How are you doing Jow Forums? Taking any supps for anxiety/depression? I take ashwagandha I typically feel good, but sometimes I feel like I just want to be sad and miserable, and that I'm just not worthy of being happy.
>constantly telling myself that my gf is just using me for sex >play out scenes in my head where she says she's embarrassed of me behind my back to her friends >play out situations where I just disappear and don't even tell her >want to cheat because I feel like that's what a shitty person like myself should do I'm not a shitty person and I'm not unhappy with gf I just don't understand
I know the feel with cycles of feeling good broken up by the occasional bad feels. I'm in the latter right now. Nothing different on the larger scale, but I am practically paralyzed by waves of apathy and anhedonia. I've been dealing with these for a while, so I've learnt to ride the waves until they subside - sometimes, it's as if the brain has a depressive tantrum.
Aiden Moore
Depressed because I can't put on gains due to low T, constantly have suicidal thoughts, too much of a pussy to actually do it though because I'm afraid of God
Dominic Rivera
I am currently working through an annoying problem. I wonder if any other anons can relate. I go to community college and I have developed some sort of problem with panic. It began suddenly and with no apparent cause. Each time I go to class, after a while I begin to panic like a flight or fight reaction. I get restless and I start to sweat (sweat smells different than when I exercise). My heart rate increases and a lump forms in my throat. I can handle all this, but the worst part is I feel queasy in my stomach with a sour taste in my mouth like acid reflux. It becomes increasingly hard to swallow until I have to leave the room else I'll start to gag. I am scared of throwing up or something in the middle of class (even though it has never happened, I always leave if I reach a point where I can't calm down in my chair). I honestly don't know what to do. I am fit and 6'3 230lbs but my internal feelings do not at all reflect how I appear. This only happens during class and I see no apparent solution tot his problem. If any anons have advice I'd appreciate it. I am somewhat desperate but I will never take drugs like SSRIs ever again (took them as a teenager for depression). Outside of class I feel fine and comfortable and perfectly healthy and energized.
Anthony Price
I get a lot of laughs here on Jow Forums but I’m starting to think this place is really bad for my mental health. Maybe I’m just looking for a scapegoat but I’ve had a rough couple of days just beating myself up. Also today was chest day and by the time I got to incline bench press I couldn’t even put up one rep of what I trained at last week. Can your brain fuck with your lifts?
Kayden Gray
Yes, it can. Mentality can put up barriers user.
Jonathan Lee
I take Jarrows b-right. Multivitamin and 10k vitamin d sublingual
Aiden Perez
>every time I get better, I self sabotage and end up in a worse place >currently only have 3 things: my car, my job, my life >tfw I only care about one of those, and it's the car >burn literally every bridge I make >family won't talk to me anymore, don't ever plan on talking to them >the only reason I haven't killed myself over the past 6 years of shit is because I believe I'm in a valley and not an eternal descent, meaning it gets better somewhere after a while >if I seek mental help, I destroy the only path of a career I have left unless I just up and leave my country
John Rogers
depression is fucking me to the point where i'm pretty much struggling to get through my engineering degree, the only good thing i have going for me is losing weight and lifting and even that barely makes me happy anymore. i talk to 1-2 people a week, i'm basically flunking my classes from self sabotaging and being unable to concentrate from severe caloric restriction (literal fasting for weeks on end) that i do even though i'm a normal bodyweight / borderline underweight due to severe bdd. the only reason i haven't an heroed is for my little sister and my family. lol
Leo Wilson
Good feels >just finished a paper >get to see my friends again soon >building bridges with other friends
Bad feels >tfw she'll never ever date me >still /fat/ and there's no immediate fix >still hopeless and have no future
>small team meeting at work today >qt is going over the numbers >have GAD so I start to feel overwhelmed >sweaty hands >feel my face flushing red from the anxiety >sigh and turn my head to pretend to look out the window >girl leading the meeting says “RIGHT user? It looks like you’re not interested in what I’m saying” >”h-haha no it’s just too early in the morning haha” >get even more red and sweaty
FUCK BREHS I just wanted to yell SORRY IM FUCKED UP in the head and I can’t function comfortably like a normal human being.
I just ordered ashwagandha and l-theanine, hoping they will help if I take them together. Is it true that I should only take the theanine in the mornings? Can i do it every day?
I have no idea how to make friends after university, went to uni in another country so haven't kept the friends I made in uni, and the loneliness is rotting my brain
Xavier Ross
I feel like I have no personality. I can’t hold a conversation for shit unless i’m discussing politics, anime, or vidya. How do I get a personality? How the fuck do you talk to women and have them engaged in conversation? Just tease them and be an asshole subtley?
Jonathan Nelson
You can take l-theanine anytime everyday
Ryder Jackson
>Girl I'm taking on a date grinning uncontrollably wide as soon as she sees me
The only way this place can be bad for your mental is >you spend all your free time here >you take everything you read seriously (especially about girls) >you let this site dictate your entire personality instead of a small part of it
John Gutierrez
I've finally had sucess weaning off phenibut. Keeping busy has really helped, and things are looking up. Glad to have almost kicked it completely
Nathan Wright
yep I'm there on that blues train, I was ok-ish and I started spiralling down for no reason, then some friends decided to ditch me and go out partying without even telling me even though we've been doing shit together for years I know it's depression talking but this high school tier drama bullshit got me feeling betrayed, what the fuck
Anyways, fuck all that noise, hang in there bro, it's tiresome but this rough patches always end, you gotta hang in there until it does
Christopher Lewis
Guess I’m gonna use this as a blog for a second but this is mental health related. My and my girlfriend just got back from the hospital. We were delivering our dead unborn son. Around a month ago we found out he had several birth defects that were incompatible with life. We were heartbroken but there was a 0.01% chance of survival and he was still alive inside her and we cherished the time our little family had together. Originally I wanted to abort but after a little bit of processing I decided I would not give up on my son. Last week we found out his heart had stopped. We went to the hospital and she was induced with medicine and after a mercifully quick labor (he was at 20 months and very small) she gave birth to our sons corpse. Let me tell you something Jow Forums, there is nothing like the wail of the woman you love as she holds your dead sons tiny body. For years and years I have been unable to cry even when I knew it was okay to. That moment broke me into a million pieces and I sobbed uncontrollably for almost an hour straight. We were allowed to keep him and spend time with him for a day and a half before he was getting too dried up and we had to let him be taken by the nurse. He had my fucking face guys. He had hers too, I could see it even though he looked more like an alien than a human being. We’re home now and we’re both dead inside. I’m hoping someone can suggest how to keep ourselves from becoming emotionless husks for the rest of our lives
Joseph Barnes
now thats a good feel. maybe i can share in that feel with you someday, user
Jose Turner
I’ve never had a kid or attempted to reproduce but I would imagine trying for another kid would give you something to focus on. Sorry to hear that man, I can’t even imagine how that must be. You did everything you could.
Jordan Perez
Sorry for your loss, bro. Wish I could give you more advice
Levi Parker
Yeah we’re probably gonna try again later but we don’t wanna just replace him with another baby right away because he deserves to be remembered and loved still. But thanks man even a strangers words help a little somehow lol
Cooper Taylor
>Mom died 6 months ago but it's getting more difficult with time >Still live with my dad but I hate his guts. Literally only say hello and goodbye to him. Haven't had an actual conversation with him in years. >Brother doing well and will probably move out soon. >I'm back in school at 28 trying to get my first college degree after a series of failed higher education ventures. >Having a very difficult time connecting with people and making friends. Haven't had an actual friend in about 10 years. >No friends in school but at least I'm talking to people. >About to end my bulk and cut for the summer. >Alternating between very high days and very low days when I want to off myself. >Lifting is still the only thing that gives me true pleasure.
Just keep talking to people bro. Gotta think of social interaction as a muscle that grows the best on a Bulgarian style program where you try to hit a new max every day. Also really sorry for your loss man but you’re mom is still watching over you
Anthony Young
I’m becoming more and more of a hermit whose letting hate control his existence. My interests are dwindling and all I can do is criticize. I’ve never done anything of note and I’ve been a neet for the past few months. I don’t know what to do with myself. The only positives I’ve experienced recently is my weight loss and occasionally talking to some friends via text. I also hang out usually once a week with one of my closest friends and his girlfriend to play D&D but that’s the majority of my face to face contact with people outside my direct family.
This is starting to become hellish and I just want to break free of this rut.
Charles Allen
Make the conversation all about them while making it not about them. Women love having opinions but hate stating them. Will do anything for attention but will always stand just outside the limelight.
Actually being the focus of anything is cardinal sin, but their entire worth is based on their perceived value. It seems paradoxical to the average man, but the 50% white and 50% black actually has a .1% grey in between and that's the area women live on. Men stand on black or white, so when they do both (flirt then ignore), they unintentionally step on that grey.
Joseph Jenkins
>if I seek mental help, I destroy the only path of a career I have left unless I just up and leave my country nah that's only if they find out. Pay with cash instead of with insurance, and make it clear to the doctor/professional that nobody can find out.
Aiden Parker
I was in your position and I let four words forever ruin everything I ever earned and could potentially receive. What could have been? You have to get through it, you'l never get over it. Don't let my mistake be yours. Nothing ever hurt like losing my daughter, but everything I did resulting from that was worse than if I just coped with it correctly.
Please don't get caught up on what could have been.
Jace Clark
I don't know how to apply this in any practical way, whatsoever.
Take it down, think on it. It's like playing pokemon, there's no one best pokemon, you switch out to have the advantage, but how do you know what that is if you never played it before? Work on your social gains, level up, mayne.
Even if my reference is entry level, I can convey my general idea into a topic you have knowledge on, and I've never met you before and know next to nothing. It's easy, but the learning curve is hell.
Brody Roberts
>recently increased my effort to look good even further >shave regularly and properly >shower in the morning >dress nice and mix it up a bit >try to appear more friendly
so far so good, it even seems to work a bit
>effort pays of, i think at least >girl actually asks whether she can sit next to me >thought nothing really of it >asked her what the new course this semester will be about, just to see how she reacts >seems actually very friendly and receptive, kind of hit it off into some sort of conversation >after the lecture i tried to be a chad and asked for her number >gave it willingly
i thought that maybe now i could try to develop something out of this but
>did not sit next to each other since she came late and there was no space >after lecture we went to the bus together >she suggested that we should take the class for the lectures together
Worst is, when I got her number I immediately saw that she had photo with her bf on whatsapp. She seemed so interested though, is she just trying to get my help for lectures? What is the next step.
Grayson Carter
Im not doing great today bros. Ive been hanging out with this girl for a couple months, mostly in groups. We have been trying to have a real date for a while now and finally both had time this weekend. She along with half the fucking uni got food poisoning yesterday. Fuck bros if shes still sick this weekend im fucked. I realy like this girl and i think its mutual but theres only three weeks left in the semester and i want to be close enough to her that we can see each other over the summer. What do bros? How can I organically escalate things fast enough? (Normally i like to take things slower)
take a deep breath, and come to terms with the hard realization that you will not date her. She's taken. Bummer. Wrong time wrong place. Oh well.
Now that you know you're not gonna date her, you've got to find if there is some other reason to hang out with her. Class is a fine reason. Talking and expanding your friend pool are good reasons. Waiting for her to break up with her bf is a bad reason.
Maybe there are no good reasons for you two to hang out, but I'll bet you can find a healthy reason.
Jack Gutierrez
why were you ok with it yesterday? (or last year or last decade or w/e)
Ryan Davis
sometimes all i can do is just pretend that everything is okay
i think this shows im pretty mentally fucked up right
Carson Lewis
wow im sorry i didnt realize how god awful my laptop microphone is
Charles Robinson
CBT (cognitive behavioral therapy) would help you a lot :) look for a CBT therapist. and you dont have to take medication for the rest of your life.. or at all, unless youd like to
Justin Martinez
Life was great till I just got off the phone with my private health insurance and they won't cover my hospital fees. Why me
Liam Morris
I have been lifting for 2 months and I was happy because of it. I was seeing some progress. Problem is now I am looking I the mirror and I see myself as I was 2 months ago and worse. It started this week and it really eats me up. Mostly I feel shit that my body don't look remotely fuckable in my own eyes.
Camden Wright
I'm afraid I'll die of cringe if I listen to it
Blake Thompson
>Have a dream about the girl I had long-term oneitis for a few years ago >We were in a cute couple together >Wake up >Remember that she lost her looks already, even though she's 22 >No longer cute, just tired looking >She led me on anyway
That dream almost made me miss her. If only I was a little alpha back then, it could have worked.
Zachary Jenkins
>Working awful job during the last 3 weeks at one of those phone repair/case booths you see at malls >Could be an enjoyable and easy job, but the higher ups made the job as convoluted and inefficient as possible >Ended up suffering for it because I had to waste time remembering things like EVERY price in the store and various phone models, even though it's unrealistic and a waste of time if you saw the amount we had in store >Also expected me to repair phones too >Was genuinely depressed >Got another job today >Really fucking happy >However, not sure how I'm supposed to quit this old job because I've never done that before
What do, Jow Forums? How do I quit, while mitigating any possible awkward moments? Or should I just say "fuck it" and give back the uniform and keys I was given instead?
Carter Jenkins
what is your notice period? I quit my job recently and just handed them a brief resignation letter stating that this is my formal notice of resignation, my last day as per my notice period and thanking them for the opportunity.
Cooper Taylor
It's meant to be a month, however, I'm still in the trial period and haven't signed anything. Should I even bother be cordial with them? There's no point of using them as a resume, especially because I barely worked there.
Levi Ramirez
This is currently my existence as well. My criticism and judgement has turned to rage that then somehow became directed at myself. I live in a private hell on earth. I am addicted to comfort and escapism. Anxiety I think is in my way. I don't know how to escape this nightmare.
John Long
I love you.
Matthew Reed
I wish I could help you. And although it’s likely not too uncommon I appreciate hearing that someone else is going through something similar. If anyone on here has any advice for people in our position I’m sure that there’s plenty of people who would appreciate hearing it.
Logan Flores
ohhh man lollol, thanks for the laugh, lol
Easton Cox
it's pridy gud
Austin Lopez
>Should I even bother be cordial with them? you don't know who they know/if you'll ever meet those people again in the future, so I think you should try to be (just my opinion).
I guess you could just say the job isn't for you and hand all your stuff back, especially if you haven't signed anything. They'll just have to deal with it. When are you set to start your new job? You could offer to work at this place until then?
John White
Doing better than I was. >Was nervous autist in teen years >Depressed and cringy poser >Also fat and fucking pussy >Joined military at 17 (reserves) >Come back to school from bootcamp >Getting mires and feeling good >Still somewhat sperging >Try LSD and shrooms >military don't test fo dat shit nigga >Shits life changing >Currently micro dosing to overcome sperglike hurdles Feels good brahs. I think I'll be a normal person one day.
Jeremiah Brown
>broke up with ex three years ago >got depressed been doing drugs and alcohol ever since >clean now but depression is still here >still dream of her I want to end it all.
Anthony Cooper
I think I may need drugs to get out of this. I am totally against drugs but if I don't know what else to do. I tried CBT therapy but I thought the guy was a douche and that I was smarter than him. I try to make changes but as soon as it's not perfect I rage quit or sabotage and start over.
Kayden White
Also noticing how other people act and how I act more mature and less sperglike than they do. Feels good man.
Brandon Green
Have you tried anything that we can rule out as not working?
Camden Morgan
Microdose LSD
Xavier Brooks
Can you give more info than that? Did this work for you? Where to fuck to you get LSD?
Wyatt Gomez
Yessir. See If you're stuck in a weird mental rut and are wanting change, it will change how you see everything. Go to a club or rave. You'll find the shit at a rave.
Isaiah Watson
Go on YouTube for lots of info.
Camden Sanchez
The only reason I doubt that is purely because they're Chinese nationals, which i think are moving back after they're done studying in my country. I'm meant to work tomorrow, but I just want to enjoy the nice weather tomorrow before I start my new job.
I was in a real bad place mentally this week.
Evan Perry
No because I’m an asshole. I tend to slip in and out of being in this state a couple of times annually. I think generally just getting out there and being with the public has helped me sometimes but after a little while of isolation I completely slip into this existence. I don’t think I’m half as bad as some people but I’ll be damned if I’m happy living this kind of life. I’m also trying to avoid being prescribed anything. I fear possible addiction, personality changes, and other side effects. I don’t want to be dulled any, I’m dull enough as is. Interesting idea but I’m not sold on it making permanent positive changes.
Chase Foster
>talk to girl for 3 weeks every day >crazy bitch fucking lights a candle in church for me in front of her parents for Easter, or so she says >can't wait to talk to you tomorrow user tee hee hee :3 >last online 4 days ago What happened lads...
>girls very obviously likes me >still too terrified to text her and tell her I miss her
What the fuck is wrong with me
Isaac Ramirez
>had motivation a week ago >bought a gym membership >haven't been all week >eating fast food again >not sleeping
how do I stop being so stupid? I know the correct decisions to make, but I keep impulsively doing whatever would make me happy in the next 10 seconds.
Justin Green
I hate the way dating works these days, it's too confusing Me and this girl who I recently got with (not officially together) talked on the phone for about an hour while she's bored at work today, talk for more throughout the day over text. She's called me beautiful (never been called that by a girl before), told me she likes a certain mannerism of mine last night, etc. So a few hours ago I tell her I like when she plays the piano to me, how her hands move across the keys and her face full of concentration is very attractive. She responds with "...(heart emoji). I then say lets see each other soon and no response for almost 2 hours now.
Why, why why why? Why can't it be simple? Have phones and texting twisted our interactions so much? Yet at the same time it's almost impossible to not utilize it. I try my best to keep texting and what not to a minimum but sometimes it is necessary. I literally spent Saturday and Sunday night at her house with her in bed. I kissed her goodbye, etc WHY CAN'T YOU JUST RESPOND GODDAMNIT NOTHING MAKES SENSE
Definitely piqued my interest. Psychedelics have interested me for a while. It could be something to look more deeply into just as long as I don’t become some kind of annoying hippie or end up burning my brain out.
Carter Harris
fuck em then. just hand your shit back to them, say the job's not for you and chill until you start your next job.
Robert Richardson
I think I have 2 problems:
1) How my internal systems work, ie, emotions, mind, etc. I have anxiety which I think ultimately results in depression. My reward circuits are completely fucked up.
2) How I relate to a world gone mad. I don't want nor am I capable of following religion, a "guru" of any type or the dominate liberal/"Progressive" consumer horror show I find myself wanting to get as far away from as possible and/or destroying with fire. I can't lie to myself to make my existence easier so swallow. I know there is a way to navigate this degeneracy and degradation without give in to it or day dreaming about full fledged nuclear war breaking out
Joseph Morris
That's what I'll do probably. Where I live has beautiful autumn weather right now, so I plan on having a comfy stroll through my city. It looks so nice in autumn.
Zachary Nelson
Yeah I feel you. I’m basically on the same page as you. I feel an absolute sense of societal alienation brought on by myself, my own mind and experiences. If I could just ignore the world or embrace it for what it is I feel that I’d be able to gleefully go back to living but I can’t see myself doing that.
Levi Rogers
Another thought. This is the negative, hateful, destructive thoughts that I feel are eating away at my soul and limiting how well I can live my life. It’s an anger at the modern world and my lack of acceptance for what it is. I never thought of myself as a hateful person and I doubt many believe me to be such, but I feel like I’ve had too much to think. Dark revelations about the world have dragged me into a downward spiral. I’m aware of what’s going on in the world, maybe partially inaccurately, but I completely cut myself off from life and anything that would personally affect me.
Hudson Taylor
Furthermore I have to wonder if I really DO know what’s going on if I’m ignoring life. I can’t possibly know if I’m not even participating in the world.
Samuel Watson
>went ham drywalling this job to impress my boss >got tendinitis >start back on opiates >quit lifting for 5 weeks >lifting once a week now >depression creeps back in hard >ex accidentally charges something on my amazon account >try to contact her >she's blocked my number >have to find her on facebook and message her that way >break down to her about now being able to talk to her >she wants to meet face to face >I dont want to get back with her >tfw your only mental support system is now the cause of your current existential crisis >work seems pointless >living with mom and dad >poured all my savings into my motorcycle >stuck here for a while >feels like failing
I don't think im gonna make it this time bros.
Nathaniel Fisher
I only come for the memes too. If you can discern the good lifting advice from the bad one you dont need advice at all. But aparently people actually take memes seriously and feel short at 6 foot something
Alexander Collins
In all my worst times I've made it a mission to not get medication and just find the fix myself.
Not saying it's the best idea but it's my preferred solution. I think the way the brain works is far too complicated to be fixed by a pill. I Know your body works off chemical balances etc etc and there's merit to drugs, but you never needed a starter pack of pills to get your body going, it produces it in its own way. So I don't see medical assistance as a great solution for mental health. I see grabbing life by the balls and fixing it yourself as the solution. As hard as it may be sometimes.
>I'mm 25 now and I've been single for years. >I get lonely sometimes, but I have great friends. >My family is wrecked health wise but I have a wonderful father. >My job wasn't the greatest but I have financial freedom to the point of being able to quit it when I had enough. >I was dating a girl recently who I really liked and it was close to my first relationship in 5 years. But she had enough and it ended. >I'm not as strong as I used to be because of injury, but I'm close and my form is impeccable. >I get really hungry at night sometimes, but I look lean, feel good, and the girl who I was seeing really liked it too.
Overall I'm happy, without a doubt.
You can't have the good without the bad user. It's impossible. People who are 100% positive are strange because it's usually false. You need to be hurt sometimes. To be sad. To be angry. To be upset. To cry. It's important. It's contrast for positive emotions and you need it to feel the good sides, and to understand what they're about.
Recently I had a dream where a massive tsunami hit our town and fucked us up and we all died. I remember falling from a building, and thinking to myself >"ahh well fuck we didn't reach the top but atleast we were on the way" and I woke up from the impact. I'll never forget that dream. It was the most reassuring moment of my life so far.
Adrian Walker
Hahaha I just realised in the last part about the dream it sounds like I meant reach the top of the building. I meant my goals, like reaching all the goals I had in life. I'm not done yet, but I'm closer than I ever have been. I may die before I reach them, but atleast I know it's because my time was too soon, not because I never gave a damn and never tried.
Hunter Cox
lifting for depression and shit, trying to get my life on track too.
Any general advice for me or others? I still get very very depressed at times even when lifting.
(kinda drunk rn too lol)
We're gonna make it broz
Nolan Russell
No matter what is going on in your life as long as you are going to the gym and improving not just going but actively trying to improve you will never be a loser
Chase Nelson
>anxiety due to bad dental situation >weak social skills >get office job at my college >first job ever so my anxiety is also higher than ever >mostly just smile and talk with very few words, people must think I'm retarded
>a cute girl gets hired and we have to work alone in the same room on some shifts >i try to talk to her but i can only come up with a few sentences every half hour >for the next few months she acts friendly / touchy towards me to help me >gives me her number on her last day of work
It was an unfamiliar situation and I was very confused at the time but it actually helped us talk more and reduced my fear of women. She we can keep talking when college starts again in September. Which also means she doesn't want to see me during summer.
To me it's a win because I met someone who would help me in my quest to improve my social skills. But I also feel like I'm a waste of her time.
Carter Hernandez
>got a shit haircut, too short >tinnitus is getting worse >can't seem to go to bed at 23 as planned since like 27 years
Leo Cox
>compulsively refreshing my bank account for student loan that gets posted either this morning or next thursday
I have an exam soon and I'm not even sure if I know all of the material. I hope I'll be fine, fuck me if this isn't stressful. I was taking fish oil for depression (I've had two psychiatrists tell me I have it) but I'm not noticing any large difference even though my dosage is two capsules a day. I'll check out ashwagandha since I have anxiety issues as well, OP.
join military maybe? reserves might even be good enough. got me out of bad times
Camden Hill
All the best bro. Obviously idk about the specifics of your exam, but you know some things, right? Thing is you may get lucky in the sense that the questions asked are related to your strengths.
Adam Martin
>19 > Balding > HKVirgin > High Sex Drive > Only virgin beta In the group and get treated like one >Lifting weights for boosting test and confidence
bruh its 2 hours. She might be busy. Shit happens, ykno?
Jayden Flores
>getting weird, but i figure she's just drunk and upset about how roomie was treating her >every now and then she looks at me and moves her head towards mine >i don't want no sloppy seconds, so i break eye contact and keep watching >at one point she flat out says "you're really attractive, you know that?" >laugh it off >she tries to kiss me a few more times >reject every advance, eventually say i'm not keen on it cause it'd be awkward when roomie comes back. Plus i don't want to fuck her, way too many redflags >end up back on the couch watching shit on tv until roomie comes home >she slept on the couch instead of with him >went home the next day now, i'm not into this chick. But the closeness and feeling like someone cared about/was into me, even if it was only for a few hours was top stuff. And i feel like i'm dying inside now it's gone. Only gf i've ever had dumped me, every single attempt i've made with women has been a failure. Fuck me, i just feel empty rn. Having someone lie next to you and enjoy your company is all i want brah. Even if it was just to get back at my roomie, and she wasn't actually into me, i don't really care. It felt good, and now that it's gone it feels so much worse. Should i have cucked him? Did i do the right thing? I legit just keep repeating a line in my head from a bible story i've always liked, the one about people praying in the streets vs people praying at home, and how the one that prays openly in the street for all to see has had his reward already, whereas the man who prays quietly at home will get his later. Not religious fag, but this is all that's keeping me hanging on. Genuinely considering reading the bible to see if there is anything to help with this loneliness. I don't know what to do.
1/2
Jonathan Brown
fucked up the order
I need help >Roomie met this chick at uni that lives an hour away. >They bang a few times, it's all g, i don't really care >she's a little annoying as freshly 18 and gets drunk really quickly >mires me whenever she's drunk, saying im way more muscular than my roommate >says she's worried i'll become "a little man in a giants body" lmao >but again, i don't really care, not my bitch so it's fine. Just take the compliment >I finish work late at night, usually midnight or 1am >She's up sometimes when i come home, will have a chat >complains roomie wouldn't make her any food, i say she can make a sandwhich if she wants >end up chatting for a while before she goes back to sleep with him >don't really mind since i'm up late anyway >this happens a few times >tells me the roomie keeps calling her fat, and it's really getting to her (she's skinnyfat at most) >be a few days ago, roomies invited her over again >she's here, they do the do while im at gym >get home, say g'day >She has a chat with me for a bit, seems angry about something >apparently roomie told her after they fucked that he was thinking about getting together with his ex girl >Had plans to go out with ex for dinner that night >new girl can't get home cause of train running times and shit, idk >end up going grocery shopping with her, show her how to cook pasta (bitch didn't even know how to do that) >hang out, she starts drinking a little bit as she's mad at my roomie >end up watching some shitty meme compilation on her laptop together on the couch >keeps moving closer to me >her laptop runs out of battery, end up going into my room to get mine to keep watching shit >she jumps on my bed, so lie down. She moves right next to me again, head on my arm now >says how uncomfortable it is, and i lift my arm instinctively. She moves her head onto my chest
this should have been first XD
Dylan Cooper
didnt come through and they told me i wont be getting it until august, time to wageslave then fucking END ME
I don't take it for depression, just to keep the schizophrenia and psychotic episodes at bay.
Ryder Phillips
I don't really know. I have a problem with a girl and don't know what to do. We both attend the same classes at uni >we always sit near one another and always talk to each other, we're great friends basically >We always tease and poke fun at each other >She is VERY touchy with me(and no other guy or girl in my class) : massaging my forearm, feeling my upper back muscles, resting her arm on my thigh, resting her head on my shoulder and so on) The kicker is >she has a boyfriend(that's studying in a different city than her) I don't know what she wants, she's giving me some mixed signals. Is she flirting?Is she just comfortable around me? I don't want to pursue this any further and have her reject me because of her boyfriend, because that would be awkward from then on
