We can lift, but can we kill a pitbull with our bare hands?

I have a wrestling background, I'm good at keeping things away from my head and neck, and I could probably lift it up and slam it since they weigh less than 70 lbs. I don't think I would have a good time in the process though.

Boyscouts used to give info on that kind of thing

The boyscouts manuel i read said wave a stick or some other object in front of it, its instinct will be to bite whatevers closest. Once it bites the stick kick its head/neck

A lone wolf isn't exactly hard to fight off my guy, they weigh like 80 pounds. There is a reason their pack animals...

A wolf weighs closer to 180 lbs what are you talking about my man

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The gray wolf has an average weight of 88 pounds. The highest recorded ever was 176 pounds. en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gray_wolf#Anatomy_and_dimensions

Animals average 60% muscle mass to body mass. Humans average 28%
88x0.6=52.8 180x28=50.4. Means that an 88lb dog would still have more muscle than a 180 lb human, and would weigh less than half as much making them both significantly faster and stronger than you. Plus a dog has a jaw. Humans dont have any natural bodily weapons. Wolf would win in a fight every time.

Either
>A) rip out the trachea
>B) wishbone it
>C) curbstomp the ribcage or
>D) shoot the damn thing

>What kind of training would a person need to survive a pitbull attack?
10 minutes of filling out paperwork and a month of waiting

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That is a Malamute.

This guy fucks

The only way to kill a Pittbull is to insert something inside of it’s asshole. Their skulls are strong enough to resist blows from a sledgehammer and continue attacking. Their jaws actually have a locking mechanism to grip prey.

I thought it was boxing a Gorilla?

Crush its windpipe with your grip strength

Dogs have very little kidney protection. Hard blows there and it will start bleeding internally.

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the only thing I can kill with my bare hands is my sex life

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If you are a man you could naturally (no lifting, training, etc)

My recommended routine is 5 x.45ACP

Yeah but what about the guy who killed a grizzly with his bare hands and biting its jugular.

Pop the nigger dog's eyeballs, proceed to fuck its sockets. If you're more than 5 inches, you should be able to reach the brain.

>Dogs can't breath upside down

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Depends on your reaction time

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The biting its jugular was only possible because the it was choking on his arm.
He probably could have just suffocated it to death by keeping his arm in its throat, i assuming it stopped mauling him because it was try to vomit his arm back out

Would you keep fighting someone who was trying to stick a finger up your ass?

Oh piss off with this rubbish.
Morons like you describe pitnigs to be the terminator of dogs.

>"You can't kill them they'll crush you!"
>"Their eyelids are sheets of titanium!"
>"Their jaws have a super complex locking mechanism! Once they lock on they never let go! They go into beast mode and destroy you!"

Shut the fuck up. No one cares about your pathetic dog of peace, mongrel.

Pitbull attack survival training

your not gonna remember any of that when a raging dog comes charging at you

I could kill a pitbull with my bare hands but if a pitbull charged me it wouldn't occur to me to kill it i would just shit myself and run anybody who says otherwise is most likely a liar

Can't you just kick it really hard in the nose? I heard you can knock out a shark by smacking it's nose. Besides, a human can pick up a stick or rock and demolish the dog. Our ability to use tools is our greatest weapon. A human can also swim faster and climb over taller obstacles/ on trees.

Tools do help us a lot but without a proper dagger or something I don’t think it’d help much.

With a proper spear and good martial training I think a person could even defend themselves from something massive like a lion or bear

I am not gonna scan this thread because its probably a high level of autism. Anyways, you can disable a dog by just pulling its front legs away from the body like breaking a wishbone. It essentially kills the dog.

Or if you are canadian, when a dog is biting you and doesnt release. By shoving a finger up its ass it will release out of panic from the sensation. Not even memeing it works.

There’s been a few cases where a pitbull was able to break through the doors of a jeep to get at the people inside

That will just piss it off more. Pitbulls have no real self preservation instinct. That’s how they’re able to continue attacking horses and bulls after being thrown in the air and stomped multiple times and keep mauling the bigger animal to death.

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Don't you know that pitbulls are made of steel op? Not even superman can kill one.

retard

A 200 kg male adult SILVERBACK can lift 10 tons, there’s no way a man can beat it even with melee weapons. It can rip you in half with one arm

>A 200 kg male adult SILVERBACK can lift 10 tons

absolute fucking retard. kys.

Bro they can lift a ducking school bus off the ground like it’s nothing what makes you think you have a chance

No shitposting, the best way to fight a dog is either
a) Get it on its back, they cant do anything until they flip back over, which you, having 100 pounds on them, will not allow.
b) Grab the back legs. Safer, better, but it is hard to get back there. But once you do, you have complete control over the animal. Pick up both legs like a lawn mower and they lose all mobility.

No they can't

Id let a gorilla charge me. I'd just stand my ground and call its bluff and when it stops right in front of me out of bewilderment and curiosity I'd give it a fuckin haymaker and knock its head right off its dumb fucking body

How wouldn't pushing your fingers in its eye sockets work? I mean, it can keep gnawing at you even after going blind, but if you shove your whole finger up its sockets you would reach its brain no?

I would just give the hairy fucker a roundhouse kick to it’s throat obliterating it’s chances of winning

Not only can you not do any damage with a measly punch through its thick hide and metal like bones, an enraged male SILVERBACK would not stop and go through you like foam. You would be found in tiny bits

Jeeps have cloth doors...

No they can't. Your source is wrong, if have one.

No my dominant aura would challenge the silverbacks and he would have no other choice but to respect me, and with that earned respect I'd punch its head right off its body

based

The Capuchin Monkey can rip off a man’s finger like soaking wet tissue paper on a humid summer day

>thick hide
>metal like bones

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Any social standing you have among humans is completely irrelevant to a male SILVERBACK. If it got angry at you it could just punch through your gut and rip out your spine as easily as I dispense punishment and justice on my slugs

Dafuq? Are you 3rd world?

Dude it’s a big stupid monkey. I would literally just dodge it’s flailing slow arms and chokegrip it or rip the eyes and throat out.

To kill a pitbull you need experts 3
>locksmith to break the locking jaw mechanism
>demolition expert to blow down his reinforced eyelids
>boxer to deliver the fatal kidney punch

Slightly off topic, but would a commercial weed whacker be enough to shred a pitbull's face before he gets to you?

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No, it will break upon it’s titanium hide and the dog will snap it in half like a twig

No

>implying you’re fast enough to dodge any hit thrown by a male SILVERBACK . Even then you couldn’t harm him, he would be impervious to your strikes

>get home after gym
>dog happy to see me
>rolls over for belly rubs
>suffocates
RIP doggy

Lads gorillas can literally rip limbs off of bears and kill them with relative ease. What the fuck makes you think you got a chance?

I really wonder about this a lot. Like, what kind of animal could human take on without using weapons?
Now I know this is a stupid thing to think, but when I see german Shepards or dogs of a similar size I always think "yeah, I could kick its ass". And even When I watch training vids of K9s the training partners never really defend themselves.
Now I know that I would lose because most people, probably including me, just fucking panik when a dog comes running at you with its teeth bared but I really would like to give it a shot.
Anybody here has experience with something like that?
Also, what kind of animal are you positive you could take on?

>Stand close to a wall with your back facing it.
>When the dog pounces upon you, dodge at the last moment and his head hits the wall.
>As the dog tries to regain it's senses, put it in a sleeper.

Yeah a weedwacker would fucking slice a pitbull in two.

Brain always beats brawn

I could definitely beat a cow. Fucking cows, they can barely move.

>the dog will just "pounce" at you like it does in the movies and videogames
I have never seen a dog pounce at anything.

I can beat a cheetah.

When the fuck have gorillas and bears fought? I am sure a grizzly would fuck up a gorilla. Their bones are just too strong for them to get seriously injured, they are heavier than gorillas, and they have claws. Or do you mean those black manlet bears?

An adult male SILVERBACK can destroy a Kodiak bear

>What kind of training would a person need to survive a pitbull attack?
Pistol training.

Can you stop being so autistic? Or is it just your nature?

Dude I've seen both a bear and a silverback gorilla. Bears are so much bigger it's insane. I think an elephant would beat a bear, probably rhinos and hippos. Maybe a tiger or a giraffe (most underrated animal). No other land mammal would beat a grizzly.

Special forced are trained to fight attack dogs without weapons.

You would break your fists trying to punch through its adamantium skin, and then the cow would charge its impervious skull against your chest and go right through you, leaving only a cow-sized hole on you behind.

Pffft I've seen Kung Pow Enter the Fist, I know how to fuck up a cow

don't forget the honey badger.

First of all, don't try any of this.

A particularly strong man could probably fuck up a single wolf. They are bigger than dogs but really not very powerfully built; they are lanklets basically. You could choke one to death, gouge out its eyes, or just try to get a hold of its legs and slam its near lmao1pl8!!!11 weight around. Humans are made for wrestling things, basically. But all of this depends on pure luck; if a wolf manages to get a hold of your neck, you are done for.

Dogs are another matter. Really depends on the breed as you can imagine. Most people would get mauled by a pitbull, and monsters like mastiffs or kangals would fuck up nearly everyone.

You can probably kill cheetahs too; they are pretty weak. Leopards aren't very big but they look really fucking fast, and their claws would cause some serious damage.

Any boar would gut you; you stand no chance against those. Hell, even pigs would probably manage to kill you. Chimps would easily be able to rip regular gym goers to bits. Don't know about baboons.

I personally think I could fuck up a cheetah or a pitbull by taking a lot of damage, and probably a wolf too. Mastiffs would kick my shit in.

I know you are the one shitposting about gorillas and pitbulls tectonic plates for eyelids.
I love you user, whoever you are.

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>Chimps would easily be able to rip regular gym goers to bits
Indeed, but Brock Lesnar would definitely defeat a chimp.

Nigger a Kodiak bear is literally twice the size of a gorilla, at a whopping 300 fucking kilograms.

Tigers would get BTFO by grizzlies. IIRC there was such a fight. Grizzlies are too robust basically; tigers simply can't harm them even though the two are of a similar size.

Polar bear would easily beat a grizzly.

Dog handler training I guess. Pits are luckily rather small, as long as you don't let it get to your throat or neck you'll be fine if you manage to headlock it.

Obviously works on only 1 dog. If it's more than 1 you're fucked without a knife.

How many gorillas could grizzly kill?

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Polar bears are weak and starving

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Fucking retard. Humans don't kill with their hands or claws, they kill with their created tools. We can kill a fucking planet!

You're probably going to get got pretty good but you could probably defeat a pitbull. Just do not go down to its level if possible. Kick the shit out of it.

Doesn't surprise me. I only put a tiger there because I've never seen one and in my head they're gigantic. If they're not good enough, I'll limit it to the other animals on that list.

I'm not convinced this fat guy could kill a housecat.

why would you ever hurt a fellow doggie
they won't mess with you if you don't mess w/ them
don't hurt doggie

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