head is fucked there's no going back. The only advice for robots is to lash out or kill themselves.

/asp/ here to help you betas out. Quit looking like a short order cook from a Pikeville Waffle House.

>Gain height
>Take a shower
>Hit the weights
>Get a clue

Fuck. Botched it and blew out my quad.

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How do I go to the Barber and asking him to give me the Hitler Youth haircut without telling him I want a Hitler Youth haircut?

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You don't get it. Its literally impossible for all men to have a significant other in a sexually liberated society, because woman share the alpha males. This balances out as each generation ages and settling down becomes a priority, but this still means that a lot of men will go through horrible droughts during their youth, and its no coincidence that most of these guys going nuts are in their 20s. Like it or not, somebody is going postal and shooting shit up.

>Jow Forums memes
You think getting fit is a meme?
It's like the best thing you can do to make yourself desirable.

I'm not saying that there are or aren't men that can't find girlfriends despite any efforts they make, what I'm saying is retarded is you dictating that people here can't find a girlfriend no matter what they do despite knowing absolutely nothing about their personal lives nor on how they look. Let people actually fucking try something before you go on an autistic rage as to why they shouldn't, especially when it would benefit them so much more if they made an opinion for themselves.

of all the pictures to use for that question and you go with a guy wearing a hat

Sorry I am on my phone on the toilet at work

And I just wasted trips god fucking damn it
Maybe I will just straight up ask for a Hitler Youth haircut.

you rite, you rite

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It works for some robots, but very few. It doesn't change your facial structure of other genetic flaws that have nothing to do with muscle. Not to mention how many robots fail to keep up and becoming more depressed. There's occasionally people. Also a lot of robots think that they can lift for Stacy only to be rejected anyways.

Getting Jow Forums isnt for getting girls. Just for staying healthy and having a hobby.

Making excuses to not improve yourself is what's keeping you down.
You wanna make yourself desirable? Stop making excuses

I straight up talk to some girls that follow me or I follow either on snap or tinder matches. Rarely any of them ever reply.

What the fuck am I doing wrong? AM i too straightforward? Too direct? This doesnt usually happen irl but goddamn I want to get some fucking nudes

Where did I say not to self improve? I said you should stay Jow Forums, but not for the sake of getting girls because that literally doesn't work.

Thats what be yourself is supposed to cover. Socialization comes naturally to normies and is a simple part of life (as opposed to a challenge to overcome). They cant really explain it because they just acted on instinct since childhood.

They say be yourself because they figure anyone who cannot socialize is purposely avoiding it, because it comes so natural to them.

Seriously, ive gotten ass grabbed, thigh grabbed, creep pics on the subway, roasties talking about me and turning their heads to see me. Yet I try to initiate a convo on snap and tinder. Fucking nothing unless they were familiar or already knew me somehow

Fit and boomer type advice is really only thing that works.

There are not tricks or shortcuts in life or love. You want something you gotta work hard and have dedication. Not be a faggot looking for a magic backdoor that'll trick the universe into getting everything you want.

You want a fat chick? Be confident. Be available.

You want an average girl? Be funny. Be confident. Be a provider.

You want a babe? Be good looking. Be confident. Be a provider. Be fun.

The only way to achieve most of these things is through hard work and experience. Go to the fucken gym, watch what you eat, don't have autistic hobbies, make the most of your spare time, go to clubs, get hobbies.
Unless youve been doing this stuff since birth like most normal people then its really hard work. If youre doing drugs, masturbating and playing videogames daily and thats all there is to you,there's not much hope.

Best advice is fresh start. Take a long trip somewhere far away for a long time and change who you are get away from all the old habits of the past.

No.youre just a lazy cunt. Just get the fuck up and do something. Find a reason to do something and do it. If you don't have a reason to motivate you then youre stagnant and need to leave everything youre currently doing and start again.

Getting girls should not be the primary goal, just a bonus...
The primary goal should be getting happy with yourself or something like that.

I dont think people should lift for women. Who the fuck does that? But saying it doesnt help you at all is insane.

For starters, it helped me with anxiety and confidence in general. It also helped with looks in a big way. I dont think id attract as much people as I do if i didnt begin lifting at all

Im in more or less of the same boat as you life-wise and I mean no offense (especially cuz ur drunk) but this really reads a lot like normie writing, and sounds a LOT like bait.

Dont bullshit him with theres someone out there for you and showing girls you care. Theres only someone out there for him if he goes and improves his social status. He should do those show you care things to everyone, its part of the book How to Win Friends and Influence people. If anything he should be less caring with women.

Saying you live virgin chad memes but calling the rest of it toxic reeks of normalfaggotry. You sound like a girl pretending shes into a nerd hobby for attention and belonging.

Thats the shortest fucken excuse I've ever heard. I don't lift weights because I haven't done a six week course on correct posture first. Its not that fuckenhard. Just lift some weights faggot. Start light. If you get injured. Thats part of it you lay off for a weeks and do something else then you get back to it.

How hard is it to do something pushups. Just do 200 a day in sets of 20

Jow Forumsizen OP of the other thread that the angry aspies despise. Some of you boys are giving out great advice. Super proud.

My girl broke up with me after I went out my way to spoil her and treat her good as much as I could. She made me extremely happy but she went through a bout of depression and I wasn't there for her when I needed to and she left me. I've lost my best friend and I genuinely don't know how to get over her because it's very apparent I like her more than she likes me and that hurts bad. She says she wants to be friends and all that but she never attempts any conversation and it hurts to see her post anything. In a few weeks I'm heading back home to see an old ex girlfriend of mine and we're gonna bang each other's brains out and do couple stuff without a couple label.

How else do I get over this chick because I'm at a loss.

That just doesn't work. On social media you're nothing but a fan to bitches.

Stop thinking about her at all thats all. Bothered by her posting shit on Facebook? Close it. Treat it like a drug.

The pain and the need to take it goes away once youve learned to free yourself from it

Don't be friends. There's no point. You only offer that option when you think the other person is too weak to handle a clean break.

Don't talk to her. Don't be friends. No matter how tempting it is. Just remember. This too shall pass. Youre gonna hurt for a few weeks, maybe even months but eventually you'll get over it. Just focus on things in front of you. Work, study, exercise and mates. Go travelling if you can. But don't contact her.
Yeah bang the ex, just don't seek comfort and get a rebound girl that quick.
Just keep reminding yourself this too shall pass.

Not even tinder? I feel like chatting back to this classmate of mine whom I drunk chatted with. I wanted to talk to her tonight as she looked dismal by me talking with another girl but I think the same shit will happen much like the other girls

General question: Why does r9k get so upset when mentioning going to a community college? Unless your parents hate you, there is no reason they won't be happy and possibly offer help to the worst of NEETs.
Social anxiety? You don't really have to talk to anyone at a community college except during group projects. However, most of the time you can get paired with old people who are past normie shit.
Money? FAFSA is piss easy for the poorest of people. $5k to use however you like. California actually has a free year of CC for some first time students.
Brainlet? Again, any loving parent will be patient if you try to give it a shot. Despite what you may think, being able to write a coherent sentence on r9k is miles above your average CC student.
So I again I ask, why is CC so looked down upon?

The Jow Forums and boomer type advice is extremely out of touch to say the least. Welcome to the twenty first century. Where you have to work smarter, not harder. Otherwise you'll end up being a registered sex offender before you actually improve. We need real strategies.

MAKE MONEY
MAKE MONEY
AND MAKE MONEY!!!

every delusional robot here brags about how smart they are

well apply it to something useful and MAKE FUCKING MONEY!! that is all a man needs

also there is nothing better of money slavering, you give the bitch pure luxuries, a nice place, traveling, rides in nice cars, gourmet food, expensive clothes, etc... and that night when the bitch doesn't want to suck your dick you have just to say this magic words "please leave my house tomorrow" and then she will deepthroat you and you will came into her esophagus

Because most NEETs here have no real problems and are just lazy excuse seeking children who applaud their own laziness as a factor of their genius and community college is beneath them.

Don't sweat it, most of the faggots here who continually shoot down advice from good meaning people here daily and insult whoever gives it will eventually be a minimum wage stooge at 50 who still had big dreams and wishes he could start over and never amount to anything until they eventually shoot themselves.

You're thristy and women can tell. Focus on improving yourself before chasing pussy out of your league. And yes, women have it much easier. Tough tits.

This board is full of delusional aspies that literally lie on the internet. You really trust theyre smart? Lmaoooo

I would ask for advice but I think I'm fucked. My entire body is scarred from cystic acne caused by one of my anxiety medications that I was on years ago. I became a recluse for 3 years until I was hospitalized. I don't know if I can stand being a freak anymore.

I am sure most of the robots are smarter than the average normie

but they lack the motivation to apply their brain into something useful that provides them $$$

It makes me sad that this is most likely true. Obviously your first few jobs are going to be ass, but I used that as inspiration to not end up like lifetime cashiers. Pride is bullshit, but I guess my parents were right when saying kids think they know everything when they're young

Thats a bullshit excuse. Youre looking for excuses, thats all.
Stop saying strategies and all these buzzwords. Just get fit, get a good job, get some interesting hobbies youre passionate about, read a few books and articles and then just say hi my name is user to a few chicks. Either they respond and you keep going or they don't and you leave. Its not hard. Stop looking for fucken excuses to explain your shit attitude.

If you dont wake up in the morning and say fuck i was so stupid yesterday, i shouldve done things differently - you havent grown

Yeah exactly. Everyone's first few jobs suck. These faggots here just wanna go straight to the top. They are no different to the kardashian watching tweens who wanna be useless rich celebrities when they grow up and refuse to work for it.

I figured that these dudes from r9k dont want to work. For anything. They think that they should get shit handed to them. Life doesnt work that way and theyll see in 10 years when theyre working min wage cashier or fucking bagging jobs that nothing comes free.

basic social skills

I sometimes dont even want a fuck though? Just want to have a conversation because ive done it with women who I considered unattractive and still zilt.

And considering how women often look at me and even hit on me or shit have matched me, I wouldnt say theyre out of my league.

Jesus Christ mate they can smell the desperation on you. This ain't 2014, chicks don't just send nudes to strangers anymore.

Quit being a creepy little centipede and just go out for coffee with the girls first.

On social media you're always actively competing with at least 10 guys. IRL a girl can only focus on one guy, big difference. Social media and phones convos should be for setting up a date as soon as possible, otherwise you're just feeding her validation.

Legit a couple of thots have sent me nudes. im the op of the previous thread and that girl in the first post just bam nude at 3am

I've personally made a flowchart and small talk algorithm that allows me to discuss about 50 different scenarios with people. Usable in most places. I can share if you guys want.

Fuck man I appreciate this. Been feeling this whole time like she's just been playing around with me. Thanks for that genuinely helped.

Fuck that noise. I can atg 225# for reps, my 1rm for deadlift is about to hit 4 plates (405#), and I can plank for...well, for fucking ever. Doesn't mean jack shit. I'm short and bald, meaning all lifting has done is make me jacked, short and bald. I have fucking lost count of all the taller, noodle-armed guys I've seen in coffee shops and restaurants with reasonably attractive women rubbing the backs of their heads, holding their hands and pulling in their faces for a kiss. GTFO out of here with that lifting bullshit, it just makes (you) strong. That's it.

>altering your personality to be more attractive, nothing to really teach you how to socialize.
This user is correct. My inability to connect with other people is my biggest flaw. It has ruined my life and I know that will never change.

YES!!!! SOUNDS GREAT!!!!!

The best thing to make yourself desirable is to improve your social status. Unless you have god tier genetics, having a nice body and working at a dead end job is unlikely to get the pussy wet.

I am interested please do share with us user

Thats great mate. But if thats all youre getting what's the point? A couple of dumb gangers here and there might send a sexy pic once in awhile but when you just start chasing that solely. When that becomes your goal or perversion chicks can sense something is off in you. Ease back a bit on it.

Just google a picture of the haircut that you want, dumbass.

Guides are bullshit. Most of the time the way to overcome your issues is dedication and patience.
You're a fat fuck? Well get to exercising and lose the weight.
Can't find a job? Get your ass to school, graduate, and apply. You may have to take a few bullshit low paying jobs to improve your resume.
No girl? Of course not, you havent improved yourself.
There is no guide to improve personality because its not an easy answer.

No worries mate, all been there before. It passes thats all you gotta remember.

>Seriously, ive gotten ass grabbed, thigh grabbed, creep pics on the subway, roasties talking about me and turning their heads to see me.
Why are you here, chad?

1. Be white
2. Be not asian

>fellow robot
Stopped reading there. kys normie

Youre acting like if I was like that irl. Im not. Its easier to do so because its anonymous. Hmmm I am starting to think girls are just anxious.

I just want more frens and a gf ;-;

Yeah same here brah but damn, I want to get some more

Unless this is a Chadder guy were talking about that would make sense. But otherwise im competing against beta ray bill and the other incel orbiters. Youre spot on about feeding their validation though, I avoid doing so unless I want to fool them

well yeah that was where you stopped reading. those were the last two words

Oh lmao u missunderstood. I wanted to say that nowadays if girls want ur attention/to fuck you theyll just send a pic at 4am with a "u up?" caption

How new is this guy?

Uh huh. And have you fucked any of these girls? What's the problem then exactly? I'm telling you talking to a virtual girl and talking to people in real life are completely different mate. You are basically a good looking sweaty troll at this point. Sure. Online its hard to hard but away from the keyboard chicks can just just tell man.

Ease up on the perversions a bit. The fifty shades shit doesn't actually work except on std goth chicks and saber tooth's.

So what's the problem then? Youre upset because your hit rate isn't 100% how insecure are you?
Of course most girls won't reply, you're never as good as you think are. Just be happy you're getting a few nudes here and there and quit being such an egomaniac.

Not him but stuff like that pisses me off in the worst way

I can be quiet sometimes but I really fucking hate people giving the silent treatment. Both girls and dudes.

Its strangers on Tinder. Quit being insecure. Nobody owes you words. Just move on with your life.

It aint just Tinder senpai. Youre terrible at giving advice.

I dont even know why I came to express my repressed narcissism here

You want my advice?
Stop chasing women.
That girl you have a crush on? Stop giving her all your attention.
Your female coworker who you find cute? Stop picking up her slack at work and call her out for being a lazy slut

You want women to be interested in you? Don't be interested in them. They literally thrive on attention and when they don't get it, they want it from someone so badly that they'll start doing whatever they can to get it. Just always remember to never give them your full attention or actually care about them fully. They don't know what they actually want from you and are just there to be a hole to fuck.

There you go.

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If anyone needs specific advice, I'm a cute girl (former fuggo) that can help.