All the jokes aside, how do people get laid, exactly? I still don't get it

>have friends
>some friends are female
>connect with one
>starts spending more time with her
>you two become affectionate
>start grabby and kissy with each other
>one day you're alone
>???
>Profit!

>be European
>go to legal brothel
>sex

Done.

This unironically is what happens to me.

It's how it works for everyone but Jow Forums is so retarded, they still haven't figured out what "be yourself" even means.

>I don't know what a condom is

So it will never happen then

I'm myself all the time. It just doesn't happen to subpar valueless males

How do you get female friends

Ask women to date you and they'll want to be just friends

You could choose to not be a subpar valueless male

I dunno. Coworkers, classmates, friends of female siblings. They're everywhere. Not sure how you can avoid it.

It's not a choice, how do people not realize that?
Easy to avoid when no women want to ever speak to you

>when you meme and bait your best because you try to cope with reality

aouch!

You chose to be a basement-dweller who doesn't take of himself.

A lot of you guys really sell yourselves short, then you come to this cesspit and feed each others delusions which only makes things worse.

Go outside and see what women are really like, it's depressing.

I'm not a basement dweller, i can make male friends no problem. I moved out a while ago, have a steady job, even do charity work. I did not choose to be valueless to women, they don't even want to be my friend.
This place is just the only place to find others to commiserate. We only share the stark reality of dating and sex as a subpar valueless male, we share our real life experiences of being rejected and ignored

Is that Charlie Sheen and Lil Pump? Why? I know they're both drug aficionados, but whats the connection here?

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How do you get female friends if you are not a social butterfly

yep This is how normans do it. almost always through friends. yet their "advice" somehow always has nothing to do with friends, they spew PUA shit in alpha delusion.

op its like employment. (((network))) or ur fucked

why would anyone choose that?
it just happens, there isn't any choice involved

Pump posted something on IG saying he wanted Sheen for a new music video. 10 lean-infused days later, voila

I sure as shit wasn't a social butterfly and I always had a few female friends. People talk to you or are interested in something you are doing you and you talk back. Next time you see them, say hi because you had spoken to them before and things just continue on that way. There's not much to it.

He's a fucking faggot take that can of Monster off that pic. Fucking heresy.

music video originally

>Charlie Sheen in Lil Pump's music video
Ebin

Clearly you are not telling us something. If your life is together then you should have no trouble attracting girls. Most likely you have never asked a girl out.

Certainly sounds like you were a social butterfly

Because you can choose to get a haircut and a job.

Every single step of this is like a 1 in a million chance. I don't understand.

It's because the first step involves leaving your house and it's not mentioned here.

That doesn't answer my question. Why would someone choose to not do those things?

>This place is just the only place to find others to commiserate.
This is why I always come here but it's literally only for that commiseration. Never through all this dysfunction would I listen to anything a bitter, pissed-off virgin says about the "reality" of women and their ignorant opinions on why they can't get laid. Most anyone can get laid unless they're operating under the kinds mental blockages that get traded back and forth here as """truths""".

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>People talk to you
I can have a good laugh with my male workmates and talk to them like friends, but I have never worked with a girl who was not really standoffish and only wanted to get away. Not everyone can just get along with women like it is nothing to think about.

Don't ask me, ask the smelly neckbeard NEETs why they live that lifestyle.

So you don't know? I don't know either. I don't think it's a choice, then. There is no reason to choose to be that way, yet people still are.

Girls have always wanted absolutely nothing to do with me. I mean yes I'm shy, quiet and can be awkward. The look of disgust or disinterest on their faces when I try to talk to them is very noticeable. I won't ask out random women on the street so no, I haven't asked anyone out, this getting a gf through friends thing is rubbish though as no woman has ever tolerated being around me enough to be my friend.

I honestly don't know. Physical gestures like the way you look and hold yourself wind up escalating into touching, and from there it's just natural and your body sorta knows what to do. Getting there is another story.

>from there it's just natural and your body sorta knows what to do
What if it doesn't?

Is that pic suppose to prove something? He's a lot more attractive than I am

I lost my virginity the day after my 25th birthday. Matched with a 21 year old on Tinder, took her to a hotel and it sort of just came naturally, honestly she was more nervous than I was. Having now done it, I think it'd be easy enough to make it happen again with someone else. I just need to actually try. I didn't try ONCE from birth until I was 25 because my self-esteem was dogshit. One day I said fuck this I want pussy, and I got it. I have no other advice to give, lol. The chads are right, you just make it happen.

Sounds like mental issues. Considered therapy?

Practice, practice, practice. In real life, preferably.

The way curves work and the human body is laid out kinda make it natural. It's like petting a dog. Your hands know where to go. And we're sorta designed so that penetration kinda just happens if you lie facing each other. Or spoon her. Or have her sitting in your lap. Or have her head in your lap. Or face her sitting on a table or countertop or chair. Or have her straddling you. Really, like 90% of the ways you can kiss lead pretty much naturally to the genitals meeting.
And humping really is pre-programmed. I know it's a hentai meme, but your hips do shit when you're fucking that you wouldn't think yourself capable of.

What about all the people with haircuts and jobs that can't get a gf?

>can't get
>can't
Show me just one such guy who can't get a gf.

I had that mentality then I downloaded tinder and got no matches

I bet you're beating yourself up. Like this is the 'leader' of incel. The pic is edited he's an above average looking dude who considers himself genetic waste.

His virginity has nothing to do with a lack of physical attraction. He's just stuck in this really bizarre way of seeing women and the world in general.

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one goes to the bar, drinks, and talks to girls. i got laid twice by having a slutty co-worker, and the other one we just liked each other. i should of asked for her number.

In my conclusion it's only luck in the end
shit like dating tipps and good looking, and what I don't know, can only change the odds in your favour, but in the end, it's only luck

What would therapy do? I don't think I have any cognitive distortions or any mental illnesses I'm just a subpar person.

Non trolling image of him

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And again I am actually ugly. Girls in highschool used to just call me it unprovoked, or even worse act like I was some really handsome guy jokingly cause the thought of me being with any women is just such a joke to everyone.

I am no longer in highschool. This means nothing to me.

Honestly yeah, I agree with some people on here.

Its really just luck, improving your self esteem, being more confident in yourself, actually trying without being too much of a sperg, mimicking what other guys do in a good way, learning to be yourself and not fake yourself to make it worse, have connections and meet girls that way, go out more hang out more so you can find more girls, get involved with activities and groups so you can meet more people

But the main point in that is luck. Who knows when or how youll ever find that girl who will like you. But you have to try to find her

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middle/high school and a handful of years following it are the only time in life worth giving a damn. There's no more magic at 27+ and that goes at least quintuple for women.

Holy shit you are retarded. You must not have left the basement after high school right? Instead of living like an adult you have a high school mentality.

What a blatant idiotic lie.

Most guys who claim tinder success here talk about how they form their profiles in a way that is nothing like them, but instead what they know women want.

You're telling me hooking up at 30 is every bit as magical and adventurous for you as it was when you were 16?

How did you get any of that from him plainly stating he has no classmates? so mad

There's literally a hormonal mating period from puberty to adulthood. It doesn't last forever.

Primarily Tinder, Skout, /soc/ and other modern low effort social hookup media. You're really scraping the bottle of the barre in terms of character generally, but women are almost always of low character anyways. I don't have terrible issues matching with moderately attractive girls even on Tinder, but I've only actually fucked fatties due to my merves and lack of effort.
Fatties should be a good start.

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Hooking up at 30 is way easier and better in every way than at 16. What are you, a teenager virgin?

I have no female siblings.
A total of three of my classmates are women.
Few of my coworkers are women and the way shifts are distributed means I am hardly ever in contact with anyone for long enough to get to know them.
The idea that no matter where you got there will be women is something that doesn't exist outside of highschool. Your advice is useless.

That doesn't end at 27 but more like 57.

It is. I am +30 and can confirm.

Ok so you never got laid in your youth. Just say that instead of making an ass of yourself.

Oh well i wasnt talking about trying to fuck a girl, I just mean to find a relationship

People on tinder flash all of the materialistic things women to want to get an easy fuck

Internet dating is still for social failures.

There is this thing called internet, which you may have heard of. It's got things like dating sites and tinder, that make meeting girls extremely easy.

Ok so you never got laid. Just say that instead of making an ass of yourself.

99% of the population is social failures?

You carry yourself like a female. Go work on that prontissimo.

It's good to see that you've disavowed the bullshit that you were sprouting before. You've made a small step towards becoming a better and more sincere person.

Honestly guys

Just dont be ugly

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Land of the free everyboy

Not for actually no-value failure men like me. Going online is just another place to fail and be ignored and rejected. For men like me meeting and having a woman want to talk to us is the equivalent of climbing Mount Everest in terms of ease and possibly. I don't get how you normies here can't realize that. We try, we try a lot, we aren't some basement dwelling caricature that you'll paint us as to disregard our existance. We were cursed with poor genetics and women are very harsh when you don't meet their standards of what they consider to be a human.

Just lol if you think that 99% of population is interested in internet dating.

Jesus fucking christ... What if I told you that genetics has nothing to do with it unless you are a complete fucking freak of nature.

In my country in 2017 3.1 million people used tindr. That's 15% of the population. Even accounting for other dating services with older customers it's still not a majority by any means. It's higher than I expected though. As an ordinary 1st world country I expect that the rate will be similar in countries like America.

Then explain why exactly whenever I try these bits of advice that make meeting women "easy" or "possible" I'm met with nothing but the same failure I've always known. It works for millions of men so there must be something inherently and fundamentally wrong with me that is incapable of changing.

Who made you believe in those lies? You could easily meet girls but actively avoid doing it. You literally go out of your way to avoid getting girls.

When did you last try something? And what did you try?

>... what if I told you
What subreddits do you browse when you're not giving 4channers shitty life advice?

I can't say because I don't know you. Is it how you behave or talk or something?

The trick is that most normal people have no real idea how they get laid or get boy/girlfriends either. Because of how socially unconstructed our dating/sex culture is right now, everybody is shooting in the dark, unsure of what to do and what "normal" is.

The best thing a person can do for advice isn't pontificate on how they think relationships in general work; nobody really knows; but to just describe how they found success if they found it. Never ask a normie how to get with girls, ask them how they got with the girl they're currently dating.

Sorry, I don't even have a Reddit account. I'm too old for that shit.

>Internet dating is still for social failures.
I am definitely a social failure.
This isn't a thread about how not to be a social failure. This is about getting laid.
I, being social failure, get laid quickly through online dating.

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>We were cursed with poor genetics and women are very harsh when you don't meet their standards of what they consider to be a human.
So now what's your excuse going to be?

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