'Mirin thread

>fucking titcow missionary
>she pulls me in with her legs and wraps around me like a python
>feels me up
>rubs all over back muscles
>"you like feeling my strong back bby"
>"yes papi"
>mfw I remember she is a 4/10 mexican gorda

Attached: doubt.gif (550x312, 1.96M)

no they're scottish

wow gender really is a social construct haha

You sound like you need to be beaten

bump

wow you need to chill out with your toxic masculinity

best my dick

Did he airbrush his ass? Does he wax his ass and legs? Is he that feminine as to have no hair?

This is the most homo thing I've seen in a while(no homo).

>yanks trying to tell me about people from my country
okay mate

>used to be nogainz skeleton
>driving
>notice that arms getting bigger
>mirin' myself
>not paying attention
>rear end guy in front of me

Guy was cool and I paid him off

alright guys, this is a big one for me, happened just now, here goes...

>up until 2 years ago, have awesome body from ~3 years of lifting
>eventually get gf, gradually let myself go
>we break up a year ago, i sink into depression
>body gets even worse
>needless to say i haven't got remotely mired in AGES
>gained 15kg while losing lots of muscle
>look like a puffy piece of shit
>a month ago decide to get it together, return to the Jow Forums ways
>work out 5-6 days a week
>already drop 4kg (mostly water, i know)
>upper abs suddenly visible under good lighting
>best part is that my face is no longer puffy
>looking less like seth rogan and more like a man should look
>working out at the gym just now
>some 7/10 girl starts asking me dumb question
>she's obviously trying to flirt but i'm not entirely sure
>either way she's not hot enough for me to give her my attention
>continue my workout after politely answering her question
>see her sitting aroung the gym >bar with some young milf
>an hour later see milf standing right in front of me
>"excuse me, are you single? i'd like you to meet someone"
>w-wat
>other girl from before jumps in
>"we just talked about you being hot"
>"yeah, very handsome too. are you single?"
>drop my spaghetti and continue working out
th-thanks Jow Forums. it really is amazing what a single month can do.

oh and the best part is that after i mumbled something about not being 100% single (autismo):

>the young milf walks out the gym
>shouts "let me know when you're single!"
>guys around me start laughing

>toxic masculinity

Attached: 1515767772046.png (183x189, 81K)

>last wednesday
>waiting for lecture to start like usual, each table has two seats
>my classmates in front of me and my table buddy always turn around to talk to us
>female (female) classmate starts telling how she was at a party with her bf(male)
>said she wasn't expecting her bf to be able to do the worm because he doesn't have arm muscles as me (he's skinny fat iirc)
>I'm DYEL
>feels good man

>get haircut
>qt thinn tall haircut girl presses her body against me

Oh she knew what she was doing, people notice when they're touching someone

Attached: E93.jpg (585x584, 24K)

Heheheh. Worried this will be me in a few months tho.

lol. fucking mexicans

based lad.

>y-you too

>be fatty in high school
>think I’m hot shit and always ask girls on dates
>get denied because of my high intellect
>lose 65 pounds, start lifting
>see High school girls, 4 years later
>All are fat and used up
>”user how did you get so fit?”
>”who are you?”
Greatest moment in my life

>also get haircut
>another place because usual men's is full and clsoed
>a milf comes in and talks to my hairdresser
>"so how's your day?"
>"well now it's a bit better"
>"oh yes I see"
hopefully that was about me

Attached: 1513786830900.jpg (339x360, 30K)

What's the one were the mum admits to mirin her son?

Attached: 1449575734605.png (634x697, 115K)

>>female (female) classmate starts telling how she was at a party with her bf(male)
wat? Is this a new meme?

>tfw most of my mire stories were because of face

Attached: 50a.jpg (470x595, 201K)

Based.

my good man, i do this too

Attached: 1433704200892.png (198x225, 23K)

livin the dream

Attached: Living the Smug life.jpg (1280x720, 136K)

Fuck I need to step up the game, I'll be back in hometown in like 2 years tops and despite thinking I look good it's not drastic enough

Start lifting for 2 weeks... Hope I'll have a milf mirin one day

Attached: 1503865254869.gif (480x263, 1.24M)

Based. Very bigly so!

It’s worth it man, honestly replaces all the bad memories from the past.

>t. delusional fatty

I think this is a mirin story.
>come home from gym
>police at my house
>domestic violence occurrence
>inside house officer is startled by me in the doorway
>ask where my dad is
>user hes in the police vehicle outside
>take off my jacket before walking out there
>[fast forward]
>cops are gone
>mom gives me rundown of what happen
>the cop asked if you wrestle

I'm positive the officer was merely assessing me physically, but wouldn't he ask that only if I was a potential threat?
Did LAPD just mire me?

it's not gay because you can't tell when it's cropped that much

I'll bite

GET THE FUCK OUT CUNT

That is obviously a male's ass

user your dad is in jail. You have bigger issues

>work at pool store

>big bearish guy instantly notices me

>fast forward to me in the back of his ford superduty with blacked out windows, after loading his truck bed with bags of sand for his filter

>eating his ass, he jerks a load out in under a minute

so glad i lift

Happened some time ago
>be me, taking shower after relaxing workout
>shower booths are open, there is nothing blocking view from the opposite booth
>washing my body, thinking about nothing
>some older guys who is really into crossfit or some other shit went to the booth in front of mine
>I turn around so I can water my back like God intended
>realise that I'm staring in the general direction of older guy's cock (n-no homo, I was looking kinda down to scrub my neck, it's just that he was a manlet)
>biggerthanexpected.jpg
>think to myself "I am not even mad, he is probably bigger than me when I'm erect, it's like his has throbing erection in the making"
>brush it off, I have bodyparts to wash
>namely, my ass
>I feel like retarded titty streamer when I bend forward to wash my ass so I turn to one of the side walls and let water flood my crack, while tring clean shampoo out of my ears
>I turn around to my senile Goliath and realise that he is staring at my ass
>he is literally charmed, bet I could make him dance with cheek-clapping
>nigga is not that big, he was getting hard
>for me
>evacuate on the double to protect my boipussi from being defiled

Tbh I like staring at my ass from time to time and I'm proud of it but that was to much recognition for one shower

seriously what the hell. And he just casually glosses over that like it's normal.

Is it a mire if a chick finds you on social media and adds you first?

>Be fatty in highschool
>Have girl I always talked to and got along with but never had the guts to ask her out.
>She sees me, a few years later, fit
>She literally runs up hugs my arm, says I look so different, barley recognized me.
> I comment "In a good way I hope"
> She says, "Yeah a really good way"

Would have been a sweet moment but she actually looked way worse and I was no longer attracted to her lmao. Still felt OG though

Attached: 1498564882917.png (1001x823, 806K)

No you autist

Attached: 1513474405486.gif (200x147, 1.14M)

Funny, all the girls I would have given my left testicle to fuck back in highschool now look like moonfaced goblins.
I don't know how to feel about it

bags of sand

he's probably black, it is normal

Ok I've never posted one of these because I never browse so here goes. Been lifting 5 years.

>Last summer on holidays in Hungary with GF
>visiting her family
>we're walking down the boardwalk
>her adorable aryan niece has taken a liking to me
>"user looks like a greek god!"
>the sisters all giggle
>I'm wearing a sleeveless walking ahead of the group
>one of the nieces is sitting on my shoulder
>the 2 sisters and cousin are gushing about how my muscles look
>"he is a beautiful man"
>gf is proud

The little girl would always touch my abs too and try to pull my shirt up in public so she could show everyone the sick pack.

Fuck it here's another:

>years ago
>recruit some tinder girl to do ayahuasca with me in an expensive roman themed hotel room
>we get naked in bed
>"omg you are literally perfect"
>proceeds to run her fingers around my entire body in appreciation

Basically any time I've had sex with a girl it's met with shock and delight. Most guys have shitty bodies. you don't need to be elite level to blow away 90% of the competition.

I've been getting mired for so many years I don't even notice anymore.

>hes black
Take that back

Also I didnt gloss over anything. I spoke with both of my parents and the officers.
I know what's happening and i know they're separating.
Is it tough? Hell yeah it is, but im a collected ass motherfucker and I'm going to remain calm.
Now tell me, is that considered mirin?

Attached: 1521568466941.gif (627x502, 940K)

could you post a photo of yourself? I'd like to see what normies consider to be god status

Yeah, just how big are you?

>hungarian
>aryan
Stopped believing you right there

female (female) != "female"

>t. assblasted r**stie

this'll be me. dyel as fuck and I'm already mirin' my biceps whenever I ride my bike or pass a reflective surface. it's better than hating myself, I guess

Kek
The officer was probably mirin, yes. If he was determining if you were a threat I assume he would've asked something more general or common like "do you play football", but wrestlers specifically are known for being muscular

>at gym some days ago
>only noob gains so far
>doing upper body
>arm and chest look bigger and veins are popping out because of pump
>go over to do dumbbell press
>two girls come next right to me
>overhear one of them whispering when I'm doing my sets
>says that I got some really good definition
I guess I could have made a move there, but unfortunately one was fat and the other was taller than me. Anyway thanks for the compliment.

This first one is kind of sad but I guess good at the same time.
>Swole as fuck friend that got me into lifting takes me to a bar to help me get some chicks
>Play pool with a couple girls
>They were kind of quiet and hard to hit on
>Eventually my friend tells me to forget about them they are being too difficult
>One of them tracks us down later
>"Hey my friend thinks you're cute, can she have your number?"
>Friend lies and says he is getting married, then says I'm open
>"Oh! Well my friend thinks you're cute too user."
>Didn't go for it because I felt like a silver medal at that point

>That same night
>Hot girl with big boobs keeps looking over but can't tell if it is at me or my friend
>Eventually one of her friends comes up to me and says she likes my arms or something
>Cool
>Go up to her
>All over me the whole night hugging my bicep and whispering shit in my ear
>Smash that night
Ghosted me after but those were some big milkers.

Attached: 1514190176139.png (1080x1543, 602K)

if you can't tell that's a man's ass even from the thumbnail then something's wrong with you

I've made it

Attached: 1521610232007.gif (285x210, 1.84M)

bost body and routine

That's an English surname

>Getting out of the shower this morning
>Stretch
>Notice my delts coming in out of the corner of my eye in the mirror
>Do poses for a solid two minutes
Today was the first time I felt like I could make it.

lol i'm from glasgow

get out
get out my hoose

it's a reference to a proof of the halting problem in the theory of computation

No she was textbook aryan. Blue eyes, fair blonde hair, ivory skin. I think the little one was actually half german, I don't remember.

I'm so bogged down by injuries from various things unrelated to lifting that it's pretty stripped down. I literally do 1 set to failure with 6 exercises once a week. Before that I did 2x week full body which worked great. I was coming off a brutal nerve injury in my neck and a vegan phase and I took myself from a sticklet to ATH in physique and strength in 6 months.

Just stay consistent man. There's a saying time in the market beats timing the market. Well that applies to lifting too. Stick to tried and true routines and when you know what you're doing modify it to your body and preference.

Sorry boys I do not have a picture on me, it's on my old external drive with pictures of my ex and I do NOT want to go through those.

>solid two minutes

I'm fat and pose longer than that every time I shower.

>bogged down by injuries

Attached: 1516313591317.jpg (419x419, 43K)

based

>be me
>30
>nurse at the home says I’m too old to lift
>deathlift 225 my first time
>mires

HAHAHAHAHA

Attached: pepe_laughing++.jpg (179x282, 7K)

based granps

Not him, but

>Mom sees me shirtless for the first time since I started lifting 10 months ago
>Flex for her since I want mom to be proud of her son's work
>"A-user don't do that, you keep that up and I might fall for you" she says with surprise
>Haha, y-you too mom
>She proceeds to go tell everyone how "ripped" I am and how she told me about falling for my muscles

Feels weird man

Attached: 656.png (500x730, 485K)

>1st month of working out
>mom says "Wow user have you been working out"
>N-no
>5th month of working out
>gf talks about her liking my body
>But I am still not getting laid more often
>tfw

Kek, and nice trips.

Sometimes I wonder what happened to all the girls that rejected me in highschool. Like did they all lose their bodies? Curiosity.

How the fuck do I make gains without getting weird sexual looks from my family?

They are definitely geordies, thats the only place where people say like after every sentence

You don't, fuck your mom. You're your own dad now

Found it in the archive

Attached: the_fuck_op.jpg (1133x629, 133K)

Almost all of them have. Most of the football team are fat fucks too.

This generally takes less than 3 years.

Not sure if this technically constitutes as a mire but I took it as one
>moved into new flat 1 month ago
>2 weeks ago get a letter saying i dont have a tv license (britbong)
>bin it, only tv i watch is on my laptop
>today a guy knocks on my door
>he said he is tv license officer to set up my license
>i said i dont want one i dont watch live tv
>he said can I come inside and check that
>i said no cos i do have a tv and i didnt know if he would nick me for it or not
>he said he will have to get a search warrant if i dont let him in
>i open the door more and stand infront of him, he was taller but i am much bigger
>tell him to fuck off
>he goes away but 1 hour later a policewoman knocks
>she tells me a man was physically intimidated by me
>i said all i did was say fuck off
>she says something liek "that can be quite threatening coming from a man with your build"
I took that as a mire, wanted to ask her number but was too scared cos she was a copper

Attached: 1522434695737.jpg (1920x1080, 304K)

'scuse me mate can you show me your swearing loicense?

don't fuck pigs

tv license? search warrant? what the fuck this can't be real

It is, type in tv license inspector om youtube theres tones of videos of people abusing them, i saw one where a dude opened the door and set his dog on them lmao

Attached: our-database-lists-every-home-without-atv-licence-e-just-2003141.png (500x397, 97K)

this post is satire

duplicate post warning?

Attached: 13214_1.jpg (500x219, 24K)