What the hell is up with people and having literally no pity or sympathy for anyone but themselves? I swear I constantly see people acting ugly to each other. Hell even my roommate is just horrible to everyone in the household. He always takes his anger out on specific people though, usually the ones that won't fight back. I'll call him out on this kind of thing and then he usually just gets exceedingly passive aggressive. It's never enough for a full on fight to happen but he just makes everyone feel like crap and unmotivated to do anything. I think his life just consists of demeaning and shit talking other people. Again, it's not enough to fight the guy over but it just drains on everyone around him. How or why do people like this exist? What purpose does it serve to make everyone around you feel like shit?
Am I the only user in this country that actually feels remorse?
What country do you even live in OP?
Sorry I should have specified. I'm currently living in the U.S. but I'll be leaving for S. Korea in the next two years. I'm going to be teaching there and I don't really plan on leaving when I get there.
Agreed. People don't seem to care or even think about anyone but themselves.
The situation you are in sounds like it sucks. Idk what to suggest but desu it good that you are calling him out and at least trying to help the situation.
Sometimes when people are so passive they just sit back and allow these things to happen. Wouldn't even want to think about how crappy it would be if no one stood up for anything they believed in or helped others.
He probably gets a kick out of acting that way, I guess no behaviour occurs without a stimulus/trigger and reinforcer/consequence so I guess it somehow makes him feel better.
But yeah, people like that suck.
Hope you have a great time in South Korea & you meet some quality people.
I usually put others before me, but that doesn't get you very far, and people try to manipulate me all the time into being their workslave, so yeah, I don't know, OP. I try to be nice to everybody, but their are quite a lot of people who just find it easier to be a dick towards everybody.
Thanks and I hope so too. I assume there will be people like this as well, I can handle it but I feel sorry for the people that just take it. That kind of thing can't be good for anyone over a long period of time.
I don't do passive aggression. Tell him, in these words, that you're going to meet passive aggression with very active fucking aggression, and that pretending not to know what you're talking about isn't going to help him.
Holy shit, this. Fuck people that constantly try to take advantage of a situation or people because they're nice. I've had my roommate ask me for money before because he couldn't pay his rent. I told him I'd get it but he would have to pay me back. Keep in mind his rent is $750 a month. It's been two years and he never paid me back and anytime I call him out on it he'll say something like "oh, but haven't I done enough for you already?" "Aren't we even?" This nigga had never done anything for me, he seems to think that our friendship is enough payment. I fucking hate people like this. Why would anyone intentionally go out of there way to screw people over like this and still try to smile and be nice afterwards.
Do this OP, don't put up with shit. Call out his bullshit then fuck him up.
That is true, when you just accept being treated like crap I think it does end up getting to you. However much you try and ignore the toxic person imo the things said start to build up and end up influencing you and your thought patterns without realising.
It's even more cuel that he picks out the people that won't / don't know how to / can't fight back which just shows what a coward he is.
It's like he's kind of exploiting them and it is probably damaging for everyone's self esteem involved (except his).
>It's even more cuel that he picks out the people that won't / don't know how to / can't fight back which just shows what a coward he is.
I've called out people who do this. I've found that public shaming is the best course of action with people like you described. Tell them, and make sure everyone around them can see and hear it, that it's weird how they always seem to take their anger out on people that won't fight back. Make it abundantly clear to everyone that this guy is an asshole. The best way to make someone stop doing something is to make it socially awkward for them. Nothing teaches a person more than to be a social outcast.
Thank you user, that is very, very true. I should probably try that next time I see someone acting in such a way.
I just hope I would have the guts and the confidence to call the person out if I were to come across a situation like this.
Why dont you and your roommates tell this guy to move out?
As other anons have said, call out his behavor in front of the people he's harrassing. Talk to your roommates about what he is doing and let him and the roommates know its not ok.
If he keeps up with the shit, kick him out or just punch him in the mouth or both.
(In addition to my last post) I must agree that it is weird how these type of toxic people can almost sniff out those who may lack confidence and self esteem to unleash their anger on.
I guess they must just be good at noticing the people they consider 'weaker' and so will target them.
Yeah, I do, I'm pretty hostile irl but aggressively loving online ? Like I pursue people's companionship aggressively online and they block me and tell me I'm being weird? I cause trouble no matter what I do, oh well
Basically I make people uncomfortable with my presence, I feel bad but there's nothing I can do
Mostly because the lease is in his name. We're all renting together but it's in his name.
>I guess they must just be good at noticing the people they consider 'weaker' and so will target them.
I mean it's not really a subconscious thing everyone has the ability to see that someone is meek. I can think of 6 people off the top of my head that I could fuck with and they'd never really seek help. Heck I could probably convince one to commit suicide if I tried hard enough. I'm not saying I would because I'm not a monster but I know people that are like that.
The world is a cold place, and normies and robots feel better acting shitty and smug than they do being nice/helping people because being an asshole is easy and it's hard to go out on a limb and trust someone.
That doesn't mean you stop trying to improve yourself or the world, nor does it give you license to be a shithead, it just means you want to be like all the heartless shitheads that made you a mean person.
Why?
Why do people think acting this way will make them happy?
True & glad to hear you're not a sociopathic dickhead.
Just a thought, maybe you could have a chat with the people who he is specifically targeting, you may be able to help the situation by checking in on them or helping them see what this guy is doing and why they should stick up for themselves. If you create a more secure friendly relationship between everyone in the household except this guy, his actions could have less effect. (aka stronger together kind of thing, you could have flatmate meeting to discss what to do (espcially if you've got like another year + with the guy) as I bet you're not the only one who is sick and tired of him.
>HAVING SYMPATHY
>HAVING MORALS
HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHAHHAHAHAHAHHOHOHOAHOAHOAHOAHOHOHOEHEHEHEHAHEAHOEAHAHAHAHAHHAA FAGGOT F A G G O T
750$ is alot of money, yea that sucks. Esp if he has enough money to pay you back and is just refusing,
I've noticed this too. It was really bad in HS but it's really just as bad in the adult world, if not worse. I kind of have a theory on it but I might just be autistic too, but here goes. I think a lot of people never really learned that life isn't fair. They think everyone gets what they deserved. It's a good coping method, and takes a lot off of your mind mentally and a lot off your moral implications and effort physically.
A lot of people, when they see someone in a very bad situation, seem to just say "oh well, they brought it on themselves".
That always bothered me, because people always use that as an excuse to be able to make fun of them, or not care about them, or as an excuse to not help them or even be kind to them. People just fucking love feeling superior to someone, and there is no one that is easier to do with than the unfortunate. This can also be the reason no one is really very selfless anymore. When you don't really have any prinicples other than personal gain and no empathy because of the areformentioned quote, anytime they could help someone becomes "why should I? What's in it for me?" Even some very alrtuistic seeming people I've met admitted they only do it to feel better about themselves or look better to others. I am the only one I know of who would actually do something selfless, fucking picking up a piece of garbage you see on the ground is a foreign concept to people because "they weren't the ones who put it there" It's frusturating as hell but I've kind of learned to just accept it as the way most people are. When you open your eyes to it it is really quite shocking.