I need help, Jow Forums
It’s probably mental health and fitness related, so pls no delet
I’ve been battling depression and anxiety for over 3 year. Been going to therapy, taking meds, focused on improving my life. I stopped drinking, made good friends, fixed bad habits, got fit from a skelly... Things were looking good.
But depression was here to stay. Over the last half a year or so, I haven’t really been happy. I haven’t had fun. But I was able to function.
But I’m losing it, guys, really bad. I’ve been a mess for a few days. I’ve never been this suicidal before. My mind is just desperately trying to tell me I want to die. I try to take my mind off of it. But when I fall asleep, I only have dreams of killing myself. When I drive to the gym, it’s like I’m not even driving, it’s autopilot, and my mind is just thinking what to crash into to die. I’ve sat crying in the kitchen for 20 minutes yesterday, because I already had my car keys in my hand and my mind was begging me to drive to the nearest highway bridge and end it.
I honestly don’t know what to do. I’m not scared of death, I’m more scared of living this nightmare of constant fear, but I can’t kill myself because of my parents.
I don’t have anyone else to talk to right now, so I figured I’ll post it here, since you guys have been my family for the last few months.
I really, desperately need help, Jow Forums. I’m losing it and I can’t go on like this for much longer. If any of you guys have anything, literally anything to help me, please do. Not for me, but for my parents, who are very good people.
Thanks guys.