I'm just about done. It's been 5 months, I'm still an empty wreck of a person. I can't do this anymore, nothing brings me any enjoyment, nothing takes my mind off things. I thought maybe I could make it to October and escape into Red Dead Redemption II, but I don't think I have it in me, lads, I just don't...
I can't move on, being with other women just reminds me of her, and I can't stop feeling guilty and full of hate when I'm with someone new. They're not her, I don't want to talk to them or be with them, and I can't force myself to do so.
She doesn't care, she just moved on, doesn't even talk to me anymore. I put a year into that girl, gave her a year of my time, loyalty and attention and after it all she just walked. Everything reminds me of her. I cry several times a day, I hadn't cried since I was a child until I met her, tears just start rolling down my face as I stare at a wall. I'm already dead, I just constantly think about ending it, it's the only thing that makes me feel anything anymore.
This community is the only thing that has brought me any kind of joy since we broke up, and it truly warmed my heart and at fleeting moments took my mind off her. I thank you all for that, I feel a bond with you, you're like my brothers and I wish there was something I could do to pay you all back.
Please stay away from women, robots. We're not built to be with them.
I fucking love you, Jow Forums. Godspeed, robots.