HQ! MAYDAY! MAYDAY! WE'RE TAKING ENEMY FIRE FROM CHADS, REQUESTING BETA TEAM, OVER.
HQ! MAYDAY! MAYDAY! WE'RE TAKING ENEMY FIRE FROM CHADS, REQUESTING BETA TEAM, OVER
Anthony Robinson
Levi Lee
Foxtrot this is HQ. Beta team is currently in pinned down by with fem-HAHAHAHAAHAH bot HAHAHAHAHAAHA and a normie horde three clicks east from your position. We are sending special ops unit to provide assistance.
Benjamin Thompson
Specify the direction of incoming fire over.
Christopher Bailey
>This is HQ. Hold your position. We cannot afford to lose this foothold. We're mobilizing the omega team and sending them to your coordinates, ETA 35 minutes. over
Xavier Bell
HQ, HQ, this is air unit Bravo, can assist with gun run on normie horde, how copy?
Nathaniel Ward
P - 321 F - 2070
got that HQ
Brody Thompson
HQ THIS IS BETA TEAM! WE'RE SURROUNDED BY STACIES! WE'VE SENT CYBORG TEAM 6 BUT EVEN THEY'RE TOO AWKWARD TO TALK TO THEM! REQUESTING PISS BOTTLE RUN ON OUR POSITION! I REPEAT REQUESTING PISS BOTTLE RUN ON OUR POSITION!
John Hill
You are free to assist Beta team, unit Bravo.
Nicholas Phillips
Roger on the location. Heatscans of fast moving artillery approaching your direction from South South West over.
Oliver Anderson
HQ, we're sending airstrikes to stacy school, codename F.E.M, we require anti-anti-aircraft aircrafts, over.
Logan Lopez
This is HQ over. Ordering all personnel in the vicinity of Beta Team to provide covering fire over.
Beta team you are free to use your own piss bottles over. ETA on rocket piss bottles is 7 minutes over.
Luis Nelson
chadian troops have surrounded our position, we're trying to break out but it seems that they have encircled us completely. we're running out of supplies and ammo. we need relievement now!
Jack Lewis
Negative on the aircrafts over. You are to carpet bomb the F.E.M. over.
Hudson Lopez
We have multiple birds in the sky with eyes on chad team. We can provide an evac in 3 minutes. You have to hold on boys. over
Dominic Evans
Parachute Team Mike redirected to your position along with ammo and supply drop. Hang in there, out.
Alexander Cook
Roger that HQ
Air unit Charlie, I advise the zone Sand Dunes 12-f to be evacuated immediately, airstrikes are coming in exactly 1 minute.
Liam Collins
Foxtrot this is S.P.E.C.I.A.L. Ops, we have flanked the Chads and eliminated most of their team. The team dispersed once we arrived and there are several stragglers. Take caution, returning to HQ.
Dominic Brooks
HQ the situation does not look good, we've lost Echo and Bravo team! requesting nuke or predator, over.
Christopher Hughes
I have been practicing in il-2 for years for this moment.
Joseph Garcia
We have an A-10 in the sky Foxtrot. Provide Grid Co-ordinates for Chad positions over.
Alexander Price
All units, This is Tendie Team Two, weve encountered something big here... were seeing a high school football game in progress, place is packed with chads and Stacies. Request backup, how copy?
Carter James
Negative on that foxtrot Over. We cannot I repeat we CANNOT provide a nuke in the area over but we have 64th Agressor Squadron awaiting Grid co-ordinates over. ETA 2 minutes
Ethan Flores
Smoke em Tendie team two. Mission is a go. Go in hard and Go in fast
Julian Edwards
HQ to Tendie Team-2, copied that, sending air unit Delta Z-5 aswell as SEAL unit Zulu f-52, over.
Luis Edwards
HQ, this is Big Boy 25, requesting immediate barrage on the mountainous region three clicks north-east, grid 734536, direction 4800, over.
Jaxon Ross
We copy your grid co-ordinates Big Boy 25 over. We have Tomahawks on Standby over. Advice you vacate the area. ETA 5 minutes
Elijah Adams
Understood. Send the reinforcements to grid 212 E-5
Jordan Long
All units advised to converge on grid 212 E-5 over. Foxtrot Evac has been initiated Do you Copy Over.
Bombs away on grid 734536. Let's win this one now boys.
Cameron Wilson
HQ, this is Big Boy 25. End of mission, estimate 20 casualties, over.
Isaiah Thompson
14th Katana Guard Platoon: deploying in progress
Chase Rodriguez
>"s-sir, unidentified ground units detected in grid square Whiskey-Sierra, please advice"
>"let me see, lieutenant... those are MSC boys- clandestine mercenary units. Wouldn't see them in the OOB- they only work for tendies..."
Chase Jones
All units, be advised
Roasties launching Disappointment attacks on basement NEET facilities in the north quadrant
Look alive, boys - we had two senior ops NEETS tricked into getting jobs for pussy just last week
Landon Sanchez
Strike Team Bravo here, we're about to strike the enemy southwest of your position 20 minutes from now. You'll only have a 15 minute window so get ready to run when their lines are penetrated. Prepare vehicle transport for fatbots if possible.
Jonathan Barnes
WE PISSBOTTLED OUR OWN MEN
FRIENDLY PISSBOTTLING CONFIRMED
MOTHER OF GOD WHYYYYYYY
John Cox
HQ, this is Gamma team, we've sustained heavy feels and cannot press on...please send an evac, Over. *krrzzt*
Isaiah Sullivan
Copy that, specify your location Gamma team.
Nathan Sanders
Codename Mentally Ill reporting... you cant trust the incels... the incels are working with the Redditors... this is my final transmission... godspe-
Christian Diaz
Not A Redittor XD here over, disregard previous message of mentally ill.
Ryder Anderson
MAYDAY MAYDAY! CHAD HAS INFILTRATED OUR TENDIE RESERVES! MAYDAY MAYDAY! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!
Nathan Cox
This is looking bad boys, we're getting surrounded by the enemy, things are going very south.
Put a golden shot in your pockets men...
Death is better than dealing with Chada and Stacies...
Jason Lee
HQ come in, this is FrogTeam4 aka storm comin for the Norman over. We have the hipster square clear, requesting next orders copy.
Mason Edwards
*Krsh* HQ, This is Python 2-4, engaging battlefield, over *Krsh*
John Rivera
YOU FOOL, THE KATANA GUARD IS TOO POWERFUL TO BE DEPLOYED IN THIS AREA, DEPLOY AT THE HIGH SCHOOL FOOTBALL GAME, THAT IS AN ORDER
Kayden Morris
*Krzzt* All units this is Python 2-4, i see a uhhhhh....IT'S COMING DOWN, NOOOOOO, NOOOOO *Sobs can be herd over the radio*
Anthony Allen
Roger that, piss bottle aistrike incoming. Get your people out, don't want them in the cross fire over,
Landon Gomez
"Comin' over to your position Beta Squad, expect me in 8 minutes"
Jordan Morales
>this fucking thread
id forgotten this feeling of laughter and happiness
Michael Taylor
*suicided retard noises*
Robert Bailey
All units be advised, you have a platoon sized element of normies coming up on your rear. Danger close, i repeat, danger close.
Michael Garcia
deploying low-orbit REEE cannon strike at Lat: 36.9461641173823 Lon: -2.4090152978897095. evacuate within 10 km of the area within 2 hours before the strike over.
Evan Lee
All units, this i-is P-Py-Pyth-PYTHON 2-4! I SLAUGHTED A NORMIE HQ, GASOLINE IS LEAKING OUT, REQUESTING DRONE STRIKE AT MY AREA SO THE SURRONDING CHADS PARISH WITH ME! FUCKING DO IT!
Connor Stewart
PYTHON THIS IS BETA COMMAND ARE YOU SURE YOU WANT TO CONFIRM THE STRIKE? WE THINK THERE'S A CHANCE TO GET YOU OUT BUT IF YOU REALLY WANT TO GO DOWN LIKE THIS WE WON'T DENY YOU
Julian Powell
"DO IT!" *Deep breath* "JUST DO IT, I DON'T CARE IF IT'S 50/50"
Juan Scott
Bigbaddiedaddy this is G.E.A.G. (Genetically Engineered Anime Girl) unit 003. Thanks for the tip we'll be rerouting away from the normie horde and meet up with P.O.T.A.T.O. for a counter attack.
Easton Martinez
Godspeed Python. ETA 35 seconds. Take as many of the bastards with you as you can
James Perry
"Thank you..." *Gunshots are herd then a loud explosion then static*
Jackson Ward
BETAS AND FROGS, WE HAVE YOU SOUNDED. GIVE UP YOUR ARMS AND SURRENDER AND WE WILL LET YOU LIVE.
- CHAD, STACEY AND BEC, COMMANDERS OF THE ALPHA ALLIANCE
Elijah Price
All units be advised we are deploying resurrected Shuaiby on the battlefield. I repeat we are deploy-*gunshot*. Aw shit he killed himself again.
Cameron James
12th Katana Platoon sent instead to reinforce the 27th Incel "Handholdless" Brigade at Chadman High School. C-130 transport ETA: 3 minutes. The Virginite president ordered the whole Guard Katana Regiment to the frontlines to cover the embarrassing retreat of the 54th Non-Virgin Penal Division.
Isaiah Gomez
*Python would emerge from the rubble, his uniform burnt, legs and left hand missing, he would crawl to the leaflet* "No....Must...Not...Ughhhhhhhhh" *He would draw his from the leaflet, making lines of blood before dying*
Jonathan Sanders
"I'm not going out like this" I
*Fires up tendie turret*
Kayden Gray
>"Sir, the new uniforms have arrived. We'll be equipping 14th through 52nd NEET Brigades in the following 2 weeks"
Kevin Ward
Firing * the sounds of whistling missles is heard followed by many large explosions near the enemy position *
Nicholas Jackson
HQ! We need some assistance. A regiment of roasties has been assaulting our position all morning. We've tried to inform our CO of the situation but he won't let us until he's finished his coffee! I have good men dying out here! Give us some orders ASAP.
Isaiah Ross
"ALL UNITS BE ADVISED. AIR RECON REPORTS MULTIPLE TYRONE III-CLASS DESTROYERS OFF THE COAST OF NEET BAY. TAKE PRECAUTIONARY MEASURES."
Camden Jackson
"Acknowledged, we're calling in an artillery barrage on near coordinates. Tell your boys to keep their heads down and brace for impact."
Brody Russell
DANCING FROGS HAS BEEN OVERRUN AT THE STADIUM BY AN LGBT HORDE; THERE ARE THOUSANDS OF THEM. THEY'RE SODOMIZING EVERYONE IS THE UNIT UPON CAPTURE. I'M IN THE VIP BOOTH BUT THEY'RE ALREADY ATTEMPTING TO GET PAST THE BARRICADE. REQUESTING TACTICAL ARTILLERY NUKE ON MY POSITION.
Grayson Russell
(Heavy Static)
Chin-chong, chin-chong! Asian user reporting from Guanzhou, a city in China!
(Heavy Static)
I have killed both my grandparents and infiltrated a secret Chinese Chad site! Awaiting -
(Crackling Static)
...OVER!
Chase Hill
>"ALL UNITS BE ADVISED. AIR RECON REPORTS MULTIPLE TYRONE III-CLASS DESTROYERS OFF THE COAST OF NEET BAY. TAKE PRECAUTIONARY MEASURES."
BELAY THAT ORDER - FALSE REPORT, FALSE REPORT
EVERYONE KNOWS TYRONE CAN'T SWIM
William Walker
OUR ADVANCE ON THE CALIFORNIA FRONT HAS BEEN STOPPED IN ITS TRACKS
THE STACYS HAVE DEPLOYED A WOODEN DOOR
OUR WEAPONS WON'T PENETRATE IT, WE NEED SOME HEAVY ORDNANCE DOWN HERE
Brandon Hill
Roger, sending artillery nukes to your position, Godspeed
Austin Wood
"Roger that, calling off our Cuck-Class Subs.
Awaiting further orders."
Bentley Thomas
HQ, come in HQ. We've been hearing some rumours of a possible power struggle in the Normie High Command. There have been some reports of Brads turning on their Chad allies in the midst of battle. Can anyone verify these rumours? Over.
Lincoln Adams
"I'm flying over Stacey Francisco and the Chad Bridge is collapsing, i see Brads hitting Chads with bats, get a scout recon out there!"
Joseph Flores
Is their AA systems up still
Jackson Davis
"HQ, this is battletoad, found a Chad-Held city, permission to use nukes?"
Oliver Brooks
"Nope, it's fucked up, see destoryed ones on the bridge"
Hunter Brooks
* squadron of b-47 bombers appear followed by a large cloud of toxic gas flowing down from the planes *
Landon Cruz
"This is Battletoad, too risky to drop nukes, heading back to Air Base Tendie, godspeed"
Jordan Cox
Requesting all Depression and Anxiety units to pull back to the start line in Sectors Tinder and Bumble. Repeat, get back to the start line in Sectors Tinder and Bumble.
The enemy is strongly repeat STRONGLY reinforcing their trench line there with 10/10 Stacy units and we have reports of Alt-Chad mechanized divisions arriving with fresh supplies of solo cups, beer coolers, and chiseled jaws. Retreating Beta units are also claiming to have seen flawless hairlines deployed.
Eli Jones
roger that, our resupply units are tied down now doing some mopping up of a few patchwork Brad regiments. will advise shortly.
keep firing, keep firing.
Gavin Hill
what's your ammo situation? try to hold on, we're coming to get you out of there
Daniel Smith
bigbaddiedaddy is running low on fuel here. requesting an aerial refueling unit, over.