What JUSTed u? What made you a robot?

Being born an autist ensured that it was over before it even began.

>parents are hoarders and their house is a shithole
thoroughly JUSTed

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Someone close to me dies violently every time I start getting my shit together and I spiral deeper than I was before.

The biggest things

- Growing up without a father OR child support
- Autism
- Becoming the awkward kid in class and just falling more and more behind over time
- Bullied until I had to change schools
- Molested

I've been thinking of why I come here. I think it's ultimately that Jow Forums doesn't trivialise my struggles or how difficult it's going to be to turn things around, the years of work needed. Normies will go like "You're having trouble finding a girl? Just do what I did, bee yourself!" It gives me comfort to see how many other people are going through what I do. I get angry and envious when I go to a normal community and see people married, with families, who own their own house. Here I only have to deal with trolls talking about how roasties will cheat on you with chad.

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Just alienate your friends and familiy, that way you won't care when they die

My genes. Im ugly and have low functioning iq. I am never going to make it.

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constant negativity toward myself and being made fun of by everyone in the room

>strabismus from birth
what the actual fuck, you never stood a chance. I hope you at least die peacefully user.

>let's look at why people end up in jail
>a shitty childhood
>let's look at why people end up in r9k
>a shitty childhood
>maybe we should try to prevent fucked up people from having kids
>WHAT? THAT WOULD BE EUGENICS YOU FUCKING NAZI

I grew up thinking that learning to become a good person just comes naturally and that some serious external factors come into play to turn somebody into a garbage human being. I realize now that isn't the case and now I'm a piece of shit with no redeeming features and nobody wants anything to do with me. I'm too caught up in depression to have the energy to change. I don't know. I'm too stupid to know what it takes to change.

I did it to myself, now I'm out of practice and too afraid to try being anything else.

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My work ethic is 0 or 100. I either don't try at all and avoid tasks or am a perfectionist workaholic on a task that obsesses until it's over and up to high standards. What kind of upbringing produces this type of person?

this is now a greentext thread, pic related is one of the reasons

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Society.
Original.

>wow the issue is poor communities, bad upbringings, high levels of crime and things that (while would take years and effort) could be addressed
>STRAIGHT TO GENOCIDE XDD

>awkward
>always been an outcast
>try to talk with people, just get told Im awkward or what im saying is """""inappropriate"""""
>I could sit there, just paying attention to what someone is saying and they will tell me that I am am being strange

But that last one. I mean what the fuck. I try to pay attention and listen to people and they tell me Im being weird or they say Im looking at them "blankly"

I yell at people when they do it and say I'm awkward or weird so what? I make fun of how sensitive they are to anything slightly different. It makes them stop saying it to my face.

dont forget about my gyno that didnt go away even after becoming skinny

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>telling people to use birth control is the same as genocide

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>wristlet
>brainlet
>bonelet
>mutt
>manlet

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Fat, gyno, small penis, and low IQ.

>they tell me Im being weird or they say Im looking at them "blankly"

I wish I had this problem. I'm not blank enough, people can tell when I'm bored or contemptuous or what have you, even when I'm trying to politely refrain from letting them know that I think everything they're talking about is stupid.

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dp/dr disorder then it all went downhill

Lack of a father
Supportive but never encouraging mother.
Unchecked mental illness most of my life.
Height (i'm okay with it)
Social anxiety (mostly gotten over/thru it) from years of self isolation
Losing my hair at 25 (Not so okay with it, but I'll just copy Patrick Stewart's look when it starts to get worse.)
Probably some other shit.
I'm not super a robot anymore but I still like you guys when the threads are good and I've gone thru enough shit I can give good advice sometimes to try and help people out.
Robots help each, right?

Absolutely batshit insane single mother that has BPD and an opiate addiction
I should have died multiple times as a child

I was given everything, paid lots of attention to and taught so many life, practical, and academic skills. Yet I squandered it all. What should I do?

autism, adhd, depression, addiction, ptsd, ocd. nothing diagnosed in life til it was too late. i'm 27 now and all i want is to die so i don't have to burden my family.

I can't relate on any personal level to anyone irl especially females

the fact that ive been browing this board since i was 12 in 2018

my father... who never showed me how to do anything, who cuts me down whenever a chance arises, who treats me like im unable to do anything....

who blamed me for breaking my fucking back at work and said it was my own fault.... after 7 years of working on my own, i have had to come back home and work for him and I can safely say that being older and more mature and rational... it was always him who was the problem..

hes right tho... most people should not fucking breed, over half of generation x is a pure fucking genuine example of that... they absolutely peaked the divorce rate and there is probaly another 25 percent of broken dysfunctional marriages who fucked up their kids on top of that.

But the millenials will fucking make that look like nothing, which is why nearly all of my peers who are in early 30s are not married and probaly never will.

This what the new Weimar Republic looks like... this is what it looks like when people ignore the root problems and pretend it will fix its self, or pretend a savior will come around, or pretend its not that bad.

>What JUSTed u?

puberty for sure. I maintained the same exact same mentality and brain while transforming physically from a cute kid to a malformed severe acne-ridden thing in the course of 12-24 months. I was on here trying to find porn and gore at age 9 way back around 2008-ish. I remember being literally surprised at the physical strength I was gaining but at the same time not being able to look at myself in the mirror and consciously avoiding other people trying to take group photos. I was the ugliest kid but always good at chess and pushups

It wasn't a single thing. Overprotective parents that put too many hopes on my shoulers, botched emotional development, school bullying, my very short height that's always made me feel defenseless around grups of larger men, and I suspect I have some mild form of autism.

Story? Your mom sounds like a total cunt. I'm sorry that you had to live trough that. But at the same time, think you managed to live trough and beyond that.

What should they not have protected you from?

Everything. I was never allowed to go naywhere alone or "get dirty" and play with other kids or pushed into physical activity or anything beyond doing well in school at an age where the law rightfully treats you like a retard because you're not even fully self-aware, so whatever parents want to imprint on you is probably going to stick. I became fearful of everything and with basically no self-confidence.

My trans gf broke up with me. I thought I went to the bottom of the barrel and I still wasn't enough.

I was put into all kinds of sports lessons. Every year I was put in a lesson of some kind but the focus was exercise and skill building not being in competitive team sports.

Well good for you, that's exactly what I wish my parents had done for me. I'd still be a (not literal) midget but at least I wouldn't be this much of a wreck.

How do you think it would have changed your personality?

Oof, I'm sorry user. Are your initials J.L by chance?

Being a "tribe" with other children your age literally rewires your brain toward being more social and confident because you know for a fact you can socialize and physically compete.

Please describe. My house is filthy and jam packed with garbage and junk. Every room is like a landfill, even the stairwells and hallways.

my fucking willpower. i seem to crumble under some of the lightest conditions, and it causes my self-esteem to drop, which in turn makes me crumble easier.

Yeah me its always either people think Im pissed off, too """"""serious"""""" or the blank shit. I feel like I need a balance.

I'm the same way. A psychologist told me I have an all or nothing personality

What kind of upbringing did you have? I want to know if a certain upbringing causes it.

sounds kind of like gender dysphoria desu.
ive been justed by the same exact thing though

Tumultuous. I wouldn't consider the all or nothing thing to be a positive or a negative. It has its uses. I'm very good at getting good at things I enjoy.

My upbringing wasn't as bad as a lot of anons, but it was definitely below average. My father was largely absent during my childhood because he was working, and never really ever taught me anything during my developmental stages. My mom was bipolar and was me and my sisters primary caregiver. I grew up in fear of her because I would never know if she'd be nice and kind or fly off the handle over the tiniest thing. My sister was a pathological liar. As the eldest I was sheltered from a lot of experiences and felt a lot like a LOT of parental pressure to succeed. I experienced rejection and abuse from my peers, though it became subtle the older I got to the point where I've gaslit myself into wondering if i was just imagining it all. I was always the weird friend, and the easy target. I was soft, too compassionate. "Gay kid" "faggot" etc. Later, my sister started going down a poor path, and the pressure for me to be "the good and successful kid" became too much and I totally buckled. I rejected deep relationships and sexuality because of avoidant personality disorder and being unsure of my own sexuality and not wanting to confirm everyone's suspicions. I also developed a severe chronic illness that almost killed me and had me in a hospital for my young adulthood. My mom mellowed out eventually, and my dad came back into my life as a major player again but I never know if he's going to yell at me or what. I feel like a disappointment, magnified by my sister getting her shit together and upstaging me as the good kid. I wish I was never born, but there's nothing I can do about that.

Now I'm in my early / mid twenties and just flat out have like, the life experience of less than a teenager because of sheltering, avoidance, and a half decade medical "time out." I'm getting my shit together but it's hard.

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I also suspect I may have been sexually abused and am repressing the shit out of it but I don't know.

I felt very stifled by expectation growing up and was never able to express myself, and when I did I wouldn't be frequently shot down, so I just powered down into low power mode to coast day to day in a grey melancholy. I'm coming out of my shell again now that I'm on the cusp of freedom and going completely fucking bonkers from a lifetime of virtual serfdom

Tormented every day I went to school
Father was a drunk and abusive
Mother didn't care and never did shit for me
A good day in my life is a day no one talks to me and I'm left alone in the real

Video game controller fell in the dog dish and couldn't get another one

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Yep pretty much the same dude. I could never have had friends over let alone a girl.

Raised by an overprotective single mother, don't think anything else needs to be said

It's even worse because we have "sheer" blinds so the windows are not covered and people can see in. Basically no privacy. When the lights go on at night, you can see every room in the house and all the garbage piled up nearly to the ceiling. We are the trash family in the neighborhood and people come by and dump garbage in our yard. Outside of the house looks like shit.

>be gay
>christian parents

Oops I'm on Jow Forums now

Crooked, twisted spine

A family friend raped me while he was supposed to be watching me. My parents found out because they noticed my butt bleeding and how I always complained about my vagina hurting. But they didnt do anything. One day we were driving and we saw him (it all transpired in a small town where my grandma lives, I was staying over hers when it happened) and my mom said to my dad: thats the guy that raped femanon! But we just drove on by.

Through my teen years from about 12 and onwards I have had to deal with a lot of predators completely by myself. And at several points when my parents found out that child molesters and so forth were extorting me for nude photos at ages like 12 and 13 they did not do anything to him but I got in heaps of trouble.

I am a basket case.

I manage to act pretty normal in daily interactions to the best of my ability but I do have random horrible intrusive thoughts, disturbing sexual inclinations, suicidal thoughts from a very early age, extreme self hatred and self harm problems, eating disorders and so forth. Sometimes I have complete breakdowns and cant even go about my day without taking a break to cry in the bathroom or something.

It could have been worse but they almost makes me sadder. When I hear it happening to other kids and they die or something I feel so sad I couldnt be them instead, that I couldnt have been the one to take their pain

>What JUST'd you

Probably being fat and having low self esteem. Tbh I probably blew it and continue to blow it out of proportion but constantly losing my best friends and being alone doesn't help

Shit, would you be glad if someone vigilante killed the guy who raped you?

they raped you in both holes? howd they get in your butt? isnt that something that needs prep?
sorry if this sounds insensitive but what positions did they do you in? why didnt you tell on him right away? cops?

What are the sexual inclinations?

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My dad sent a text meant from my mom to me about how disappointed he was in me and how he thought I was selfish and inconsiderate, among other things. It basically confirmed all my thoughts about my dad hating me and blaming himself for how I turned out

I found out that I didn't really want to "make it".

I dont have any idea where he is or what his name is. If he has done this to other kids then absolutely but to avenge just me I would feel guilty

He tried but failed to insert in my vagina. Obviously didnt prep my butt or anything just spat and whatnot. Im not elaborating for you disgusting perv. I was 8 years old had no idea what was really happening, he told me it was normal and obviously to never tell anyone or he would hurt my parents, he told me it was what he had to do, it was what I deserved for being a little nigger and so on. I was just extremely confused and just wanted to sleep forever and never wake up.

Extreme masochism, being mutilated and snuff being the top tier. But pretty much the entire gambit of masochistic activities are enjoyable for me, especially those that involve humiliation and some form of permanent mental abuse/mindbreaking in addition to the physical. I have never had sex except for then but that is all I fantasize about. Vanilla does not interest me

if you're a rapist I hope you live the most excruciatingly painful life and die slowly, suffering every moment

t. ptsd

I originally thought that this thread said WHO not WHAT JUST-ed your life.

To the question of who it would be the guy who raped me, but my mom certainly exacerbated it with her complicity and my dad just followed what she says because he had no idea how to handle the situation

So would you let a guy eat you out, or would there need to be burning, choking, etc? Do you allow yourself to receive pleasure or do you just want to suck lots of dick?

puberty for the most part, everyone around me was growing up and their interests changed from videogames and toys to girls and drugs. Being a moralfag I refused to take part and got outed lickity split so now I've been dealing with being alone for about 5 years now

I would let him do whatever he wants to me. I dont think I would enjoy being eaten out or pleasured, but doing sexual acts that are not enjoyable for me is enjoyable...so in a loophole-y way yes.

I only want to marry one guy and be his complete and utter sex toy/doll to act, live, and perform however he wants. The more degrading and humiliating and painful the act the better.

Blowjobs we ultra vanilla tier but what I like to that end are like throat fucking until it makes me puke/actually choke

So do you think you'd cheat on a guy if he didn't give it to you roughly and degradingly?

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Uh no but I would be unsatisfied for sure.

When the girl I loved killed herself without leaving a note

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When my father wasn't in my life and my mother died

My parents were these insane conspiracy theorist who basically made me do nuclear-war drills every week so I could never party or go out on weekends. When I was 15 I got arrested for illegally owning weapons and people started thinking I was up to something so no one talked to me throughout school.

>5"6'
>6 incher
>distant relationship with father
>overly paranoid about how others would perceive me
>skinny/wristlet
>boring personality
>unwillingness to talk to others
>underachiever
>been constantly told by my mother that I'm stupid, so over time, I actually think I may be retarded

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Wew
Too many jake Paul videos

Who do you live with now? I'm sorry to hear about it.

My parents and siblings still. Will soon be a senior in college now

That would be incredibly authoritarian. It's none of your fucking business.

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Why didn't your dad kill the guy? I would have. You have shit parents. It's not your fault.

>what made you a robot

user... your always a robot, we are born robots

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>the virgin son
>The Chad Mom

that is pretty funny actually

Birth

Father is some kind of retard or failed abortion.

Mum was kicked out by her ex alpha nigger tier husband out of their shared apartment and moved in with le untermensch kid that is my father because his mental illness/ low IQ dissalvows him to really see anything wrong with this despite her two other kids from previous marriage.

What ensued after this was 25 years of nothing less than torture, financial draining by the disgusting whore, bullying by siblings, abuse from insect tier money leeching mother and general despair.

I genuinely need to kill myself but can't get around to it, life is hell.

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Say no to single mothers, retards.

They are cancerous whores and deserve their fate 100%

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Probably my prone masturbation habit since youth which has made it impossible for me to have sex conventionally. Also autist traits, ugliness (mostly in teen years), and sheer laziness contributed.

Oh my fuck, same situation here. Dealing with their constant bullshit and hoarding has aged me 40 years in the 20 I've been alive.

See I really dont know and my memory is fuzzy about this but I think I heard them saying at some point that they would try not to make a big deal about it and that I would just forget, and that that would be better

Nothing happened and that is my key problem. I made nothing happen. I stood by and let things fall apart. I didn't do anythign with my time. My peers were out accomplishing things, having experiences, doing shit. I just sat in my room in front of the computer and told myself I was happy.