My dorm is having an open mic night in the main lounge...I was thinking of doing

some stand up comedy. Will you guys rate my jokes so far. Ive been working on them for a little while, the open mic night is not until May 5th.


jokes:

What do you call a girl who has sex on the first date?
A girl I need to go on a date with


What do you call a guy who likes to party and enjoys drinking beers?
A guy that I need to party with

What do you call an angry Charlie Sheen?
Charlie Mean


What did the cast of Home Improvement call Tim Allen when he was being a grouch?
Tim the Cruel man Taylor

What did Simba say when he learned he would be King of The Jungle?
Are rafiki kidding me?

Attached: 1505539105874.gif (60x95, 24K)

Do it. This is comedy gold!

Attached: 1450226583028.jpg (251x242, 12K)

Fucking terrible. I hope this is a troll

Show us your material then, you pathetic cuckiddoodle doo.

I'm laughing hard right now. lmao

What's deaf and blind, but only see's and hear's white?
Men in blue!

oofed

fukkin checked mate

What do you call a guy that lets black men fuck his wife or girlfriend?

White!

What do you call a guy who cheats with your wife?

Black..

... and blue!

I like that one..

You know what's the best thing about dead baby jokes? They never get old!

what do you call the guy currently holding the mic?
a faggot

And what do you call the guy watching it happen?

You're just gonna get scoffed at, user.
Save yourself the embarrassment.

What's half Black, half White and smells like shit?
A spic

What do call a person that loves Mexican food, vacations in Mexico, has Mexican workers but loves Trump?

..A ''''''white ''''''American!'''''

It isn't necrophilia until they shit themselves

use this user

Attached: 12932732_1211946082156776_3209420691671220549_n.jpg (540x960, 43K)

these are actually funny to read, but I doubt you'll get a good reaction from a crowd.

Yeah good but turn the jokes into stories

Heh Heh heh ever see a girl and your eyes just pop out your head like AWOOGA AWOOGA. Lemme tell you something, these broads that get frisky with a guy on a first date, count me in. You, yeah you in the front row, heavens to Betsy wanna get a drink after the show, c'mon luck be a lady tonight.

Yeah use this one and do an incel routine as well

these jokes are so awful only drunk 90 IQ stacies would laugh at them

Your jokes are irredeemably lame, but it'd be pretty funny to know that you actually stood in front of a crowd and told them